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...tell her to get out of my light source, I'm trying to get the lenses on the Devilfish just right. And to get me another beer. And get in the kitchen and make me some cookies. And to fire up the DVR to play SB43.

And then, I wake up........

Flipping a coin usually works.

stonefox wrote:Flipping a coin usually works.

Thanks for the tip, Mr. Harvey Dent!

Would endorsing the coin flip philosophy make you a dent-ist?

Gitzbitah wrote:Would endorsing the coin flip philosophy make you a dent-ist?

Actually, I think it makes you a Dent-ian. A dent-ist is someone who likes to inflict pain. Anyone have a link to Steve Martin's dentist song?

dietrich wrote:

stonefox wrote:Flipping a coin usually works.

Thanks for the tip, Mr. Harvey Dent!

A true normal distribution of agreement/disagreement is the very definition of compromise.

well i never expected him to like all the things that i like that would just be boring, but being able to enjoy them more than once every blue moon when he works late would be lovely. He likes guitar hero, i'm not so keen but i play when he ask's me to. would be nice for him to try some RPG's just to see if he did like them, thats all i was saying i wasn't saying he had to like what i like or vice versa.

It's all about balance. Obviously if your girlfriend has a problem with you gaming once or twice a week the relationship is not going to work out. By the same token, if you want to game every weekend and expect to go away for tournaments every three months you should resign yourself to the fact that you will die alone.

olympia wrote:It's all about balance. Obviously if your girlfriend has a problem with you gaming once or twice a week the relationship is not going to work out. By the same token, if you want to game every weekend and expect to go away for tournaments every three months you should resign yourself to the fact that you will die alone.

True words that. If it wasn't gaming it would be something else. Frankly you need the balance. When you're married you udnerstand this. When you've been married a long time you understand this even better

I won't be alone! I have all my gaming buddies at the tournies to hang out with! woot!

I have no reason to complain, my wife is very understanding with the amount of gaming that I do (which is not that much - Adepticon and a few local tournies, and that's about it).

Relationships are a give and take, not all give or take. If you let the hobby consume you, then any relationship won't last long, no matter how close you think the 2 of you are.

In this case the gaming wins. I don't respond well to demands, ultimatums or threats. The hobby is part of who I am and it is one of the few things in life I enjoy doing and one of the very few things I can do reasonably well and don't think I completely suck at. However luckily for me my wife knows I need a bit of space now and then and she knows how much the hobby means to me. So she would never make such a demand nor would I (hopefully anyway) let the relationship get to the level where such a demand was needed. Yes I can get carried away or obsessed with getting a model just right and finished sometimes.

A girlfriend who didn't know about an obessesive hobby isn't a girlfriend - that's your fault.

A girlfriend who knew about it and thought "I CAN CHANGE HIM!!!!" - that's annoying.

A wife who didn't know about an obessesive hobby isn't a wife - that's your fault.

A wife who knew about it and thought "I CAN CHANGE HIM!!!!!" - that's dangerous.

If it's your fault - grow up.
If it's annoying - end it.
If it's dangerous - put your head between your legs and kiss your butt goodbye, in the best case you're losing half your salary for the rest of your life.

The (now) wife was told before we were ever even an official couple, "If you ever give me an ultimatum to choose between you and someone or something else, I will NEVER choose you. If you love someone, you do not issue those ultimatums."

She has never tried it.

For the record, I'm a man of my word, too...


Eric

Old Man Ultramarine wrote:

Deadshane1 wrote:Do you put down your paintbrush to help her pack.....

....or do you tell her she's blocking the lightsource and you're trying to get the purity seals right?

Tell her to not let the door hit her on the on way out!

SOOO TRUE!

The best bit of advice that I heard before getting married summarized the difference between men and women.

Two men have a fight. Go out for beers that night, all is forgiven.

Two women have the same fight. They don't speak for five years.

I've never had a problem where the hobby blocked the social aspects of my life. One day I went into work early so that I could get some solid painting time. All my coworkers were amazed I had the patience to do such a thing and thought the miniatures were amazing.

Girls that I have brought over my house saw my miniatures (they are hard to miss as they are literally everywhere) either didn't comment at all or were shocked I had such "an artistic hobby". You should never hide who you are from another person you spend time with. From the get go they should know what you are like and what you are into and either compromise or just put up with it.

Anyone that wants to change who you are definitely isn't worth it. Now i'm not going to say that change is a bad thing of course some changes would are worth going through.

My current girlfriend actually think it's a "cute hobby" and a few weeks ago painted one of my random minis I had laying around. She was deeply immersed and wished she had more time to paint the mini before she had to leave. Though I am not keen on making her part of the gaming aspect of the hobby i'm glad that I have someone to paint with and talk to... though distraction/temptation could run high lol

That's just about right, in my experience.

olympia wrote:It's all about balance. Obviously if your girlfriend has a problem with you gaming once or twice a week the relationship is not going to work out. By the same token, if you want to game every weekend and expect to go away for tournaments every three months you should resign yourself to the fact that you will die alone.

Have to agree, if your other half can't allow you some "me" time, then the relationship is doomed. I game on a Monday night, then during the rest of the week I try to fit in the rest of life, freelance working, model painting, helping with grand-daughter. On a good weekend I will get do between 4 - 6 hours of extra model painting, but again not set in stone. At no time dose my wife moan at me about it. On the plus side I've got her hooked on Guitar Hero on the Wii, so when she assumes the pose... straight out to my painting desk with no feelings of guilt

Okay how about an alternative scenario: Your gaming models become animate and tell you to choose between them and your wife/girlfriend.

What do you do now?

dietrich wrote:The best bit of advice that I heard before getting married summarized the difference between men and women.

Two men have a fight. Go out for beers that night, all is forgiven.

Two women have the same fight. They don't speak for five years.

now it may just be my social circle but if a female friend and i have a fight we go out for drinks and thats the end of that, 2 of my male friends had a fight about 3 year ago and they still refuse to attend any gatering where the other "Might" be and spend 90% of the time there with our group of friends bitching about us still being friends with the other party.
highly irritating and now getting very close to neither being involved with us at all.
i have yet to hold any grudge with any person i have had a fight with, so it think your statement is inacurate

I'll cast my vote for moderation. But yeah, my wife learned very early on that ultimatum's are a great way to spin me up. I could have warned her, but sometimes women take warnings as challenges. And some of the best lessons you have to learn the hard way.

Orkeosaurus wrote:Okay how about an alternative scenario: Your gaming models become animate and tell you to choose between them and your wife/girlfriend.

What do you do now?

Call the nice men in the pretty white coats.

Roze wrote:i have yet to hold any grudge with any person i have had a fight with, so it think your statement is inacurate

No, my statement was a huge generalization, made somewhat with tongue in cheek.

I can see the 'dump her ass' approach working on Gf's, but not wives.

Personally, my friends and I schedule games 1-2 weeks in advance at our flgs. Its good for a few reasons.

#1. We have that time set aside at the shop so they know we are coming and can be set up for us when we get there.

#2. My girlfriend knows when I will be gaming. No schedule conflicts and no argument.

As far as painting goes, well I just fit that into any spare time I might have. I'm not gonna ditch my GF to paint a few plastic men. So far there have rarely been any problems between my hobby and our relationship. She has even come to a game once and has bought me some minis. In her opinion though its still that 'nerd game' that I play.

I get one game night a week and 3 two day events a year. This works pretty well. GW is a cheap hobby.

Orkeosaurus wrote:Okay how about an alternative scenario: Your gaming models become animate and tell you to choose between them and your wife/girlfriend.

What do you do now?

Tiny, plastic spears don't hold a candle to a kitchen knife.

Orkeosaurus wrote:Okay how about an alternative scenario: Your gaming models become animate and tell you to choose between them and your wife/girlfriend.

What do you do now?

"Well, you guys satisfy me, and I love you with all my black little heart but....


.....she's so soft!"

Orkeosaurus wrote:Okay how about an alternative scenario: Your gaming models become animate and tell you to choose between them and your wife/girlfriend.

What do you do now?

I stop licking my paint brush?

My GF doesn't mind that I build/paint models every night since we don't live together or anything like that. In fact she prolly likes that I'm home instead of out boozin or something. The only problem is we really only get to see each other on saturdays.. which would be fine usually, but my game club meets 1 saturday a month and she gets pissy if I say I wanna play instead since that's the only day we can hang out. So now on a game day I just play till 5 or 6 and go hang with her afterwards, or try to get a game at the store on a sunday if I'm free.

If I got an ultimatum, I'd choose the game.. just because a relationship built on an ultimatum isn't something I wanna be in. Luckily, she's not like that