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As a professional editor for a college newspaper who has reviewed many games such as Warhammer 40k space marine, I believe I have more then enough credibility to propose a movie for Warhammer 40k.

My Idea:
First things we need to do is to make the Space Marines more human. They need to be regular humans in armor also, they have lives outside of their armour such as family and children and girlfriends and boyfriends. Regular Space Marines are boring. My idea for a main character is to have a guy in 20's, maybe an ultratemplar or something like that, where he has to spend his time looking for his lost girlfriend in the middle of ultramar during the Tryanid invasion. Also, some female space marines would be wise as well. Perhaps a love triangle where the main space marine character has to choose between his none space marine girlfriend or a girl that he has a secret crush on in his squad. Also, maybe add a chaos invasion or something and make Abaddon the Despoiler the main villain, maybe even a female. Perhaps, he as a female is secretly in love with the main character as well.

Heres a test script:

In the Year 40,000, humanity is in peril as aliens and chaos invades realspace....

The main space marine character: Hey Calgar!

Calgar: Whats up?

The main space marine character: this bolt isn't working for some reason when I try to shoot an Ork, it just won't fire

Calgar: Well, maybe you aren't pressing the trigger

The main space marine character: oh right I didn't notice that

Calgar: now is it working

The main space marine character: yes it is!

The main space marine character then shoots an Ork and kills it

Calgar: Good job, now the orks are running away

The main space marine character: wooooooooooo yahhhhhhhh!

The girlfriend comes hey

Girlfriend: Hey space marine!

The main space marine character: hey whats up girlfriend

The space marine headbangs letting his long hair that was covering his eyes back

Calgar: whats up girlfriend, how was Ciaphias Cain?

Girlfriend: he was very nice guy, he even gave me a plasma pistol as a gift

The main space marine character: very cool, but here is my own gift
The main space marine character gives her an infernus pistol

Girlfriend: cool, now I can duel wield

the girlfriend then takes out both pistols and starts pretending to fire

Girlfriend: pew pew pew pew pew pew pew boooooooooooooooooom

Calgar and The main space marine character pretends to get hit and falls down

Calgar: commons lets stop playing around and go to a mission briefing

The main space marine character: okay bye girlfriend

At the mission briefing

Captain Sicarius: okay we need to get ready for a tyranid invasion

The main space marine character: thats sounds like fun, I can't wait to use my bolter

Captain titus: be ready though, we need every marine on the mission

The main space marine character: okay!

Calgar: now lets go get your guns ready

they all put on jump packs and fly to their thunderhawk which flies them to their battle barge

Meanwhile in the eye of terror

Female Abaddon: look those space marines

Kharn: tell me about it


Thats only a test script I'll continue it later but how is it?

I want your drugs.

I hope very few posters feed this troll.

soooooooo much fail here. Why is this guy still posting?

And then they all get hit in the face by vikings, just like in twilight. Awesome!

You've got the "awful plot" part of your porn film right, but you forgot to include the sex. For example, the scene with Calgar has a lot of potential: the young hero asking his mentor for help in making his "bolt" fire, the older man lovingly shows him how to "press the trigger", and then there is a beautiful explosion in the ork's mouth. But then you completely forgot about the rest of the scene. The younger marine should spend some time polishing the old veteran's power sword (we'll leave the power fists for later in the movie) before the girlfriend joins in, this will emphasize the whole "battle brothers" thing.

Actually, on second thought, just drop the girlfriend entirely. 300 should be your inspiration for what a space marine porn film would look like, but with Tyranids (and don't forget the tentacles).

God Emperor.........
We need to send this guy to have a little talk with Matt Ward, seems like they will get along pretty well.

This belongs in the Dakka Fiction Forum at best...

Who voted yes?

At first I thought this was awesome in how bad it was.

Then it got so bad it passed through the awesome stage and got bad again.

Then it continued to get increasingly terrible.

Then I started developing seizures and brain aneurysms.

Also, Kronk, your title really doesn't like quotes. Looks all funky.

SouthTexanFrymire wrote:
As a professional editor for a college newspaper....

Stopped reading right there.

Not sure if serious or just trolling...

If trolling: 2/10, gave yourself away too early with things like "professional editor" and "college," things which are mutually exclusive with posting...that.

If serious, well then...I just can't even with that. Reading this was like one extremely drawn out face-palm.

Still better than ultramarine.

Well, that was a productive use of everyone;s time. Moving on.