father issues...

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**remilia_scarlet**

Well, I'm always up late, and I'm pretty much a NEET( not enough entertainment), watching anime, playing games and the such. Anyways, I was just looking at the mail to pass the time, and I found a letter from russia, so I opened it up, and to my suprise, it's from a man who says he's my father, anyways, the letter is pretty specific about him wanting to see his only son, and how he thinks I've become a good man, I mean, I try to do the right thing, but, I'm afraid that if my father sees me like this, I'll disappoint him, or he'll hate me, so my question is what do I do?

**Toastedandy**

Become a coal miner.

I honestly doubt he will hate you unless he is a stereotypical anti capitalist Russian. He obviously wants to see you, as long as you don't show up wearing a cosplay outfit, I'd say you would get along grand.

**remilia_scarlet**

Toastedandy wrote:Become a coal miner.

I honestly doubt he will hate you unless he is a stereotypical anti capitalist Russian. He obviously wants to see you, as long as you don't show up wearing a cosplay outfit, I'd say you would get along grand.

That was clever, coal miner, it made me giggle.

To be honest, I never met my father, my mama always said he left before I was born, so I guess I'm just a little anxious.

Thanks though

**Medium of Death**

If you don't 'live up' to his expectations why should you care? He isn't or won't be a major influencing factor on your life.

**remilia_scarlet**

I know, you're right, it's just that growing up, I never had a male role model or father figure(kind of the reason I am the way I am now), it was just me, my mama and my sisters, it would be nice to have a full family, like you see on tv, but, you're right, it really shouldn't matter.

**Toastedandy**

Even if he wasn't a major influence, he is still your dad. If your the only male heir to him, you are the one to carry on the proud name of _scarlet.

**remilia_scarlet**

Toastedandy, you're on the money today, that's twice you've made me giggle, you make a good therapist.

But, you're right, he is my father, and I am his son, even if I'm different.

**ineptus astartes**

Make sure he is your real dad and not a serial killer first. if he is, GET A JOB, YOU BUM!

Spruce yourself up, clean your home and put on some good clothes.

I know what you mean though, I do know my dad, but he is so distant to me, he might as well be in russia.

**Lukus83**

Look at the bright side...maybe he's loaded and is gonna offer up a huge inheritance.

**Grabzak Dirtyfighter**

That seems pretty common ineptus, personally I live 20 minutes from my father and we might see each other twice a year if one of those times is accidental.

Remilia if your father has been gone your whole life you should probably meet him for YOUR sake, not for his. He made a decision to not get to know you a long time ago and I wouldn't put too much of your hopes into having a relationship with him. It would be nice if it happened but you shouldn't expect it cause your just setting yourself up for disappointment.

**remilia_scarlet**

Yeah, ineptus, I definitely will, kinda scary that it could happen.

I'm definitley going to clean up, wear some nice dresses, get my hair done at the salon, and cook a nice meal.

As for the thing about fathers, I remember seeing on tv once that 90% of the time, it's the father that leaves, so I understand what you mean, it's not fun being distant from your family, I've grown distant from most of mine.

Automatically Appended Next Post:
You're right grabzak, I need to do this for me, not him, and if he's an ass, I'm not losing anything.

Automatically Appended Next Post:

Lukus83 wrote:Look at the bright side...maybe he's loaded and is gonna offer up a huge inheritance.

He could be, he was an officer during the soviet era, and my mama always said he was a penny pincher, so he could have a small fortune. I wish I had a rich family though.

**ineptus astartes**

Automatically Appended Next Post:
yeah, I guess.

@grabzak: you seem to mistake me for an adult

, naw, I am 15, I live with both my parents, the live-in maid and my older causins so I am genarally 'left alone' so to speak.

The point with my dad is he never realy tried do do anything that really endeared me to him, we threw a baseball around at the YMCA once or thrice, but that's about it. he is working 24/7 and when he is not...I take after him physacly, but my 'disposition' comes from the Norman side (my mom's side) I tend to be cracking jokes, working on writing of my own and keeping a messy room. he tends to work on poetry, his own writing and stuff for events in nepal. so we are not really much alike, that tends to depress me, 100% of my friends have dads who are all active and stuff...so I get kind of touchy on the 'dad' subject.

So, Remilia, be outgoing, act like you would want your son to act like and everything should be fine

**Troy**

remilia_scarlet wrote:Well, I'm always up late, and I'm pretty much a NEET( not enough entertainment), watching anime, playing games and the such. Anyways, I was just looking at the mail to pass the time, and I found a letter from russia, so I opened it up, and to my suprise, it's from a man who says he's my father, anyways, the letter is pretty specific about him wanting to see his only son, and how he thinks I've become a good man, I mean, I try to do the right thing, but, I'm afraid that if my father sees me like this, I'll disappoint him, or he'll hate me, so my question is what do I do?

Get an axe, get a leather jockstrap, some mushrooms, and go A Viking?
Wait, is he a Russian oligarch billionaire? If so, say hello to your new paycheck, er Dad.
Alternatively do you have any bo stick skills?

**ineptus astartes**

Hey, man, this person is meeting his/her (don't know your gender) father for the first time, show some respect.

(told you I get touchy on the subject)

**remilia_scarlet**

Thanks ineptus.

I dunno troy, I grew accustomed to being the clerk of a costume shop

But, it's worth a shot, it's not like I'm going to break a nail or anything. I doubt my dad is rich, but money isn't important, love is.

Automatically Appended Next Post:
Well, ineptus, I'm a guy, but I look and dress like a woman.

**Troy**

remilia_scarlet wrote:
But, it's worth a shot, it's not like I'm going to break a nail or anything. I doubt my dad is rich, but money isn't important, love is.

Poverty changed my view on that years ago.

Automatically Appended Next Post:

ineptus astartes wrote:Hey, man, this person is meeting his/her (don't know your gender) father for the first time, show some respect.

(told you I get touchy on the subject)

You're on a board called Dakka Dakka. Seriously.

**lord commissar klimino**

to be honest i don't like my family.at all. so i cant give much advice on the issue. but a few things:

A) check and make sure he is the real deal.
B) be yourself.
C) don't take crap from him. (both metaphorically and literally

)
D) don't expect to much. don't expect to little.
E) meet him only if you truly want to.

**ineptus astartes**

Yes, but LCK, you openly played a character who murdered his family in one of our RPGs

Tell him to take it with a grain (mound) of salt.

**lord commissar klimino**

ineptus astartes wrote:Yes, but LCK, you openly played a character who murdered his family in one of our RPGs

yes. yes i did.

**ineptus astartes**

...
...
...You are a strange, strange little texan.

**remilia_scarlet**

Well klimino, I believe you've got a point, I'm just afraid of the "ew, my son is a transvestite, why god, why?" situation, I'm not exactly normal.

**lord commissar klimino**

@indeptus:awwww.thanks! ^^

**ineptus astartes**

remilia_scarlet wrote:Well klimino, I believe you've got a point, I'm just afraid of the "ew, my son is a transvestite, why god, why?" situation, I'm not exactly normal.

Well, it depends, if he is like my uncle forest (I really hope he is not) then he would flip out.

If he is prepared to just live with it and accept it, dislikes or not (which is what a good father does) then you are in luck.

**Troy**

remilia_scarlet wrote:Well klimino, I believe you've got a point, I'm just afraid of the "ew, my son is a transvestite, why god, why?" situation, I'm not exactly normal.

When you get older, you'll realize no one is "normal," yet - absent serial killers et al - we all really are.

**remilia_scarlet**

You're right ineptus, he'll just have to... wait for it... *puts on shades*... deal with it.

**lord commissar klimino**

remilia_scarlet wrote:Well klimino, I believe you've got a point, I'm just afraid of the "ew, my son is a transvestite, why god, why?" situation, I'm not exactly normal.

im not normal. and who care about his opinion,he left when you were a kid,he gets no opinion. if he wanted you to e in his image ha should've stayed.

**ineptus astartes**

@Troy:

I am damn sure I am not normal.

I have ADHD, Dyslexia, Dysgraphia, an OCD, some stuff I forgot the name of.

I write Spongebob Squarepants Fanfiction for christ sakes!

warranted, all of them involve gunfights, murder mysteries and incredibly heroic things like that (why did Dennis not just shoot them when he had the chance?)

**remilia_scarlet**

Troy wrote:
remilia_scarlet wrote:Well klimino, I believe you've got a point, I'm just afraid of the "ew, my son is a transvestite, why god, why?" situation, I'm not exactly normal.

When you get older, you'll realize no one is "normal," yet - absent serial killers et al - we all really are.

my misses is real happy for me, but, I'm just anxious, when I turned 19, I realized everyone is different, but, like you said, we're all normal, it just doesn't feel that way.

**Da Boss**

Ineptus: You're better off in life if you don't identify yourself with reference to "conditions".

It's pretty usual as a teenager (and even into your twenties) to be defining yourself with relation to your peers, so I won't bother contesting your statements about normality. But I will say that most of the people you consider normal probably have their own foibles and oddities that you do not see.

Remilia: Since you know nothing about your Dad, and you are a transvestite, it's probably pretty sensible to be nervous about it. Does your Dad know you are a transvestite? It may be that he has no problem with it, equally, he may strongly disapprove. You should consider carefully whether meeting him or sharing that information with him is likely to make both of you happier or unhappier.

**ineptus astartes**

Your misses? You mean your wife/girlfriend?

I think you meant 'Missus'