40k Vending Machine I: Just As Planned

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**SignMaster99**

You get a dead cactus.

I insert a small mustached man.

**Guardsmen Bob**

You get a tall mustached man who was forced into the small ones shadow.

I insert all the bases that were belong to me.

**SignMaster99**

You get

I insert the meaning of life.

**Guardsmen Bob**

You get shot.

I insert Thor's hammer, with hand still attached.

**thepowerfulwill**

You get struck by lightning

I insert the hand and not the hammer.

**snurl**

You get the Hand of Nagash.
I insert the Eye of Vecna.

**the shrouded lord**

you get the reproductive system of vecna.
I am dead, but some one kicks me into the machine.

**thepowerfulwill**

You are REVIVED! As a chaos spawn.

I insert the newly formed chaos spawn.

**SignMaster99**

You get a Cadre Fireblade.

I insert a Great Knarloc.

**ChaoticMind**

You get a drunk T-Rex.

I insert a frog.

**Beaches**

you get a sip of some qui gon jinn

i insert the Battlestar Galactica into your atmosphere -sosayweall
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7da3iwxMUjU

**Guardsmen Bob**

You get a fanboy in a uniform.

I take all the men out of Canada and put them in the machine.

**the shrouded lord**

NinjAed

**KnuckleWolf**

A horde of angry Canadian housewives storms out of the machine demanding their husbands back EH?!

I put in a can of Coke-Cola, hoping to get a Starcraft Ghost's Canister Rifle that shoots Coke cans

Edit: uh crap now what happens?

**the shrouded lord**

You get kiran rodgers.
I jump out and Insert you're toy train.
Chaos spawn = cool!

**Guardsmen Bob**

You get your grandfather's childhood.

I insert the dreams of an (illegally) insane god.

**ChaoticMind**

You get a (drunk) Avatar of Destruction.

I insert the severed head of Cornell Sanders.

**SignMaster99**

You get McDonald's Chicken Fingers.

I insert a Baneblade.

**Co'tor Shas**

You get Bane filled with blades
I insert a "horrible donkey" longcoat

**ChaoticMind**

You get the vest off an aging overweight male stripper.

I insert a delicious chocolate chip cookie.

**Co'tor Shas**

You get a chocolate-chip squig
I insert a bionic head

**thepowerfulwill**

You get bone 'ead upgrades.

I insert a monkey that bares a SHOCKING resemblance to Winston Churchhill

**Co'tor Shas**

You get a orangutan that looks like FDR
I insert a very large toad

**thepowerfulwill**

You get a bald bull

I insert the orangutan

**Grey Templar**

There is a whirring followed by a wet sqelsch. Then a bottle of orange soda pops out.

I insert a pencil.

**thepowerfulwill**

You get an empty pen.

I insert a dollar and press D7. Like a sane human being.

**ChaoticMind**

You get a Cthulhu to the face.

I insert a rotting carcass.

**Malcador**

You get food poisoning.

I insert a copy of Timesplitters 1.

**Guardsmen Bob**

You get Timesplitters 5 the Prequel.

I insert the entire country (land and everything) of next person who posts.

**snurl**

You get an out of order sign.

I insert the Blues Brothers.