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You receive a copy of Mass Effect 2, 3, the comics and the novels. They don't nick name it Mass Erect for nuthin'.

I insert some moonshine.

You get some Night Goblins.

I insert a CRASSUS ARMORED ASSAULT TRANSPORT!

You get one of the old school Space marine rhino's

I insert Roadhouse!

You get someone who thought it was a reference to Family Guy.

I insert an old school Space Marine rhino.

You get a taurox.

I inserted an imperial knight.

You get a killer kan.

I insert fireworks.

You get a flakk missile launcher.

I insert a Chaos Space Marine... 's codpiece.

You get grabbed, and dragged in by tentacles.

I wait to see what comes out after the last guy got sucked in.

You get a Japanese businessman.

I insert a hipster.

You get Hitler.

I inserted a closet.

You get a nightstand.

I insert a side table

You get a side table in 153 pieces, and the instructions on how to assemble it.

I insert a flaming skull.

The skull comes out in a thousand fragments, all lit on plasma fire.

I insert a twenty foot solid gold statue in the form of the Emperor.

You get Warhammer Visions magazine.

I insert a beehive.

You get Nicolas Cage.

I insert a Reaper bones miniature of Cthulhu.

You get a failcast jabberslythe.

I insert a comb.

But is a bone from a water demon that comes out of the comb to drown you in the sink.

I insert a watermelon in the shape of a pumpkin

You receive an apple in the shape of a pea.

I insert David Bowie.

Everyone [not just you] gets got.

I inserted spiderman.

You get a spider, man.

I insert a toad.

You receive the artist formerly known as Prince.

I insert a jump pack.

You receive a Space Marine jump rope that is thrice blessed and sanctified by the Mechanicus.

I insert delicious cake

You get a burp.

I insert the next person's avatar.

Grumpy Cat eats your face.

I insert Guardsmen Bob, but only his nether regions.

You get an endless tide of unspeakable filth.

I insert my penis.

You get a well-writhen 40k fapfiction

I insert a sexy Skaven.

You a brood horror.

Inserted a SM scout sniper rifle.

You get Steve Blum

I go to insert a cat, but ninjas attack. My head flies from my body and into the machine.

You recieved a new comissar's cap

I insert my hand

You get a power fist.

I insert a box of cigars.