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play nidzilla, and while your opponent is doing his things, moving miniatures, rolling die etc. throw gaunts at him. when he starts keeping the models thinking he is making an impact on your army, laugh.

Eftz3 wrote:Sorry I haven't counted for you guys. I have been busy these last few days. I'll try to get to it tomorrow.

Lets see if we can go to 500! and also lets try to find some ways to annoy your teamates!

#?.... Play tau, leave most of your army in reserve. Then attempt to bring your army in on turn 3. If it sucessfully gets in, don't move your models. Watch as your teammate looses

That was nr 256, and what bok_choy17 wrote was nr 257. It would become easier if everyone wrote what number their way is.

#258 - Mourn over every model who dies.

Ways to annoy team mates?
?.Take as many imperial guard platoons armed with mortars and grenade launchers as possible. Only use the small blast template for the launchers. When the enemy get really close to his lines fire at them even though you might hit your ally.

Insist frag and krak grenades are weapons and try to use them.

Teammates? What are those?
Kidding. Umm...

#whatever - In the middle of a 2-on-2 match, "defect" to your opponent's side. Bonus points if you held your army back and let your teammate advance, thus putting your troops at his back.

#259 - Take as many imperial guard platoons armed with mortars and grenade launchers as possible. Only use the small blast template for the launchers. When the enemy get really close to his lines fire at them even though you might hit your ally.

#260 - Insist frag and krak grenades are weapons and try to use them.

#261 - In the middle of a 2-on-2 match, "defect" to your opponent's side. Bonus points if you held your army back and let your teammate advance, thus putting your troops at his back.

Fixed those for you. IMO, you are quite lazy.

262. Insist on bringing staff officers (in the form of friends), write written orders, send them to a staff officer to be copied and send to the orderlies, who will then dilver them to the squad in question, he will then write a confirmation that the order has been carried out, which will then need to be signed by all the staff officers, before finally coming back to you. Repeat for every single squad. Insist on wearing a bicorne hat.

Saintspirit wrote:
Fixed those for you. IMO, you are quite lazy.

Good thing we have you to fix it for us!

Also, thank you.

winnertakesall wrote:262. Insist on bringing staff officers (in the form of friends), write written orders, send them to a staff officer to be copied and send to the orderlies, who will then dilver them to the squad in question, he will then write a confirmation that the order has been carried out, which will then need to be signed by all the staff officers, before finally coming back to you. Repeat for every single squad. Insist on wearing a bicorne hat.

Bonus point if the chain of command is disrupted by a toilet break and the entire turn grinds to a halt.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

Boba Fex wrote:Teammates? What are those?
Kidding. Umm...

#whatever - In the middle of a 2-on-2 match, "defect" to your opponent's side. Bonus points if you held your army back and let your teammate advance, thus putting your troops at his back.

I have actually done this before...
Admittedly my team mate was useless which is why i defected but still...

Me too! High-five!

263.Casually knock over your opponents miniatures when they aren't looking.

#264 - Yell "Yahtzee!" after every time you roll multiple dice.

265: Make a pre-game speech to your miniatures.

266: Play space marines.

266 Make them show you how they have WYSIWYG a psychic power and when they don't have it that way, tell them they can't use it!

267. Read out this entire list before you start play

Offer to shake is hand before and after the game, as well as handle his models. Make frequent trips to the bathroom. At the end of the game, mention you forgot to wash your hands.

Alastergrimm wrote:266 Make them show you how they have WYSIWYG a psychic power and when they don't have it that way, tell them they can't use it!

Firstly I knew a guy who had this happen to him, so the next time he played that guy he had glued little signs to 40k bases. Signs like from miniature cars and railroads or whatever, for Doom it was a blinking light that he put in front of the unit he doomed, and for Guide he used a arrow sign that he painted to say "Shoot those things".

269. Take one of those things from Halloween that goes inside the pumpkins, the ones that blow air and make tissue paper move around, and put it on all of the "wrecked" vehicles. BONUS: Make it a particularly loud one.

Show up to the game, take out a boom box, play Never Gonna Give You Up, then promptly leave. Return in an hour to collect the boombox.

Whenever you kill an important close combat unit with shooting, in even better cases IC's through wound allocation, claim that is what they get for bringing knives to a gun fight. Happened to vulkan the other day at a tournament when he was in a pack of terminators and he dropped first. I wouldn't let the poor guy live it down the rest of the round.

Play IG. If an ally's squad fails a morale check, have the nearest squad with a commissar in it open fire on/assault the fleeing unit, while growling about cowards and defeatists.

273, Bring a Sledgehammer to the game, every time a unit fails morale, regardless of the team, claim that Khorne is displeased with their cowardice, and smash the squad to oblivion.

P.S. MULTILAZORS and Land Razors.

274. Every time someone makes a move (in your battle or someone elses) sign and shake your head, sometimes grumbling 'why would you do that?'

275. As an Eldar player, kindly remind your opponent every time they try to shoot you, assault you, or take a psychic test all of the special Eldar rules that are going to effect the situation.

276. Bladestorm with Doom and Guide with a full unit of Dire Avengers and proceed roll each shot one by one, then reroll fails one by one... then wound one by one, and reroll failed wounds one by one...

277. Hit 3 packs of 30 man orks with a single night spinner shot. Next round when they go to move, remind your opponent that dangerous terrain tests are per model.

278. Eat cheetos, cast lash of submission on opponent's favorite unit...

Saintspirit wrote:

#259 - Take as many imperial guard platoons armed with mortars and grenade launchers as possible. Only use the small blast template for the launchers. When the enemy get really close to his lines fire at them even though you might hit your ally.

#260 - Insist frag and krak grenades are weapons and try to use them.

#261 - In the middle of a 2-on-2 match, "defect" to your opponent's side. Bonus points if you held your army back and let your teammate advance, thus putting your troops at his back.

Fixed those for you. IMO, you are quite lazy.

I'm not lazy just not home, or have access to a computer. I will get to it however, by Thursday... hopefully

play necrons; if you need to phase out turn off the light and run away return in an hour to collect your stuff

The_Solitaire wrote:do ALL your measuring with the whipping stick (works great in apoc!)

Use the whipping sticks to flay your opponent every time he speaks!

purplefood wrote:88. USe your shoes as tanks
89.Use a Welsh rulebook and codex
90.Speak only in Welsh

THIS!

snake wrote:Narrate the obvious. Most preferably repeat things s/he tells you as if you need to inform him/her.

Narrate every action your opponent does, and everything he says, example:
Leigen_Zero: 'snake rolled the dice, he needed to make 3 armour saves or his marines would flee'
snake: 'shut up!'
Leigen_Zero: 'he snapped, annoyed by leigen's incessant narrating'

Not wargaming related, but did this to a friend of mine for nearly a week, had to stop when she threatened to kill us all in our sleep

(forgot which number we were on)
###: Forget your own dice, ask opponent if you can use theirs, throughout the game, scratch your crotch repeatedly...
###: Play a lash list, insist on you moving your opponents models, while eating nachos, with cheese dip...
###: During the game, preferably in the middle of your turn, take a phonecall and start shouting in a foreign language down the phone...
###: Poop in the dice box...

Use the movie marine rules for your all SMs and don't tell him. Watch him cry when 10 SMs kill his entire hivefleet.

Boba Fex wrote:
#whatever - In the middle of a 2-on-2 match, "defect" to your opponent's side. Bonus points if you held your army back and let your teammate advance, thus putting your troops at his back.

I have actually have done this before.

# lost count. In the middle of a game randomly start laughing like a maniac.