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Granted, but you post your finished homework on dakka and turn in copies of your dakka post instead.

I wish my Battlefoam order arrives today.

Granted, but you have to answer 128397.5 questions about battle foam before you get it.

I wish I was a pie.

Granted. I eat you.

I wish Jaggedjaw the pie tasted like blueberry pie, rather than meat.

Granted, but you are allergic to blueberry pie.

I wish whoever corrupted this wish became Lord Tourettes.

Granted. However, you're a ********************** with a *********************** and a bucket of ********************* Daniel Radcliffe ******************************...

I wish to ********ing eat some ***********ing food.


You're **********************************************************************ing welcome.

Granted, but you ************ dog ************* Asgardian ************ing ********** Alachazem it instead.

I wish I knew the elder swear.

Granted. Here it is: *************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************.

The knowledge kills you.


I wish to not have to swear so *****ing much here.

Granted, but nobody actually feels insulted by it. And you are executed for the Heresy of knowing a xenos tongue.

I wish I had more fish.

Granted, you are now a flounder. Better find water fast.

I wish for another wish to corrupt.

Granted. All your sanctity are belong to us!

I wish for the Emprah do suddenly die!

Granted, the Emprah of the forces of Chaos are dead.

I wish I could be SAXTON HALE!

granted. you are a saxton hale miniature.

I wish i could get my affairs straight.

granted, but you then screw them up once again

I wish that I could finish my essay tonight and get A+

Granted. You could, but instead you spend the evening trolling on Dakka and playing Halo. Your grade suffers the consequences.

Granted, only

I wish there was a good Warhammer movie.

Granted. There is a Good Warhammer movie. But its in turnaround as long as GW and Speilburg wrangle over the rights.
I wish I had remembered to wish last time.

granted. you wish for a red sheep.

I wish for a burrito.

Granted, but it's made of red sheep meat (and wool).

I wish I could stop thinking about red sheep.

Granted. Now you constantly dream about white sheep and having to climb increasingly difficult block towers.

I wish my work computer allowed me to access Netflix online.

Granted, only now your computer's name is Hal.

I wish to bring red sheep back into this conversation.

Granted - you brought red sheep back to this conversation. Now they leave again.

I wish for fun.

Granted. You get GW's own FUN*

I wish for beer!

*Random=Fun. You roll a . A 10-tonne anvil lands on your head.

Granted. The dam breaks and millions of gallons of ice cold beer wash you away.

I wish for a few buckets when this happens. (red sheep like beer too)

Granted. you have some buckets. But they all have holes in them.

I wish for a wish that will conquer all wishes with a wish so powerful that it wishes away all the bad wishes and anti wishes, because that's what wishes do,

Granted, your wish is that powerful that it wishes away all the bad and anti wishes.

This thread now finished on post 4. No one comes here anymore. We have literary tumbleweeds.

My wife wishes for a watch that makes time go fast when she's working and slow when shes not.

A 'time manipulating watch' I have just been informed.

Granted, your first attempt to manipulate time however opens a rip in the Space-Time Continuum and angry daemons want to meet your skull.

I wish i wasn't a procrastinator.

Granted. You're not. In fact you get things done early. Too early. You stop putting off dying and die.

I wish for an unbeatable 40k army, with indestructible, and inanimate miniatures.

Wish granted, unfortunately they're 1000 ft tall and impossible to move. I wish I was a fish.

Granted, and right in front of you is this tiny shiny thing with food on it.

I wish I couldn't meet the president.

Granted. You meet Murray Clark, the president of The Shutter Store.

I wish I was good at sewing costumes.