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Well it looks like Eldar are next on the hit parade (even though if GW actually read their own fluff they'd know the Eldar should be extinct by now, but why quibble).

http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/463557.page

So that means it's time to post fictional and made up rumors!

1 - The reason for the Eldar's decline and fall is finally reviled - GAY MARRIAGE!

2 - To bring their stats in line with their models which are much thinner than IG, Guardians will now be S2, T2.

3 - The reason for the Eldar's decline and fall is finally reviled - OBAMA CARE!

4 - Guardians get a major buff, their shuriken cats now have a range of 13 1/2 inches!

5 - The reason for the Eldar's decline and fall is finally reviled - THE GUB'MENT TOOK THEIR GUNS!

6 - Warp Spiders NOW IN FINECAST! No need for new sculpts since they obviously got them perfect the first time.

7 - The reason for the Eldar's decline and fall is finally reviled - CHILDHOOD OBESITY!

8 - Harliquins can now take land raiders!

9 - The reason for the Eldar's decline and fall is finally reviled - INTERNET PIRACY!

10 - New monsterous creature, the Wraith Marquis!

What other completely fictional rumors do you have to add?

Harlequins will now have a new type of gun. It shoots flowers, models hit are removed from play as they feel shamed by getting rickrolled by clowns. Similarly, their melee attacks also remove from play. They also have a 3+ invuln save that is rerollable if the Harlequin is painted in at least 10 different colors.

Eldrad gets a new sculpt, the highlight of which is a massive codpiece to carry his, well, you know.

The new Eldar Flyer is amazing, it has 4 twin-linked bright lances and 2 twin-linked scatter lasers. Its also the very first vehicle kit made completely of finecast.

They were squats all along!

They are only going to be able to ally with Ultramarines.

Because they consider Roboute Guilliman to be their spiritual liege.

And their strongest psyker is a half human, half eldar Space Marine Librarian.

All the Phoenix Lords can be taken as one HQ FOC, which unlocks Phantoms as troop choices.

The eldar have this new weapon mount called "Bane of Slaneesh" it is a long shafted weapon with a bulge at the end and two power spheres.
In the fluff it shoots white warp energy that cause those hit by it to be teleported to slaneesh her/himself.
Bane of slaneesh may not be sold to those under the age of 18, or anyone with common decency.

To show that Eldar really are the pinnacle of Psychic powers, they will have access to all of Biomancy's spells and will generate 1/2 of a warp charge per Farseer on the table.

The reason for their fall is described. It was MY LITTLE PONY!!!!!

To keep in line with High Elves from WFB the Eldar will be given frost and fire flying Bluejays and Cardinals. These will act as Heldrakes and have a Eldar Guardian riding on the back. They will also have flying chariots and flying D Cannons pulled in tow by their mighty war birds!

It will turn out that the Dark Eldar are actually good, and the normal Eldar are actually evil.

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
The eldar have this new weapon mount called "Bane of Slaneesh" it is a long shafted weapon with a bulge at the end and two power spheres.
In the fluff it shoots white warp energy that cause those hit by it to be teleported to slaneesh her/himself.
Bane of slaneesh may not be sold to those under the age of 18, or anyone with common decency.

The Bane of Slaneesh however can be countered by the Boon of Slaneesh, a narrow warp porthole mounted between two long graceful limbs. So long as the Bane's power is fired right between the two limbs into the porthole there is no damage.

For nine months at least.

The only issue with the OP's post is that the Brits (and Europe in general) generally tends to be more left-wing...there is virtually nothing resembling the ideals of the U.S. republican party and so it's more likely that they would support both gay marriage and obamacare. That being said:

The Eldar are going to get invisible, deep-striking webway gates that can spawn wraithguard.

 greyknight12 wrote:
The only issue with the OP's post is that the Brits (and Europe in general) generally tends to be more left-wing...there is virtually nothing resembling the ideals of the U.S. republican party and so it's more likely that they would support both gay marriage and obamacare. That being said:

The Eldar are going to get invisible, deep-striking webway gates that can spawn wraithguard.

The humor test, you have failed it.

 Grey Templar wrote:

 greyknight12 wrote:
The only issue with the OP's post is that the Brits (and Europe in general) generally tends to be more left-wing...there is virtually nothing resembling the ideals of the U.S. republican party and so it's more likely that they would support both gay marriage and obamacare. That being said:

The Eldar are going to get invisible, deep-striking webway gates that can spawn wraithguard.

The humor test, you have failed it.

Probably because what's been posted barely qualifies.

Kid_Kyoto wrote:
1 - The reason for the Eldar's decline and fall is finally reviled...

greyknight12 wrote:The only issue with the OP's post is that the Brits (and Europe in general) generally tends to be more left-wing...there is virtually nothing resembling the ideals of the U.S. republican party and so it's more likely that they would support both gay marriage and obamacare.

Nah, the OP got it right.... Shame it took all the Lefties 40,000 years to come around, though. (I think he meant revealed.)

Well keeping in line with the mood of my country these past few weeks *sigh*, the cause of the Fall is revealed..
..
..
..Thatcher.

On a more (less?) serious note, in keeping with GW's desire to be releasing bigger and badder models for each army, the Eldar can now field a Craftworld as a 0-1 heavy support choice, Saim-Hann and Ulthwe the only named Craftworlds, the former taking up a FA, the latter a HQ slot. These do not count towards the 0-1 limit.
Also, to tackle the Riptide and Dreadknight, a new Monstrous Creature that looks like a walker is to be released, the Wraithavatar.

Thinking its rather silly to keep a dying race like the Eldar fighting, GW retcons them into a pact with the humanity of man making every Eldar warrior half Eldar and half Space Marine.

These new Gem Marines all have lasers and mind bullets and move as fast as Spiderman.

BairdEC wrote:

Kid_Kyoto wrote:
1 - The reason for the Eldar's decline and fall is finally reviled...

greyknight12 wrote:The only issue with the OP's post is that the Brits (and Europe in general) generally tends to be more left-wing...there is virtually nothing resembling the ideals of the U.S. republican party and so it's more likely that they would support both gay marriage and obamacare.

Nah, the OP got it right.... Shame it took all the Lefties 40,000 years to come around, though. (I think he meant revealed.)

Not if he's fixing to "revile" a new race for 40k, in the style of an earlier, storied reviling Of the Pan Fo, talked of back in the day on these forums.

New Eldar flier has a 1% chance of looking even vaguely similar to the Forgeworld Nightwing, 99% chances of resembling a giant cockatiel that gaks rainbows.

Farseers are now plastic. Everything else is now Finecast.

 n0t_u wrote:
Thinking its rather silly to keep a dying race like the Eldar fighting, GW retcons them into a pact with the humanity of man making every Eldar warrior half Eldar, half Space Marine, all cop.

Fixed that for you.

They'll be able to actually win a game.

Macho Eldar exist.

shade1313 wrote:

 Grey Templar wrote:


The humor test, you have failed it.

Probably because what's been posted barely qualifies.

I breathlessly await your superior contributions.

BairdEC wrote:

(I think he meant revealed.)

No I mean reviled... you kind of had to be there.

Exodites will be released.

We will get a new monstrous creature from the spiritual remains of Eldrad - The Wraithdrad.
As 'all but a handful of eldrads waystones have fallen dark', we will be able to field 56 wraithdrads per foc.

We will get a warp spider phoenix lord.

We will also have a new rule - 'we knew you were going to do that'. This rule, said at ANY time, automatically means we win. Even when your mate is asleep at 3.45am and you have to phone to tell him.

Ok, so the following stuff is what I saw from the leaked codex at HQ.

Eldrad now comes back from the Dead as a Wraith Lord with S10 T10 2++ Invul 5 Wound, Fleshbane Armor Bane, AP1, ID, Eternal Warrior, Fearless, rerollable FNP(2+), Never ending Psychic(Never perils), ML5 and have all power in all books.

Runes of Warding now has a range of 720" yes 720".
and makes your opponent roll 4D6 + psychic level * 1D6 for psychic test.

Normal enemy Psykers within Runes of Warding have to take a psychic test with the runes of warding rules, and the pskyer gets removed if failed.
Entire units Psyker squads are just removed.

Rune of Witnessing allows you to roll 4D6 for every shooting, assault, saves, FNP for all allied units within 720" of Eldrad, and can choose the result that you like.

Eldrad also now makes Wraith Lords troop choices and reduces point cost for Wraith lords by 50 points and all upgrades are now free.
Also they can be taken in squadrons too.

Eldrad also act as a wraithseer for all purposes,

Eldrad's weapons all have a 180" range.
S10 AP1 Large Blast Assault 10.


Fluff Summary from what I saw in the codex.
Eldrad consumed Tzeentch and took away all the blue scribs spells while he was in the warp.
Killed Draigo since Draigo pissed Eldrad off for calling Eldrad a sissy Xenos.
And one day his spirit stone got placed into a Wraith and became a Wraithlord himself.

Eldar will have a new rule called "Eldar Trickery" it works as follows:

Roll a D6 for every unit in the army:

1) That unit gets a 2++ save until their next turn.
2) That unit can move an extra 6" in the movement phase, with no penalty to anything (not even shooting. Heavy weapons can be fired as if they never moved, if they only use the bonus 6")
3) When the unit next gets shot, the enemy takes all the wounds, instead of the Eldar.
4) The unit gets "Preferred Enemy" and "Hatred" against all enemies.
5) Matt Ward invents a new cheese unit/rule/weapon and gives it to the Eldar player.
6) Auto win.

Warning: Random = Fun*

*May not actually be fun

 Selym wrote:

Warning: Cinematic = Fun*

*May not actually be fun

Fix'd. I think thats the official joke at that point isn't it?

The Codex will have Cost-Efficient units.