corrupt a wish!

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**Breotan**

Dr. Temujin wrote:
I wish Games Workshop had price decreases for the next five years.

Granted. But your income and life savings decrease proportionally.

I wish Uma Thurman was better looking.

**snurl**

So does she.

I wish I hadn't looked.

**liquidjoshi**

Granted. You were too busy looking at mobidly obese men. In disturbing costumes...

I wish I could get around to writing.

**Breotan**

Granted. But you will only write about mobidly obese men in disturbing costumes... at anime conventions.

I wish the U. S. Government would fund recreational vacations to the moon.

**Squigsquasher**

Granted. Unfortunately, just as you arrive at the moon, Third Impact takes place, and as Giant Naked Rei collapses, everyone is showered with incredibly high pressure blood. The sheer amount and velocity of said blood effectivel obliterates everyone. The last thing everybody on the vacation sees is the most disturbing derp-face ever.

I wish I was better at Team Fortress 2.

**Dr. Temujin**

Granted. But then, everyone else gets better, too.
I wish I had a competitive Chaos Space Marine army in my garage. With my name on it.

**Breotan**

Granted. But the police have video of you stealing it so having your name on it only incriminates you further.

The other night upon my stair
I saw a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
I wish, I wish he'd go away.

**Far Seer**

Granted. He goes away from your stairs but to your surprise, you find him cuddled in your bed one sleepy night.

I wish I could sculpt well.

**Decio**

Granted, but you can only sculpt with fresh horse dung.
Also, you cannot block the smell as it stimulates your creative thinking.

I wish for a better way to finish all three of my projects due next week.

**snurl**

Granted. You integrate them into one mammoth project. But your instructors do not approve.

I wish for a good game tomorrow.

**Breotan**

Granted. Too bad you'll forget to watch it until it's over and you catch the score on the news.

I wish the Seahawks win next year's Superbowl.

**snurl**

Keep wishing.

I wish Dallas would win one again.

**Breotan**

Granted. But they're in the queue right after the Seahawks.

I wish no-money-down real estate schemes were legit.

**snurl**

Granted. Soon everyone is on TV 24/7 selling their get rich quick books.

I wish Killing orcs was always as much fun as it was tonight.

**master of ordinance**

Granted but all of the ork players refuse to face you.

I wish i could have seen my girlfriend this weekend (we where snowed apart sadly

)

**snurl**

Granted. You tunneled your way thru deep snow to see her take off with some dude on a snowmobile.

I wish for more orcs to kill.

**master of ordinance**

snurl wrote:
Granted. You tunneled your way thru deep snow to see her take off with some dude on a snowmobile.

I wish for more orcs to kill.

Granted but after years of killing nothing but orcs you can no longer go on.

I wish that i shot the dude on the snowmobile and rescue my girlfriend.

**snurl**

Granted. You did and you did, but now how to dispose of that body???

**PredaKhaine**

No wish. You are taken to eastbourne in the uk. You live the rest of your life surrounded by geriatrics telling you about incontinance problems.

I wish it wasn't both snowing and thawing at the same time here.
Stupid contradictory weather.

**master of ordinance**

Granted. I wish that too

I wish that i feed the body to feral chavs

**Breotan**

Granted. But they eat it faster than you were expecting and now you find yourself surrounded.

I wish this supid software I'm using would actually work as intended.

**Far Seer**

Granted. It was intended to frustrate you, so job complete I guess.

I wish USPS wouldn't raise its prices for international shipping.

**Breotan**

Granted. But only if you bought the "Forever International" stamps before the price increase.

I wish the USPS actually made "Forever International stamps before the price increase.

**Squigsquasher**

Granted, unfortunately you can only use them to send off coupons to get your very own King Harkinian. Dinner.

I wish my Squid Girl Figma would arrive sooner!

**snurl**

Granted. It arrives but the DVD is missing from the packaging.

I wish for warmer weather soon.

**Breotan**

Granted. But "soon" means another couple of months, instead of the several years that was to happen. Thanks, snurl, we dodged a bullet there.

I wish I really could dodge bullets.

**PredaKhaine**

Granted, you can now dodge bullets. But then you get hit in the face by a shoe.

I wish summer was here.

**master of ordinance**

Granted but you are gunned down before you can enjoy it.

I wish that i slaughtered the chavs with my Bastard Sword.

**snurl**

Granted. But noe thebastards want their sword back.

I wish for a new 3/0 brush.

**Far Seer**

We South Hemisphereans laugh at you North Hemisphereans

Granted. However it is not kolinsky sable, nor normal sable. It is the most frayed, disgusting synthetic brush you have ever seen.

I wish Rosemary and Co brushes were sold in Australia at a good price and quality.