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Lord Castellan wrote:265: Make a pre-game speech to your miniatures.

Sad part is i do this sometimes

# I don't have any idea at this point but im fairly sure we are in the upper 200's and may have gone into 300's(<--- Really cool number ) : Crouch down onto your knees and look at the models, and then, preferebly with your opponents models, say in a very creepy and demented voice "OH YES MAI PRETTIES! YES" then que creepy laugh and have everyone forever know you as "Conner The Whiny Little Turkey"....Yes...i know this kid...very annoying.

Saintspirit wrote:
#258 - Mourn over every model who dies.

Play Orks/ Nids and mourn over every model that dies!
Note: This doesn't count towards the number of ways to annoy your enemy

285 - Giggle whenever your opponent does something. If they ask why, just shrug, grin, and insist that he keep doing what he's doing if he really wants to.

286- When playing 'Nids, every time you go into assault or kill an opponent's model go "Nom nom nom".

287- Do a cartoonish voice and speak in third person everytime you do something with your orks...especially Ghazghkull.

288-Consistantly teabag your opponent's deployment zone and any unit of theirs near a table edge.

289-Hit the table, knocking models over. When your opponents asks why you did it, shout "I'm Old Gregg!!"

in the midle of a 1 on 1 match defect to the opponents side

291. Point at your artillery and tell you're opponent you are going to start trowing pie plates all over his army on your shooting phase.
292. If he doesn't object, literary throw pie plates at your opponents army, bonus points if there actually is pie on them.

Just though I'd tell you; What Jidmah just wrote was in fact nr 295.

296: Start crying when your opponent places his models on the table. Should he ask why, tell him that one of them (preferably a pretty special model) reminds you of your dead relative. Ask if you can have it.

The_Solitaire wrote:do ALL your measuring with the whipping stick (works great in apoc!)

I agree whole heartedly.

298- do all your measuring with a 3 inch ruler/small blast template.

299- when a commander dies, make yourself cry, scream "WHY, *leader/god of race* ?! WHY?!" at the cieling, point at opponent, scream that he's a murderer and storm out clutching your model.
return a few seconds later, knock over his commander, storm out again.
return again, pick up your stuff, storm out.

300 (for the number)- make an edited 300 speech to suit your army, marching the commander along the line of troops.
make edited 300 references throughout.

threadomancy?
oops.

shrike wrote:

The_Solitaire wrote:do ALL your measuring with the whipping stick (works great in apoc!)

I agree whole heartedly.

298- do all your measuring with a 3 inch ruler/small blast template.

299- when a commander dies, make yourself cry, scream "WHY, *leader/god of race* ?! WHY?!" at the cieling, point at opponent, scream that he's a murderer and storm out clutching your model.
return a few seconds later, knock over his commander, storm out again.
return again, pick up your stuff, storm out.

300 (for the number)- make an edited 300 speech to suit your army, marching the commander along the line of troops.
make edited 300 references throughout.

threadomancy?
oops.

Except you're in fact only at nr 299 (check the post above yours) so the 300d goes to me:
Nr 300: Try to hypnotize your enemy. Have your eyes look like an owls and whisper commands slowly.

Nr 301: When your opponent says he's going to do something particularly important, quote Graham Chapman and say this (or similar) in a posh accent:
'Oh, oh, no more buttered scones for me, mater. I'm off to play the grand piano'. 'Pardon me while I assault with my terminators.'

Also,

Pour cheese sauce all over your opponent's army. Complain that it is cheesy.

I laughed so, so much to this!

302: Insist that you will only play if your opponent allows you to blast Nyan Cat from the nearest music player the entire game. Over and Over and Over again.

Go to Build a Bear....buy the lil voice usb recorder/player...load it with about 5-10 seconds of the imperial march song onto it...every time you move, shoot, or assault with a unit...every unit...push the button to play the song. I did it with my old Tau.

I still get patted down to check for it every time I walk into the store....

and

Whenever your opponent goes to roll to hit/wound you...make sure you tell him "Okay...you need anything but a 1!"

304: if you play Aircav guard, build all your Valks with a small tape player and speakers in them.

put "Ride of the Valkieries" on said tape players.

play on a loop during the entire game.


you can get pretty good surround sound with outflanking Valks

305: Arrange a friendly game at your FLGS then don't turn up, and spend the entire time in bed with your opponents girlfriend instead. Text him pictures with captions 'Turn 1, Turn 2' etc

Daedricbob wrote:305: Arrange a friendly game at your FLGS then don't turn up, and spend the entire time in bed with your opponents girlfriend instead. Text him pictures with captions 'Turn 1, Turn 2' etc

Better if it's your opponent's girlfriend AND mother at the same time

When rolling for any combat action whatsoever, recite whatever litany or prayer is appropriate for the situation as dictated by "The Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer". Considering how many there are for given situations, this can easily add several long irritating minutes to make your opponent rage.

Boba Fex wrote:Teammates? What are those?
Kidding. Umm...

#whatever - In the middle of a 2-on-2 match, "defect" to your opponent's side. Bonus points if you held your army back and let your teammate advance, thus putting your troops at his back.

I agree, what's a teammate. Is that like someone/thing that you're supposed to work with(except not in cubicles)? I don't have to give them encouraging remarks, do I?

I still think that the best thing to do is bring a hammer as your "plan B".

What about dressing like a commisar and disciplining the troops when they fail you (such as failing morale/not following orders)?

306. Tell them you're gonna convert marneus calgard

### spill blood for Khorne before the game starts
### break an empty vial on the board, claim it was a deadly disease you released for Nurgle
### drink (alot) while playing Space Wolves and act(until you are) like a crazy drunk

307- Every time you loose a model, yell "doodie head" at your opponent.
If you need an example:

Win.

Another good one...bring a ton of dice....as many as you can...like a crown royal bag full of small chessex dice...when rolling off to go first, dump the entire bag on the table and begin looking at each one carefully. When asked what your doing, reply "looking for my lucky roll off dice"....if your opponent allows you to continue til the end....start looking thru your bag, go back out to your car...take as much time as possible...then was an hour or so has gone by...simply say that you must have left it at home...then start the process again and make you say that you are now looking for your "backup" lucky roll off dice....

# When your opponet shoots at your vehicle behind cover let him shoot and roll for penetration and damage. When he rolls his last dice roll your cover save,. When you save it yell in his face "Can't see me!'

308. Dress up as a comissar, take a BB-gun (if not a real gun) and shoot at the comanders of all freeding units (yours and your allies').

309. Go to the game with a puppet and have HIM play the game

310. Use rocks are proys. Identically-looking rocks. With paper eyes.

Print out this thread. Read it in its entirety to your opponent after deployment. Do not stop no matter what. Make sure you say the author and time and date of submission before reading each post.

add in each user's signiture as well for added fun

Commisar Wolfie wrote:add in each user's signiture as well for added fun

And feel free to act out emoticons, in addition to reading them, of course.

Take two master of ordinances (s9 ap3) in a 3 person free for all.. shout out Danger Close! As both your opponents hq approach your lines (chaos terminator lord/space marine hero in termi armor) drop the blasts on their heads and shout out boomshakalaka! For each one after they failed their 2+ save then shout out vaporised For the Emperor!!! Looks like the hammer is mightier then the sword!! Followed by an evil muahah laugh and go on to win the game .

True story lol

Swiftblade wrote:302: Insist that you will only play if your opponent allows you to blast Nyan Cat from the nearest music player the entire game. Over and Over and Over again.

Or the super-omega extended edition...Which I listened to for 28 min....a month ago...IT WAS HORRIBLE


335? Play guardsmen in apoc. Take as many flashlights as is legally possible. For each time you shoot, yell, "IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZAR!!!!" at the top of your lungs. If you somehow manage to kill a model, shout,"BLARG!"

Bring a tape of 'Sirius' by the Allen Parsons Project, play over and over again while deploying.

So, so many of these things have happened at my local store over the years and are the very reasons I avoid it.