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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/23 20:47:14
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Calculating Commissar
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aka_tizz wrote:metallifan wrote:aka_tizz wrote:An SoB with Power Legs seems enticing enough though 
Not if she's referred to as "Sister Thunder Thighs". Then I want no part of it. 
Then you get your Brother Storm Shield on and go for it 
Power Armoured Jimmy-Caps eh? You might be on to something there...
Whoop. Never mind. Someone beat you to it
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This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2010/04/23 21:47:45
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/23 21:41:55
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Nasty Nob
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Kervin wrote:Saintspirit wrote:Thou shalt not date the hawt chick with claws.
But what about a SoB with power claws?
I don't think a SoB would be accepted if she was orky. Nor if she was Yarr-icky.
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/23 21:52:22
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Decrepit Dakkanaut
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FREEMraider with attached power plant
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/23 22:00:29
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Focused Dark Angels Land Raider Pilot
Eeeveryvehr
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metallifan wrote:aka_tizz wrote:metallifan wrote:aka_tizz wrote:An SoB with Power Legs seems enticing enough though  Not if she's referred to as "Sister Thunder Thighs". Then I want no part of it.  Then you get your Brother Storm Shield on and go for it  Power Armoured Jimmy-Caps eh? You might be on to something there... Whoop. Never mind. Someone beat you to it  LOOOOOOL "The Emperor Protects"=)))))) I got beaten to it because for some unknown reasons Mozilla refused to show last reply (maybe it felt offended  )    Damn it, 10 min and i'm still laughing
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This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/04/23 22:01:34
Could you be there
'cause I'm the one who waits for you
Or are you unforgiven too? |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/29 17:34:38
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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On a Canoptek Spyder's Waiting List
Cologne, Germany
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/29 17:48:58
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Member of the Malleus
Pasadena, California
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Bringing home a genestealer to meet the family and show your parents that they are going to be grandparents!
(or did we all just forget genestealers rape people to make weird hybrids..)
Petting a wolf guard.
Telling the blood angels everything will be alright and to just count to ten.
Watering the Necrons.
Getting into a fist fight with a fire warrior.. Well you should probly do that, make yourself feel good.
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 01:15:52
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Pyromaniac Hellhound Pilot
Nucia
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Shatter.proof wrote:Bringing home a genestealer to meet the family and show your parents that they are going to be grandparents!
(or did we all just forget genestealers rape people to make weird hybrids..)
O.O please tell me you are BSing!
But if your not.........*Vomits all over the place*.......Thats gross....=/
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So, I was in this place people call the mall a while back. And I had the urge to expel some bad spirits. As I went into the bathroom, I chose the urinal closes to the corner so I could have some privacy. So I whip out Lord Pevincy and let him loose the bad spirits. Well, I was looking at the wall as the Lord was expelling the spirits and I seemed to have gotten distracted. Turns out, I missed a little.
SO I'm sitting at my computer right, and I have a Coke, Bottled mind you. But it got warm, so I got a Coffie cup and I filled it with the coke and some Ice and I sipped as I did my internet stuff. So like and hour passed and I hadn't sipped any of it. and when I go to sip it, I notice that something solid is in it. So I'm like, "No, why would there be something solid in my coke?" SO I pull these solid THINGS off my tongue and guess what they are? F ING ANTS! I was like WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And so I ran into the Kitchen coughing and what not and I threw those little bastards down the drain with a flood of hate and cold water.......those bastards are lucky I don't have my Nucians yet!!! |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 01:39:06
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Stabbin' Skarboy
123 fake street
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Genestealers primary funcution is to be intergalactic sexual offendors.
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"I can envision a world with no war, pain, or strife, were peace is constant, then I envision attacking that world because they'd never see it coming."
- Orks, 4175 points
- The face of an opponent when you lose five dozen models and say "that's it?", priceless. |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 01:56:08
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Pyromaniac Hellhound Pilot
Nucia
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......I don't know if your being truthful.....but...... if so.......gross.......
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So, I was in this place people call the mall a while back. And I had the urge to expel some bad spirits. As I went into the bathroom, I chose the urinal closes to the corner so I could have some privacy. So I whip out Lord Pevincy and let him loose the bad spirits. Well, I was looking at the wall as the Lord was expelling the spirits and I seemed to have gotten distracted. Turns out, I missed a little.
SO I'm sitting at my computer right, and I have a Coke, Bottled mind you. But it got warm, so I got a Coffie cup and I filled it with the coke and some Ice and I sipped as I did my internet stuff. So like and hour passed and I hadn't sipped any of it. and when I go to sip it, I notice that something solid is in it. So I'm like, "No, why would there be something solid in my coke?" SO I pull these solid THINGS off my tongue and guess what they are? F ING ANTS! I was like WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And so I ran into the Kitchen coughing and what not and I threw those little bastards down the drain with a flood of hate and cold water.......those bastards are lucky I don't have my Nucians yet!!! |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 02:53:24
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine
In a Toyota, plotting revenge.
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Not the genestealers themselves. They always leave one surviver who become increaslingly horny and gets a raging hard-on for anything in sight. Think of them as a bunch of screaming, scratching testosterones. This is actually fact.
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metallifan said: I almost wonder is "Matt Ward" another pen name for C.S. Goto?
metallifan said: The Imperium would probably love Hitler...
Play KoL! Click my sig to go to the main website and sign up!
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 03:05:10
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Calculating Commissar
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Basically one of them jams it's diddley stick down your throat and fires off Genestealer seeds into your chest that somehow affect your babies down the road.
Pretty fethed up stuff.
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 04:44:50
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Pyromaniac Hellhound Pilot
Nucia
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O.O ............gross........Thanks for telling me this =/
I definitely know now that I should just kill myself if I'm going to lose a fight with a genestealer.....
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So, I was in this place people call the mall a while back. And I had the urge to expel some bad spirits. As I went into the bathroom, I chose the urinal closes to the corner so I could have some privacy. So I whip out Lord Pevincy and let him loose the bad spirits. Well, I was looking at the wall as the Lord was expelling the spirits and I seemed to have gotten distracted. Turns out, I missed a little.
SO I'm sitting at my computer right, and I have a Coke, Bottled mind you. But it got warm, so I got a Coffie cup and I filled it with the coke and some Ice and I sipped as I did my internet stuff. So like and hour passed and I hadn't sipped any of it. and when I go to sip it, I notice that something solid is in it. So I'm like, "No, why would there be something solid in my coke?" SO I pull these solid THINGS off my tongue and guess what they are? F ING ANTS! I was like WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And so I ran into the Kitchen coughing and what not and I threw those little bastards down the drain with a flood of hate and cold water.......those bastards are lucky I don't have my Nucians yet!!! |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 04:57:53
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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The Conquerer
Waiting for my shill money from Spiral Arm Studios
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thats just normal Genestealers.
you don't even want to know what Yrmgal's do with those tenticals.
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Self-proclaimed evil Cat-person. Dues Ex Felines
Cato Sicarius, after force feeding Captain Ventris a copy of the Codex Astartes for having the audacity to play Deathwatch, chokes to death on his own D-baggery after finding Calgar assembling his new Eldar army.
MURICA!!! IN SPESS!!! |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 11:24:56
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Hardened Veteran Guardsman
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you know i was actualy trying to forget about the 'stealers 'little secrets' thnks a lot people!
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 17:09:11
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Pyromaniac Hellhound Pilot
Nucia
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*vomits at the thought of tentacle porn*
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So, I was in this place people call the mall a while back. And I had the urge to expel some bad spirits. As I went into the bathroom, I chose the urinal closes to the corner so I could have some privacy. So I whip out Lord Pevincy and let him loose the bad spirits. Well, I was looking at the wall as the Lord was expelling the spirits and I seemed to have gotten distracted. Turns out, I missed a little.
SO I'm sitting at my computer right, and I have a Coke, Bottled mind you. But it got warm, so I got a Coffie cup and I filled it with the coke and some Ice and I sipped as I did my internet stuff. So like and hour passed and I hadn't sipped any of it. and when I go to sip it, I notice that something solid is in it. So I'm like, "No, why would there be something solid in my coke?" SO I pull these solid THINGS off my tongue and guess what they are? F ING ANTS! I was like WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And so I ran into the Kitchen coughing and what not and I threw those little bastards down the drain with a flood of hate and cold water.......those bastards are lucky I don't have my Nucians yet!!! |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 19:15:50
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Perfect Shot Dark Angels Predator Pilot
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Tease a SM librarian with magic tricks
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Follow me if i advance
kill me if i retreat
Avenge me if i die |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 19:19:56
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Servoarm Flailing Magos
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Things not to do in the 40k universe:
Live in the 40k universe.
That is all.
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"Praise Be To The Omissiah!"
"Three things make the Empire great: Faith, Steel and Gunpowder!"
Azarath Metrion Zinthos
Expect my posts to have a bazillion edits. I miss out letters, words, sometimes even entire sentences in my points and posts.
Come at me Heretic. |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 20:23:53
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Nimble Dark Rider
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Dont use the bathroom after a Plague Marine has been in there.
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Malifaux - Rezzers
The Other Side - King's Empire & Abysinnia
40K - Iron Hands
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/04/30 20:27:50
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Calculating Commissar
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I wouldn't use a bathroom in the 40K universe, period.
Being as GRIMDARK as it is, the toilet is probably an oversized human skull, and the seat would likely be covered in spikes and barbed wire.
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/02 10:31:51
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Imperial Recruit in Training
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Do not:
Enter any room with the lights turned off.
Entertain the idea that your Lasgun is anything but an overpowered flashlight.
Bother putting on your Flak vest, your not fooling anyone.
Ask for artillery support, it always falls short.
Hide behind a tank, It'll probably reverse.
Follow any advice in your Imperial Infantrymans Uplifting Primer. For Example:
Orks:
"Orks are cowards"
"Orks may seem to be heavily muscled, but the fact is their muscle tissue is not as dense as a human's. In actuality they are considerably weaker than the average man, despite what their appearance suggests."
"After they have seen you with a loaded Lasgun and a smile on your face, you can shoot them in the back as they run away"
Genestealers: "are generally slow and sluggish, and have been seen to attack their own breatheren when panicked"
Have "puny claws"
Eldar:
"Eldar technology is antiquated"
"Be assured, if caught in a more even match these spineless sluggards will turn tail and run!"
Tau:
"Beware of the Tau! They will sacrifice your babies to their gods!"
"Tau have hollow bones. Their limbs will break easily under little applied pressure"
"Tau have poor eye sight. Anything over ten meters away is a blur"
"Tau are frightened by Fire"
"Tau are frightened by Water"
"Tau are frightened by Thunder"
For the sake of your own health do not point out any of these discrepancies to a Commissar
As an Inquisitor do not utter the words "I, like God, do not play with dice and I don't believe in coincidences" when conducting an investigation. It won't end well trust me.
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/02 10:42:35
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Scarred Ultramarine Tyrannic War Veteran
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Throw eggs at a CSM Defiler
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"Whilst we stand, we fight. Whilst we fight, we prevail. Nothing shall stay our wrath"
Guilliman and the Ultramarines are like Manchester United, everyone hates them because they are so awesome!
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/02 12:04:33
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Deadly Dark Eldar Warrior
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Ask the emperor if hes fried or roasted
tell nurgle he smell gud
tell khorne red is outdated
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VISIT THE BLOG!!
http://bondhobby.blogspot.com/
http://bondhobby.blogspot.com/
http://bondhobby.blogspot.com/
thnx |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/02 13:47:43
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Pyromaniac Hellhound Pilot
Nucia
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Be a Poor_Fething_Guardsmen with a generic name.
@Poor_Fething_Guardsmen - You don't have a generic name do you?
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So, I was in this place people call the mall a while back. And I had the urge to expel some bad spirits. As I went into the bathroom, I chose the urinal closes to the corner so I could have some privacy. So I whip out Lord Pevincy and let him loose the bad spirits. Well, I was looking at the wall as the Lord was expelling the spirits and I seemed to have gotten distracted. Turns out, I missed a little.
SO I'm sitting at my computer right, and I have a Coke, Bottled mind you. But it got warm, so I got a Coffie cup and I filled it with the coke and some Ice and I sipped as I did my internet stuff. So like and hour passed and I hadn't sipped any of it. and when I go to sip it, I notice that something solid is in it. So I'm like, "No, why would there be something solid in my coke?" SO I pull these solid THINGS off my tongue and guess what they are? F ING ANTS! I was like WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And so I ran into the Kitchen coughing and what not and I threw those little bastards down the drain with a flood of hate and cold water.......those bastards are lucky I don't have my Nucians yet!!! |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/02 19:05:48
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Veteran Inquisitorial Tyranid Xenokiller
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Land on the 'Rock' and go up the tower or sing 'everybody hurts' to a dark angel
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Brb learning to play.
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/02 20:46:47
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine
In a Toyota, plotting revenge.
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Challenge Marneus Calgar to an arm wrestling match.
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metallifan said: I almost wonder is "Matt Ward" another pen name for C.S. Goto?
metallifan said: The Imperium would probably love Hitler...
Play KoL! Click my sig to go to the main website and sign up!
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/03 10:53:23
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Imperial Recruit in Training
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Commissar NIkev wrote:Be a Poor_Fething_Guardsmen with a generic name.
@Poor_Fething_Guardsmen - You don't have a generic name do you?
No my names actually quite unique
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/03 18:36:05
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Lone Wolf Sentinel Pilot
Inside that little light in your refridgerator
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Attempt to head-butt your way through the front armour of a land raider
S_P
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Fafnir wrote:What part of "giant armoured ork suppository" do you not understand?
Balance wrote:Nothing wrong with feathers. Now, the whole chicken, that's kinky. |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/03 19:02:48
Subject: Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Purposeful Hammerhead Pilot
pelvic thrusting in awkward moments
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get a gigantic, lightsaber wielding, dark-side powered titan with the voice of James Earl Jones.
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Grey Templar wrote:
The real reason Obi-wan said there was a "disturbance in the force" was that was the very moment Shas'o vera was born. it was so awsome and terrible it could be felt through time and across the dimensions.
"Millions of voices cried out in Terror, and were suddenly silenced" |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/03 20:12:52
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Ground Crew
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Hide behind a skimmer for cover.
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10000
4000 |
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![[Post New]](/s/i/i.gif) 2010/05/03 21:06:13
Subject: Re:Things not to do in the 40k universe
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Purposeful Hammerhead Pilot
pelvic thrusting in awkward moments
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slushy112 wrote:Hide behind a skimmer for cover.
tie yourself to the back of the skimmer for cover
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Grey Templar wrote:
The real reason Obi-wan said there was a "disturbance in the force" was that was the very moment Shas'o vera was born. it was so awsome and terrible it could be felt through time and across the dimensions.
"Millions of voices cried out in Terror, and were suddenly silenced" |
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