Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

So having suffered a most unfair defeat at Fantasy today, I though we could do with a thread for much wailing and gnashing of teeth, so we can share each others dice related misery. (please note this is entirely tongue in cheek).

So I shall start off. 3,000 against Daemons, using me Dark Elves. Started off pretty well, single Chariot humped a unit of Flesh Hounds with Jugger Herald on the charge, and then nicked off into his deployment zone. Yeah. That was about it. Next turn, a 2nd Chariot charges an identical unit (5 Hounds, Jugger Herald) and proceeds to do....nothing. At all. Not even a single steenkeeng wound. The dice hated me. And continued. I'd got lucky and his Bloodthirster failed to charge a Hydra, leaving me in position to counter charge with said Hydra, and a Chariot for luck. Except the sodding Chariot went and failed it's Fear test, preventing it charging in.

All went down hill from there. Sure, I made some mistakes but the dice seriously took the piss. :(

I had a Warmachine/Hordes game yesterday where we both struggled to roll anything over 4 on 2d6 or 6 on 3d6.

I suppose it was somewhat amusing to see stuff like a heavy warbeast charge a small shooty unit and fail to hit with any attacks, then said unit fail to hit the warbeast with their pistols at point blank, then the warbeast failing all its attacks again...

I still won, mostly thanks to dunking all the opponent's warjacks into a puddle that he put in the middle of the table for some reason (my warbeasts are immune to puddles, lol)

Yup. I know that one.

Didn't help I played like a spazz but still, the dice were out to get me!

Start of turn two with my "fun" campaign list.
Warphead rolls for his power. Gets a Frazzle result. I think, "Crap! Use me re-roll!"
I get the 'Ere We Go! result. Ah, buggery.
So I zap to behind my enemy, about 11 inches from any board edge, thinking I'll be fairly safe.
Scatter arrow directly towards the edge. Boxcars on the dice. 1 on the mishap table. Good bye, 30 Shootas with Nob and Warphead. At 1000 points, no less.
Oi, GW: Random does not equal fun!

Playing 40K a couple nights ago with my CSM against IG. it was an objectives games and i went first. i moved up, my rhinos 12' and unloaded 2 squads of marines who RAPID FIRED their bolters (and 2 plasma guns in each squad). no wounds. i rolled 1s on the to wound rolls for my plasma guns. i shot with my defiler and vindicator, and both scattered 8 inches into my guys. i lost the game horribly b/c i had the same luck rest of the game.

However i would like to say @ Da Boss that i quite enjoy that random aspect of the game. if that aspect wasnt in the game then it would be as simple as "my marines have strong armor. your guard have weak guns. i win" but thats just MHO so think as you will

May all of your dice roll sixes in the future

Once had Kharn kill both of my defilers in CC against a marine squad. So many 1's but oh sure, he rolls well when he wants to blow up my own machines >.>

I've had the occasional night where I roll badly the whole time and lose, and then there are those times when I need anything but a 1, and I get a won.

The first was my SM vs. some IG. I was fielding a Chapter Master at the time. I used his orbital bombardment on a Basilisk that had already done some serious damage in the past two enemy shooting phases. I manage to hit the the thing, an would have gotten an armor pen on anything but a 1. Guess what I rolled.

Also, in my first game against the 5th ed Tyranid dex, I got tabled on turn 4. I had two drop pods, one with a Tac squad and the other with a command squad. I couldn't make the reserve roll for either of them. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't got completely thrashed up to that point, but I swear that was the closest Ive ever been to just throwing my models at the wall.

This ones about my opponent but I'm sure that yall will sympathize with him:

Tau broadsides (with stabilization system) fire at a solo Marneus Calgar. He's solo at this point because his squad broke off to assault my fire warriors... this was the end of a lost game I could'a won had I not forgotten about his bloody Shrike and the army wide fleet!

Anyway, the Broadsides fail to do any damage (4+ invulns...) aside from one wound already on the guy and decide, "You know what, we've got a shield drone. Let's go charge."

Calgar elects to use his power fists, going last. 9 S5 attacks later Calgar is dead before he can get his attacks off. Dead. As in deceased. As in my opponent lost in close combat against Tau with MARNEUS CALGAR.

I had the opposite experience in a game of fantasy... my dice LOVED me (5+ ward saves, I was making about half of them! and even more at the start) but I made a tactical blunder and lost :-/

I had a game in 3rd ed where it was IG + Daemonhunters vs Eldar. My Grandmaster was the last of his squad, having fought the Court of the Young King to death. 4 lance weapons target him, and they all hit (which is so unusual for my friend, its unbelievable.) All wound. I need to make 4 4+ saves, or I die - and I roll them all successfully. Grandmaster goes on to chop up a whole section of guys. Dice running hot, eh?

Was playing a game last week, 2v2 orks/tau vs guard/grey knights, I'm playing orks.

Getting absolutely tabled, was going to double-team a hellhound with stormboyz/vespid deep-strike but they failed to turn up at the same time and so by turn five all I had was a PK nob (fleeing) and Warboss. The only way I could save myself a totally embarrasing defeat was to declare a Waaagh, hope for a run roll of ~3 so I could assault a russ punisher and prove that I am not totally useless by blowing it up, rolled for run, got a 1!!!!!!!!!!!, needless to say 20 shots later I was slightly more embarrased...

I've pretty much become famous for getting my butt kicked for 4 turns and then winning on one event where my my opponent rolls worse than I do.

example: Necron Lord and unit charge 2 Noise Marines, miss all of their attacks, 1 Necron falls down, he rolls box cars on his morale then rolls snake eyes for his fall back and they get run down forcing him to phase out.

Lost Ku'gath in assualt first turn to 7 wounds, non power weapon.
This was a tournament game.

When I was 13, and playing in a GW store...

Open fire with nineteen empire handgunners -
- 18 fives and a six
Roll to wound zombies and vampire -
- 19 sixes!

The manager was so dumbfounded that I was given a free infantry kit for "breaking the universe".

Suffice to say, I used up all my good luck on that one game. :(

Except for ordnance rolls, I still roll a hit 8 out of ten times.

I run two flying Canonesses in my Sisters army, and any time danger threatens they are given a nice little 2+inv. save

Every single game i play, one of the two manages to roll three 1's out of her first four or so saves :( It's becoming almost a tradition.

Two fire warriors were charged by 2 ork nob bikers. The bikers buggered their attacks greatly while those 2 fire warriors killed the bikers. They then tried to test their luck with a warboss... the result was quickly decided....

I needed to roll a Nine to hit an enemy Warcaster and win the game. Five rolls in a row came up Eights, and two of them were even boosted rolls so I was rolling three dice. My dice are not merely evil and coming up all ones or something, they're down right sadistic and just torment me.

mmm, with hordes lately I have a lot of good rolls to hit. sad thing is even on boosted damage I can't seem to do more then a few points. Because of that I have left a few warbeasts alive with 1 or 2 circles left. Next turn enemy caster heals a little and My beasts are thrashed...

Luck is with the dumb, so I guess I must be pretty smart

Edit: luck is with the dumb is a dutch proverb that loses a bit in translation... ah well...

AD&D 2nd edition. My 3rd level fighter (haven't been playing for very long) attacked some mad grave-digger's dogs. 3 dogs, 4 HP each--piece of cake. My +1 longsword failed to inflict a single hit. They proceeded to roll all 20s (yes, really) and max wounds and proceeded to kill my fighter in 2 turns.... :O

Lord of Kaith wrote:AD&D 2nd edition. My 3rd level fighter (haven't been playing for very long) attacked some mad grave-digger's dogs. 3 dogs, 4 HP each--piece of cake. My +1 longsword failed to inflict a single hit. They proceeded to roll all 20s (yes, really) and max wounds and proceeded to kill my fighter in 2 turns.... :O

Excellent. In 3.5 my level.... 4? I think he was at the time, fighter Crit'ed a Manticore with his large greatsword. 3d6+... more for damage (sorry it's vague, was a while ago). Point is I killed the thing in one hit. Our DM looked at me and simply said: That was supposed to be a lot harder.

But in 40k my dice don't seem to want me to do anything other than 1's on the vehicle damage chart.

CrazyThang wrote:

Lord of Kaith wrote:AD&D 2nd edition. My 3rd level fighter (haven't been playing for very long) attacked some mad grave-digger's dogs. 3 dogs, 4 HP each--piece of cake. My +1 longsword failed to inflict a single hit. They proceeded to roll all 20s (yes, really) and max wounds and proceeded to kill my fighter in 2 turns.... :O

Excellent. In 3.5 my level.... 4? I think he was at the time, fighter Crit'ed a Manticore with his large greatsword. 3d6+... more for damage (sorry it's vague, was a while ago). Point is I killed the thing in one hit. Our DM looked at me and simply said: That was supposed to be a lot harder.

But in 40k my dice don't seem to want me to do anything other than 1's on the vehicle damage chart.

My first game of 40k, an introductory game with a GW employee, was horrible. I swear he used loaded dice, because at the end of the game (we were using the AOBR set) he absolutely murdered all of my Space Marines and I killed a sum total of 11 orks. Really.

Of course, it didn't help either that we were playing on a 2x2' table....

I've had some fun romp-arounds with the dice.

Firstly, every time my Dreadnought with Multi-Melta rolls to hit, I have never rolled higher than a 1. Never.

My Dark Elf Sorceresses cannot cast Power of Darkness with 1 dice, as every time I roll them I get 3s, not even 2s or 1s, just 3s.

My Imperial Fists will NOT PASS an armor save. Their number 1 killer is the Ork Slugga.

I've had my unit of Dark Elf Corsairs roll a series of 7 1s out of 11 dice, and picking them up for rerolls got me nothing higher than a 2.

And finally, I always seem to roll 6s on the Animosity table.

Yesterday my opponent had some horrible luck. He played empire and in this army build he had 3 wizards. They were all in the same unit which was 5 wide.
They were placed like this WWWHS.
In our 4th turn The wizard on the corner (who has lore fire) miss-casts with 2 dice. He then rolls snake-eyes again. Which ends up killing the middle wizard. The last wizard then casts and rolls 6,6,1.....1. you guessed it another misscast. My friend then follows that with a roll of 6 on the miscast table.
Needless to say but he has sworn not to go magic heavy next time. OR he will space those characters out.

Slackermagee wrote:This ones about my opponent but I'm sure that yall will sympathize with him:

Tau broadsides (with stabilization system) fire at a solo Marneus Calgar. He's solo at this point because his squad broke off to assault my fire warriors... this was the end of a lost game I could'a won had I not forgotten about his bloody Shrike and the army wide fleet!

Anyway, the Broadsides fail to do any damage (4+ invulns...) aside from one wound already on the guy and decide, "You know what, we've got a shield drone. Let's go charge."

Calgar elects to use his power fists, going last. 9 S5 attacks later Calgar is dead before he can get his attacks off. Dead. As in deceased. As in my opponent lost in close combat against Tau with MARNEUS CALGAR.

To be honest, if that ever happened to me....Well, lets just say you will need to by more Broadsides .

Dont trust orbital bombardments
had one aimed at a squad of Gretchen huddling over a objective.
Scattered full 12 landed right back on my chapter master and his 5 men strong terminator squad
and lets just say Mr Chapter Master and the terminators got terminated

(100TH POST YEAH)

Fortune: Don't leave home without it.

if I ever need a 2+ to do anything I fail.

Yhat being said I was playing my friends mech eldar with my DE lance spam list a while back in 2 turns of shooting with 18 dark lances I didn't manage to score a single glance or pen.

6 2+ saves to make with my broadsides. I made one. Lets hear it for shield drones to help make up for my inability to roll more than one dot on a die. >.<

I have the problem where my dice dislike certain armies. Whenever I am asked to make a 3+ save with my marines, I fail, but when I am asked to make 5 invuln saves and fortune got cancelled by that damn psychic hood, I make them no problem.

My dice also seem to hate my dwarfs, but love my Tomb Kings. Go figure.

Because my gaming is spotty and quite often I am standing in for someone else I don't always know what roll I have to make. It has gotten so bad that they won't tell me ahead of time because I will invariably roll under!