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This is really amazing. I cant wait to see what else there is,

 Eldarain wrote:
Isn't Black Library recruiting right now? Just saying...

Thanks for the heads up man, I'll be entering this asap. The Deathwatch is a bit outside my usual area of interest, but I'm looking forward to making something hopefully worth reading

Really enjoyed the original - look forwards to the new version (hoping for a few new twists!).

This story is fantastic you've made it so life like its as if i am there.
I hope there will be more about the Biological children of the Emperor.

Keep it up

Just spent the day reading through the other forum your posted DLS and wow Cannot wait for more. This is going to be epic.

Can't make a death of the Emprah story without the true Sensei, no sirrah.

Another painful spasm gripped his abdomen, quickly followed by an acidic surge of bile and liquid out his mouth and into the marble sink. Its previous clean and shining surface was now stained a viscous brown as The High Lord vomited the previous night’s Arturian Caviar and Kal’pay Rice into the drain. The pain had come on suddenly, and although it was starting to fade, The High Lord could not shake the feeling that something dire had occurred, something he could not quantify but felt like a shadow over his shoulder. He turned the enamel taps on and splashed his mouth and face with cold water, washing the sticky corruption from his lips.

Staring into his reflection, the High Lord wondered had he aged visibly. Thanks to decades of rejuvenation treatments and psychic-massage he appeared no more than forty Terran year’s standard, however his eyes gave away his age and how tired he was. He ran his wet hands through his black hair, pushing the lengthy mess into a tight ponytail. He gazed into his reflection, and the longer he looked the more certain he was that something terrible was about to occur.

There was a knock on his chamber door.

He gripped the basin, his breath catching in his throat.

“Who…Who is it?” he called, his throat cracking and robbing his voice of its usual authority.

“It’s Samuels my Lord”

The High Lord sighed in relief. Samuels had been his family’s man-servant for over a century, and was one of the few individuals in the whole damned Imperium who he almost trusted. Straightening up and fixing his dishevelled appearance, the High Lord walked briskly to the ornate doors of his personal chambers placing his hand upon the ebony surface. Complex and minute circuitry read the bio-data from his palm and registered every inch of his hand, allowing the hidden locks to disengage with a quiet hiss. The doors swung open gently on hydraulic suspensors, opening out the palatial and stately halls beyond.

Samuels stood at the door, looking equally dishevelled as his master. His lined, tanned face was sallow and clammy and his eyes had the look of man who had not slept well in days. He leaned heavily on the frame of the door as opposed to his usual straight-backed demeanour, a breach in servant protocol that the High Lord was sure to question later. Samuels bowed shallowly, and cleared his throat.

“My Lord, you have received summons for council. The other High Lords wish to speak with you”

The High Lord checked the platinum-edged chronometer on the wall – it was the middle of the night. A shiver of indignation ran up his spine at the thought of being summoned at this late an hour. The High Lord’s previous feeling of queasiness and unease was replaced immediately by his usual haughty demeanour.

“Which High Lords Samuel, do they not realise what time it is?”

Samuels shuffled uncomfortably, conscious of how furious and ill his Lord appeared “All of them my Lord”

The High Lord blinked as if not understanding: all of them? The High Lords hadn’t met or talked as a full council in centuries, there had never been a need. Proxies and administrators had always sufficed, sparing the most important individuals in the Imperium the tedium of running it. The High Lord gave his manservant a withering gaze, silently questioning what he had just heard. Samuels nervously nodded, and gestured for his Lord to follow him to the Council Chamber.

Relenting, the High Lord followed his shuffling manservant down the gilded halls of his personal manse. Built millennia ago into the upper edifices of the Imperial Hive, the manse was a testament to The High Lord’s status and power. They made their way through halls of polished white marble, lined with cracks of delicate gold and silver. The walls were heavy with suspensor held portraits and landscapes of the High Lords family and lands, each piece worth more than the average Imperial citizen would ever see in their lifetime. They passed rooms lavishly furnished with ornately carved wooden fixtures, sumptuous chaise lounges made from Eagle down and softened grox hide, floating chandeliers of clear crystal and fractal light patterns and elaborate marble busts of the High Lord’s many young concubines. Such things were a natural reward for a man of his station, and each reminder of his position calmed the fire in the High Lord’s belly.

They approached the heavy, automated doors of the Council Chamber, the High Lord waiving the lobotomised gun servitors built into the walls away with a casual gesture. He placed his hand against its surface, and quiet circuitry built into its heavy frame hissed and chattered as it identified him. The High Lord turned to Samuels and gestured with his eyes for his servant to leave. Samuels bowed and shuffled back down the corridor, holding his stomach in a sickly fashion. When The High Lord was certain he was alone, he pressed the silver ingot of his ring to the door.

The heavy adamantium doors rumbled on heavy gears as they slid into the ceiling, revealing the darkened chamber beyond. The Council Chamber was not a chamber for physical meetings, as the demands of Imperial Governance drew the various members of the High Council across the Segmentum. The chamber beyond was designed to allow near faster than light communication between the separated High Lords, a cunning (and near heretical) design of the previous Fabricator-General Othrock Morr before his tragic demise centuries before. The room was long and thin, with a low dark ceiling festooned with projectors, lenses and machinery. A low table was set into the floor, with a metallic throne at the head which The High Lord lowered himself into. The proximity of his spinal cord to the intricate circuitry of the throne activated the chamber and around the table, ghostly blue images crackled into focus. Eleven constructs of holographic light focussed their gaze on The High Lord and he suddenly quailed.

The other eleven High Lords of Terra sat in front of the colleague for the first time in centuries, and they looked grim. The High Lord cleared his throat:

“My Lords, how pleasant to see you this eve. I must admit, I am surprised you would disturb me at this late hour, I trust this issue is of the utmost importance?”

“Be silent” snapped the ghostly image of the High Master of Assassins, her death-mask robbed of none of its cold fury by digital translation. “There is news that requires our attention, without your snide barbs”

The High Lord bristled at the insult, his eyes lighting with anger. The High Master of Assassin’s was a constant loose flame among them and showed no respect. Before he could rise to the bait, the Paternoval Envoy of the Noble Navigators cut in.

“There has been a development…it appears The Emperor is dead”

The High Lord looked at the hunched, ancient figure of the Envoy as if he had been slapped.

“Dead? That’s absurd! What do you mean dead?”

A metallic croak escaped the hulking figure of the Fabricator-General of Mars, its deep robes barely hiding the gross implants and industrial machinery leeching like tumours from its wasted form. Its voice was like glass dragging across concrete and caused the gathered lords to flinch.

“Dead: No longer living. The Emperor has ceased to function on an organic level”

The High Lord narrowed his eyes at the always literal machine-thing, illiciting no reaction from the deep folds of its hood. He let an exasperated hiss escape his lips before clarifying, panic edging his voice.

“I mean what happened? How did he die? None of you seem particularly alarmed by this!”

The Inquisitorial Representative raised his hands in a calming gesture, his smooth shaved head and shining eyes both strikingly handsome and monstrously dangerous. He wore deep cushioned sleeping robes, evidently he too had been awoken with this news.

“We are alarmed my friend, however the needs of the Imperium outweigh any personal misgivings we may have. We have discussed our best course of action and only require your vote on the matter.”

The High Lord folded his arms across his chest, “and what, might I ask, is our best course of action?”

The Inquisitorial Representative leant forward, his eyes boring into the High Lord. He smiled slightly, revealing himself as the chief architect of whatever scheme the Council had agreed upon before answering:

“The Imperium at large cannot know the Emperor is dead…”

Just brilliant! I'm amazed at how naturally you're handling some of the least known aspects of the setting.

 Medium of Death wrote:
Why would the Custodes kill themselves?

They'd know that the Golden Throne stops Daemons from pouring out onto the surface of Terra. They'd defend the breach with their lives.

Right! But it is fan lore so it is what it is.

Cool idea though!

 Dark Lord Seanron wrote:
Part Two (continued)
The High Lords
“The Imperium at large cannot know the Emperor is dead…”

CHILLS! EPIC!

this is great!
I need to hit myself in the head with a hammer to induce amnesia. that way I will forget about this until you are finished and return and read it completed

I mostly adore this, and I might go read the original, but you said that you weren't happy with it, so I have decided for now that I shouldn't read it. I love the whole high lords thing, and the Emprah obliterating part of the warp. What I don't love is the custodes all killing themselves, because they would have to protect the Emprah in his inevitable rebirth, since he is an immortal being. *pointed stare showing that this is what I think would happen* and also, after all the primarchs, spess marines and the custodes, there is no way there is anything femal that is biologically related to the Emprah. Sorry but there isn't, and I feel that she is only there for gender equality. If that is not the case, feel free to shoot me down.

 CREEEEEEEEED wrote:
I mostly adore this, and I might go read the original, but you said that you weren't happy with it, so I have decided for now that I shouldn't read it. I love the whole high lords thing, and the Emprah obliterating part of the warp. What I don't love is the custodes all killing themselves, because they would have to protect the Emprah in his inevitable rebirth, since he is an immortal being. *pointed stare showing that this is what I think would happen* and also, after all the primarchs, spess marines and the custodes, there is no way there is anything femal that is biologically related to the Emprah. Sorry but there isn't, and I feel that she is only there for gender equality. If that is not the case, feel free to shoot me down.

Remember that this is fan fiction so it is open to some fresh ideas and different interpretations, loving this series so far but I may join you in the 'holding off on reading the original' but given it was what I assume was the base for this series, it must have at the very least been pretty darn good.

So far the story seems great! Love the political/spiritual implications of the emperor dying, however the custodes killing themselves seems a bit of a stretch, since they, above all, are supposed to have the strongest of wills and most steadfast faiths. Also the eye of tranquility part really confused me, did not understand the wording very well.

I generally dislike having to respond to posts mid-story as I like to let the story do the talking, however I feel I should make a few points and responses to some folk as there seems to be small amounts of confusion. First off, the issue with the Custodes. Some of you seem to assume that it was all of the Custodes who slew themselves. The text says:

 Dark Lord Seanron wrote:
Seven upon seven: this was the number of deaths the Black Equation demanded, and this is what the Black Equation reaped.

Seven upon seven being seven squared, seven squared totals fourty nine (fifty, including the Custodian from the introduction) - There are generally considered to be 10,000 custodians at any one time so only a tiny fraction died. Also, I know Custodians are meant to be the most stoic and resolute of characters, however these are not normal deaths, something else is clearly going on. By the wording I've used it would suggest that such a thing is foretold: The chosen Custodians who died could not fight such a thing even if they wanted to.

Also, in regards to this:

 CREEEEEEEEED wrote:
and also, after all the primarchs, spess marines and the custodes, there is no way there is anything femal that is biologically related to the Emprah. Sorry but there isn't, and I feel that she is only there for gender equality.

If we assume that The Emperor did indeed have biological children (which is still very much hinted at in the existing lore). The Emperor was born some time in the 8th millenium BC, roughly between the years 8000 B.C and 7000 B.C. Even if the Emperor had been born just before the beginning of the year 7000 B.C that would give a time-frame of 47,000 years before his death on the throne.

In that time it is reasonable to assume that he had natural children. These children would have grown and they in turn would have had children. And these children would go on and have children, and so on and so forth. It is a complete statistical anomaly to expect that in 47,000 years of descendants, there wouldn't be at least one female born from the process.

Hope that clears a few things up.

Truly awesome stuff here, a fine candidate for 40k end-times if I do say so myself.

Everyone's a critic huh? Folks, if you don't agree with the story being told, go write your own one instead. Keep up the great work DLS.

 Eggs wrote:
Everyone's a critic huh? Folks, if you don't agree with the story being told, go write your own one instead. Keep up the great work DLS.

^This. Exalted.

Personally, I'm not a fan of fan fiction as people who can actually write (not tell or think up, but actually write), well written stories tend to become real writers rather than posters. I've been a DM in many epic story driven DnD campaigns where I've impressed myself with my well crafted story worthy of a book, I wouldn't have been able to commit it to paper and lend it the same gravitas as it played out in person. I'm not sure why I started reading this, but I have to say I'm very impressed. I really enjoy how things are jumping around in a not disjointed fashion and how, despite the nature of the setting, nothing is overly over the top. Reading what has transpired so far, I find I'm very interested to see how certain characters or factions that have'nt shown up yet will be portrayed. You're doing an excellent job so far, keep up the good work.

kungfujew wrote:
Personally, I'm not a fan of fan fiction as people who can actually write (not tell or think up, but actually write), well written stories tend to become real writers rather than posters. I've been a DM in many epic story driven DnD campaigns where I've impressed myself with my well crafted story worthy of a book, I wouldn't have been able to commit it to paper and lend it the same gravitas as it played out in person. I'm not sure why I started reading this, but I have to say I'm very impressed. I really enjoy how things are jumping around in a not disjointed fashion and how, despite the nature of the setting, nothing is overly over the top. Reading what has transpired so far, I find I'm very interested to see how certain characters or factions that have'nt shown up yet will be portrayed. You're doing an excellent job so far, keep up the good work.

Given that that is the case, I'm curious as to how you find yourself in the "Fan Fiction" section of a website, commenting on a piece of fan fiction

The stones struck the floor with a soft clatter, like rain upon masonry, and revealed the same fate they had spoken of since she had begun: War with the young species’ was coming, but with which the tokens would not say. Only that the Monkeigh hordes would be the instigators, but not the direct cause of the bloodshed.

Ju’daai closed her sunlight green eyes and breathed deeply, the faint scent of flowers and mourning on the air of the Wraithbone chamber. The young seer had been scrying for many moons now, and the repetition of the message and its ambiguity was starting to wear on her. Her betters in the Seer Council had received similar divinations, and had requested the aid of the Witchmind Covens to stare into the abyss and try untangle the webs of misinformation from the true fates. Her coven had made its home within one of the great dorsal wings of the Craftworld, with their seclusion chambers seated right at its pinnacle. The chambers were lined with Wraithbone trees like spun glass, each a work of art beyond any member of the lesser species. The ground was coated in a light dew, a reactive substance that the mighty World Ship produced like tears. The Craftworld had been weeping more these days, and Ju’daai was certain the message in the tokens was the cause.

She gathered the light stones in her nimble fingers, raised them in line with her forehead and cast her mind into the streams of fate surrounding them. Clearing her thoughts, she allowed the heat from the Wraithbone to radiate from her hand to her arm, her arm to her heart, and from her heart to her mind. She felt tension in the air as fate began to coil itself like a serpent around her mind, and when it was at its most suffocating, she cast the stones to the floor again, already knowing the pattern that would be revealed.

The silver stone of Vaul’s Contest lay next to the Khainestone, a blood red orb that beat with grim potential: War. The gentle orbs of Isha and Kurnous lay shaded, aligned directly with the projection of war: the Gods true children would be thrust into this coming conflict. The angular, brittle stone of She-Who-Thirsts lay within the orbiting signs, and would usually signal the return of the Great Annihilator, however it was shadowed by several blank and patterned blindstone’s of Cegorach, concealing its true meaning. Death on a monstrous scale was stalking the Children of Isha, but its source was hidden either by design or something darker. Finally, the smallest stones, representing the Children born of other Gods and the Monkeigh, lay farthest from the others, but their orbit would soon be directly in contact with the stones of Isha and Kurnous. War with the young races was inevitable, but with who was unknown.

Ju’daai sighed deeply and prepared to begin the process again, bringing her perception back from the streams of fate into herself once more.
But something stopped her.

A faint hum on the edge of perception, like a voice spoken through water began to draw her attention. It grew slowly in intensity and tone, and the stones before her began to gently vibrate. Ju’daai slowly rose from her cross-legged position, her gossamer robes tracing their way like droplets down her lithe form, and cocked her head as if listening. The hum was becoming more insistent with each passing moment, and she strained her perception to find its source.

Its source revealed itself suddenly and with harsh violence.

A brilliant detonation of sound and light brought Ju’daai to her knees, a vibrating waveform of mournful sensation buffeted the chamber. She covered her eyes, but the images of starfire and death could not be denied. She tried to scream for help but no sound escaped her throat, the noise in her mind drowning out everything else. And just as quickly as it had begun it ended with a rush of displaced air, and Ju’daai collapsed onto the floor and into blackness.

Strong hands awoke her with a gentle push, and when Ju’daai opened her eyes two warriors stood above her, concern etched in their noble faces. They spoke quickly and urgently, concerned for her condition and what had occurred. Ju’daai couldn’t speak, her mind too sore and still reeling from the shock. She raised her hand to wipe her eyes and was stopped as she realised she held something. Within her hand was a stone she had never seen before, and one she did not remember picking up. It was pale blue and gold, patterned with circle flanked by another and bisected down the middle. Although she had never seen this stone before, she knew what the stone meant.

Their death would come at the hand of the youngest of the Galaxies children.

 Dark Lord Seanron wrote:


Their death would come at the hand of the youngest of the Galaxies children.

Tau? That I would like to see.

 Dark Lord Seanron wrote:

 Eldarain wrote:
Isn't Black Library recruiting right now? Just saying...

Thanks for the heads up man, I'll be entering this asap. The Deathwatch is a bit outside my usual area of interest, but I'm looking forward to making something hopefully worth reading

No worries. Best of luck with your submission. You'll have to send me some first editions when you're the new rising star there though

 Archmagos_Amadeus wrote:


Given that that is the case, I'm curious as to how you find yourself in the "Fan Fiction" section of a website, commenting on a piece of fan fiction

I was actually on the main page and saw this in the popular threads at the top. I didn't realize it was a fan fiction until I saw the first part, decided to take a read since I was there already and now I'm hooked.

You never fail to impress, DLS. I knew I checked up on Dakka once in a while for a reason, turned out to be a damn good thing I do. Keep it up!

 King Pariah wrote:

 Dark Lord Seanron wrote:


Their death would come at the hand of the youngest of the Galaxies children.

Tau? That I would like to see.

Seconded.

So pleased to have found this thread! Excellent stuff, loved it all so far, great ideas. If you stop writing abruptly we will know BL have scooped you up!

Pssst, in the old thread, where is it by now?

lliu wrote:
Pssst, in the old thread, where is it by now?

We're still super early, literally the first few days.

Good stuff. I like it.