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When stag nights become Stag Weekends, things have gone too far.

They are your friends and they want to share their special day with you?
Also, what happened to poker with your friends with a stripper or two coming by?

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
They are your friends and they want to share their special day with you?

Friendship shouldn't require me to take out a loan in order to prove it.

 azazel the cat wrote:
I'm of Italian heritage; we only give envelopes with cash.

And offers they can't refuse?

 Kilkrazy wrote:
Going off at a tangent, the modern fashion for long distance stag weekends has become a excessive burden in cost and time for some of my younger friends and colleagues.

Yeah, that is getting ridiculous. I've lost count of the number of stag parties that now involve a weekend away in Eastern Europe/Amsterdam. My stag do/leaving Ireland party was to consist of go-karting and then a meal and drinks after so no one was priced out.

 Soladrin wrote:
Marriage is stupid anywayon. "ducks"

Seriously, the only reason I'd ever get maried is if it would be helpful with taxes and stuff like that, and it would just be us going to the local office, signing a slip of paper and going to the local pub to celebrate, I'd buy a round for everyone and that's it.

Or maybe because you live 3,500 miles away, in separate countries and you want to be together

 Dreadclaw69 wrote:

 Kilkrazy wrote:
Going off at a tangent, the modern fashion for long distance stag weekends has become a excessive burden in cost and time for some of my younger friends and colleagues.

Yeah, that is getting ridiculous. I've lost count of the number of stag parties that now involve a weekend away in Eastern Europe/Amsterdam. My stag do/leaving Ireland party was to consist of go-karting and then a meal and drinks after so no one was priced out.

I wont even be able to have a real stag party, All my friends are hyper religious, no drinking nor gambling, nor strippers.

Sounds like fun...

hotsauceman1 wrote:

 Dreadclaw69 wrote:

 Kilkrazy wrote:
Going off at a tangent, the modern fashion for long distance stag weekends has become a excessive burden in cost and time for some of my younger friends and colleagues.

Yeah, that is getting ridiculous. I've lost count of the number of stag parties that now involve a weekend away in Eastern Europe/Amsterdam. My stag do/leaving Ireland party was to consist of go-karting and then a meal and drinks after so no one was priced out.

I wont even be able to have a real stag party, All my friends are hyper religious, no drinking nor gambling, nor strippers.

Kidnap the groom-to-be, let him loose in the woods, and supply your friends with paintball guns. provide the groom with a map and a flashlight, and explain that there will be a party if he evades you until dawn.

It's basically a recreation of Surviving the Game. Lots of fun. Dunno for the groom, but I hate weddings anyway.

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

 Dreadclaw69 wrote:

 Kilkrazy wrote:
Going off at a tangent, the modern fashion for long distance stag weekends has become a excessive burden in cost and time for some of my younger friends and colleagues.

Yeah, that is getting ridiculous. I've lost count of the number of stag parties that now involve a weekend away in Eastern Europe/Amsterdam. My stag do/leaving Ireland party was to consist of go-karting and then a meal and drinks after so no one was priced out.

I wont even be able to have a real stag party, All my friends are hyper religious, no drinking nor gambling, nor strippers.

Let us organise it! A dakka stag do! Guns, strong drink, strippers and 40k.

Or just have your own stag do! Go to a strip club and drink.

Our bachelor party traditions is to render the groom in question massively drunk and call it a night, in my particular family, small practical jokes are also appreciated. For example writing "Help me" in white out on the soles of my cousin's shoes. It was quite the laugh when he kneeled down for a brief prayer (and to sneak some tylenol for the hangover) at the alter while his bride was still getting ready.

I'm pretty sure the bride still hasn't forgiven me for that.

But I can concur with Soladrin on spending a fortune to celebrate the end of a man's life. As I said when I got ordained "I'm licensed to marry and bury and the ceremony's much the same"

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
I wont even be able to have a real stag party, All my friends are hyper religious, no drinking nor gambling, nor strippers.

I didn't have one, by choice.

The whole 'last night of freedom' mindset that seems so ingrained into our culture just (IMO) seems like approaching marriage with entirely the wrong expectations.

At the rehearsal for my wedding, the photographer didn't turn up. Someone said will it be all right? and I said don't worry, he's done plenty of funerals.

 insaniak wrote:

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
I wont even be able to have a real stag party, All my friends are hyper religious, no drinking nor gambling, nor strippers.

I didn't have one, by choice.

The whole 'last night of freedom' mindset that seems so ingrained into our culture just (IMO) seems like approaching marriage with entirely the wrong expectations.

Same here

 insaniak wrote:


The whole 'last night of freedom' mindset that seems so ingrained into our culture just (IMO) seems like approaching marriage with entirely the wrong expectations.

This is the appropriate serious criticism on the stag/hen/whatever you call'em nights. If you're approaching marriage like an execution or a life prison sentence you need to reconsider why you're getting married.

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
I wont even be able to have a real stag party, All my friends are hyper religious, no drinking nor gambling, nor strippers.

Mine was a combination stag and leaving do. But if your friends are very religious why not try;
- meal
- movie
- bowling
- paintball
- shooting range
- laser tag
- crazy golf
- go karts

 KalashnikovMarine wrote:
This is the appropriate serious criticism on the stag/hen/whatever you call'em nights. If you're approaching marriage like an execution or a life prison sentence you need to reconsider why you're getting married.

Pretty much this

 azazel the cat wrote:

hotsauceman1 wrote:

 Dreadclaw69 wrote:

 Kilkrazy wrote:
Going off at a tangent, the modern fashion for long distance stag weekends has become a excessive burden in cost and time for some of my younger friends and colleagues.

Yeah, that is getting ridiculous. I've lost count of the number of stag parties that now involve a weekend away in Eastern Europe/Amsterdam. My stag do/leaving Ireland party was to consist of go-karting and then a meal and drinks after so no one was priced out.

I wont even be able to have a real stag party, All my friends are hyper religious, no drinking nor gambling, nor strippers.

Kidnap the groom-to-be, let him loose in the woods, and supply your friends with paintball guns. provide the groom with a map and a flashlight, and explain that there will be a party if he evades you until dawn.

It's basically a recreation of Surviving the Game. Lots of fun. Dunno for the groom, but I hate weddings anyway.

That could be a good time. At least be sporting, though, and give him a cup so he isn't too crippled up for his wedding night.

On a side note, I just remembered this through the haze of booze trying to forget, one of the only fights the ex and I had during the wedding planning (I was in SERE for most of it thank the goddess, never thought I'd look back fondly on being held captive in the woods at -50f) was some of the money grubbing BS that just disgusted me. Even mostly harmless stuff like slipping the bride a dollar if you dance with her (and you're not the groom) to a tradition called "Kidnapping the Bride" or "Ransoming the Bride" wherein the bridesmaids drag the bride off somewhere and the maid of honor proceeds to negotiate for the bride's return, usually not until some amount of cash has been coughed up. When I was informed that that was being included in the plans I told her "Per my policy, the rest of the wedding will not negotiate with terrorists" and hung up.

She was not pleased, but damn it was funny.

 Dreadclaw69 wrote:

"That brings us to another question of wedding etiquette: Is it acceptable to share a private wedding spat with the public in the age of viral media?"

Acceptable? No.

Enjoyable by outsiders? Hell yes!!!

The guy sending it to the newspaper was just trying to help the two partners business, ie wedding, go public and increase their revenue stream. Like all public offerings, some hiccups are to be expected.

Wait, you wanted money for my invite?

 KalashnikovMarine wrote:

 insaniak wrote:


The whole 'last night of freedom' mindset that seems so ingrained into our culture just (IMO) seems like approaching marriage with entirely the wrong expectations.

This is the appropriate serious criticism on the stag/hen/whatever you call'em nights. If you're approaching marriage like an execution or a life prison sentence you need to reconsider why you're getting married.

This. So many times this. So many people enter marriage with the wrong idea. "Ball and Chain" "Last night of freedom" Etc etc. Even as a joke I would have been upset. I don't mind an excuse for a bit of partying with mates, but when it becomes basically joke about marriage... Well, if you hate it that much why are you doing it.

It seems to me that many people go in to marriage with the wrong ideas. People commiserating on a stag do, people expecting to make money out of weddings and people thinking a wedding is all about a dress and sparkles and looking good and that the actual "getting married" bit is an annoying necessity that slows down the party (Often the same people, I have found, that are shocked when they find out that sometimes married life not all peaches and rainbows and sometimes you will argue or whatever.)


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 KalashnikovMarine wrote:
"Kidnapping the Bride" or "Ransoming the Bride" wherein the bridesmaids drag the bride off somewhere and the maid of honor proceeds to negotiate for the bride's return, usually not until some amount of cash has been coughed up. When I was informed that that was being included in the plans I told her "Per my policy, the rest of the wedding will not negotiate with terrorists" and hung up.

Brilliant! Utter genius. I have a few eastern European friends (I believe it is an eastern European tradition). Ill have to suggest that to them when/if they get married.

Yeah there needs to be one of those videos they show when you're going to be working around industrial machinery or whatever for marriage that basically goes "Happily ever after is when you die, till then you have to live with each other"

Na, just get the registrar/justice of the peace/appointed religious person etc to ask the couple a simple multipul coice question:

Should an ideal married life be:

a) like a Disney film.
b) a hell where all freedom is gone
d) like having a house mate who forgives you for finishing the milk

When I got married (2010) my wife and I were already living together, so we didn't need gifts. We said if anyone wanted to give us anything, then we'd be happiest with the cash so we could put it towards our honeymoon.
Giving a gift was not the price of admission at our wedding...
We managed to go snowboarding for a week in finland for our honeymoon. We had some very nice guests

I felt out with some of my more distant relations - 2 of them said 'we're not coming if we can't bring our boyfriends'
I've never even met the boyfriends, nor seen my actual relations in about 15years. I was paying £35 a head - so I said thanks, you've just saved me £140.

I also had 3 stag nights. One for friends and family out for an evening in a local city.
One for my friends on the night before my wedding at a mates house - I wasn't allowed home as my wife was there so what was I supposed to do?
And Myself and 5 friends went to amsterdam for a weekend - me getting married was more of an excuse to go than it being an actual stag night...

I really hated it when people were telling me it was my last night of freedom. I've been in a commited relationship for the best part of ten years - I knew exactly what I was signing up to.
What does 'last night of freedom' even mean anyway?
That should be the night before you start seeing someone at all.

*EDIT* Sorry wrong thread! That will teach me to have muliple tabs open on Dakka!

Anyway I'm on the side of the guests here. The Brides sound like a pair of rude cows.

 Avatar 720 wrote:

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
They are your friends and they want to share their special day with you?

Friendship shouldn't require me to take out a loan in order to prove it.

Completely agree, my friends would be pissed if I had to give money to prove I like them

This is a horrendous overreaction by the brides. They should have politely thanked him and let it go.

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

 Dreadclaw69 wrote:

 Kilkrazy wrote:
Going off at a tangent, the modern fashion for long distance stag weekends has become a excessive burden in cost and time for some of my younger friends and colleagues.

Yeah, that is getting ridiculous. I've lost count of the number of stag parties that now involve a weekend away in Eastern Europe/Amsterdam. My stag do/leaving Ireland party was to consist of go-karting and then a meal and drinks after so no one was priced out.

I wont even be able to have a real stag party, All my friends are hyper religious, no drinking nor gambling, nor strippers.

Go skydiving.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 KalashnikovMarine wrote:
Our bachelor party traditions is to render the groom in question massively drunk and call it a night, in my particular family, small practical jokes are also appreciated. For example writing "Help me" in white out on the soles of my cousin's shoes. It was quite the laugh when he kneeled down for a brief prayer (and to sneak some tylenol for the hangover) at the alter while his bride was still getting ready.

I'm pretty sure the bride still hasn't forgiven me for that.

But I can concur with Soladrin on spending a fortune to celebrate the end of a man's life. As I said when I got ordained "I'm licensed to marry and bury and the ceremony's much the same"

That is so awesome!

 Soladrin wrote:
Marriage is stupid anywayon. "ducks"

Seriously, the only reason I'd ever get maried is if it would be helpful with taxes and stuff like that, and it would just be us going to the local office, signing a slip of paper and going to the local pub to celebrate, I'd buy a round for everyone and that's it.

Who the hell want's to spend a years wage on a party to celebrate the end of a man's life?

Aren't you already married for tax purposes?