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Granted, but you soon realize that it was more fun the other way.


I wish for a new leather jacket.

Granted. It's three sizes too small.

I wish for $2 million, untraceable, in a trust fund account.

Granted, however whenever you make a withdrawal you only ever get counterfeit or Confederate bills, checks inexplicably bounce, and nobody seems to accept whatever credit/debit cards you happen to have. Especially if the customer in front of you in line just used the same card

I wish that I had enough Orks to paint to field 2000 points, even if they're not competitive in the slightest.

Granted. Your orks arrive.

They are all cast in a metal recovered from the heart of a white dear and each one weighs hundreds of kilos for a single boy.

A stompa weights as much as a tank. Have fun taking them to a game.


I wish I had a comfey chair.

Granted. Your chair is the most comfortable chair in the world. You are unable to get up out of it. No matter what happens. You die in a house fire. If only you got up and ran.

I wish for more funny youtube content.

Granted. It's funny. To middle schoolers.

I wish for more dakka.

Granted. You receive more dakka. A lot more dakka. One might even dare to say that you have received enuff dakka. However it was sent your way at over 1000 meters per second.

I wish Orks became the most powerful army in 40k and stomped even Tau/Eldar into the dirt, WAAAGH!

Granted. They get new rules that make them so OP, that they are now the most hated army in the game. Other players refuse to play against them as they are now considered cheap and broken. Stigmatizing Ork players in the process. Ork armies are now banned from tournaments and other official battles until GW fixes them by making them completely unplayable.

I wish for another great flood. This time with no omissions.

Granted! The flood is great, spares no life and occurs on Mercury.

I wish I had a decent location to scuba dive near me.

Granted! It's only "decent", leaving you with a profound sense that something is missing.

I wish for all of the AoS fluff to be rewritten, to add Moar Lovecraft.

Granted. It is all added but swiftly retconned after so you have to buy all the books again and have hundreds of dollers worth of books that do not apply to any games.

I wish I did not have a head ache.

Granted. You break your big toe and soon for forget all about the headache.


I wish for a custom- made Telecaster.

Granted. It's custom made to look great but the sound is terrible and impossible to tune right.

I wish I could crucify people legaly.

Granted its legal for everyone.

Soo.. You do it to someone and do it to you in return .

I wish I has a cuddley squid right about now.

Granted. You get inked.


I wish I had a brand new jet ski.

Granted. Unfortunately it belonged to "Big" Tony Capreski who is tied to the Mob and they don't like it that it somehow ended up in your possesion. Neither does the FBI. Also none of the parties involved believe the "I got it from a thread on the internet" excuse. So die in a warehouse or die in jail?

I wish Tequila and Bonetti was actually aired for several seasons.

Granted! But it's immediately cancelled because the dog...the only reason to watch the show...has worms and needs to go into quarantine for 6 months.

I wish pencils were self-sharpening.

Granted. They reduce in size so rapidly you only do one letter with a single pencil.

I wish thr weekend was longer.

Granted. They're infinitely longer. Everyone is stuck in an eternal time loop of boredom.

I wish to forget that a certain diorama exists.

Granted. You forget it but you also forget where you hid the tresure map to the Templers slot gold and a multi billion doller fortune.

I wish I could remember where I parked my invisible batman car.

Granted. You remember blowing it to smithereens after you parked it too.

I wish for a good sandwich.

Granted The sandwich is your favorite with all the fixings. It is so good that all other food tastes bland and unappealing for the rest of your live.

 Verviedi wrote:
Granted. They're infinitely longer. Everyone is stuck in an eternal time loop of boredom.

I wish to forget that a certain diorama exists.

I wish to see that diorama Verviedi wished to forget exist three posts ago.

Granted. You lose faith in humanity and consider dropping the hobby due to the stunning fact that somebody actually made it.

I wish that I wasn't reminded of its existence by the above post.

Granted, but that's a paradox and the universe collapses into a black hole.

I wish for a box of AoS Saurus *Knights* for conversions. The mounted ones.

Granted. They are made from finecast.

I wish GW would do something cool again.

Granted. GW does something cool. Unfortunately the people who find it cool are your parents and thus it looses it coolness instantly.

I wish someone sent me a link to a picture of the diorama Verviedi is trying to forget excisted.

Granted. Unfortunately, they feth up the link and send you a lethal memetic hazard instead.

I wish for a volcano lair.

Granted. It promptly erupts.



I wish for an exciting and noteworthy spring break.

 Chaos Legionnaire wrote:
Granted. It promptly erupts.



I wish for an exciting and noteworthy spring break.

Granted...you forget it all. Spend several weeks in a mexican jail, and leave with several new tattos and a hooker girlfriend who dating you to get a green card.

...

I wish I had a nice hot chocolate. With cream and marshmellows in almost excellent mug with a pun on it.

Granted. It's made of hot chocolate, marshmallows, cream, and nanophage.

I wish for a new carpet, my old one is very ugly.