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 odorofdeath wrote:
I'm waiting for someone to re-tell the old story about the kid who tried to eat his opponent's model.

Or the one about the woman who had her breasts fondled by a stranger in a GW.

Hopefully someone can find these old gems and dredge them back up

Sadly I don't have the original text for the first one, but it's such a classic.

The story goes like this (pulling from memory, so apologies if I get details wrong):

The match is Chaos Space Marines vs. Space Marines. The Chaos player has put a ton of effort into his super special awesome Chaos Lord, dumped a ton of points into him, etc. etc. At some point in the game, the Librarian is in a position to assault the Chaos Lord, so he casts Quickening on himself (which brings the Librarian up to Initiative 10) and points all of his attacks at the Chaos Lord. Chaos Lord takes a wound, and the Librarian passes his psychic test to inflict Instant Death from his force weapon.

The Chaos player was just crushed, his big important model killed by a wimpy little Librarian (they're not exactly masters of close combat, just sayin' ). The Space Marine player offered to reroll the dice and not use the Quickening, since it killed the Chaos Lord in one round without the Lord ever getting a chance to go, but the Chaos player refused. He then grabbed his clippers, lunged across the table at the Space Marine player (who dodged backwards to avoid it). The Chaos player then grabbed the Librarian model, clipped off his force weapon, put it into his mouth and swallowed it. I think the guy was wrestled to the ground and banned from the store, but admittedly it's been a while.

As for my own experiences...I've seen a couple, all by one player. So, the first one, which I don't feel was justified (because that game wound up being a draw anyways), was my Space Wolves vs. his Tau. The mission basically starts off by having each player set down 6 tokens across the board, 12" away from each other, and then dividing his army into 6 parts. Each part then starts out right next to one of the tokens.

Well, as you might have guessed, this isn't exactly a great mission for the Tau. I won the roll to go first, he failed to seize, and I essentially placed every one of my tokens exactly 12" away from his, no matter what. It might have been kind of dickish, but it was a tournament, so sue me. First turn rolls around, I essentially stomp over most of his units, since started everything well within 12" of his units. He manages to pull a draw, since I couldn't actually deal with his Crisis Suits (he managed to get his fire warriors into a screen protecting them while they jumped away), but after that first turn, he winds up throwing half of his dead models across the table to his right, and then turns around to kick the wall behind him in frustration.

Second one, same guy. It should be noted that this guy is one of my buddies (kinda) and I've lent him my Tau units so he can actually play (the previous story had him using my Tau as well). This time, however, he's proxying them as Necrons, back when they had a 3e codex. This was just as I was starting to play Wolves, so I'm proxying an army just to try it out, using Logan Grimnar, 2 squads of Wolf Guard Terminators, and 2 Land Raiders. He's got 3 Monoliths and a whole mess of Warriors with two Resurrection Orb Lords hanging out in the middle.

Game starts, I basically dash across the board untouched in my Land Raiders, since this was before 4 glances killed a Land Raider. He fails to do anything to my Land Raiders on Turn 1, on Turn 2 I move up 12", jump out, and multi-assault two big units of Warriors, one of which has one of his Lords in it. Note that he, at this point, did not move up very far because his Monoliths were in the way. My Terminators leap out, kill a ton of Warriors, and whatever was left runs off the board, including his first Lord.

At this point, he throws an absolute fit and forfeits the game - which I admit is kind of understandable; he had nothing on the board that could punch through my armor, and half of his Necrons had just fled from the board, giving him basically one turn to kill my Terminators before I forced a phase out. But he then grabs the Crisis Suits that I had been proxying as my Terminators and throws them across the room, where they hit a wall and snap off their bases. I think I just stared at him shocked, and then quietly packed up my stuff. I was just amazed that he could get so angry at losing so quickly, even knowing that Space Wolves were a powerful army and Necrons (3e codex in 5e rules) were a really weak army.

If you can't tell from these two stories, this guy is a terrible, terrible loser. I'm not saying that in a derogatory sense, like he's a loser, I mean that he's just really bad at losing graciously. When things don't go his way, he gets pissy and stops playing, not even just in 40k.

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

But the "Give everyone a trophy" is very much a myth. I think it is more parents showering praise for small things then any big "Everyone is a winner" mentality.

Actually, it's not a myth. It's alive and well for kids under about the age of 10-12 depending on the activity. I know this because I have kids in that age bracket and every activity they have been involved in that is competitive treats them this way. Soccer, T-ball / LL, Peewee, Karate, doesn't matter.

I can attest as a person that was a child a mere decade ago (like 10 to 14), I received a participation trophy when my little league team made the playoffs, came in second place, or failed to really do anything... We got trophies... thousands of them... The boy scouts were a little better, they gave ribbons, so at least you felt bad about getting something that said "participant" 1st, 2nd, and 3rd got trophies and ribbons lol

Annnnd this is why I quit 40k. For whatever reason, the fantasy crowd is much more relaxed and there to have fun. Played 2 GTs in fantasy and have had nothing but amazing games. can't recall a single 40k tournament where there wasn't a moment like this to some extent.

12thRonin wrote:

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

But the "Give everyone a trophy" is very much a myth. I think it is more parents showering praise for small things then any big "Everyone is a winner" mentality.

Actually, it's not a myth. It's alive and well for kids under about the age of 10-12 depending on the activity. I know this because I have kids in that age bracket and every activity they have been involved in that is competitive treats them this way. Soccer, T-ball / LL, Peewee, Karate, doesn't matter.

Did you take the trphies away and trash them? Telling them they didnt deserve them?

conker249 wrote:
Imy friends are just watching and wondering why I am putting up with it, I dont know either really, just didnt think he would be that bad, cursing, yelling, throwing dice across the room, all in front of his 5 year old kid, he is 35. he beats me 6 to 4 kill points, and im just glad its over. never playing him again, anyone else have stories like this about TFG?

I agree with your friends. I'd simply tell him something along the lines of "Yeah, this isn't fun. I'm not going to play against you anymore." and pack up my models. My time these days is too valuable to spend on douchebags.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 Eidolon wrote:
Not directly bad sportsmanship, but we have a family that comes into my LGS. Dad, mom, and about 3 spawn. 1 or 2 of the kids tend to run around and grab other peoples models. The dad proceeds to glare at you when you tell his kids not to touch your stuff. The third spawn is a baby who is parked in its stroller for hours on end. And when it starts to scream and cry about whatever, the mom responds by doing absolutely nothing. This often leads to trying to play next to a child who can cry for 30 minutes to an hour straight.

See, I'd tell the kids off, and then tell him to get his kids under control while glaring at him. I've done that a number of times in various situations where it warranted it. (though never in a game shop). In a LGS, I'd also leave, and tell the owner exactly why. I would never have the patience now to play next to a screaming kid.

I'd also blame the school system. It's clearly schools' fault that parents let their kids turn into ferals.

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

12thRonin wrote:

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

But the "Give everyone a trophy" is very much a myth. I think it is more parents showering praise for small things then any big "Everyone is a winner" mentality.

Actually, it's not a myth. It's alive and well for kids under about the age of 10-12 depending on the activity. I know this because I have kids in that age bracket and every activity they have been involved in that is competitive treats them this way. Soccer, T-ball / LL, Peewee, Karate, doesn't matter.

Did you take the trphies away and trash them? Telling them they didnt deserve them?

No, and it sounds like you have some issues that's you're projecting that you need help with. Nowhere did I say anything like that at all. Did I tell them what they need to do better and push them to do so, yes. That's what a parent does.

Y'know, NVM, Im beating a dead horse with stupid asinine arguments.

Sticks usually work better when beating anything.

 Locclo wrote:

 odorofdeath wrote:
I'm waiting for someone to re-tell the old story about the kid who tried to eat his opponent's model.

Or the one about the woman who had her breasts fondled by a stranger in a GW.

Hopefully someone can find these old gems and dredge them back up

Sadly I don't have the original text for the first one, but it's such a classic.

The story goes like this (pulling from memory, so apologies if I get details wrong):

The match is Chaos Space Marines vs. Space Marines. The Chaos player has put a ton of effort into his super special awesome Chaos Lord, dumped a ton of points into him, etc. etc. At some point in the game, the Librarian is in a position to assault the Chaos Lord, so he casts Quickening on himself (which brings the Librarian up to Initiative 10) and points all of his attacks at the Chaos Lord. Chaos Lord takes a wound, and the Librarian passes his psychic test to inflict Instant Death from his force weapon.

The Chaos player was just crushed, his big important model killed by a wimpy little Librarian (they're not exactly masters of close combat, just sayin' ). The Space Marine player offered to reroll the dice and not use the Quickening, since it killed the Chaos Lord in one round without the Lord ever getting a chance to go, but the Chaos player refused. He then grabbed his clippers, lunged across the table at the Space Marine player (who dodged backwards to avoid it). The Chaos player then grabbed the Librarian model, clipped off his force weapon, put it into his mouth and swallowed it. I think the guy was wrestled to the ground and banned from the store, but admittedly it's been a while.

Found it

 Little lord Fauntleroy wrote:
Worst happened earlier. I was playing against a chaos marine guyin a 1500pt game-he was new to chaos, so I thought "What the hey-should be fun, and as a chaos player myself I might be able to give him some help". However, I decided to use my Howling Griffons, and my newly converted plastic Epistolary Librarian, so it doesn't just turn into Thousand sons ap 3 slaughterhouse.

From the moment the game started I knew it would end badly-the exact nature, of it though I couldn't have forseen. He had the most annoying voice, and constantly bragged about how his Lord with a demon weapon, Sorceror with bolt of change and 10 heavily upgraded Terminator champions (Yes, I laughed too-and died a little inside) would totally annihlate my little 'girly' marines. However, his attempt to telerport his Terminators containing the sorceror right next to my one remaining scout I had on the objective failed, with them all being destroyed. He looked pissed off, but I didn't honestly think he was going to kick off. So, I charged my Libby into his lord-fair enough, you probably think. Wait for it (I know this is long winded, but I just want to be as clear on the events as possible-I don't quite believe it myself yet). In the assault phase, I strike first (Under the effect of the Quickening Power) and wound the lord. Then, passing my force weapon check, killed it in one before it struck back.

For a moment, the guy just sat there, mouth open. I asked if he wanted to redo the combat, and this time I wouldn't use the quickening (it did seem a kind of cheep move in my eyes.) Then, with a wail that would have put a banshee to shame, he grabbed his clippers from the table and came at me. I think he was going for my throat, but I moved quickley-it just caught my face, and drew a bit of blood. While I was dazed, he picked up my libby, clipped off his force weapon blade-and ate it. Yes, that's right, he actually ATE my force weapon. He then proceeded to clip more bits off, before smashing him into the ground and grinding it into the ground, before jumping back and asking "How's Booky Dweebish (His name for my Librarian) gonna kill my marines NOW?", and started laughing.

The store had just completely stopped now-all eyes on me. I bent down and picked up the battererd remains of my Librarian. Yes, a tear or two were shed-But I had put at least 15 man hours into PLANNING this guy out, he was to be my masterpiece. I then looked up at my opponent. He had stopped laughing by now.

I don't know exactly what happened next, but people standing nearby said to me after that they could see the Mark of Khorne light up in my eyes, and that I have never moved so fast. In the end, I think it was Paul-Resident Blackshirt and a credit to managers everywhere.-who stopped me from going after that guy and killing him. Afterwords, after closing and well into Pauls own time,he sat with me and helped me to rebuild my Librarian-although I asked to keep his backpack slightly broken as a reminder. I then walked out of the store with 2 nice free boxes of the new Stormvermin-so today wasn't a total loss .

I just got back from the docters a while ago-he said the bleeding should stop soon, but I may have a scar there for the rest of my days. I know some people will say I overeacted, and I apologise-but that Librarian was important to me (and I wonder why I have no Girlfreind ). I know that some people will also complain that I've wrote too much-again I apologise, but as I said earlier, I'm still not sure I belive this myself yet.

Take care

LLF

There's also

Miraclefish wrote:There was a lad called Jordan who played when I first got into GW about 12 years ago. He was the archetypal Annoying Game Store Child.

He ran around, barely painted his models, picked up and broke other peoples' and kicked off when his Space Wolves didn't win everything.

After a while, when he broke a nice, kind customer's Leman Russ tank by dropping it, the staff told him he was banned from the store for a month and should take the time to think about his behaviour.

Well, Jordan wasn't having this. He ran to the modeling table to enact some sort of bitter revenge. Sadly there was naught to destroy.

But look! Paints! So Jordan reaches for a pot of Ultramarines Blue and flips the cap. Everyone steps back, fearing the pigment will fly. And then...

...he drinks it.

No, I don't know why, either. But he laughs, and runs for the door, through a sea of people frozen into inaction through confusion.

He get to the door and falters, stumbles. "I..... I don't feel well...."

We watch in silence as he staggers a few steps and clutches his stomach. He looks for a bin to throw up in. He finds none. Which leads to one of the most surreal moments of my life.

I watch a young lad sobbing quietly as he throws up blue-tainted vomit and bitter bile time and time again into the slot of an unfortunate Royal Mail postbox.

Then his mum came to collect him.

Ha. Ha. Ha.

sorry if its already. been posted

....I suddenly feel much better about my matches.

Oh god....
How will I be able to go into my GW today now?!
Curse you DukeBadham, CURSE YOU!!!!!
*Vomits blue paint into post box&

@Krellnus
Just as planned, Mwahaha.

That's not very nice...

 Krellnus wrote:

That's not very nice...

sorry

Back in the Day of Rogue Trader , we couldnt get a copy of the compendium which had the stats for a shuriken pistol , so the eldar player 'wrote' them up as one point less powerful than a shuriken catapult....which he then inclueded following fire on which ate through our games as the squad cohereancy was 2 inches and FF said you hit , you can shoot at another model within two inches.

I got the compedium for christmas , and the next game showed the entire group that shuriken pistols didnt have FF , to which he just said , well Im still playing them as they , so none of us played him again , which was a bit of a pain as it was mostly his terrain we used.

Reading some of the thread that was linked and got to the part where they were talking about slapping kids. If someone, other than family and a few close friends, slapped my kids they would end up in the hospital. If they need to be slapped I'll do. You do it and I'll do my best to break your hands.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
But then again my oldest paints models himself and flips out when ever his younger sister or brother look at his models funny. I also don't take my two young-uns to games stores ... yet.

I remember that thread and all the he-man attitude there toward kids. All I know is that if anyone hits my kids they will be on the ground either voluntarily or involuntarily at gun point.

I don't carry a gun.

I do have a mean walking stick though, and a pair of model clippers in my gaming bag, as well a s a tube of superglue and zipkicker.

That stuff HURTS when you have superglue on your hands that you didn't notice, and the accelerant hits it

There have been store kids i'd happily have slapped, but my kids are a no-go. If they need disciplining for doing something obnoxious, that's for me to do not some random stranger.

Hypocritical, i know..

If everyone followed through on their internet tough guy threats FLGSs the world over would be swimming in blood and half of Dakkas' members would be in jail.

Quite likely

I've never superglue-accelerated anyone in anger, but then no-one has yet given me sufficient provocation, and i have a long fuse.

been tempted a time or two though..

 Little lord Fauntleroy wrote:
Worst happened earlier. I was playing against a chaos marine guyin a 1500pt game-he was new to chaos, so I thought "What the hey-should be fun, and as a chaos player myself I might be able to give him some help". However, I decided to use my Howling Griffons, and my newly converted plastic Epistolary Librarian, so it doesn't just turn into Thousand sons ap 3 slaughterhouse.

From the moment the game started I knew it would end badly-the exact nature, of it though I couldn't have forseen. He had the most annoying voice, and constantly bragged about how his Lord with a demon weapon, Sorceror with bolt of change and 10 heavily upgraded Terminator champions (Yes, I laughed too-and died a little inside) would totally annihlate my little 'girly' marines. However, his attempt to telerport his Terminators containing the sorceror right next to my one remaining scout I had on the objective failed, with them all being destroyed. He looked pissed off, but I didn't honestly think he was going to kick off. So, I charged my Libby into his lord-fair enough, you probably think. Wait for it (I know this is long winded, but I just want to be as clear on the events as possible-I don't quite believe it myself yet). In the assault phase, I strike first (Under the effect of the Quickening Power) and wound the lord. Then, passing my force weapon check, killed it in one before it struck back.

For a moment, the guy just sat there, mouth open. I asked if he wanted to redo the combat, and this time I wouldn't use the quickening (it did seem a kind of cheep move in my eyes.) Then, with a wail that would have put a banshee to shame, he grabbed his clippers from the table and came at me. I think he was going for my throat, but I moved quickley-it just caught my face, and drew a bit of blood. While I was dazed, he picked up my libby, clipped off his force weapon blade-and ate it. Yes, that's right, he actually ATE my force weapon. He then proceeded to clip more bits off, before smashing him into the ground and grinding it into the ground, before jumping back and asking "How's Booky Dweebish (His name for my Librarian) gonna kill my marines NOW?", and started laughing.

The store had just completely stopped now-all eyes on me. I bent down and picked up the battererd remains of my Librarian. Yes, a tear or two were shed-But I had put at least 15 man hours into PLANNING this guy out, he was to be my masterpiece. I then looked up at my opponent. He had stopped laughing by now.

I don't know exactly what happened next, but people standing nearby said to me after that they could see the Mark of Khorne light up in my eyes, and that I have never moved so fast. In the end, I think it was Paul-Resident Blackshirt and a credit to managers everywhere.-who stopped me from going after that guy and killing him. Afterwords, after closing and well into Pauls own time,he sat with me and helped me to rebuild my Librarian-although I asked to keep his backpack slightly broken as a reminder. I then walked out of the store with 2 nice free boxes of the new Stormvermin-so today wasn't a total loss .

I just got back from the docters a while ago-he said the bleeding should stop soon, but I may have a scar there for the rest of my days. I know some people will say I overeacted, and I apologise-but that Librarian was important to me (and I wonder why I have no Girlfreind ). I know that some people will also complain that I've wrote too much-again I apologise, but as I said earlier, I'm still not sure I belive this myself yet.

Take care

LLF

That still has to be one of the most OTT stories ever told on Dakka.....

It gets dredged up once in a while but i can never read it and take it seriously; something about the language used to tell the story just screams fake to me.

Apocalypse game.

I charge Fuagan - the burning lance with my dreadnought. Not a wise move I guess, but better than the alternative. The fire dragon phoenix lord gets 2 hits, both glance and both fail to do anything, 1's or 2's thankfully to my venerable. However, I roll my 3 dice to hit. 2 dice wound.

The kid who got the lord looks at the lord in disbelief. It's like the lord got killed on purpose. He goes NUTS and throws the phoenix lord into the middle of the table, where most of the troops are. Two players are using both IG and tyranids, so there's lots of models.

The manager escorts the kid outside, and bans him from the store. His mum comes in and asks why.

 gunslingerpro wrote:
Grown men who act as children, not limited to meatspace any longer...

Anywho, the best thing you can do is not let it burn you out. I've seen it happen quite a few times where someone got cheated or played a TFG and left the game. As long as you don't let that happen to you, you've already won.

He summed it up well here. Don't like people like him bother you, you are the better person in this instance. It's disgusting that he did that in front of his kid as well. It's only a game, after all. Keep being a good person and good things will happen.

 motyak wrote:
On topic, I've never come across someone with really bad sportsmanship, the closest was probably me quitting turn 1 one game when I went from a 1750 army to about 750 if that, but it was just against my brother in my garage and we could just have a second game real quick after. He had suffered no damage turn 1, I had one platoon and a CCS left. It was all over, we both agreed. Its the earliest time I've ever seen a game end, and I've certainly never seen the whole throwing-a-model-smashing-shouting-etc deal.

Conceding a match isn't poor sportsmanship, especially if the game will just be a drag because of a disastrous turn 1. If both players aren't having fun, then both have broken rule #1.
It's a gray area in a tournament depending on the scoring for the tourney, but still, if the TOs don't allow for concessions potentially wrecking the ranking*, I'd say something's wrong with the format used.
*-such as by allowing one player to move to far up the ladder if their opponent concedes, or by greatly limiting the points they get if the opponent concedes and then denies them the points they would have gotten had they played the match out.

HOW you concede is a different story.

Haha Lobbas, no one uses lobbas, so how can they be OP?

smellyoldgamer wrote:

 motyak wrote:
On topic, I've never come across someone with really bad sportsmanship, the closest was probably me quitting turn 1 one game when I went from a 1750 army to about 750 if that, but it was just against my brother in my garage and we could just have a second game real quick after. He had suffered no damage turn 1, I had one platoon and a CCS left. It was all over, we both agreed. Its the earliest time I've ever seen a game end, and I've certainly never seen the whole throwing-a-model-smashing-shouting-etc deal.

Conceding a match isn't poor sportsmanship, especially if the game will just be a drag because of a disastrous turn 1. If both players aren't having fun, then both have broken rule #1.
It's a gray area in a tournament depending on the scoring for the tourney, but still, if the TOs don't allow for concessions potentially wrecking the ranking*, I'd say something's wrong with the format used.
*-such as by allowing one player to move to far up the ladder if their opponent concedes, or by greatly limiting the points they get if the opponent concedes and then denies them the points they would have gotten had they played the match out.

HOW you concede is a different story.

The how was no matter. We both looked at eachother once we were done rolling and were like ".......whelp. That'll do" and started again.

My flgs has a TFG and man he is a dick, i never played him thankfully but we were playing warmahordes and i was using menoth agianst mercs a fun match-up i played a lot. Back on topic my buddy was cryx agianst a legion of everblight guy this guys name is scott and he was the tfg at titan a old game store that closed like 6 years ago, they had a rule disagreement and since the game was timed to 35 minutes my buddy asked if they could pause the game to get this figured out well 10 minutes later they get it squared away and they start were they left off, The game i was in we called a draw so we could watch this guy essentially cheat he did everything possible he would roll his dice then say hit no matter what always add another inch to his movement and just not be a fun person. Well the end of the game the guy is losing and says at the 30 mintue mark when he is done he is going to bring in those 10 minutes he lost looking up rules the game store got so quiet it seemed everyone had left, he got glared at and when he walked up to get his winning stamp the owners were pissed at him.

All in all happy i never played him i wouldve stomped him becasue i can do what he did to my buddy but its nice to know that he quit playing.

I have a story to tell, im fairly new to wargaming (maybe 8-10 months now) and i finally decided to enter the doubles tourny at my FLGS(it was a 2k game so each team of 2 players each brings 1k pt army) my friend brought his SW and i decided to bring my GK's i ran drago + 10 pallys and a single solodin plus a vindicare, all kitted to the teeth ) this was my friend and i's 1st ever tourny (we have a group of 5 friends) who we normally rotate playing.

we had never fought a dark eldar player before so we were sort of excited.

Turn one i moved roughly to the middle of the field to force our NME's to stay back from the objectives that i was now holding (had 2/3 after 1 turn) his first turn he shoots his pirate ship looking thingy (still dont know the name, maybe ravager?) and he said it has a heavy 9 ST8 ap 2 gun. i was blown away, i was like holy crap that is the perfect anti paladin gun, he managed to kill 4 paladins on his first turn. (having never played dark eldar in my head i cried imba lol)

I managed to kill some of his transports turn 2 and my ally destroyed some of his ork allies troops/trukks. turn 2 he wiped all but drago, my solodin and my vindicare off the board. (again in my head i cried imba but kept my mouth shut because they have to have a weakness) game was over on turn 4.

It was over all a friendly game with smiles all around. we were cracking jokes about how he couldnt kill my solodin( i had him in hide in a corner the entire game lol) and it was only after the tourny was over (by 2-3 days) i looked into the dark eldar codex (hey if you cant beat em, join em right?)

i then realized he has no heavy 9 str 8 ap 2 gun. turns out he was cheating / combining two guns into one. dark eldar have a heavy 9 but its only str 5 ap 2 , they also have a heavy 3 str 9 ap 2. so he was either cheating the whole time or perhaps really confused on how to play the game, this left a bad taste in my mouth because he actually won the tournament (our team came in 4th out of 22 teams) which made me even more mad because if he was playing right the whole game, my team could of made it into the prize pool on our first ever tourny! :(

my lesson that I've learned is now i ask questions when playing armys ive never fought before because you never know who will beat you just using their mouth and not the dice

very true man