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My brother and I had an interesting idea for an unusual game. Essentially you write a legal army list for your opponent and then play the game as normal. The object of the game would be to write the worst possible list for your opponent to be forced to use. Fill the list with all the pointless upgrades and worthless units as you can. The standard force organization and any other codex rules apply. We will use the Standard Missions from the Big Red Book. We would allow a ten point leeway so legal forces range from 1990 to 2010 pts.

There is only one unit that is forbidden to take and that is the summoned lesser demons from Codex: Chaos Space Marines. With these you could simply not buy any icons for the force and then you would be left with 2 sets of 5 CSM and a blank Chaos Lord. I can not think of any other units that you could not deploy, but any found would be forbidden as well.

After we find the worst army lists possible we plan to fight the battle and put up a battle report as well. We will be using many "counts as" models so do not let that limit your choices.

A popular and entertaining one is to just max out an Ork army with 180 gretchin. If you take Mad Dok Grotsnik as your HQ, you can give them all bionic bodies for 5 points a man or so. This way you get an entire army of near-useless troops with 5+ invulnerable saves.

I just want to start the conversation with a few ideas of my own.

1. Codex: Blood Angels

HQ) Captain w/ 2x Storm Shields

Troops) 22x Death Company with 2x Thunder Hammers

Troops) 5x Scouts w/ Combat Blades and Camo Cloaks

Total 1990 pts

In this list you can only control the 5 scouts and the Captain. The 22 death company have rage and they have no guns as well. All you need is one unit that can move quickly and you can sent the death company for a jog around the board. then just kill the captain and the scouts.


2. Codex: Space Marines

HQ) 2x Captain with 2x storm shields and a bunch of other stuff

Troops) 5x scouts with combat blades, camo cloaks, Sargent with melta bombs and Teleport Homer

Troops) 5x scouts with combat blades, camo cloaks, Sargent Tellion

Fast) 3 groups of 10x Vanguard Veterans, Sargent with power weapon and storm shield. all other with 2x storm shields each.

Total 1990 pts

In a battle against bad armies, power weapons are not likely to be found so 3+ save and a 3++ save will not really help the vanguard. you end up with a small model count and most of those models have no weapons.

Although those SM ones are pretty terrible, and will probably win in the "worst" -

Necrons:
Deciever
10 Pariahas
20 Warriors with fields
28 Scarabs with fields
9 Tomb Spyders with particle thing

2003 points... kill 15 warriors and they phase

I don't have a "terrible list" to contribute, but I'd like to say this is one of the most amusing and fascinating ideas I've seen in a while.

tau list

Space pope.
205
shas'o. command and control node, failsafe detonator, iridium plates, drone controller, ass.
130
gun drone squadron x8
96
gun drone squadron x8
96
gun drone squadron x8
96
fire warriors x6, grenades, carbines.
84
sniper drone team x3
240
stealth suits x6
180
stealth suits x6
180
stealth suits x6
180
fire warriors x6, grenades, carbines.
84
fire warriors x6, grenades, carbines.
84
fire warriors x6, grenades, carbines.
84
fire warriors x6, grenades, carbines.
84
fire warriors x6, grenades, carbines, d fish, seeker missiles.
84
skyray, sms, 2x seeker missiles.
165
2004pts.

crap that was hard!

Ok Ouze!

foot slogging fire-warriors with range 18 guns, a xv8 suit with no weapons, space pope!, seeker missiles that cant be fired, stealth suits without their one advantageous configuration, the worst fast attack choice (imho), the sky-ray is the only semi-ok thing.

Hey, if I could be so presumptuous - can people who post terrible lists explain why they are terrible? For example, everyone so far has explained what the problem is - an army of gretchin with 5+ invulnerable save, 2003 points of necrons that phase out when they lose 15 warriors - but those amused me because I own both codexes. However, there are a lot of codexes out and with some of the more esoteric choices, people maybe might not know why they suck so bad. I didn't even know what space pope was until last week.

You really don't need to try too hard just download the DH codex and then try and do a GK list trust me no matter how hard you try to make a terrible list it won't be as bad as trying to make a good one

The interesting issue is in the meta game. For example, grey knights have a hard time competing against mech armies as they do not have good anti-vehicle weapons. Against a foot army though they have good mobile firepower and decent close comat. It is easy to make a list that could not beat a competitive Mech Guard list, but then remember the list you write will face a bad list as well.

About the Tau list posted
If you can take a XV8 suit with no weapons, why not take a bunch of them? I thought is was mandatory to take at least one weapon.

Although you make a good point, in a GK army you are going to be outnumbered at least 3 to 1 and with a lack of transports that's going to mean that even if you are facing an all foot army they are going to out shoot you and then overwhelm you if you do manage to assault.

you know what to do against hoard army with GKs? Holocaust!, works every time

... though, I only use them as allies, so what would I know?


also
Master of the Forge with Thunder Hammer
130

10 Scouts with Combat Blades, Camo Cloaks and a Teleport Homer
185 x2

Vanguard Veteran Squad with 2 Storm Shields each and Jump Packs
625 x2

Techmarine with Thunder Hammer
80 x3

1990


44 guys on the board? is that too many?

Justicar Alaric wrote:<Insert Melissiaesque rant here about how some codex is under powered>

Ha. Haha. Hahaha.

-------------------------------

On topic, it would probably be an army that can take armory equipment on sgts, and elite choices.

I would imagine maxed out inquisitorial storm troopers with veterans with useless upgrades would take the bill for troops. Coming around 200 each?

Then three inquisitors with useless upgrades and useless retinues for somewhere around 180 a pop?

Then an inquisitor lord with useless junk.

To top it all off, get their chimeras with maximum upgrades, it will be expensive, with one firing point.

Chaos Lord.
5 Chaos Space Marines.
5 Chaos Space Marines.
135 Lesser Daemons.

Can I haz winz?

Aww, but the OP said no.

Why disqualify it... it's a legal list.....

All walking (ie no transports) Dark Eldar.

don_mondo wrote:All walking (ie no transports) Dark Eldar.

Don't forget to not give them any dark lances.

Bunch of Flash Gits with more Dakka and Blastas....will get hot! 75% of time and blow self up.

Here's one that I made a while ago, basically a CSM list intended to kill itself.


HQ - Fabius Bile - 160pts

HQ - Chaos Lord - MoK, daemon weapon, plasma pistol - 155pts

Elites - Chaos Dreadnought - Plasma Cannon, CCW, Heavy Flamer - 110pts

Elites - Chaos Dreadnought - Plasma Cannon, CCW, Heavy Flamer - 110pts

Elites - Chaos Dreadnought - Plasma Cannon, CCW, Heavy Flamer - 110pts

Troops - 10 Chaos Space Marines - 'Enhanced Warriors', 2x Plasma Gun. Aspiring Champion with Plasma Pistol - 240pts

Troops - 10 Chaos Space Marines - 'Enhanced Warriors', 2x Plasma Gun. Aspiring Champion with Plasma Pistol - 240pts

Troops - 10 Chaos Space Marines - 'Enhanced Warriors', 2x Plasma Gun. Aspiring Champion with Plasma Pistol - 240pts

Fast Attack - 3 Chaos Bikers - 2x Plasma Guns. Aspiring Champion with Plasma Pistol - 155pts

Fast Attack - 3 Chaos Bikers - 2x Plasma Guns. Aspiring Champion with Plasma Pistol - 155pts

Fast Attack - 7 Chaos Spawn - 300pts

Heavy Support - 5 Chaos Havocs - 4x Plasma Gun. Aspiring Champion with Plasma Pistol - 165pts


This has had a few changes from the original, but is very slow, equipped with a mass (gets hot) of plasma weapons, spawn which are inevitably crap, overpriced kill-self bikers, enhanced warriors that could kill themselves and dreads that will plasma and bbq your own troops. Oh and a Khorne Lord to kick his own face in for good measure.

Platoon 1
w/ 1x non upgraded platoon command, 5x conscript guard squads

Platoon 2
Same as before but with one less squad

Lord Commissar

Primis Psyker


Crapton of ws/bs 3 sv 5+ conscripts with no heavy weapons. Because of unit consolidation and ordinance weapon could probably destroy half the army with one shot. Not to mention flamers and plasma guns.

I don't have my codex with me, but I imagine a tyranid list for this would focus on pyrovores and ripper swarms. Take as few synapse as you can (can you take a list with none?) as ripper swarms take wounds out of synapse range and can take upgrades that are overcosted. Also try for harpies as the only monsters because they are INSANELY fragile without gargs or other monsters screening them. T5 with a 4+ save. STUPID stats for a tmc, heavy bolters raep them.

Chaos list is awesome.

All you guys writing Necron fighting lists and death company lists....

Gretchin are STR2, T2, no armor save, with a STR3 single shot 12" gun.

None of these lists seem likely to lose against the gretchin swarm. Anyone with an idea that would LOSE to the STR2 gremlins?

1 chaos lord = 90 pts

5 marines = 75

5 marines = 75

44 spawns =1760

total. 2000.

That would be epic to see.

Having an all gretchin would be bad but not unplayably bad. With 180 models and an ok HQ you can pistol whip at S3 and then tie people up while you hold every objective ever. Plus because of the meta game they might do well against other crap armies. Personally I think one of the worst lists is DE on foot and then spamming as much of their useless wargear as possible (having 10 or 15 web way portals, ect.)

btw: I am the one playing OP

TheOniTsuki wrote:1 chaos lord = 90 pts

5 marines = 75

5 marines = 75

44 spawns =1760

total. 2000.

That would be epic to see.

Make them thousand sons, and you would have a immidiate post heresy 1K sons list.

I bet Aileros can show you the worst list ever back in 4th edition. I'll give you a hint... It involves giving as many models as possible master-crafted s3 shotguns.

this is a really funny idea. my worst list for csm would look something like this...

1 lord no wargear
2 5 man squads of thousand sons
the rest of the army chaos spawn

AF


Automatically Appended Next Post:
oh I see some other people thought of that too. lol

Ok this would beat the gretchin by virtue of the armour but its still a good exercise in pointless point allocation
I love this idea

2 Chapter Masters with twin Relic Blades, Artificer Armour, Melta Bombs, Digital Weapons, Hellfire Rounds and Jump Packs, 500 points

2 Scout Squads, Sarge's with twin Powerfist, Combat Blades, Melta Bombs, Camo Cloaks, and Teleport Homers, 320 points

Vanguard Veteran Squad, 10 men all with twin Thunder Hammers, Jump Packs and Melta Bombs, 960 points

Ven Dread with TLLC, TLAC, and Extra Armour, 220

22 men and a dread for 2000 spot on, looks pretty useless to me

This is really funny. But I'm too tired lazy to put together anything of my own so I'll just sit back and watch.

Tyranids:

HQ: Parasite of Mortrex (160)
Elites: 1 Lictor (65)
Troops: Ripper Swarm x 9 + Adrenal Glands, Toxin Sacs, Spinefists and Tunnel Swarm upgrade (225)
X 6
Fast Attack: Skyslasher Swarm x 5 + Adrenal Glands, Toxin Sacs, Spinefists (140)
X 3

Total: 1995

A single T4 Synapse Creature, and everything bar the Lictor takes a Leadership test (On Leadership 5) when out of synapse suffering the difference in unsaveable wounds when failed.

Being mostly swarms, nothing can hold objectives. All of the troops choices paid points to be allowed to deepstrike. Of course, with 4 attacks each, furious charge and 4+ poison they might make a mess of the marine armies above.

capt. tyco wrote:Platoon 1
w/ 1x non upgraded platoon command, 5x conscript guard squads

Platoon 2
Same as before but with one less squad

Lord Commissar

Primis Psyker


Crapton of ws/bs 3 sv 5+ conscripts with no heavy weapons. Because of unit consolidation and ordinance weapon could probably destroy half the army with one shot. Not to mention flamers and plasma guns.

Infantry platoons have to have at least two infantry squads, you can't just do a horde of conscripts. Sorry.

Also, I believe each platoon can take 0-1 conscript squad, so you can't have five of those anyway.

Maybe take Chenkov?

There seems to be two schools developing in this thread. The first is to take a few models as possible, the second is to take as many bad models as possible.

On gretchin

Mad doc - 160

6 sets of 30x Gretchin 3x Runtherd all w/ Cybork from the Doc - 285 Each for a total of 1710 pts.

The total so far is only 1870.

What else would you spend the points on? Flash gitz maybe? Looted Wagon without guns?

remember some of those gretchin will have a 5++ and Feel no Pain. If you face an army with S3 stuff, like Dark Eldar, the Feel no Pain would actually help.