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Fortunately, after a close call with both Tzeentch and Slaanesh aboard the "outta Dodge", Max was picked up by an inbound shuttle and ferried down to the surface of NutWilcom.

Unfortunately the shuttle was actually the ship he was just on, he had traveled back in time somehow and was heading towards the planet at an uncontrollable speed again.

Fortunately, the ship blew up stopping him from hitting the planet.

Unfortunately, he was thrown out of the ship and started heading towards the planet...totally unprotected

Fortunately, he was an Ogryn, and his super-thick skull acted as a heat shield.

Unfortunately, he was still going to fall quite a long way.

Fortunately, the planet was covered in sponge.

Unfortunately, there was quite a few Spiky rock formations in the sponge.

Fortunately he only nicked his scalp as he grazed the spiky rocks, landing mostly on soft, soft sponge.

Unfortunately, Nurgle infected the scalp wound

Ninjaowned

Fortunately, he was able to absorb most of the Infection using a handy sponge he found somewhere.

Unfortunately, this was nurgle and there were still billions of diseases left in him from it.

Right, I'm moving this on:

Fortunately, the emperor appeared and banished all chaotic infestations from max, making him completely immune, then dissapeared back to Terra.

Unfortunately, this lead to a Tyranid invasion of the sponge planet.

fortunately, max was a hungry ogryn and ate a lot of the tyranid spores as they landed

Edit: Simulpost!

Unfortunately, Max realized it was impossible to eat tyranids after all, so he burrowed deeper into the sponge to hide. He stumbled upon some strange, glowing creatures in a cavern deep below the surface... and was drawn to them like a moth to a light.

Fortunately, and unlike a moth, he was not burned to a crisp.

Unfortunately, as Max got closer he realized the glowing creatures were actually the bulbous, brain-heavy tyranids commonly called Zoanthropes. These creatures seemed to be coordinating the tyranid attack above... and were desperately searching for the Inquisitor that had been enroute to the planet.

Even more unfortunately, the secrets that Inquisitor had carried were now in Max's dim-witted possession... and about to be handed over to the Hive Mind!

Fortunately, Zoanthropes have no eyes.

Unfortunately for Max, one of the Zoanthropes sense his presence and unleashed a devastating telepathic attack on his pea-sized brain!

Fortunately, max has a pea-sized brain. He suffered a mild headache as a result.

Unfortunately, a minor headache in a pea-sized brain is like setting off a firecracker in an anthill...

Fortunately, Max blacked out before he had a chance to realize the excrutiating pain he was in. He woke up to find himself tentacled-down inside a tyranid HiveFleet ship, but by some incredible stroke of luck, he was alone in the chamber- for now...

Unfortunately the chamber was actually the mouth of a large angry bio titan.

fortunately Max the Ogryn had a case of bad stomach.... He deliverd a massive load o Orgyn "suprise" into said bio titan mouth

Unfortunately, the bio-titan loved it so he closed his jaws

Fortunately the Bio-titan had a toothache.

Unfortunately, the toothache was a couple genestealers gnawing on it.

fortunately Max loved to branch out in his love life, so Xeno Vs Ogryn threesome followed

Unfortunately, they used no protection, so Max had now AIDS...besides carrying a Xeno-spawn inside of him, that would eventually burst out and kill him