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Which Primarch Would Have Been Popular With The Ladies?
The Lion
Sanguinius
Leman Russ
Roboute Gulliman
Magnus
Lorgar
Horus
Fulgrim
Vulkan
Konrad Curze
Rogal Dorn
Mortarion
Perturabo
Alpharius
Jaghatai Khan
Ferrus Manus
Angron
Corax

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Made in de
Wrathful Warlord Titan Commander






germany,bavaria

Delephont wrote:
Its kind of like that guy "you" used to know, he liked The Sound of Music, used to dance around in his mums high heels, had a high pitched voice at 25, and for some reason, you used to get goose bumps if ever you had to bend over in front of him....well, he didn't wear a badge that said GAY, but sure as hell all the evidence pointed that way!

Theres a huge amount of GAY running through GW's product structure....they hate sculpting women, but will sculpt screaming men till the cows come home, the fact that Space Marines can't have sex and reproduce....no, the Emp' thought it would be a great idea to bypass nature as it were, and hold Progenoid Glands instead....hmmm......BIG GAY SPACE MARINES.....all the evidence points to the same conclusion.

Evidence?

or Delephont's imagination...

Some of the 40k races doesn't have 2 genders in minis, would this make them gay too?

Target locked,ready to fire



In dedicatio imperatum ultra articulo mortis.

H.B.M.C :
We were wrong. It's not the 40k End Times. It's the Trademarkening.
 
   
Made in ca
Calculating Commissar






Kamloops, B.C.

Delephont wrote:
BeRzErKeR wrote:
Delephont wrote:Errrmmm....you do realise that all the Primarchs, and every Space Marine since, is in fact, homosexual.

The Primarchs would have been interested in naked boys then women.....you guys really need to read your fluff!


Actually, Space Marines are eunuchs. Genetic modification does terrible things to the equipment, as it were.

The Primarchs? No idea. But I really don't know where the "homosexual" thing is coming from, care to explain?


Its kind of like that guy "you" used to know, he liked The Sound of Music, used to dance around in his mums high heels, had a high pitched voice at 25, and for some reason, you used to get goose bumps if ever you had to bend over in front of him....well, he didn't wear a badge that said GAY, but sure as hell all the evidence pointed that way!

Theres a huge amount of GAY running through GW's product structure....they hate sculpting women, but will sculpt screaming men till the cows come home, the fact that Space Marines can't have sex and reproduce....no, the Emp' thought it would be a great idea to bypass nature as it were, and hold Progenoid Glands instead....hmmm......BIG GAY SPACE MARINES.....all the evidence points to the same conclusion.



Or this is just homophobia.

And you know what they say about homophobes...


As for which Primarch, well, I voted Sangiunius. He's a pretty-boy with wings. Japanese girls and Wannabe Anime fans would probably be right giddy in the pants for him.

But the truth is, Rowboat Girlyman. Because, let's face it, according to GW: "THE ULTRAMEREENS R THE LEET BESTEST SPAYSEMEREENSLAWL" and they always win the day

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/01/30 18:08:13


Dakka Code:
DR:80+S++G++M++B++I+Pw40k00+D+++A++/areWD-R++T(M)DM+

U WAN SUM P&M BLOG? MARINES, GUARD, DE, NIDS AND ORKS, OH MY! IT'S GR8 M8, I R8 8/8 
   
Made in us
Fireknife Shas'el






Richmond, VA

*NOTE: THE FOLLOWING IS A JOKE AND NOT WHAT I BELIEVE*

Vulkan, because once you've had black, you never go back

 
   
Made in us
Unhealthy Competition With Other Legions





And that is EXACTLY why I stay away from coffee.

6000 points IG, Leviathins 8th company, (store regiment) 60% painted
4500 points Empire 80-90% painted!
2500 Ogres 2% painted
WIP Biker Battle Company 95% painted
2500 Points Isstavan Drop site massacre Iron Hands (still waiting for dat codex)
I managed to play a 1750 point game with minimal proxieing on the first day DE came out. go me!
The Gutterballers, a relatively successfull BloodBowl team
Oh, and Howard's Faildar

4000 points Adeptus Titanicus  
   
Made in in
[MOD]
Otiose in a Niche






Hyderabad, India

Space Marine Chaplains are on record as opposing Heterosexual Marriage.

 
   
Made in ro
Focused Dark Angels Land Raider Pilot




Eeeveryvehr

How about incest? I mean, after all, they're Battle Brothers.

Could you be there

'cause I'm the one who waits for you

Or are you unforgiven too?  
   
Made in in
[MOD]
Otiose in a Niche






Hyderabad, India

The Space Emperor intended for marriage to be the sacred union between two Battle Brothers. Or possibly between one Battle Brother and one Thunder Wolf.

Women are evil succubi who want to drain their precious warrior fluids to fill their hollow voids.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/01/30 22:16:51


 
   
Made in us
Sneaky Kommando




SD

At the people crying homosexuality, I'd like to put in my two cents. I am more inclined to believe it is related to what the Greeks did, which was promote a man love amongst soldiers. That way, if you felt that strong of a connection for somebody, you'd fight that much harder to protect them. Get an entire army into that mindset, and you are gold.
Also, I'm sure the Emperor left out the want to reproduce to keep the Space Marines libido down. Hell, last thing you want is your Space Marine not fighting because he had a late night with the ladies.
   
Made in ro
Focused Dark Angels Land Raider Pilot




Eeeveryvehr

Well, taking into consideration the extended capacity to function without sleep, i fail to see the problem with that. Unless he's been banging for the last 10 days or so

Could you be there

'cause I'm the one who waits for you

Or are you unforgiven too?  
   
Made in us
Doc Brown






Wow, the people in this thread actually responding seriously to the trolling is making me lmao.

"From the fires of Betrayal unto the blood of revenge we bring the name of Lorgar, the Bearer of the Word, the favored Son of Chaos, all praise be given to him. From those that would not heed we offer praise to those who do, that they might turn their gaze our way and gift us with the Boon of Pain, to turn the Galaxy red with the blood, and feed the hunger of the Gods."

-Excerpt from the Three Hundred and Forty-First

Book of Epistles of Lorgar

Cheese Elemental wrote:That made me think... what's a good pick-up line in the Imperium?

"Hey baby, my plasma cannon's running hot and I need to purge you in the name of the Emperor tonight."
 
   
Made in au
Horrific Howling Banshee





Australia

Vulkan, he's hotter than lava

custom craftworld "Kuro-i" 1400pts
 
   
Made in gb
Krazy Grot Kutta Driva





England.

Dorn because only he can penetrate the women's 'fortress'
I love innuendo

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/01/31 00:56:40


 
   
Made in us
Decrepit Dakkanaut






Mesopotamia. The Kingdom Where we Secretly Reign.

It's gotta be Jagatai Khan.

"Hey baby, wanna go for a ride on my motorcycle?"

Drink deeply and lustily from the foamy draught of evil.
W: 1.756 Quadrillion L: 0 D: 2
Haters gon' hate. 
   
Made in us
RogueSangre






Chicks do like biker dudes...

   
Made in au
Gore-Soaked Lunatic Witchhunter






Australia (Recently ravaged by the Hive Fleet Ginger Overlord)

This...

Necroagogo wrote:Not sure who would be most popular, but I can't see Ferrus Mannus getting much action. Iron Hands and foreplay don't exactly go well together.


...and This.

chaplaingrabthar wrote:Vulkan, because once you've had black, you never go back


Well done.

Smacks wrote:
After the game, pack up all your miniatures, then slap the guy next to you on the ass and say.

"Good game guys, now lets hit the showers"
 
   
Made in nz
Bounding Dark Angels Assault Marine




Auckland, New Zealand

any girl with Konrad Cruze would be a screamer (seeing as I'd peg him as a rapist for the sake of sowing terror/warped justice)

I wish my lawn was emo...
Then it would cut itself.

In the end, SoB are uppity female canines who enjoy their faith in the emperor so much, I'd say they themselves are no longer truly human. They've given up normal life in exchange to become bolter-bitches.  
   
Made in gb
Potent Possessed Daemonvessel






Lorgar, because girls dig the fanatical type.

Plus, most enjoy being worshipped like gods.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/01/31 12:28:41


 
   
Made in gb
Sybarite Swinging an Agonizer




Where Eagles Dare.

Russ all the way. If one of his sons (Lukas) can be famous for sharing twenty beds in one night, how far do you think the big daddy would go?
Oh and the crack about the thunderwolf ... not cool dude. not COOl!

On The Darkest Nights They Rise, The Paragons Of Metal. Rock On My Brothers, Rock On.
'YOU FORGOT ABOUT THE CANDY!' Famous last words of an RP Demolitions Expert
I'm both chaotic and orderly. I value my own principles, and am willing to go to extreme lengths to enforce them, often trampling on the very same principles in the process. At best, I'm heroic and principled; at worst, I'm hypocritical and disorderly. I am Red And White.
"THOUGH I FACE THE SHADOWS OF THE WARP, I SHALL FEAR NO EVIL, I SHALL FEAR NO FOE!FOR I HAVE MOAR DAKKA THAN YOU, BITCHES!"
kronk wrote: Well, yeah. It's not Halloween, yet. I'd be scared of 4 jackasses in masks and trench coats riding around my neighborhood on horses.

 
   
Made in gb
Stern Iron Priest with Thrall Bodyguard




The drinking halls of Fenris or South London as its sometimes called

Russ without a doubt, If space marines still have sex only the SW seem to be getting any.

Its in their fluff.

R.I.P Amy Winehouse


 
   
Made in ba
Boom! Leman Russ Commander







Sanguinius maybe or Leman Russ.

Hail to the creeeeeeeeeeeeeeed!baby Ask not the moot a question,for he will give you three answers,all of which will result in a public humiliation.

My DIY chapter Fire Wraiths http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/264338.page
3 things that Ivan likes:
Food Sex Machines
Tactical Genius of DakkaDakka
Colonel Miles Quaritch is my hero
 
   
Made in gb
Hanging Out with Russ until Wolftime







Leman Russ to be sure!

Got 40k Rules Question? Send an e-mail to Gwar! for your Confidential Rules Queries.
Please do not PM me unless really necessary. I much prefer e-mail.
Need it Answered RIGHT NOW!? Ring me on Skype: "gwar.the.trolle"
Looking to play some Vassal? Ring me for a game!
Download The Unofficial FAQs by Gwar! here! (Dark Eldar Draft FAQ v1.0 released 04/Nov/2010! Download it before the Pandas eat it all!)
 
   
Made in us
Da Head Honcho Boss Grot





Minnesota

Kid_Kyoto wrote:
BeRzErKeR wrote:

Actually, Space Marines are eunuchs. Genetic modification does terrible things to the equipment, as it were.

The Primarchs? No idea. But I really don't know where the "homosexual" thing is coming from, care to explain?


Space Marines fear having their 'warrior fluids' sucked away by women and only share them with their battle brothers. It's a longstanding bit of fluff. Similar to how the Greek and the Romans felt about these things.
General Jack D. Ripper: Mandrake, do you realize that in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk... ice cream. Ice cream, Mandrake, children's ice cream.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Lord, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: You know when fluoridation first began?
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: I... no, no. I don't, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: Nineteen hundred and forty-six. Nineteen forty-six, Mandrake. How does that coincide with your post-war Commie conspiracy, huh? It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hard-core Commie works.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Uh, Jack, Jack, listen, tell me, tell me, Jack. When did you first... become... well, develop this theory?
General Jack D. Ripper: Well, I, uh... I... I... first became aware of it, Mandrake, during the physical act of love.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: Yes, a uh, a profound sense of fatigue... a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I... I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake. Women uh... women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I, uh... I do not avoid women, Mandrake.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: No.
General Jack D. Ripper: But I... I do deny them my essence.

Anuvver fing - when they do sumfing, they try to make it look like somfink else to confuse everybody. When one of them wants to lord it over the uvvers, 'e says "I'm very speshul so'z you gotta worship me", or "I know summink wot you lot don't know, so yer better lissen good". Da funny fing is, arf of 'em believe it and da over arf don't, so 'e 'as to hit 'em all anyway or run fer it.
 
   
Made in ba
Boom! Leman Russ Commander







Orkeosaurus wrote:
Kid_Kyoto wrote:
BeRzErKeR wrote:

Actually, Space Marines are eunuchs. Genetic modification does terrible things to the equipment, as it were.

The Primarchs? No idea. But I really don't know where the "homosexual" thing is coming from, care to explain?


Space Marines fear having their 'warrior fluids' sucked away by women and only share them with their battle brothers. It's a longstanding bit of fluff. Similar to how the Greek and the Romans felt about these things.
General Jack D. Ripper: Mandrake, do you realize that in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk... ice cream. Ice cream, Mandrake, children's ice cream.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Lord, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: You know when fluoridation first began?
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: I... no, no. I don't, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: Nineteen hundred and forty-six. Nineteen forty-six, Mandrake. How does that coincide with your post-war Commie conspiracy, huh? It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hard-core Commie works.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Uh, Jack, Jack, listen, tell me, tell me, Jack. When did you first... become... well, develop this theory?
General Jack D. Ripper: Well, I, uh... I... I... first became aware of it, Mandrake, during the physical act of love.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: Yes, a uh, a profound sense of fatigue... a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I... I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake. Women uh... women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I, uh... I do not avoid women, Mandrake.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: No.
General Jack D. Ripper: But I... I do deny them my essence.

I don't get it,my humor isn't highly advanced.

Hail to the creeeeeeeeeeeeeeed!baby Ask not the moot a question,for he will give you three answers,all of which will result in a public humiliation.

My DIY chapter Fire Wraiths http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/264338.page
3 things that Ivan likes:
Food Sex Machines
Tactical Genius of DakkaDakka
Colonel Miles Quaritch is my hero
 
   
Made in it
Bounding Assault Marine





Italy, Cremona

ok...

Rogal Dorn - you know, with the pain gloves perhaps there were strange ladies around... if you know what I mean.

Leman Russ - oh come on... he's a Viking, he's good for sure with the ladies (on a bed)

Magnus The Red - 'cause bigger is better sometimes

Jaghatai Khan - he could have interesting exotic ways that could interest some ladies.

And .... this topic is sure strange and weird!

Crimson Fists - 15.000 points Salamanders - under construction Imperial Fists - pondering, damn yellow
27th Virginian IG - 4.000 points
olympia wrote:
All so-called Finecast miniatures come with the Gets Hot! rule. Roll a "1" and your mini melts!

I've bought my last models from GW on October 10th, 2011. Since then I've bought none, I am against their price policy. Screw them.
 
   
Made in au
Gore-Soaked Lunatic Witchhunter






Australia (Recently ravaged by the Hive Fleet Ginger Overlord)

Orkeosaurus wrote:
Space Marines fear having their 'warrior fluids' sucked away by women and only share them with their battle brothers. It's a longstanding bit of fluff. Similar to how the Greek and the Romans felt about these things.
General Jack D. Ripper: Mandrake, do you realize that in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk... ice cream. Ice cream, Mandrake, children's ice cream.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Lord, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: You know when fluoridation first began?
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: I... no, no. I don't, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: Nineteen hundred and forty-six. Nineteen forty-six, Mandrake. How does that coincide with your post-war Commie conspiracy, huh? It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hard-core Commie works.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Uh, Jack, Jack, listen, tell me, tell me, Jack. When did you first... become... well, develop this theory?
General Jack D. Ripper: Well, I, uh... I... I... first became aware of it, Mandrake, during the physical act of love.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: Yes, a uh, a profound sense of fatigue... a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I... I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake. Women uh... women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I, uh... I do not avoid women, Mandrake.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: No.
General Jack D. Ripper: But I... I do deny them my essence.


... Where did you get this Orkeo?

Smacks wrote:
After the game, pack up all your miniatures, then slap the guy next to you on the ass and say.

"Good game guys, now lets hit the showers"
 
   
Made in gb
Fully-charged Electropriest





Glasgow

Emperors Faithful wrote:
Orkeosaurus wrote:
Space Marines fear having their 'warrior fluids' sucked away by women and only share them with their battle brothers. It's a longstanding bit of fluff. Similar to how the Greek and the Romans felt about these things.
General Jack D. Ripper: Mandrake, do you realize that in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk... ice cream. Ice cream, Mandrake, children's ice cream.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Lord, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: You know when fluoridation first began?
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: I... no, no. I don't, Jack.
General Jack D. Ripper: Nineteen hundred and forty-six. Nineteen forty-six, Mandrake. How does that coincide with your post-war Commie conspiracy, huh? It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hard-core Commie works.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Uh, Jack, Jack, listen, tell me, tell me, Jack. When did you first... become... well, develop this theory?
General Jack D. Ripper: Well, I, uh... I... I... first became aware of it, Mandrake, during the physical act of love.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: Yes, a uh, a profound sense of fatigue... a feeling of emptiness followed. Luckily I... I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. Loss of essence.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Hmm.
General Jack D. Ripper: I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake. Women uh... women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I, uh... I do not avoid women, Mandrake.
Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: No.
General Jack D. Ripper: But I... I do deny them my essence.


... Where did you get this Orkeo?


Dr Strangelove: Or how I stopped worrying and learned to love the bomb - such a wonderful movie

"Gentleman, you can't fight in here, this is a War Room!!!"

   
Made in ro
Regular Dakkanaut





1) Lorgar would be top spot in my opinion, because he's handsome enough and smooth talking enough to score a lot, and, unlike his prettier brothers (Lion, Fulgrim, Sanguinius) he might actually be straight.

2) Leman Russ likes the ladies, and he's like a dog in heat. He keeps trying and trying, but I think his persistence misfires more often than he'd like. He's still successful at it, but he's the one I would see getting slapped ever now and then.

3) Horus. I mean there's got to be some reason why people across the galaxy used to name their children after him, right?

4) Perturabo. Sure, he's a sour grape and all, but look at the symbolism. Iron within, iron without... Long gun barrels pointing skyward... He doesn't even need to bother with charms, his reputation does all the work for him.

5) Dorn. He's likeable even before he works his charms. Plus, he's stationed on Terra and spends very little time fighting. I'd say he's hitting the ballrooms, being a perfect gentleman, and it works for him.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2010/02/06 16:42:40


Q: How many Space Marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. The Emperor IS MY LIGHT!!!

Azezel wrote:I believe they've tried that. thirteen times in fact... Fourteen if you count that Horus thing.
 
   
Made in gb
Sybarite Swinging an Agonizer




Where Eagles Dare.

Lupe wrote:
3) Horus. I mean there's got to be some reason why people across the galaxy used to name their children after him, right?


GENIUS!

On The Darkest Nights They Rise, The Paragons Of Metal. Rock On My Brothers, Rock On.
'YOU FORGOT ABOUT THE CANDY!' Famous last words of an RP Demolitions Expert
I'm both chaotic and orderly. I value my own principles, and am willing to go to extreme lengths to enforce them, often trampling on the very same principles in the process. At best, I'm heroic and principled; at worst, I'm hypocritical and disorderly. I am Red And White.
"THOUGH I FACE THE SHADOWS OF THE WARP, I SHALL FEAR NO EVIL, I SHALL FEAR NO FOE!FOR I HAVE MOAR DAKKA THAN YOU, BITCHES!"
kronk wrote: Well, yeah. It's not Halloween, yet. I'd be scared of 4 jackasses in masks and trench coats riding around my neighborhood on horses.

 
   
Made in au
Sinewy Scourge






Western Australia

Lupe wrote:1) Lorgar would be top spot in my opinion, because he's handsome enough and smooth talking enough to score a lot, and, unlike his prettier brothers (Lion, Fulgrim, Sanguinius) he might actually be straight.


Someone's actually come up with a good Lorgar argument! Especially the last bit...

Kabal of Venomed Dreams
Mourning Angel
UsdiThunder wrote:This is why I am a devout Xenos Scum. We at least do not worship Toasters.

 
   
Made in ro
Regular Dakkanaut





Morgrim wrote:Someone's actually come up with a good Lorgar argument! Especially the last bit...


Well, I wouldn't go that far. I made that statement assuming Word Bearers aren't into altar boys. Still waiting for Dark Creed for confirmation

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2010/02/06 16:57:07


Q: How many Space Marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. The Emperor IS MY LIGHT!!!

Azezel wrote:I believe they've tried that. thirteen times in fact... Fourteen if you count that Horus thing.
 
   
 
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