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ineptus astartes wrote:Your misses? You mean your wife/girlfriend?

I think you meant 'Missus'

Yeah, I believe so, english is my second language, so I have a few misses here and there, but yeah, I have a fiancé, she's my world.

OK
...
boy, am I tired, I have this weird feeling of wanting to go to sleep at 6:42 PM. Coffee time.

ineptus astartes wrote:@Troy:

I am damn sure I am not normal.

I have ADHD, Dyslexia, Dysgraphia, an OCD, some stuff I forgot the name of.

I write Spongebob Squarepants Fanfiction for christ sakes!

warranted, all of them involve gunfights, murder mysteries and incredibly heroic things like that (why did Dennis not just shoot them when he had the chance?)

You sound like my neighbor across the street (ADHD), the one next door (Dyslexia), and my wife (OCD).

And don't be sdissing the awesome power of Spongebob. One Barnacle to find them, and in the ocean bind them!

Oh good, another fan 'peace brotha'

My SB fics are 'Hunting the Wolf' and 'Devil's Anvil' just so you know.

were do you post these stories?

on topic:about how old do you think your dad is?

(FanFiction.net, the link is in my sig, WARORK's stuff is the best out there. he goes by 'H4WX)

now lets get back on topic.

lord commissar klimino wrote:were do you post these stories?

on topic:about how old do you think your dad is?

In his late 40's early 50's, I guess.

Ineptus, a coffee doesn't sound too bad, I might go get one myself.

I also want to thank everyone for their help and support.

No problem, 'A friend in need is a friend indeed' I think that's how it goes.

If your Dad wasn't around when you grew up, you'll have picked up an odd trait or two.
Everyone does, but some things are often known to contribute, such as single-parent upbringings.

Not that I know firsthand how these things go, but it's likely to be an interesting meeting.
Try not to get too defensive, or to point blame. You have a fiancé, what more could a Dad want?

Grandkids.

So much teenage angst in this thread.

SO?!?! WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?!!?!

EXCREMENT!!!!!

Ahem, sorry.

I would have thought the meaning was clear?

ineptus astartes wrote:Grandkids.

teeth?

Da Boss wrote:Ineptus: You're better off in life if you don't identify yourself with reference to "conditions".

It's pretty usual as a teenager (and even into your twenties) to be defining yourself with relation to your peers, so I won't bother contesting your statements about normality. But I will say that most of the people you consider normal probably have their own foibles and oddities that you do not see.

Remilia: Since you know nothing about your Dad, and you are a transvestite, it's probably pretty sensible to be nervous about it. Does your Dad know you are a transvestite? It may be that he has no problem with it, equally, he may strongly disapprove. You should consider carefully whether meeting him or sharing that information with him is likely to make both of you happier or unhappier.

Best advice so far, maybe you should warn him in advance that you're a transvestite or just not bring it up and dress in some boy's. Do what you feel is best though.

Da Boss wrote:Remilia: Since you know nothing about your Dad, and you are a transvestite, it's probably pretty sensible to be nervous about it. Does your Dad know you are a transvestite? It may be that he has no problem with it, equally, he may strongly disapprove. You should consider carefully whether meeting him or sharing that information with him is likely to make both of you happier or unhappier.

To further touch on this:

You seem to bring up the transvestism thing constantly. Even when it isn't even tangentially related to the conversation topic. Are you always cross-dressing or is it something that you only do once in a while? If it's the latter you could always, you know, not be dressed as a woman when you meet the guy for the first time if you're worried about his reaction.

If it's the former, I mean, be who you want to be and all. Either he'll accept you or he won't; that's on him. The only reason I'm saying this is because it seems that you're concerned about it.

Albatross wrote:So much teenage angst in this thread.

Thank you.

I was trying to explain the glut of derisive feelings that reading this thread was inducing; this summed it up nicely.

ineptus astartes wrote:I think you meant 'Missus'

Did you really just attempt to correct someone else's grammar?

Monster Rain wrote:

Albatross wrote:So much teenage angst in this thread.

Thank you.

I was trying to explain the glut of derisive feelings that reading this thread was inducing; this summed it up nicely.

Agreed.

Monster Rain wrote:Did you really just attempt to correct someone else's grammar?

No, it was his spelling.

htj wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:Did you really just attempt to correct someone else's grammar?

No, it was his spelling.

"Misses" and "Missus" are two different words.

Monster Rain wrote:

htj wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:Did you really just attempt to correct someone else's grammar?

No, it was his spelling.

"Misses" and "Missus" are two different words.

Indeed. He had spelt one incorrectly and so it resembled the other.

*deep breath*

ineptus astartes wrote:SO?!?! WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?!!?!

My advice:

Never forget who you are, for surely the world won’t. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.

htj wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:

htj wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:Did you really just attempt to correct someone else's grammar?

No, it was his spelling.

"Misses" and "Missus" are two different words.

Indeed. He had spelt one incorrectly and so it resembled the other.

*deep breath*

You can't possibly know that. I guy like remilia probably has a straight up harem; he could easily have been referring to multiple young women.

(gasp)

Back on topic, now? Take the last word in our little exchange here, if it please you m'lord..

I will concede you the last word, sir, with all respect and honour given.

Instead, I shall respond to this:

Monster Rain wrote:You seem to bring up the transvestism thing constantly. Even when it isn't even tangentially related to the conversation topic. Are you always cross-dressing or is it something that you only do once in a while? If it's the latter you could always, you know, not be dressed as a woman when you meet the guy for the first time if you're worried about his reaction.

It would seem fair to assume that tranvesticism is something that is an integral part of remilia's character. (Is this fair to say, remilia?) If so, it would be disingenuous to suggest otherwise to him. I agree that it would be a good idea to present oneself in a more neutral fashion on the first meeting, in order to oil the wheels of such a delicate situation, but it would be my advice to at least bring it up during the meeting.

And, I will say this directly to remilia as it seems more proper: This is a man who abandoned your family when you were at a very young age. He did not raise you, and you owe him nothing. You are who you are and if that disappoints him then it must be his cross to bear, not yours. Respect yourself above all things, the onus is on him to make amends. Good luck in this.

htj wrote:And, I will say this directly to remilia as it seems more proper: This is a man who abandoned your family when you were at a very young age. He did not raise you, and you owe him nothing. You are who you are and if that disappoints him then it must be his cross to bear, not yours. Good luck in this.

Indeed. AS the Wife would say, "he's not your father, he's your sperm donor."

<text redacted; inappropriately rude. Broadcast mode active: If you don't care to read someone else's posts, you can make use of the "Ignore" feature; responding to them emotionally will likely cause you trouble>

Automatically Appended Next Post:

dogma wrote:

ineptus astartes wrote:SO?!?! WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?!!?!

My advice:

Never forget who you are, for surely the world won’t. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.

Jeezus christ. can't I post up some sarcasm once in a while?

ineptus astartes wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:

ineptus astartes wrote:I think you meant 'Missus'

Did you really just attempt to correct someone else's grammar?

Yes, I did, now stop acting like a troll...oh, wait, thats right. you are a troll. you seem to hate me in particular, now feth off, jerk.

And yet, I never insulted you. I just thought that a post correcting someone else's spelling/grammar that wasn't punctuated properly was amusing, that's all.

Your total lack of consideration for forum rules (spamming, flaming, complete disregard for basic grammar) don't make me hate you, but I do feel compelled to attempt to help you correct the error of your ways. Take a deep breath, friend.

ineptus astartes wrote:
Jeezus christ. can't I post up some sarcasm once in a while?

That was aimed at the thread more than you.

Though, regarding sarcasm: Sure, once we get to know you we'll even pick up on it.

htj wrote:And, I will say this directly to remilia as it seems more proper: This is a man who abandoned your family when you were at a very young age. He did not raise you, and you owe him nothing. You are who you are and if that disappoints him then it must be his cross to bear, not yours. Respect yourself above all things, the onus is on him to make amends. Good luck in this.

This is true.

I know it's probably a little more complicated on an emotional level, but this person basically is a stranger. You've gotten along for this long without him, right?

Remilia, be careful if you do meet this man. As others have said, this is not your "dad", this someone claiming to have provided the sperm then bailed. His sudden desire to come back into your life in this way indicates he probably needs something, be that money, emotional support, forgiveness, whatever. The motivation is going to be something HE needs... if it was about you, he would have been there all along.

Just be very careful, OK? Meet in a public place. I know he has your address, since a letter was sent, but ensure there are other people around when (if) you meet him. Have a friend there with you, and meet in public. Make the first meeting short, over coffee or something. You will need to break the ice a bit and you both will need to understand what this all means.

Also, this could all be a scam. Here's long lost daddy-o, and oh, so sad, he needs a couple hundred bucks for an operation. Or maybe just needs a place to stay for a while (then can rob you blind). Anyone who has heard (even tangentially) about your situation could easily manufacture this sort of scam. There are people who milk lonely old people of all their savings; there is no depth that scammers won't sink.

Seriously, be careful.

As far as your appearance, be you. This person is nothing to you but a source of DNA, if that is even true. Don't compromise who you are for a total stranger. You owe him nothing. If he freaks out, that is why you must be in public... walk away and call security or police.

Hopefully this will be a chance to get to know your father. Who knows, he may become your Dad over time. I've said before, but again, please just be careful.

I wish you well and best of luck! Update the thread when you decide what you will do, OK?

Anything that I would have mentioned has already been said.

I wonder if your father is more worried about meeting you than you meeting him. I think the fact that he sent you a letter may indicate the amount of guilt/regret he must be feeling. Perhaps he fears you hate him. Or maybe he is desperate. Who knows.

Be yourself anyway. As tenuous as an internet forum member's support is, you still have mine anyway. I hope it goes well.