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My beloved wife is pregnant too, and we're expecting a daughter for early May.

Until recently, the impact of fatherhood on my free time seemed to be far enough to keep me in the happy illusion that there wouldn't be that much changes... (I know I can be naive sometimes)

I've realised that not only would I get less time for painting and modeling, but also less space in our appartment to store models, games boxes and tools.

I had to consider a strategic retreat to our basement which had been used these last two years as some kind of private junkyard and LARP costumes and accessories storage...but after two days, it's nearly clean and ready to become my new painting and modelling lair, where I won't be affraid of models parts falling on the ground and ending in my daughter's mouth (The more I will be able to avoid taking her to the emergencies, the best it will be).

I have a 1 year old, and a 13 year old..dont ask.

As far as the baby goes, the first 3 months you should get lots of painting done as they are not that mobile, in fact they barely move. Once they are crawling though expect to get nothing done. Once they start moving you are on baby suicide watch 24/7. No matter how much you baby proof your house they will go for the one thing in the entire room that can cause them harm, and proceed to put it directly in their mouth.

Basically your hobby time is going to disappear for a few years, you may get out once a month or so to see the boys but that's about it.

Dont worry Warhammer will still be waiting for you when you have the time

Sarigar wrote:I learned to wake up at about 3 am and paint while everyone else was asleep. I had to convince myself that sleep was a crutch.

Ironman!

My hobby time got nuked, especially in that first six months or so. It gets better with time, but it'll never be the same again until I'm an old dude.

I store my hobby stuff on top of the fridge to deny access to inquisitive little beings. After he goes to bed, I can get a little painting time in at the kitchen table. Get used to painting in 1 hour increments, though.

Oh, and my gaming time was much more affected than my painting time. It's much harder to get those whole weekend afternoons off with any regularity. I probably played 2 games in eight months, although I was working on the house etc. on top of baby duties. But it's gotten a little better with time.

@ Solorg....My missus and I have the same arrangement. I get Sunday afternoons to go to the FLGS and she gets Wednesdays to chill round a friends. The rest of the week is for our son

Congratulations! Kids are much more rewarding than any hobby.

Initially expect to have zero energy left for anything other than falling asleep in front of the tv. If you are doing it right that is. If you are being all Australian about it and leaving all that child-rearing malarky up to Sheila, then YMMV

That said, by the time they are about 4 or 5 they are ready to learn to play simple games. By time they are around 6 or 7 you can get them to play wargames.

Think of it as nurturing future hobbyists...

Here's a pic of my lads enjoying a quick game of LotR at the ages of 5 and 7 a couple of years back:



And don't worry! The time'll fly by!

You'll be a-ok. I've got a 5-month old and since he's born I've managed to paint a Necromunda gang, finish some Marines, and paint nearly an entire Warriors of Chaos army. If I can do that you'll be ok. Granted you'll have to lose some sleep and not have a social life, but since you paint little plastic men then it shouldn't be a surprise.

The first 1-3 months will be the most difficult, but after that time frame if your baby is healthy and you guys have a consitent schedule then you'll be ok. Just don't get frustrated. Trust me babies know when you're annoyed (no seriously they do, be mellow).

With kids, it's not so much the time you lose (although you certainly do), it's the interruptions to your time.

e.g. I still get plenty of painting done but I have to grab 30mins or an hour here and there. No more getting everything done during the week and spending a whole day painting.

It's important (imho) to keep doing all of the things you're currently doing (hobbies, time with other half, etc). You'll have to do less but you can still do it. Giving up your lives in order to be mummy and daddy is a recipe for disaster.

Yeah gotta love your babies first.

I have a 3 year old kid, nick named pupa All I can say to you is its like flipping a coin... there are babies that always sleep well and barelly move and there are those that are a nuke bomb in your world... Mine was a very difficult baby and I had not had a good night sleep for a year and half... so speaking of hobby time in these conditions is hilarious. We were always sleep drunk arond here

But then as he grows he gets more independent... and dangerous... a couple days ago I passed the night in Hospital since he inserted small things on his nose... so you in theory have more time BUT you will have to watch over your shoulders if you dont want WWIII in your house.

Do you say - I hope I have a calm baby! I say I have no regrets by the contrary its all good, and believe me when I say nothing is more rewarding than to help them grow. Sure you will miss work deadlines or hobby times reduced to almost zero but who cares? You die and with you your work and hobbies, but something from you carries on your buglings.

Congrats mate I hope you enjoy this adventure as much as I do ehehe

OK.

I've got three children 5,4, and 2 now. But I got most of my best painting done when they were babies (2 months and on). Under 2 months and they need a bottle every hour or so.

So how do you do it?

Here was the shift in my household.

Dad is in bed by 9pm. Wife takes the last feeding and Midnight feed. (assume they are eating every 3 +/-). So the kids wake up at 3am. You feed them, burp them and back to bed. You are awake right? You've already had a good 6 hours of sleep. Time to pick up and paint. I'd paint between 3am and the next feeding. Have the baby monitor next to you and if anything happens you are up and at them for your "shift". I found this easier and less tiring then going back to bed for 2.75 hours then waking up for the 6 am feeding.

For me, painting time doesn't get easier as they get older, they want to see what you are doing...help out and by the time they are 2 or 3 you are thinking about having another.

The majority of my painting is still done between 4am and 6 am daily. Rarely do I hit a late night session.

Regards and good luck,

John

Im gonna love becoming a Dad purely for the chance that my son/daughter could become a hobby crazed loonie like myself.

Surely having a child is a joy in itself no matter the impact it has on your free time.

You'll have as much time as you make. The thing about painting as a hobby is that it is a major stress reliever. You can put on some music and paint and relax. You'll need it.

Kids are made out of rubber. They usually bounce right back. I don't know if you've ever studied the biology of human development, but the way the brain forms as a child growing up is quite remarkable. A child can survive incredible deprivation and hardship and still turn out alright. Just think of all the poor countries where the kids are near starving-- tons of them still manage to get to a nice old age.

So if the poorest of the world's poor can get their kids to survive, I think you'll have no trouble. Humans have survived and thrived in far worse conditions than you will be raising your child in. In the grand scheme of world history, your child will be one of the most blessed and privileged humans that ever lived.

Go to the swapshop forum.

[H]Baby [W]Free time.

Easy.

H.B.M.C. wrote:Go to the swapshop forum.

[H]Baby [W]Free time.

Easy.

Winz!

Really though, I have a 15 month old, and another on the way in July. I found that at the begining I didn't have alot of energy, but I did have more time.
Try to push for breastfeeding, it's healthier for everybody. Much easier than heating up a bottle, your woman just has to lay on her side, pop the tit out, and fall asleep (making sure not to roll over.) And you just have to wake up, do something like stroke her hair for 2 minutes, then fall back asleep. More sleep, more energy, less stress, healthy baby immune system!

Any way, my girl is now walking around (running and tripping around) so usually what I do is lock her in the extra room where I do my painting, with me <---IMPORTANT! That way I can keep an eye on her while she plays with her toys (which are slowly taking over my painting room.) It also gives mom a much needed break. It is possible to continue with the hobby, you just have to learn to be very good at keeping an eye on the child, while you're doing something else. Remember that uncanny gift your parents had for always knowing exactly what you were up to? It has now come full circle, and soon you will know what the child is doing before they even reach for it.

Yeah once the boy is big enough to just hang out and crawl around I'll keep him down in the den (my painting/gaming area) with me. I'll be able to keep an eye on him and he'll be able to watch me. Ideally mutually beneficial.

Just make sure that the misses and baby come first. She'll appreciate all the help she can get and you'll be better for it.

Babies also make great Monstrous Creatures for games of Apocalypse.

Lots of good stuff here. Anyone here a stay-at-home-dad, or any Moms that game who care to share their experience?

I ask because my wife and I are planning on having a child this year. Being that she just happens to have chosen a far more lucerative career than me, and I do well with kids, I'm going to be the stay-at-home parent. I'm really looking forward to this, but my questions are:

1) Will I have any more paint time than if I was working? Sure I won't have a "job", but from what I hear, kids are a full-time job and then some, and of course there's also housework, etc...

2) How do you full-time parents find time to paint? They have to nap sometime, but I have a feeling I will want to nap then also.

3) Anybody have any luck finding folks to game with during the daytime? As I have a house and a game table, this is an option I was thinking about.

Congratulations to those new and expecting Parents.

From my own experience [my Little Bean was 1 just before Chrimbo] you will have very little free time in the first three months while baby is getting bedded in to his/her new environment.

Unfortunately sleep is a rare comoditity during this period because of the regular feeding times and help your Mrs will need [particularly if she has a C-Section], so I would mostly write this period off as hobby time. I actually read allot more though as I realised that baby would be up every half an hour through the night and ended up just reading between allot of feeds [Watchmen and Dark Heresy books since you ask!]. So you might want to stock up on hobby related material.

At some point around 3 months my little girl started sleeping through the night - its the strangest thing when you are used to being up most of the night and then one night without warning you shut your eyes at 11PM and open them at 7AM with not inteription. I leapt out of bed to check she was still breathing in her basket, pretty scarey stuff!

After that it is all about routines [damm I sound like one of those baby books!]. Once your baby is into a feeding routine, and then a bath/bed routine as they get older you will find that you have time to do things.

Funnily enough this is one of the things that brought me to Dakka. Having been out of the gaming/modelling hobby for a few years and having read lots of gaming related books during the first 3 months I started to find that I was allot more interested in picking up minis again so started to log on when I first had time. It might only have been less than an hour at night but it got into the routine too and now over a year on I am setting up my own hobby area [see P Blog!], you just have to be patient.

One word of warning though, when you go back to work and get home at night and get handed your baby as soon as you get in the door and the have to feed them, bath them and get them off to sleep, do not at any point be tempted to say [you might think it but do not say it] you need some time for yourself/to play with pew pews because "she has been at home all day doing nothing but look after the baby" This is a recipe for losing at the very least bedroom privalidge for an extended length of time or you knackers, which equates to much the same thing!

Eilif wrote:Lots of good stuff here. Anyone here a stay-at-home-dad, or any Moms that game who care to share their experience?

I ask because my wife and I are planning on having a child this year. Being that she just happens to have chosen a far more lucerative career than me, and I do well with kids, I'm going to be the stay-at-home parent. I'm really looking forward to this, but my questions are:

1) Will I have any more paint time than if I was working? Sure I won't have a "job", but from what I hear, kids are a full-time job and then some, and of course there's also housework, etc...

2) How do you full-time parents find time to paint? They have to nap sometime, but I have a feeling I will want to nap then also.

3) Anybody have any luck finding folks to game with during the daytime? As I have a house and a game table, this is an option I was thinking about.

1) Less time for the first few years

2) I may get a hour or 2 a day but for the most part when they are napping you have to catch up on housework, laundry, bills, everything else

3) Weekends you may find some early players, also those unlucky enough to have a night shift may be up for a morning or late afternoon game.

Others have said it and I'll back it up, its all about planning. Routine works for kids and hobbies. Set a bed time, stick to it, then you can get time in for the wife and other things.

Just remember, other people do it, and have for many years, so you can too.

Only problem I suffer from is my kids are now teens, both play, so does the wife, so now I have 4 plastic crack habits to feed and only 1 income..... Ouch.

Congratulations first of all.

As others have said you'll probably be surprised what you can still fit in.

The first few months will fly by anyways, also for the first few months if the baby farts the wrong way you'll be considering a mad rush to a&e, but that seems the norm for the first baby.

Apart from what others have said, the one thing I would suggest is either having your painting area in a seperate room, or cordened off if you have no spare room.

I now use five parts of what was the eight sided baby playpen as a indoor fence to cordon off a section of the living room, than neither of my boys, now 6 and 4, would try to enter. It even has its own gate, hehe.

Of course it gets easier as they get older, and already my six year old is eying up figures and potential armies. Of course we might be mad, as we are planning to start the cycle again, going to have one more child within the next three years.

Flashman wrote:Ok, my wife and I are expecting what should be (according to the ultrasound woman) a baby boy late May/early June. Whilst this will of course be a very happy occassion (if all goes well, touch wood), I find myself pondering what time will be left for hobbies,

Gratz, better finish stuff now, before the kid pops out. You'll have far less time afterwards if you do any actual parenting stuff.
____

notprop wrote:One word of warning though, when you go back to work and get home at night and get handed your baby as soon as you get in the door and the have to feed them, bath them and get them off to sleep, do not at any point be tempted to say [you might think it but do not say it] you need some time for yourself/to play with pew pews because "she has been at home all day doing nothing but look after the baby"

I'll second this point. You can be tempted to say it, but you really shouldn't actually open your mouth and let those words out...

As a father with a 3-yr old and a 1.5-yr old, my method is to do my painting and modeling during my lunchbreak at work (granted, it helps that I work from home, but I've known others to keep their paints and models in their office for working on them on their breaks). I'm still working on the "getting out to actually game" part of the equation, though...

I took a full year off the hobby

Alrighty time for me to chime in. I am a father of two, my baby girl (not so much a baby anymore) will be three in June, my son will be one in March. I have to pick and choose my "hobby time" very carefully, i try to get them both down for a nap at the same time (a lot harder than it sounds) then i get 45min-1hr15min of paint/hobby time. I have a wi-fi labtop so I can be downstairs next to the play room and watch them at the same time. My daughter has started "helping" me paint my old figures that i've randomly acumulated but never did anything with.
believe it or not, the biggest change in gaming/hobby habits happened after my son was born. I've only gotten back into things in the last month or so. With my daughter it wasn't that hard... cuz its was just her, naps were easy, bed time is easy.
I do most of my painting at night when everyone is asleep. thats a great tip.
I recommend a break for the first couple of months, till you get the wee one on a regular sleep/feeding schedule, then it becomes much easier to work in the hr here or there for painting.
My wife and I have an agreement, I get Sunday evenings to go play games with the guys, and not have to worry about the kids/the house. She gets one other day/night durning the week to go sit and drink coffee and gossip with her friends at Barnes and Noble.
When it comes to gaming and family you have to compromise. Just understand that your projects will take much longer to finish due to lack of time, and ability to purchase models.
Congrats on the baby!! Its truly is the best experience i have ever had in my life.

Well im not a dad (my mum would kill me) but i'd like to say: CONGRATULATIONS!

You WILL have less hobby time but you WILL NOT care, as being a father is, quite simply, awesome.

An awesome responsibility and an awesome joy.

(Said as a father of 2 girls!)

What Alpharius said! It is a joy. I'm having so much fun watching my daughter grow up, kids really are amazing little problem solvers.

Also

One word of warning though, when you go back to work and get home at night and get handed your baby as soon as you get in the door and the have to feed them, bath them and get them off to sleep, do not at any point be tempted to say [you might think it but do not say it] you need some time for yourself/to play with pew pews because "she has been at home all day doing nothing but look after the baby" This is a recipe for losing at the very least bedroom privalidge for an extended length of time or you knackers, which equates to much the same thing!

This is so true it's not even funny. I would put myself in the doghouse so many times for doing just this, until I learned a trick. When I get off work, I hang out in the parking lot and have a smoke/ listen to music for about 10 minutes. That way when I get home, I've already had some "deprogramming" time from work, and I can immediately take control of the baby when I walk in the door.

First off, welcome to the club! My son is 16 months old now.

All the other posters have told you the right thing - you will find a way to make your hobby time fit your family time. Every child has their quirks and you will learn the ones that your has.

For the first few months you could have a lot of time as long as you can handle the lack of sleep. I never had a problem with lack of sleep so I actually got a lot done the first few months. Once the baby becomes mobile then you will have to watch them carefully and your hobby time will drop. Painting at night wasn't an option for me so my hobby time went to almost zero from months 4-15. I was able to get a little done during the afternoon nap, but I had to plan carefully and not start anything that I couldn't pause or finish within an hour - the morning nap was when I got to eat and do housework.

A painting station helps a lot. I find that the best thing is not that it is portable, but that is helps keep me organized and ready to go.

Edit:
There has been a lot of talk of the hobby aspects. The gaming aspect is important too. Find other gamer parents. Not only because they can give you advice as well, but there will usually be some non-gaming spouses than can be tasked with babysitting while the others play.

Congratulations! BUT.

New or expectant father make me sick, creating the babies where the fun is not having they!!!!!!!!!!, (I've, or more accurately my wife's had three).

You will need to rethink everything, from scheduling your free time (what free time), sleep, love make (OH Yes, that ends), general duties and even work.

Yes they can be rewarding, but they do suck up time, money and effort. My advice is for you and your wife to work together to ensure that you both have time for your interest and friend and time together.

And there is light at the end of the tunnel, they do eventually leave home, HA HA mine are, only one to go.


ONLY KIDDING (sort of) it the best game in town

Congratulations! And give your lovely wife a big kiss from me and my misses. (I was forced to write this last line)

First off, Congrats As other people have mentioned, try to get 5 min done here and there and it'll add up.

Lint wrote:When I get off work, I hang out in the parking lot and have a smoke/ listen to music for about 10 minutes. That way when I get home, I've already had some "deprogramming" time from work, and I can immediately take control of the baby when I walk in the door.

Just have to ask, whats your backup plan/excuse in case the missus sees you do that?
Not sure about you, but I'd have some explaining to do
Edit : Nevermind this! (Read that you did it at the parking lot around your home, not at the office. Too fast to quote/reply and/or too tired )

However, it does sound like a good idea. I'd also suggest just going to the store and buy some groceries on the way back from work. Don't know about all you guys but I don't find that stressful, so you can just relax and buy whatevers needed, it should be appreciated back home