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Made in gb
[DCM]
Et In Arcadia Ego





Canterbury

...... avoided a nut reference/joke in the title ! 10 Dakka internet points to me.

http://sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com/2015/12/04/novato-couple-recount-terrifying-squirrel-attack/


NOVATO (CBS-SF) – The last thing Richard Williams expected when he started doing chores in the garage of his Novato home the day after Thanksgiving was that he would soon be in a life-and-death battle with a crazed squirrel.

The 87-year-old Williams said the squirrel that has been terrorizing the neighborhood slipped into the garage through an open door.

“He charged me and jumped, and from then on, the battle started,” he told KPIX CBS 5.

The squirrel turned Williams’ head, arm and legs bloody. It also smashed his glasses.

“He was really vicious. He was clawing and scratching,” he said. “I was trying to get him off. Every time I’d get him off, he’d jump back up again.”

His 83-year-old wife, Norma, heard his screams and raced to his aid. When she saw her bloodied husband, she picked up a broom and joined the battle.

“I grabbed the broom, picked it up,” she said. “I guess I hit the squirrel with it.”

Still the attack continued.

“And then he jumped her,” Richard Williams said. “I was able to grab him by the tail, threw him on the garage floor and he seemed stunned.”

The squirrel then raced off and a neighbor came to the couple’s aid, bringing them to a hospital for treatment of their wounds.

Both were bandaged up and given dozens of shots including vaccines for rabies and tetanus.

The same squirrel is suspected of attacking five others in the last two weeks in the surrounding neighborhood including a teacher and student at Pleasant Valley Elementary.

Animal control officers have been patrolling the area, searching for the squirrel. Warning flyers have also been posted.



related :

http://sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com/2015/12/01/aggressive-squirrel-attacks-kindergarten-class-in-mill-valley/


NOVATO (KPIX 5) – A badly behaved squirrel got into a kindergarten classroom in Novato and caused quite a ruckus.

Pleasant Valley School principal Dana Sadan sent a letter home to parents in November explaining how the aggressive squirrel ran up the 2nd grade teacher’s leg and bit her on the shoulder.

The teacher grabbed the critter and threw it off of her. The squirrel then scurried across the hall into another classroom where it bit one child and landed on the shoulder of another. Finally, the school custodian arrived and managed to remove it from the classroom.

“The squirrel sneaked into the hall, into the open door and bit the kid and [the teacher],” said Charlotte Miller, a young student at the school.

By the time The Marin Humane Society arrived and tried to locate the squirrel, it had taken off into the open space area near the school.

“It’s a very unusual behavior for squirrels,” said Lisa Bloch of the Marin Humane Society. “We’ve been receiving several notifications of squirrel attacks, actually. In a particular neighborhood in Novato there have been eight victims.”

Novato officials said there has been a spike in squirrel attacks in recent weeks. They blame the aggressive behavior on humans who try to feed them. Once the squirrels associate people with food they become more prone to aggression.

“I should have never pet that squirrel,” said Kennedy Francis, one of Miller’s classmates. Miller couldn’t believe her friend’s revelation.

“You did?!?” said Miller.

“I feeded it – I pet it. What?” Francis asked.

“Don’t leave any food on the ground!” said Miller.

“I won’t,” replied Francis.

“I mean your food AND my food,” Francis added.

The school sent messages to all families explaining the attack and reassuring everyone it was an isolated event. They also warned students not to feed the animals.

“If a wild animal gets the idea that humans provide food, somehow they get it in their head that all humans provide food. Which means they go up to all people and then when they don’t get food from everyone, they can become aggressive about it,” said Alison Hermance of Wildcare.

Both the student and teacher who were bitten are seeking medical treatment. So far, there is no indication the squirrel had rabies.




blimey eh ?


perhaps this -- AFAIK -- as yet still unreleased movie gem was onto something all along



The poor man really has a stake in the country. The rich man hasn't; he can go away to New Guinea in a yacht. The poor have sometimes objected to being governed badly; the rich have always objected to being governed at all
We love our superheroes because they refuse to give up on us. We can analyze them out of existence, kill them, ban them, mock them, and still they return, patiently reminding us of who we are and what we wish we could be.
"the play's the thing wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king,
 
   
Made in fr
Tzeentch Veteran Marine with Psychic Potential





So ISIS is now recruiting squirrels.

Filthy terrorists. I'm sure those squirrels went into the country as refugees.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2015/12/09 10:39:49


Scientia potentia est.

In girum imus nocte ecce et consumimur igni.
 
   
Made in jp
[MOD]
Anti-piracy Officer






Somewhere in south-central England.

They might be rabid.

I'm writing a load of fiction. My latest story starts here... This is the index of all the stories...

We're not very big on official rules. Rules lead to people looking for loopholes. What's here is about it. 
   
Made in us
5th God of Chaos! (Yea'rly!)




The Great State of Texas

You have a squirrel problem?

I have a cure.


-"Wait a minute.....who is that Frazz is talking to in the gallery? Hmmm something is going on here.....Oh.... it seems there is some dispute over video taping of some sort......Frazz is really upset now..........wait a minute......whats he go there.......is it? Can it be?....Frazz has just unleashed his hidden weiner dog from his mini bag, while quoting shakespeares "Let slip the dogs the war!!" GG
-"Don't mind Frazzled. He's just Dakka's crazy old dude locked in the attic. He's harmless. Mostly."
-TBone the Magnificent 1999-2014, Long Live the King!
 
   
Made in us
Fixture of Dakka






Michigan squirrel - Farm pest usually shot on sight.

California squirrel - Rabid man-killer that terrorizes neighborhoods by preying on children and the elderly in a bloody wave of violence.

Either the squirrels we have here are orders of magnitude less capable than the ones in California, or people in California are orders of magnitude less capable than the people we have here...


"The Omnissiah is my Moderati" 
   
Made in jp
[MOD]
Anti-piracy Officer






Somewhere in south-central England.

Just be thankful you don't live in Australia.

The problem there is not that wild animals have got the idea that humans will provide food so much as that humans are food.

I'm writing a load of fiction. My latest story starts here... This is the index of all the stories...

We're not very big on official rules. Rules lead to people looking for loopholes. What's here is about it. 
   
Made in us
5th God of Chaos! (Yea'rly!)




The Great State of Texas

 Kilkrazy wrote:
Just be thankful you don't live in Australia.

The problem there is not that wild animals have got the idea that humans will provide food so much as that humans are food.


When I was in law school. I would sit at a specific table outside every second day and feed a clearly old squirrel the better part of an apple, and on fridays a little popcorn treat. He would sit on my shoulder and we would study Con Law together. Oh crap its dusty in the office today, I appear to have gotten dust in my eyes.

-"Wait a minute.....who is that Frazz is talking to in the gallery? Hmmm something is going on here.....Oh.... it seems there is some dispute over video taping of some sort......Frazz is really upset now..........wait a minute......whats he go there.......is it? Can it be?....Frazz has just unleashed his hidden weiner dog from his mini bag, while quoting shakespeares "Let slip the dogs the war!!" GG
-"Don't mind Frazzled. He's just Dakka's crazy old dude locked in the attic. He's harmless. Mostly."
-TBone the Magnificent 1999-2014, Long Live the King!
 
   
Made in us
Legendary Master of the Chapter





SoCal

 Alex C wrote:
Michigan squirrel - Farm pest usually shot on sight.

California squirrel - Rabid man-killer that terrorizes neighborhoods by preying on children and the elderly in a bloody wave of violence.

Either the squirrels we have here are orders of magnitude less capable than the ones in California, or people in California are orders of magnitude less capable than the people we have here...



There is a much larger and more aggressive nonnative species edging out our normal squirrels. These things get almost as big as housecats, and they have become a serious problem at outdoor seating areas near cafes and restaurants. We also have the adorable type of squirrels, but they don't make headlines.

   
Made in us
Member of the Ethereal Council






Here in SC, the Squirrels have some balls of steel. I was one attack a family of racoons for their pop tarts. I saw one get on the bus, ride it to the stop, get off and join afamily if squirrels
 Frazzled wrote:
 Kilkrazy wrote:
Just be thankful you don't live in Australia.

The problem there is not that wild animals have got the idea that humans will provide food so much as that humans are food.


When I was in law school. I would sit at a specific table outside every second day and feed a clearly old squirrel the better part of an apple, and on fridays a little popcorn treat. He would sit on my shoulder and we would study Con Law together. Oh crap its dusty in the office today, I appear to have gotten dust in my eyes.

Does this story end with the Squirrel becoming you Law Partner and the two of you opening a Practice together?

5000pts 6000pts 3000pts
 
   
Made in au
Homicidal Veteran Blood Angel Assault Marine




Oz

So, the apocalypse is coming, and it won't be war or disease or zombies, but squirrels. Who'd have thought?

 
   
Made in us
Fixture of Dakka




My father in law down in East Texas was bitten by a Squirrel and it messed him up pretty good for a couple of years. I don't know what kind of disease it had, but it wrecked his ability to remember things.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/12/09 22:15:17


 
   
Made in us
5th God of Chaos! (Yea'rly!)




The Great State of Texas

You had a father in law in East Texas? That alone will mess you up.

I have a father in law in East Texas. This means we're related. Bro!

-"Wait a minute.....who is that Frazz is talking to in the gallery? Hmmm something is going on here.....Oh.... it seems there is some dispute over video taping of some sort......Frazz is really upset now..........wait a minute......whats he go there.......is it? Can it be?....Frazz has just unleashed his hidden weiner dog from his mini bag, while quoting shakespeares "Let slip the dogs the war!!" GG
-"Don't mind Frazzled. He's just Dakka's crazy old dude locked in the attic. He's harmless. Mostly."
-TBone the Magnificent 1999-2014, Long Live the King!
 
   
Made in us
Fixture of Dakka




 Frazzled wrote:
You had a father in law in East Texas? That alone will mess you up.

I have a father in law in East Texas. This means we're related. Bro!


It's funny, I'm from Northern Maine and my wife is from a tiny town down in East Texas, we both grew up on farms and the areas we are from are similar. That is if you ignore the fact it's winter where I'm from about 8 months of the year and the Gators where she's from...

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/12/09 22:32:29


 
   
Made in us
Androgynous Daemon Prince of Slaanesh





Norwalk, Connecticut

 Kilkrazy wrote:
They might be rabid.


Or they might just be badass.

Reality is a nice place to visit, but I'd hate to live there.

Manchu wrote:I'm a Catholic. We eat our God.


Due to work, I can usually only ship any sales or trades out on Saturday morning. Please trade/purchase with this in mind.  
   
Made in gb
Longtime Dakkanaut





 Frazzled wrote:
When I was in law school. I would sit at a specific table outside every second day and feed a clearly old squirrel the better part of an apple, and on fridays a little popcorn treat. He would sit on my shoulder and we would study Con Law together. Oh crap its dusty in the office today, I appear to have gotten dust in my eyes.
When I was at school, there was a wooden shelter by the tennis courts where I would go to smoke cigarettes. There were a few squirrels there which I would feed whatever I had on me (usually chips). It took me ages to lure one up onto my shoulder... Turns out they have surprisingly sharp little claws! Having a squirrel run up your arm is much more painful and far less adorable than I had been expecting.


This message was edited 5 times. Last update was at 2015/12/10 07:04:21


 
   
Made in us
Grim Dark Angels Interrogator-Chaplain






A Protoss colony world

I always knew squirrels were up to no good. I've always referred to them as vermin, but now I perhaps should call them Apex Predators! Seriously, why the hell would a squirrel, which is usually a pretty small animal, want to attack a creature as large as a human being? I have to think it was insane or something.

My armies (re-counted and updated on 11/7/24, including modeled wargear options):
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Check out my P&M Blogs: ZergSmasher's P&M Blog | Imperial Knights blog | Board Games blog | Total models painted in 2024: 40 | Total models painted in 2025: 25 | Current main painting project: Tomb Kings
 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
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The Grotsnik Corp Bump Feelerer 9,000. It only looks like several bricks crudely gaffer taped to a cricket bat.
Grotsnik Corp. Sorry, No Refunds.
 
   
Made in us
5th God of Chaos! (Yea'rly!)




The Great State of Texas

 Smacks wrote:
 Frazzled wrote:
When I was in law school. I would sit at a specific table outside every second day and feed a clearly old squirrel the better part of an apple, and on fridays a little popcorn treat. He would sit on my shoulder and we would study Con Law together. Oh crap its dusty in the office today, I appear to have gotten dust in my eyes.
When I was at school, there was a wooden shelter by the tennis courts where I would go to smoke cigarettes. There were a few squirrels there which I would feed whatever I had on me (usually chips). It took me ages to lure one up onto my shoulder... Turns out they have surprisingly sharp little claws! Having a squirrel run up your arm is much more painful and far less adorable than I had been expecting.




Yep a squirrel up close looks like a furrier version of Wolverine. Yowsa.

-"Wait a minute.....who is that Frazz is talking to in the gallery? Hmmm something is going on here.....Oh.... it seems there is some dispute over video taping of some sort......Frazz is really upset now..........wait a minute......whats he go there.......is it? Can it be?....Frazz has just unleashed his hidden weiner dog from his mini bag, while quoting shakespeares "Let slip the dogs the war!!" GG
-"Don't mind Frazzled. He's just Dakka's crazy old dude locked in the attic. He's harmless. Mostly."
-TBone the Magnificent 1999-2014, Long Live the King!
 
   
Made in us
Battlefield Tourist




MN (Currently in WY)

 ZergSmasher wrote:
I perhaps should call them Apex Predators!


Prepare for the coming of Godzilla to sort this all out.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/12/10 18:42:19


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Made in us
The Conquerer






Waiting for my shill money from Spiral Arm Studios

Godzilla vs Daemon Squirrel, coming soon in 3D!

Self-proclaimed evil Cat-person. Dues Ex Felines

Cato Sicarius, after force feeding Captain Ventris a copy of the Codex Astartes for having the audacity to play Deathwatch, chokes to death on his own D-baggery after finding Calgar assembling his new Eldar army.

MURICA!!! IN SPESS!!! 
   
Made in ca
Mekboy on Kustom Deth Kopta






 
   
Made in de
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Ban all squirrels.

   
Made in us
Gore-Soaked Lunatic Witchhunter




Seattle

Many have fallen prey to the phenomenon known as Squirrely Wrath. The internet warned us about this years ago.

It is best to be a pessimist. You are usually right and, when you're wrong, you're pleasantly surprised. 
   
Made in gb
Soul Token




West Yorkshire, England

This sort of thing is more common than you might think:

Spoiler:



"The 75mm gun is firing. The 37mm gun is firing, but is traversed round the wrong way. The Browning is jammed. I am saying "Driver, advance." and the driver, who can't hear me, is reversing. And as I look over the top of the turret and see twelve enemy tanks fifty yards away, someone hands me a cheese sandwich." 
   
Made in us
Legendary Master of the Chapter





SoCal

That must be a parody or homage of this classic.



I can't believe how many rodents have a taste for men.


(And here come the Rescue Rangers images...)

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2015/12/10 22:10:19


   
Made in us
Gore-Soaked Lunatic Witchhunter




Seattle

I can't believe how many rodents have a taste for men.


The commission-related horrors I could speak of related to vore-porn, but as this is a PG-13 forum, I won't.

It is best to be a pessimist. You are usually right and, when you're wrong, you're pleasantly surprised. 
   
Made in jp
[MOD]
Anti-piracy Officer






Somewhere in south-central England.

There are flying squirrels in Japan.

I'm writing a load of fiction. My latest story starts here... This is the index of all the stories...

We're not very big on official rules. Rules lead to people looking for loopholes. What's here is about it. 
   
Made in us
Esteemed Veteran Space Marine




My secret fortress at the base of the volcano!

There are Russian black squirrels in parts of Frederick County, MD. Local legend has it that they were lab animals at Fort Detrick which were released (or escaped) from either the cancer research labs or the bioweapon research labs. Either way, I'm not about to let one of them bite me.

Emperor's Eagles (undergoing Chapter reorganization)
Caledonian 95th (undergoing regimental reorganization)
Thousands Sons (undergoing Warband re--- wait, are any of my 40K armies playable?) 
   
Made in us
Androgynous Daemon Prince of Slaanesh





Norwalk, Connecticut

squidhills wrote:
There are Russian black squirrels in parts of Frederick County, MD. Local legend has it that they were lab animals at Fort Detrick which were released (or escaped) from either the cancer research labs or the bioweapon research labs. Either way, I'm not about to let one of them bite me.


But you could gain squirrel powers and become Squirrel Girl!! And become a Great Lakes Avenger! Or join Spidey's Ultimate team in the SHIELD Triskelion. Good God, man! Think of the possibilities.

Reality is a nice place to visit, but I'd hate to live there.

Manchu wrote:I'm a Catholic. We eat our God.


Due to work, I can usually only ship any sales or trades out on Saturday morning. Please trade/purchase with this in mind.  
   
Made in us
Humming Great Unclean One of Nurgle






Not too many squirrels here in San Diego. The crows and seagulls are waaaaaay better than them at what they do. I have watched groups of seagulls orbit above a given camp on the beach and wait for all the humans to leave before tearing the spot apart and taking all the food in the space of two minutes. I swear, they know some way to determine tourists from locals (who know better).

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I chose an avatar I feel best represents the quality of my post history.

I try to view Warhammer as more of a toolbox with examples than fully complete games. 
   
Made in jp
Fixture of Dakka





Japan

Zombie epidemic starts with a squirrel?

Squidbot;
"That sound? That's the sound of me drinking all my paint and stabbing myself in the eyes with my brushes. "
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