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Frazzled pops out, holds a wiener dog to your head, and demands all your Queso!

I insert Frazzled.

You receive a horde of weinys

I insert my usless tutor whom never actually teaches us anything

You get Matt Ward.
I insert a slinky.

You get some stairs.

I insert a reference so obscure, that only the grayest of neckbeards can understand it.

You recive a first printing of Chainmail.

I insert Cthulhu.

you receive tentacle related adult only graphical content

I insert a lightsaber

You receive a laser pointer LOS finder.
I insert some Zoats.

You get some goats on a boat looking for oats.

I insert MA LAZOR, BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

You get a small flashlight shaped like a heavy bolter.
I insert all the extra command bits.

You get molten plastic sprayed in your face.

I insert a chibi cow-thulu.

A tentacle emerges from the machine and drags you in, followed by nasty slurping noises.

I insert some aspirin.

A hammer comes flying out of the machine and hits you on the head giving you a killer headache. Bet you wish you hadn't got rid of that aspirin huh?

I put in a beer.

 snurl wrote:
You get a small flashlight shaped like a heavy bolter.

Awesome!


You get a dwarf.

I insert all my used voodoo dolls.

You receive a voodoo doll of yourself that has a permanently erect, um... Thing.
One more try, I jump in. I WILL NOT BE SERVITOR ALL MY LIFE.

You get yourself back in the reject coin slot.

I insert the Kremlin.

You receive the female gremlin from the second movie and a chastity belt two sizes two small for you.
I shout NOOO! Dramatically and shoot myself in the head. My body falls into the machine.

You are spat back out in a bucket of bloody body parts, alongside a CD compilation of dramatic deaths music through out the ages.

I insert a large pail of milk curds and a medium sized strawberry, alnogside a bottle of the finest mead.

You get an Arachnarok Spider.

I insert an Earthshaker Cannon.

The planet begins to shake. You are thrown off it forcefully.

I insert a wet dog.

You get a bucket of skunk spray.

I insert a starved honey badger.

You receive a unit of Bestigors.

I insert a set of Adeptus Mechanicus figures.

You get a STC on how to construct said figures.

I insert a bungee cord, and an owl.

You get a Gundam.

I insert Overpowered units.

VENDING MACHINE sent out GYRADOS! GYRADOS used NERD RAGE! Critical hit! It was more or less effective! OVERPOWERED UNITS used BROKEN! Critical hit to the feels! COOL KID rage quit the game! You just lost the game! You receive 320 poke-yen! You black out and wake up in front of a Pokecenter missing your wallet, your pokemon, and your pants.

I put in a pair of jeans. Wonder where those came from.

you get a pantless slaanesh marine.

I insert a normal vending machine.

The vending machine is rejected by the superior vending machine. It flies and hits you in the body. On it is a note, "Get that gak outta here."

I insert all the figures that have been broken between 1999 and 2009.

You get a tube of glue.
I insert anything but a one.

You get everything. literally everything. except the thing you were hoping for.

I vomit into the vending machine.

You get sucked in, and vomited out.

I insert a bucket of water, and soap to clean it.

You receive dirty feelings.
I insert a non sequitur.