40k Vending Machine I: Just As Planned

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**SixT4Pixels**

You get everything.

I insert a Space Marine

**snurl**

*I Win!*

You get a Chaos Space Marine.

I insert a Squat.

**Cryptek of Awesome**

The vending machine shudders violently for several seconds before emitting a dull clank followed by the faintest smell of burnt oil. The flap covering the ejection chute swings open slowly with a pathetic creak, but nothing is there.

As you turn to leave with your head hung in sadness, you hear a half formed whisper on the breeze.

"Never forget..."

I insert 42 kilos of monopose metal Necromunda Goliath models.

**ZergSmasher**

You get a Terran Goliath (from StarCraft).

I insert a Deathwatch marine's shoulder pad.

**snurl**

You get an Armorcast Titan.

I insert my Skullz points.

**War Kitten**

You get a Khorne Berzerker

I insert a bagel

**snurl**

You get a Blintz.

I insert one gallon of Gasoline.

**ZergSmasher**

You get a poorly-running two-cycle engine.

I insert a servo skull.

**War Kitten**

You get an RC car.

I insert an Imperial Knight

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a Deamforge Leviathan.

I insert two quarters.

**SixT4Pixels**

You get a half.

Math...

I insert a guardsman's helmet.

**Celestialpainting**

You get a guardsmen head

I insert a block of C-4

**SixT4Pixels**

You get a detonator.

I insert a power fist.

**snurl**

You get a boxing glove.

I insert Hillary Clinton.

**ZergSmasher**

You get Nurgle's Rot.

I insert an American flag.

**snurl**

You get the Rocket's Red Glare.

I insert a toupee.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a staple gun.

I insert an armadillo.

**snurl**

You get a hand grenade.

I insert Swedish Fish.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a Belgian waffle.

I insert a cat.

**ZergSmasher**

You get a mouse skeleton.

I insert a copy of Traitor's Hate.

**snurl**

You get a copy of "End of Watch".

I insert an unbuilt Imperial Guard sprue.

**KommissarKiln**

You get a game of 40k vs a massive gray army of doom.

I insert my ratty, 6 year old laptop with charger and mouse.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a Nintendo Game Boy.

I insert '56 Ford.

**snurl**

You get poor gas mileage and a musty aroma.

I insert an Indian Motorcycle.

**sing your life**

You get a OAP biker.

I insert Bernie Sanders.

**snurl**

You get Colonel Sanders.

I insert Spam.

**ZergSmasher**

You get Monty Python's Flying Circus.

I insert a WW1 biplane.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get another flying circus.

I insert a tire.

**snurl**

You get a swing.

I insert Yuengling Traditional Lager.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a Diet Coke.

I insert a Diet Coke.