40k Vending Machine I: Just As Planned

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**the shrouded lord**

You receive Russian military experiments, have fun with that.
The dovahkin explodes and I come out, a chaos spawn again.
I insert all 17 daedric artefacts.

**thepowerfulwill**

You get malal.

I run from Malal, as he targets all chaos based life forms around, fleeing from him, I hurl some rocks, they fly into a slot on the machine.

**Guardsmen Bob**

You hit the jackpot, and win 1000 clams!

The cops are chasing me, so I insert the evidence.

**ChaoticMind**

You get a fully stocked and staffed CSI lab, court, and jail with the evidence you tossed into the vending machine. Thankfully they aren't registered as a valid lab / court / or jail.

I insert a policeman.

**the shrouded lord**

You recieve a MachEte. You know what must be done. I insert hounds of loken.

**thenoobbomb**

You recieve a Legion of One.

I insert a sweetroll.

**thepowerfulwill**

You get the falmer lord that was transformed so long ago bye he wabbajack. He is PISSED.

I insert a halo brute.

**snurl**

You get a Hello Kitty.

I insert Lego.

**ChaoticMind**

You get MegaBloks

I insert the corrupt a wish thread.

**thepowerfulwill**

You get a brass oil lamp.

I insert a horse made of diamonds. BECAUSE I"M RICH.

**Guardsmen Bob**

You get a song about how you cannot afford ford ford ford a diamond hor(s)e hor(s)e hor(s)e hor(s)e.

I insert a tied up vampire, head first.

**snurl**

You get a Nightwing Marine.

I insert a brown paper bag.

**thenoobbomb**

You recieve lunch money, and a bully.

I insert a flying croissant.

**snurl**

You get a potato gun.
I insert antibiotics.

**ChaoticMind**

You get antivirals.

I insert a puppy.

**Guardsmen Bob**

You get a pissed off dog owner.

I insert the best of humanity.

**thenoobbomb**

You recieve thenoobbomb.

I insert autocorrect.

**Co'tor Shas**

Your get at orangutan purple.
I insert a fluff argument

**thepowerfulwill**

You get references to rouge trader

I insert 3 player chess

**snurl**

You get a Rubik's Cube.
I insert my cat.

**Co'tor Shas**

You get arrested by the ASPCA
I insert cthulhu

**Guardsmen Bob**

You get Old Man Henderson

Spoiler:

I insert a priest, rabbi, and Charlie Sheen.

**snurl**

You get some kind of joke.

I insert old black & white Astroboy reruns.

**KnuckleWolf**

You receive a Iron Man comic. And inspiration for a new Assault Marine kitbash

I put in a tank of compressed oxygen

**Grey Templar**

You get a whoopie cushion

I insert a lime

**ChaoticMind**

You get kumquat marmalade.

I insert a pound of MSG.

**Co'tor Shas**

You get an ounce of Chinese food
I insert a top hat and goggles

**the shrouded lord**

you receive the monopoly man in a fighter jet.
I insert half of a my little pony. the rest of it is dead, as it should be.

**Co'tor Shas**

You get recalled hamburger.
I insert =][=

**snurl**

You get >0<

I insert foam, glue, and sand