Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

My wife has no problem with my hobby, she buys me stuff on occasion. She likes that I have a hobby I can do so I dont pester her while she is reading, doing an oil painting, drawing or doing some other art project, or watching one of her programmes.

My girlfriend encourages (nags) me to buy things that she thinks are cool (and they are ) - so thanks to her I got into 40k ... bought a chaos reaver and right now she's really into Death Korps of Krieg ... what can I say - I just love her

Question: How does your spouse view your 40k hobby?

Answer: She thinks I am a massive geek.


There is probably some truth to this.

My wife is not the least bit interested in war gaming, but she's always supported me in the hobby. Holiday presents usually include some choice pieces I have trouble coughing up the dough for otherwise. Considering how much time I spend locked in the studio painting... she's about as supportive and you can get.

Do you wish your spouses/girlfriends/fiances were more involved? Or do you mostly prefer them to be "into their own things?" Mostly I'd like to know what you have in common with them if it's not wargaming. (and i don't mean the obvious thing)

loranafaeriequeen wrote:Do you wish your spouses/girlfriends/fiances were more involved? Or do you mostly prefer them to be "into their own things?" Mostly I'd like to know what you have in common with them if it's not wargaming. (and i don't mean the obvious thing)

I would love for my wife to get involved but after several aborted attempts, I am resigned to the fact that it just ain't gonna happen. She briefly showed an interest in painting but swiftly became bored. She has shown little interest in the games beyond one game of Space Hulk (that she played to stop me mithering mainly). she also fell asleep during the Ultramarines movie.

I think I'm in your boat too filbert.

Meh, I don't need her to be more involved than she is. I have my 40k, she has her horses. I'm into Halloween, she's into Christmas. I gregarious & make it up as I go along... she plots and plans behind-the-scenes. The fact that we have different interests isn't a problem at all, in fact our differing strengths and aptitudes make us a more formidable team than if we were carbon copies of each other.

loranafaeriequeen wrote:Do you wish your spouses/girlfriends/fiances were more involved? Or do you mostly prefer them to be "into their own things?" Mostly I'd like to know what you have in common with them if it's not wargaming. (and i don't mean the obvious thing)

I wouldn't mind if she wanted to paint a bit or play a game here and there but otherwise I'm quite content that we have different hobbies and don't have to do every single thing together. I believe that it's important that you have different interests and hobbies even if your a couple/married etc

loranafaeriequeen wrote:
Do you wish your spouses/girlfriends/fiances were more involved? Or do you mostly prefer them to be "into their own things?" Mostly I'd like to know what you have in common with them if it's not wargaming. (and i don't mean the obvious thing)


I would absolutely love it if Mrs. Poontangler would play some games with me, it would mean I could war game at home and not have to leave.

But you also have to remember 40k is not the only interest I have. Me and my better half have many shared interests. We also have our own things

Mrs. Snurl always likes to look at what I'm painting. Over the years she has given me three nice display cabinets to keep my figures in. But she doesn't game, she has her own hobbies.
Around Christmastime she always asks me to paint something on her fingernails. I have painted grinches, christmas trees, santas, angels, pointsettas, snowmen, and all sorts of things on there. Her mom likes hers done too. Always good for an extra present or two.

My wife calls them "my little army dudes." She doesn't have a problem with what I spend on them, because she has a horse that is twice as expensive as all of my hobbies combined.

She's really not interested at all in creating her army, as she hates painting.

loranafaeriequeen wrote:Do you wish your spouses/girlfriends/fiances were more involved? Or do you mostly prefer them to be "into their own things?" Mostly I'd like to know what you have in common with them if it's not wargaming. (and i don't mean the obvious thing)

That is a very good couple of questions.

I think it would be nice if the missus was more involved, but it doesn't bother me that she isn't. I love spending time with her though, so I do some hobbying in the living room when we're watching movies, and our computer is in the hobby room so I can paint while she watches Hulu or plays wolfenstien.

To your second question, asside from both liking to read, watch movies and spend time together, nothing about our specific leisure hobbies was do we have in common. Our commonalities are around faith, priorities, values, lifestyle, politics, and asthetic taste (in home decor, fashion, etc). Shared hobbies would be nice, but they aren't what you build a marriage around (the first 3 things in my list and alot of quality time and communication are).

poontangler wrote:Today me and my fiancée were talking about my 40k army; by talking of course, she was making fun of my tau forces that stood in defense of my dinner table.

She calls them my "Gnomes" and often makes wise cracks and rolls her eyes when I go off to play or play at my home.

So I pose this question to my fellow gamers: What does your other half(If that applies, as some of us are lucky enough to be single) about your hobby?

married 21 years.

She supports me, even if she doesn't understand it always. Doesn't make fun, but will not feign an interest herself.

I could be a bad father, bad husband, go out and blow $100.00 a night at a bar drinking, but I don't. She appreciates that, and that is how she shows her appreciation.

My girlfriend (Who's getting to the point of becoming my wife.) thinks it's "adorable" that a big country boy likes to paint little war dudes. She's sat down and painted 3 with me, which turned out to be awesome. She's even bought me things for the hobby, and though she always buys stuff that I cant use, I paint them for practice or build a diorama with them.

The wife views it with tolerance/disinterest/patience - but definitely prefers it over long PS3 sessions.

My wife loves to play board games with me and likes to by me gaming presents for christmas/birthday but mainly is disinterested. Which is how I like it gives us a chance to have seperate but equal lives caus emost of my time is spent with her or the kid or both.

She's supportive of my hobbies and will sometimes paint a bit too. She isn't into wargaming but loves fantasy and RPG and prefers that kind of gaming which I'm more leaning towards myself as wargaming with large armies becomes prohibitively expensive, well with GW miniatures anyway.

loranafaeriequeen wrote:Do you wish your spouses/girlfriends/fiances were more involved? Or do you mostly prefer them to be "into their own things?" Mostly I'd like to know what you have in common with them if it's not wargaming. (and i don't mean the obvious thing)

At times, sure, but honestly I'm happy that we have some separate stuff. I need time to chill and do things on my own sometimes. Painting is my private time.

My wife is GREAT about my hobbies.

I only receive mildly contemptuous comments for my multiple "1 am" mornings during the week when I stay up late watching the Bartertown forums, packing boxes of trades (the skreech of packing tape at midnight has awakened her in a panic on more than one occasion in our marriage), painting my little men and the like.

She let me dedicate about 600 sq ft of our basement to a gaming-centric Man Cave.

Almost every Saturday, from noonish until whenever the heck I get home (usuallt midnight to 2 am), I'm out at a buddy's house playing 40K, or have my monthly 2e AD&D group over at the house (for whom she cooks dinner).

For all this, I have but to suffer the occasional "geek" joke.

If helps that she knows that, though I spend a lot of time involved in my hobbies in one fashion or another, they really do take a back seat to real life. I'd cancel gaming in a heartbeat if necessary and I'd sell every last gaming item I own, if we needed the money for something important, without even hesitating.

Eric

Frazzled wrote:Its viewed as better than if I were hanging out in a bar.

That's another funny thing about my wife... She would honestly rather see me go out to a bar, have a drink or two, and BS with my friends out there doing stuff that doesn't involve "gaming"... And honestly, I can't think of a better and safer (while not necessarily cheaper) way of spending a night than gaming with friends.

And to answer the recent question about whether I wished she would be more involved?

I think it would be fun. Someone voiced earlier that they wouldn't have to travel elsewhere to game, but that's just a small perk, IMHO. If she were to get into gaming, and maybe learn to appreciate what I consider to be fun, then she'd probably understand why I enjoy it. But getting her to game for a little while in of itself is a challenge, let alone just getting her to understand why I like it.

*sigh*... Oh well, perhaps time will tell.

My girl does not mind the pretty art work or painted miniatures being a tattoo artist herself. She puts up with my stories about a recent game or arguments on Dakka i see or me showing her nice painted minis via the laptop. But when a group of gamers show up at the house she generally stays away or shouts "QUIET DOWN NERD HERD !"

LOL
My wife would totally do that!

Eric

My boyfriend plays the tau so our only issue is his always losing and claiming he went easy on me.

My wife is very supportive. So supportive in fact that she's learning 40k so that my group will have 4 players for the UK doubles next year.

My partner is rather negative on the whole thing, to the point I pray that she doesn't want to go shopping when I'm on my way to gamesworkshop because I know she'll follow me and stand there in the shop saying something like "oh god, I'm the only woman in here, I wonder how many of these guys are virgins", she's not very subtle. She even does it in shops like gamestation.

aside from that, she does pretend to listen to me when I rant about my little toys, and will even praise my work if I have completed a nice little conversion/paintjob. And we don't argue too much about the financial aspect, since I allways remind her how many shoe's and clothes she owns.

My wife is generally supportive. She will occasionally critique my painting and tolerate the stories I tell her. And I she bought me minis for Christmas so no complaints here.

Id give my left testicle for a geeky girlfriend with similar interests. I seem to attract those with opposite interests. Sigh.

that can be arranged... the former... not the latter.

Fortunately for me she has a Masters in Chemistry (even though she now works in marketting for Chem companies), so no matter what I do, it will never be as geeky as having a Masters in Chemistry lol!

In all seriousness though, she is fine with it and even makes efforts to be interested in what I'm working on, but obviously doesn't like it too much if I get too into it and end up not spending as much time with her as I should. To me, her wanting to spend time with me isnt bad or nagging. I would be far more worried if she didn't care, we are married after all lol!