Mini-Movie Reviews- What You Are Watching.... in Miniature

Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you:

No adverts like this in the forums anymore.
Times and dates in your local timezone.
Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance.
Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely.
Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net.

If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

**cuda1179**

Hell Comes to Frogtown.

For those that like Rowdy Roddy Piper in a scifi movie, this is the OTHER Scifi movie he was in.

Post-apocalyptic earth, where fertility is rare. Also, for some reason, amphibians have gotten intelligent, large, and anthropomorphic. Piper is a prisoner used as breeding stock, but must bust a bunch of fertile women out of the Amphibian City, all while winning the heart of the woman keeping him captive, who is still more than willing to let him sire children with the captive women.

If you're going to watch it, being sober does not help.

**Geifer**

cuda1179 wrote:
If you're going to watch it, being sober does not help.

Can confirm.

I mostly blame the lead actor.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

The Boogey Man

A supernatural slasher, no 10 in the collection.

This is really rather good. Premise is that a mother’s abusive boyfriend is murdered by her children, as he made a habit of tying the kids to their bed.

Years later, the son is mute, and it seems the boyfriend’s spirit, trapped in a mirror, is causing killings.

Released in 1980, this could almost be an early prototype for modern supernatural tales of possession.

Now, some of the effects are cheap, but the plot and suspense are genuinely pretty good. Overall, there’s comfortably more good than bad here, and I’m thoroughly enjoying it, particularly given its vintage, it’s not relied on outright gore for the thrills.

Automatically Appended Next Post:
Bloodsucking Pharoahs In Pittsburgh

1991 horror comedy, with a strong hint of Airplane! Effects by Tom Savini.

The opening scenes are good fun, including the Police Dectective having the background music, broadcast from a police car, turned off. And a ransom/police taunting note in hieroglyphics - but with them cut from a magazine like the old school ransom note.

It kind of feels like a sillier, slicker Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers. Also, an amazing side story of anti-smoking aversion therapy. Including gorillas and a high pressure hose, because why the hell not.

**aku-chan**

From Beyond

Scientist invents a machine that allows people to see into a dimension that is usually out of sync with our own. Said dimension is full of monsters though, so it ends badly for him.
And what do people do? They keep turning the machine back on!

A so-so gory body horror film with some good effects, let down by people acting dumb even by horror movie standards.

**Ghaz**

aku-chan wrote:
From Beyond

Scientist invents a machine that allows people to see into a dimension that is usually out of sync with our own. Said dimension is full of monsters though, so it ends badly for him.
And what do people do? They keep turning the machine back on!

A so-so gory body horror film with some good effects, let down by people acting dumb even by horror movie standards.

It stars Jeffrey Combs, so that's a plus straight away.

**Easy E**

They keep turning it back on because they are addicted to the sensations from that other realm. The movie is pretty explicit about this. It is an allegory for addiction and particularly sexual addiction.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

Nightmares in a Damaged Brain

Not to be confused with Cat In The Brain which is a genuinely real and completely separate movie, and yes I’ve seen it.

Opening scene is proper gnarly. But overall the sound mix is a big poor. Until it’s not.

Also? Bizarrely visually explicit.

Whilst not entirely without merit (it’s a difficult watch for, I guess, the right reasons?), like The Night Train Murders, I’m not going to recommend this to any but the most seasoned, desensitised and mentally balance gore hound.

I mean, this is about as explicit as a 1981 slasher could get without everyone ending up in jail. And it’s absolutely a challenging watch. Probably because none of it’s played for laughs.

It’d definitely challenging slice of nasty. But I’m absolutely not gonna recommend it for that reason and that reason alone.

**aku-chan**

The House On Haunted Hill

The 90's remake version.
An eccentric couple holds a party in an abandoned, supposedly haunted, asylum, will anyone survive the night?

An entertaining, but flawed, horror movie. It wants to do the whole "Is the place really haunted or is it all a scam?" thing the original had, but it also wants to jump straight to showing off the ghosties, so the whole scheme and counter-scheme plot between the Prices is pretty much totally pointless.
Also with all the bizarre and creepy imagery the rest of the film had, you would've thought they could've come up with a better climax than

Spoiler:

Still, not a bad film altogether though.

**Sigur**

I watched it a bunch of years ago, and these are my findings:

.) That Catherine Zeta-Jones.
.) Not a bad cast really. The main lady, who I think also played the very tortured lady in a few episodes of the x-files, is good.
.) There was some somewhat creepy stuff, despite the CGI.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

Sigur wrote:
I watched it a bunch of years ago, and these are my findings:

.) That Catherine Zeta-Jones.
.) Not a bad cast really. The main lady, who I think also played the very tortured lady in a few episodes of the x-files, is good.
.) There was some somewhat creepy stuff, despite the CGI.

That’s The Haunting

**Lathe Biosas**

I just watched the most horrific film ever to be deployed into theaters.

From the directors of the Matrix comes: Jupiter Ascending!

~~Even I am not so cruel to bring back the painful memories, the auditory and visual crime against humanity, that~~

Here's my review!

Spoiler:

In the vast cosmos of cinematic storytelling, few films have dared to reach the ambitious heights of Jupiter Ascending. Directed by the visionary Wachowski siblings, known for their groundbreaking work on The Matrix, this film is a dazzling spectacle that transcends the boundaries of traditional science fiction. With a star-studded cast featuring the incomparable Mila Kunis, the ever-charismatic Channing Tatum, the legendary Sean Bean, and the mesmerizing Eddie Redmayne, Jupiter Ascending is a masterclass in ensemble performance.

From the very first frame, the audience is thrust into a meticulously crafted universe that is as rich as it is expansive. The world-building is nothing short of extraordinary, with each planet and species intricately designed to evoke a sense of wonder and awe. The cinematography, helmed by the talented John Toll, captures the breathtaking beauty of this universe, with sweeping vistas and stunning visual effects that leave viewers spellbound. Every scene is a feast for the eyes, showcasing the Wachowskis' unparalleled ability to blend practical effects with cutting-edge CGI.

The score, composed by the brilliant Michael Giacchino, elevates the film to new emotional heights. Each note resonates with the audience, perfectly complementing the film's themes of love, destiny, and the struggle for identity. The music swells during pivotal moments, drawing viewers into the emotional core of the story and leaving them breathless. It is a score that lingers long after the credits roll, a testament to its power and beauty.

Character development in Jupiter Ascending is profound and nuanced. Mila Kunis delivers a stunning performance as Jupiter Jones, a young woman destined for greatness. Her journey from a humble life on Earth to becoming a key player in an intergalactic power struggle is both inspiring and relatable. Channing Tatum's portrayal of Caine Wise, a genetically engineered warrior, adds layers of complexity to the narrative. Their chemistry is palpable, creating moments that resonate deeply with audiences, often bringing them to tears.

Eddie Redmayne's performance as the villainous Balem Abrasax is nothing short of iconic. His portrayal is chilling and captivating, embodying the essence of a power-hungry monarch with a chillingly calm demeanor. The depth of his character adds a rich layer to the film, making the stakes feel incredibly high and the conflict all the more engaging.

The screenplay, a tapestry of intricate plotlines and emotional arcs, weaves together themes of love, sacrifice, and the quest for belonging. The dialogue sparkles with wit and poignancy, ensuring that every character feels fully realized and relatable. The Wachowskis have crafted a narrative that is both epic in scope and intimate in its exploration of the human experience.

In conclusion, Jupiter Ascending is a triumph of modern cinema, a film that dares to dream big and delivers on every front. It is a visual and auditory feast that will leave audiences breathless, with moments that will linger in their hearts long after the final credits. The performances, the score, the world-building, and the emotional depth all come together to create a cinematic experience that is nothing short of extraordinary.

But, I’m sorry, I can’t keep writing this. I don’t believe a word I’m saying.

**BobtheInquisitor**

Star Trek: First Contact

“So, you’re all astronauts on some kind of star trek?”

First Contact is both the best TNG movie, and a movie I enjoy a little less every time I see it. It introduced to the franchise the dumb zombie Borg and their dumb embarrassing queen, as well unserious Action Picard. It would be a Voyager episode if the rest of it wasn’t so fun.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

I particularly enjoy Picard demonstrating his PTSD. It was something we saw in the show, but here they could take it a little further.

**Sigur**

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Sigur wrote:
I watched it a bunch of years ago, and these are my findings:

.) That Catherine Zeta-Jones.
.) Not a bad cast really. The main lady, who I think also played the very tortured lady in a few episodes of the x-files, is good.
.) There was some somewhat creepy stuff, despite the CGI.

That’s The Haunting

So sorry, my bad. But that Catherine Zeta-Jones, eh?

Generations and First Contact were the only Star Trek films I watched at the cinema. The latter seemed better. I didn't quite like the edgier Picard then, but on later viewings it made more sense.

**Lathe Biosas**

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
I particularly enjoy Picard demonstrating his PTSD. It was something we saw in the show, but here they could take it a little further.

And it's the first movie in the First Contact alternate Universe, which gave us Enterprise.

**ZergSmasher**

First Contact is easily the best TNG movie; the others don't really even come close.

**Overread**

ZergSmasher wrote:
First Contact is easily the best TNG movie; the others don't really even come close.

The problem as I see it is they never really seem to know what to DO with a TNG film after First Contact. The one that follows just feels like an over-long episode and honestly I never quite liked how the films started to really push Picard and Data as the core relationship focus of them. Esp since fans of the series had basically seen DATA do a lot of the character growth in the seasons already.

They were good films, but not outstanding and they didn't feel like they really pushed at the envelope of being a film. Nemesis tried but was very combat heavy. It setup a great stage though and its a shame that we never really saw it go further after in Startrek. Even when we revisit that timeline properly in Picard, we get a huge time-jump of decades which kind of means that we miss out on a huge chunk of development and change in things.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

And back on the Slashers with…..

Children of the Corn

A Stephen King classic, and pretty creepy. Basically kids, at the behest of some ancient god that lives amongst the cornfields take over their town. And we get a lovely slice of Americana Horror.

And to follow, at some point, are two of its sequels.

**Easy E**

Godzilla

This is the first Legendary film and.... it is really solid. I think some people bash it because of how Godzilla is basically a natural disaster going on in the background.... but it works really well. Plus, there are some amazing shots in this film, I mean really, really good looking and effective images. Plus, the "human" story is way more dramatic than I think people give it credit for.

**LunarSol**

Easy E wrote:
Godzilla

This is the first Legendary film and.... it is really solid. I think some people bash it because of how Godzilla is basically a natural disaster going on in the background.... but it works really well. Plus, there are some amazing shots in this film, I mean really, really good looking and effective images. Plus, the "human" story is way more dramatic than I think people give it credit for.

Still has one of if not the greatest killing blow in the whole Godzilla franchise.

The main issue with it is just that Adrian Brody struggles to carry the film through the middle and his final power pill delivery feels cheesier than where they were going up to that point. The MUTOS also just don't have one of the stronger monster designs out there, lacking the kind of personality of the best films out there. The last fight suffers a bit from being too dark and up close to follow clearly.

This is absolutely one of those films where I can picture it being the best Godzilla film ever, but I'm overly critical where it falls short of that. They definitely build on what works from this film, though they also lose some of its best elements. Really enjoy the first three films out of the 4, though each of them feel just shy of knocking it out of the park for me in one aspect or another.

That kiss in this one though, is absolutely perfect.

**A Town Called Malus**

They made a mistake in killing off Bryan Cranston. He should have been the main character and they could kill off boring generic soldier son instead.

**ZergSmasher**

Overread wrote:
ZergSmasher wrote:
First Contact is easily the best TNG movie; the others don't really even come close.

The problem as I see it is they never really seem to know what to DO with a TNG film after First Contact. The one that follows just feels like an over-long episode and honestly I never quite liked how the films started to really push Picard and Data as the core relationship focus of them. Esp since fans of the series had basically seen DATA do a lot of the character growth in the seasons already.

They were good films, but not outstanding and they didn't feel like they really pushed at the envelope of being a film. Nemesis tried but was very combat heavy. It setup a great stage though and its a shame that we never really saw it go further after in Startrek. Even when we revisit that timeline properly in Picard, we get a huge time-jump of decades which kind of means that we miss out on a huge chunk of development and change in things.

The books gave a very nice continuation of the story after Nemesis. It's a pity they killed off that branch of Trek in favor of the Picard show. But I don't want to beat that dead horse any more.

**BobtheInquisitor**

I loved the post-Nemesis book continuity. I miss Star Trek that felt like Star Trek.

**Ahtman**

LunarSol wrote:
The main issue with it is just that Adrian Brody struggles to carry the film

But he just won an Academy Award!

**Lathe Biosas**

Ahtman wrote:
LunarSol wrote:
The main issue with it is just that Adrian Brody struggles to carry the film

But he just won an Academy Award!

He was a great lead in Predators!

**LunarSol**

Lathe Biosas wrote:
Ahtman wrote:
LunarSol wrote:
The main issue with it is just that Adrian Brody struggles to carry the film

But he just won an Academy Award!

He was a great lead in Predators!

Doh

Mashed up the actor with the character name and latched it on a real person.

**cuda1179**

Godzilla: while I did somewhat like the "not showing" the monsters early on in the movie in a very Jaws way, I would have preferred just a bit more illumination for the fight scenes. Just a tiny bit more fire/starlight/moon/ or something would have made things much better to watch, even if if was unrealistically bright for night time. Other than that the visuals were dang impressive.

I felt the human story needed a bit of work though. It suffered from how many times they changed the plan of attack mid-stream. One too many "Let's do this, no that".

**Necroagogo**

Just got back from seeing Mickey 17. Best film I've seen in quite a while. Story was great, it looked fantastic and if Pattinson doesn't get a Best Actor nom next Oscars around, we have a hell of a year of acting performances ahead of us.

Highly recommended.

**Lathe Biosas**

Wait, we're allowed to watch good movies?

**Necroagogo**

I grant you dispensation.

Just this once.