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Granted you now have the urge to attach her to fireworks and launch her into the sky.

I wish eldar got retconned out of the fluff and were replaced with squats.

Granted. But then Chuck Norris comes to your house and tells you to stop making stoopid gak up, before roundhouse kicking you.

I wish to bang Lofn.

Granted. Here have a Glock 9mm

I wish I spoke and understood Cantonese flawlessly.

Granted, but you end up stranded in a mandarin speaking region.

I wish I had the funds for all the projects that occur to me

Granted but you drown in money.

I wish i could fire infants from my mouth

Granted, the heartbreak after you spit your son over a cliff edge breaks you

I wish I had bought the models I wanted before they disappeared from the website

Granted but gw sends you similar but wrong models.

I wish I was less terrified of /tg/

Granted. You are now terrified of butterflies, flowers, and the sun

Wish to get my 1000th post

Hey whaddaya know? I got my wish!

Granted, the next targets 10,000 have fun.

I wish I could resist buying more models and books so I could finally diminish the piles

Granted. All you buy now is Carrots. Lots and lots of carrots. Enjoy your life as a bunny

Granted you attain nothing.

I wish to no longer be terrified of the sun

Granted. Instead, you have to bang Lofn, she's so cute.

I wish i could see the fireworks from here.

Granted. but you hear them as if you were in amongst the launchers.

I wish I had a dollar for every Walmart Employee who is un-aware of Sam Walton's 10 foot rule.

Granted, over enthusiastic employees won't leave you alone

No wish. You are mercilessly subjected to the antics of Singyourlife.

I wish the fireworks were not over until next year.

Granted, fireworks are let off 24/7, 365 days of the year. After 2months everyone hates them and are now deaf.


I wish I had known Babylon 5 had release a miniatures game back when I actually had the money to buy them.

Granted, you knew, had money and it was pants.

I wish my paints hadn't dried out during a hobby blip

Granted. They exploded instead.

I wish i had a decent Avatar.

Granted, It is decent at best, but you get a DMCA for every avatar you use as somebody or company has a copyright on all the images you use.

I wish I would smile more at people.

Granted. You are a happy Jack 'O Lantern.

I wish everyone was a Happy Jack 'O Lantern.

Granted, we are all happy jack-o-lanterns. In a few hours, days at most, our candles will go out, and the world will be seeped in darkness. Then, after a few days or weeks we will all being to rot, eventually all dying a slow, agonizing death. Seriously, jack-o-lanterns dont last long
I wish for the power to refill things

Granted. You get to refill the candles in all the rotten pumpkins.

I wish a horse was available.

Granted. You get a charlie-horse.
I wish the US would build a mecha!

Granted. They build a Mecha. But then they cut the funding and it just sits there.
I wish for another beer.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down, pass it around . . . And so on into eternity.

I wish that tau were in Eternal Crusade

Granted, but they get nerfed because everyone complaint on how OP the where.

I wish to be a werewolf

Granted. You are captured and dissected by scientists.

I wish to fly my RC chopper today.

Granted, but it doesn't work.

I wish to have boobs.

Granted. They are on top of your head, replacing your hair.

I wish i had all of the Cards Against Humanity expansions, including the fan made ones.

Granted The convergence of all those cards cause them to gain sentience and they kill you as their first step toward global domination.

I wish Sanctuary would come back on with new seasons.