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Granted. Now you can never afford a miniature even if you saved all your income for 40 years.

I wish I owned a planet just like earth just without the people and in this solar system.

Granted. A huge crisis erupts all over the world as people fight over that planet. You are backstabbed in the process and lose your planet.

I wish I knew if investing in the Ouya is a good thing.

Granted. After losing your entire investment you are certain it is not a good idea.

I wish for bigger crowds.

Granted. They are so big they trample you

I wish I had a tamed pet hormagaunt completely under my control and the government didn't care.

Granted. But when it lays its eggs, you have 101 hormagaunts, and only one is under your control. This is why we don't keep tyranids as pets

I wish I was better at converting miniatures.

Granted. GW steals all of them from you and publish them as actual miniatures.
I wish I could switch between the 40k dimension and the real dimension. So like, step through a portal and I'm one, step through the other and I'm back in the other.

Granted, the first time you step through the portal you pop out on Terra. Unfortunatly for you its right in the middle of the Seige of Terra and you had the misfortune to pop out right in front of some Emperors Children.

No wish. Feeling merciful.
You drown in coke.
I wish that I was one of my race's heroes.
Specifically the Archangel Champion

^^^ This Guy Breaking the Chain

Granted you step through that portal aswell and end up on the first page of this forum which states the guidelines

I Wish the Eldar 6th Codex to be next in line after Chaos, even if matt ward writes it

Woah woah whoah there!
I made the wish!

But granted.
Everything has been nerfed and the fluff has been changed so they are now abhuman regiments of the Imperial Guard.
My wish?
I wish that I was one of my race's heroes.
Specifically the Archangel Champion

Sure. Your race is then crushed by my IG regiment, Grey Knight Brotherhood, Titan Legions...

I wish I was immune to disease.

Granted. Then you are accused of being an immortal daemon and killed by the IG regiment, GK brotherhood, and Titan legions.

I wish the "Beat This Unit" thread hadnt crashed.

It didn't. But people just reply to every unit with "Hydra".

For the record, I started that trend. I was doing it befor it was cool [/hipster]

I wish I wasn't killed by the Ig regiment, etc.

Granted! Instead you´re killed by 3 grotz.

I wish for a burnt uneatable pizza.

Fine.

It's burnt from the bomb blast that it was caught in. While you held it.

I wish I could meet SAXTON HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALE.

Granted. He uses you as a battering ram to break down a locked door and diffuse a bomb.

I wish for a better computer

Sure. It has no battery or power cable.

I wish I was adored by everyone.

Granted. You are a kitten.

I wish Ironbreakers could fight with spears.

Granted. An almighty roar signaled the charge of the Ironbreakers. For the small pockets of Dark Elves scattered throughout the battlefield, the image of the dwarven army along with their Spear allies was a mighty image to behold indeed.

But alas, disaster struck!

Excited at the prospect of blood, the Spears pierced the ranks of their Ironbreaker allies as they sought to reach the enemy. The whole dwarven army was left humiliated and destroyed.

I wish parties weren't so noisy.

Granted. Instead of being noisy, everyone just stands there in silence.
I wish I knew how to start my codex.

Granted! You decide to do the codex Ward Style.

I wish my dad wasn´t so judgmental on my friends.

Granted - your mom is.

I wish Halo 4 would be released sooner.

Granted! It doesn´t even look like Halo at all, it just looks like bunch of lights and triggers.

i wish a tree would grow in my room tonight.

Granted. It grows out of your mouth.
I wish I didn't start my codex Ward style and it actually was accepted as an eligible race by GW.

Granted. Codex is a huge hit with the best balance ever. But GW only hints about it for years and never releases it.

I wish for more Halloween fun this weekend.

That's actually quite nice of you to say that.

No wish, you receive a free nuclear explosion.

I wish for the new chaos models for free.

They get mailed to Omegon instead.

I wish for explosions that didn't happen near or on or in me.

Granted - your house blows up while your out.

I wish for new shoes.