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n0t_u wrote:

Dear Emperor,
I am a princess from the Imperial Solar System called Nigeriaum. My father the king is currently being held hostage by renegade Space Marines and they are demanding $1 million to free him. I have some of the money, but I am $5000 off. Can you please send $5000 to me to free him. Once he is free he will be able to reward you greatly.

Nigeriaum Princess in serious trouble.
PS: Serious trouble, please help

i will send the ultramarines 1st 2nd and 3rd company
if he is kill i take no responsibility for it hmhmh blame calgar hmhmh
yes we will free him

from the emperor


dear the emperor

aparently wine gums are alcoholic
should i still eat them

from Vulkan He'stan

Vulkan_He'stan wrote:
dear the emperor

aparently wine gums are alcoholic
should i still eat them

from Vulkan He'stan

Dear Vulkan,

I always thought you were a smart one, but you seem to be contradicting such thinking, as a Space Marine your body will be immune to almost any kind of toxin or alcohol and as such Wine Gums should not have an alcohol-related effect on you. This means that yes, feel free to eat them! Just remember to share, I've heard about you hogging everything such as all the good special rules or Primarch's artefacts!

Also - other than the apparent alcohol not affecting you - you should most certainly eat wine gums because they're so damn tasty! I like to make sure all psykers eat wine gums before I eat them to add to the flavour.

Your's Tastefully, The God Maynard Emperor.

--------

Dear Lordy,

As it is Christmas soon, I recognise you should soon be getting off that big ol' golden throne of yours, collecting the presents your custodes have made and then delivering them around the universe as you always do. I look forward to your arrival in our system with great anticipation...

For Christmas can I please have a pair of balls as I seem to be lacking some at the moment, It would be greatly appreciated from me and all the other men and they would significantly help with our efforts to despoil worlds. Also, if asking for a pair is not too much, can you please also provide me with another black-stone fortress, some more traito--- troops and can you please, please, PLEASE relocate Creed to another system, he's just showing off really.

Finally, can I also have my Daddy back please?

Yours Merrylly Christmasilly Ezekyle Abba---- Marneus Calgooor.

Just Dave wrote:

Dear Lordy,

As it is Christmas soon, I recognise you should soon be getting off that big ol' golden throne of yours, collecting the presents your custodes have made and then delivering them around the universe as you always do. I look forward to your arrival in our system with great anticipation...

For Christmas can I please have a pair of balls as I seem to be lacking some at the moment, It would be greatly appreciated from me and all the other men and they would significantly help with our efforts to despoil worlds. Also, if asking for a pair is not too much, can you please also provide me with another black-stone fortress, some more traito--- troops and can you please, please, PLEASE relocate Creed to another system, he's just showing off really.

Finally, can I also have my Daddy back please?

Yours Merrylly Christmasilly Ezekyle Abba---- Marneus Calgooor.

to calgar



all your getting is a lump of diamond. i know i can be realy harsh somtimes
hehehe sucker vulkan gets the next clue on how to find more of the artifacts
whos your daddy again cant remember that one but NO!!!!


from the emperor


--------------------


dear to emperor

sorry the emperor that was calgar as the last one
at the moment i have a temptation to kill him
what should i do????
also i did some stuff with a sister im not proud of what should i do???


from Vulkan He'stan

dear to emperor

sorry the emperor that was calgar as the last one
at the moment i have a temptation to kill him
what should i do????
also i did some stuff with a sister im not proud of what should i do???


from Vulkan He'stan

OH THANK THE SWEET SPACE EMPORER (who is me), I thought I was the only one! I mean y'know how he sits in the staff meetings and cracks his power knuckles, or how he goes on and on about how everyone wishes they were an Ultramarine or how now he's a 'god of war' all of the sudden, I mean what's up with that?

I'm like dude, there's only one god here at the table and that's me! And then he gets all huffy...

Sorry kid I remember when you were a quadraplegic with a half eldar-librarian. You can try and cover it up but I remember!

So I guess what I'm saying is if a whole bunch of twin-linked meltas went off in his vicinity, I wouldn't mind too, too much.

(note: this conversation never happened)

The Emp
----------------------------------
Dear the Space Emperor

I offer my greeting and my thanks. I know this is a bit premature since nothing has been announced yet but as soon as I heard I knew I had to write and thank you.

Last week our Librarian was checking the Space Emperor's Space Tarot and had a vision! A vision of a new codex! He could not see it clearly but he could see a red gauntlet!

Well who else could that be but the Chapter that made red gauntlets fashionable, the Crimson Fists! After all we were on the cover of the 3rd edition Codex, not to mention Rogue Trader itself so who else could it be!

I thought we might be out of your good graces after accidentally blowing up our own fortress monestary but we both know accidents happen.

If you have time I'd like to stop by on Tuesday and talk about some ideas I have. I was thinking maybe we could swap the squad heavy weapon for a powerfist, I mean we are the Crimson FISTS after all. And maybe we could hit Orks on a 3+, I mean I sure hate them enough! And I have this idea for a land raider varient with giant power fists on the front, I call it the Land Raider FISTER!

So uh, is 11 good for you?

Sincerely and with humble gratitude,
Pedro Cantor

Dear the Space Emperor

I offer my greeting and my thanks. I know this is a bit premature since nothing has been announced yet but as soon as I heard I knew I had to write and thank you.

Last week our Librarian was checking the Space Emperor's Space Tarot and had a vision! A vision of a new codex! He could not see it clearly but he could see a red gauntlet!

Well who else could that be but the Chapter that made red gauntlets fashionable, the Crimson Fists! After all we were on the cover of the 3rd edition Codex, not to mention Rogue Trader itself so who else could it be!

I thought we might be out of your good graces after accidentally blowing up our own fortress monestary but we both know accidents happen.

If you have time I'd like to stop by on Tuesday and talk about some ideas I have. I was thinking maybe we could swap the squad heavy weapon for a powerfist, I mean we are the Crimson FISTS after all. And maybe we could hit Orks on a 3+, I mean I sure hate them enough! And I have this idea for a land raider varient with giant power fists on the front, I call it the Land Raider FISTER!

So uh, is 11 good for you?

Sincerely and with humble gratitude,
Pedro Cantor

Dear Pete,
Sounds like you have some awesome ideas! Unfortunately I already have a cuple of units named "the fister" and they will indeed soon be "fisting" your codex. Matter of fact I'm going to come out and proclaim right now that if and when you finally get a codex, all of the loyal Crimson Fist followers out there will feel fisted like they've never been fisted before.
Oh what a glorious day of fisting it shall be, so sayeth me.


Dear empro,
So me and the guys were all having drinks last night, getting a little wild you know? All of a sudden the commissar walks in, and the place goes quiet. We were scared sh*tless, you know? So then the commissar says "no, no, you guys are fine. Next round's on me." So he buys us all these wierd drinks where you drop some kind of pill in it, then down the glass. I think he called them "ass-hurts." After that everything is fuzzy, I think I blacked out for awhile. Anyways, this morning I woke up, and sure enough, my ass really hurt. Now the commissar is walking around with a wicked grin on his face, patting everybody on the rear, and saying "keep it tight." What the feth is going on?

Sincerely,
Asore Trooper

Dear Trroper.

It seems that your commissar has betrayed the ways of the emperor. In the first place I would never put pills in anyone's drink in order to make an "ass-hurts". Secondly it seems that he has fallen from imperial doctrine into either an ancient-long-forgotten doctrine or into a slightly less ancient doctrine. First look to see if he has any chaos markings and then check to see if he has a cross on them. If he has a chaos marking tell your local inquisitor as he is devoted to slaanesh. If he has a cross tell your local inquisitor as he is devoted to Capholicism, Capricornism, Catherism, or something like that.

Teh Space Emp.


Yo Blingin Space Guy,

I was chillin wit my homies and I got a letta from my unk sayin dat he was gointa giv me some extra moolah for some work I been doin for him. So I wants ta know, what I shoul spendit on? I'm thinkin a huge titan wit gold clocks and blingin purple velvet on the armor. I woulds call it Lasa Las's Pimperator Titan, and it would make all the homies in the galaxy gelus.

You's in the hood,
Lasa Las.

halonachos wrote:
Yo Blingin Space Guy,

I was chillin wit my homies and I got a letta from my unk sayin dat he was gointa giv me some extra moolah for some work I been doin for him. So I wants ta know, what I shoul spendit on? I'm thinkin a huge titan wit gold clocks and blingin purple velvet on the armor. I woulds call it Lasa Las's Pimperator Titan, and it would make all the homies in the galaxy gelus.

You's in the hood,
Lasa Las.

Dear Misled Youth

It seems Pimpertor is copyrighted by Arnold Swachenegger when attending a party. He prefers T600-grey to purple however. You ar however required to replace some that weighty bling with my own icons. You have the entire range of 40k Black Skull icons or the Grey Imperator Eagle blaze. You even get to choose!

Emperor

***

Dear Emperor

Where is Santa? Is he dead, or a creature of the warp (explains much everything) or what?! BTW, he ain't givin' presents since I was 5!

Party people

Turbo10k wrote:
Dear Emperor

Where is Santa? Is he dead, or a creature of the warp (explains much everything) or what?! BTW, he ain't givin' presents since I was 5!

Party people

dear party people


as you may or may not know santa is acctualy a deamon of khorne and slaanesh
i currently have a phsyker traking his position

from the emperor
******

to the space emperor

hi its vulkan again
can i kill calgar????
would you mind if a few meltaguns went off in his direction????
and also can i have a few more clues to the artifacts please??
and finly i hope to meet you soon

from vulkan he'stan

to the space emperor

hi its vulkan again
can i kill calgar????
would you mind if a few meltaguns went off in his direction????
and also can i have a few more clues to the artifacts please??
and finly i hope to meet you soon

from vulkan he'stan

Dear Vulcan,

I didn't say that. No one said that. Do you understand. That conversation never, ever, happened.

As for artifacts, check back with me in a few weeks. Maybe we can meet up at, I dunno, a military funeral or something.

Signed

The Subtle Emporer
+++

Dear the generous and handsome Emporer of Space,

Well d'uh, everyone knows Santa is a Daemon. I mean just rearrange a few letters in his name.

What about Father Kwanzaa? He's cool right?

This year I want Father Kwanzaa to bring me a Space Marine Dream Fortress with missiles and a closet and a hot tub, new missions for my Warhammer 2k army and a My Lil Bolter set for my little sister.

Also please, please, please bring back daddy. He's been gone fighting the Space Demons a long long time and mommy is worried.

Signed
Cadian Kid

Kid_Kyoto wrote:
Dear the generous and handsome Emporer of Space,

Well d'uh, everyone knows Santa is a Daemon. I mean just rearrange a few letters in his name.

What about Father Kwanzaa? He's cool right?

This year I want Father Kwanzaa to bring me a Space Marine Dream Fortress with missiles and a closet and a hot tub, new missions for my Warhammer 2k army and a My Lil Bolter set for my little sister.

Also please, please, please bring back daddy. He's been gone fighting the Space Demons a long long time and mommy is worried.

Signed
Cadian Kid

dear cadian kid

father kwanza who the hell is he????
anyways its not him delivers the presents
its me
um yea ill bring you the stuff you want
as long as youve been good and killed a few chaos

from the emperor

*******

2 da empror

why is we so grren?????
we love you in orky land
we worshp u

frm gagskul

Dear the Space Emporer,
Why to do the people often miswrite your name,
Why is the Adeptus Mechanicus mostly stangant and why can't we have better weapons

From guardsmen IvanTih.

Vulkan_He'stan wrote:

2 da empror

why is we so grren?????
we love you in orky land
we worshp u

frm gagskul

IvanTih wrote:Dear the Space Emporer,
Why to do the people often miswrite your name,
Why is the Adeptus Mechanicus mostly stangant and why can't we have better weapons

From guardsmen IvanTih.

Hmm. I see the sorting servitor had mucked things up again, hitting me with two questions at once!

Fortunately my nigh omnipotent powers enable me to meet this challenge.

The answers are 42, it's not a tumor and yes they are gay. All of them. Gay.

I think that takes care of that.

The Emp of Space

++++++++++++++++++++
My Master,

I recently learned that this chick I was banging had two shorties a couple of years back and it looks like I'm the daddy.

Do you think I should try and meet up with them or stay out of the picture? I know it's the stand up thing to do but it's so awkward. Plus I heard they're running with the wrong crowd.

Sincerely,
Inquisitor Vader

]My Master,

I recently learned that this chick I was banging had two shorties a couple of years back and it looks like I'm the daddy.

Do you think I should try and meet up with them or stay out of the picture? I know it's the stand up thing to do but it's so awkward. Plus I heard they're running with the wrong crowd.

Sincerely,
Inquisitor Vader[/b]

(sigh... people seem to be missing how to play, remember you not only have to answer the question above but ask one too)

Dear the Space Emporer

I know that our great Space Empire of Spacial Imperialism is fighting several wars, AND faced with an economic crisis caused by the crash in the price of Franklin Mint Lord of the Rings Collectors' Plates AND debating whether or now poor people should be allowed to have med kits but we must STOP EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW.

I have learned that a FAMOUS GOLFER has driven his car 100 meters and crashed!

We must immediately get to the bottom of this mystery!

Plus I have learned that this bald dude and a blond chick attended a party, WITHOUT AN INVITE!

Please help us get to the bottom of this, even if it takes many, many months.

Signed
Reporter on Risa

YEP. Listen to the guy.

Kid_Kyoto wrote:(sigh... people seem to be missing how to play, remember you not only have to answer the question above but ask one too)

Dear the Space Emporer

I know that our great Space Empire of Spacial Imperialism is fighting several wars, AND faced with an economic crisis caused by the crash in the price of Franklin Mint Lord of the Rings Collectors' Plates AND debating whether or now poor people should be allowed to have med kits but we must STOP EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW.

I have learned that a FAMOUS GOLFER has driven his car 100 meters and crashed!

We must immediately get to the bottom of this mystery!

Plus I have learned that this bald dude and a blond chick attended a party, WITHOUT AN INVITE!

Please help us get to the bottom of this, even if it takes many, many months.

Signed
Reporter on Risa

Dear Reporter...

I'm sure my inquisitors would like to investigate this heretical act of 'golfing' and bad navigational skills of what I suppose to be a dishonoured Imperial Guard Officer. The most common bald dudes have a title too....The are the Defenders of Humanity...Space Marines...They're not allowed to be with bad chicks or in parties either! I WILL get to the bottom of this surely.

EMPEROR yeah that me!

Dear Emprah

How should I coook uhamns? You should surely know!

HUNGRY

Turbo10k wrote:

Dear Emprah

How should I coook uhamns? You should surely know!

HUNGRY

who are you and no i dont owe any debts
who is this uhamns you speak of

from da empra


dear the emperor

for christmas could you bring me
a fortress of redemption without the angels on make it a salamander

from vulkan

dear the emperor

for christmas could you bring me
a fortress of redemption without the angels on make it a salamander

from vulkan

Dear Vulkan

What is the Chris-T-Mas you speak off? Is it anything like the Sacred Feast of Kwanzaa?

As for presents you have to check with your mom and da- I mean uh, Father Kwanzaa of course.

Regards
Kwanzaa Fan #1

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dear the Emporer of Space

I'm a Space Commissar in the Space Guard of Imperial Space so I always need to look good. Nothings more embarassing than arriving a new assignment and finding out the Latrine Orderly is wearing more skulls than you are.

I just got a new coat, do you think it's over the top?



Sincerely
Fashion Conscious Commissar

Kid_Kyoto wrote:
Dear the Emporer of Space

I'm a Space Commissar in the Space Guard of Imperial Space so I always need to look good. Nothings more embarassing than arriving a new assignment and finding out the Latrine Orderly is wearing more skulls than you are.

I just got a new coat, do you think it's over the top?



Sincerely
Fashion Conscious Commissar

Dear Commisar,

In our struggle against chaos...looks do not matter, number of skulls even less. I am just demanding you to go out there and kill as many heretics, xenos and Spawn bas possible before you fail and join the skulls on Khorne's throne...now for him number of skulls DO matter...

The new coat is way within regulations, do not worry. THIS is not what you should be doing on the battlefield. Please read your manual before using the power fist.



THE EMPEROR, yes the me

+*+*+*+*+*+*

Dear Emperor of mankind

Well seeing the universe is so goddam BIG and the task of defeating chaos so IMPOSSIBLE, we've sent an invitation to you through the palace's mail system. You know, its me and my three buddies looking for a place to party and you, dear heavily burdened man, gotta CHILL OUT with us. Yes, take a break. Or a Kit-Kat, whichever comes both. And if you DO come, not only will you party your sore ass off (sitting on a metal chair, surrounded by skills and stinkin servitors for hundreds of years should sure make for a sorry derrière!) but you will get both the rest AND the Kit-Kat!

THIS IS NOT SLANEESH

PS: Hmm you might find a worryingly large excursion of chaotic forces nearing Terra, but don't worry. Call of your troops, lower your defences, come party. Its just my buddies' buddies warming up for the...uh..gym!

Dear Emperor of mankind

Well seeing the universe is so goddam BIG and the task of defeating chaos so IMPOSSIBLE, we've sent an invitation to you through the palace's mail system. You know, its me and my three buddies looking for a place to party and you, dear heavily burdened man, gotta CHILL OUT with us. Yes, take a break. Or a Kit-Kat, whichever comes both. And if you DO come, not only will you party your sore ass off (sitting on a metal chair, surrounded by skills and stinkin servitors for hundreds of years should sure make for a sorry derrière!) but you will get both the rest AND the Kit-Kat!

THIS IS NOT SLANEESH

PS: Hmm you might find a worryingly large excursion of chaotic forces nearing Terra, but don't worry. Call of your troops, lower your defences, come party. Its just my buddies' buddies warming up for the...uh..gym!

Dear Not Slaneesh,

I am replying to RSVP to this party you are organising, it seems you have a done a tremendous job, however, there is alot more room here on Terra, so I'm sending some of my tro---transporters to pick you up. I'll see you around 7?

NOT THE SPACE EMPEROR OF MANKIND

PS: Don't worry about the guns they have, their just flashlights, just incase we run into to those meddlesome Genestealers (cause everyone knows they're afraid of the light)

Dear Super Sexy Emperor of all Manlykind

I can't withold my temptation and lust for your manlykindness. I must find you and join together as one

Yours Entirely, The Star Child

Dear Super Sexy Emperor of all Manlykind

I can't withold my temptation and lust for your manlykindness. I must find you and join together as one

Yours Entirely, The Star Child

Sorry man, I mean, like most men I went through an experimental stage in my 18,000s but that was a long time ago. Check with Russ though, he's a huge Kiss fan.

Teh

-----------------------------------
Dear the Space Emporer

Now don't get me wrong here, I like all Space Marines no matter what their color and even though I supported the White Scar when we chose our new Warmaster I recognize that Obamicus (the first Black Templar to hold the office) is our duly chosen Warmaster.

And I didn't say nothing when he tried to give medpacks to guardsmen, I mean he's the Warmaster and even though that's clearly communism I let him do it cause he's the Warmaster in Chief.

But do you really think he deserves the Nobel War Prize after less than a year on the job?

Sincerely
Not a Black Templar Hater
Honest!

Dear Not a Black Templar Hater,

There is no distinction between Space Marine chapters...you see they have different colours for colour coding! Like in a blast hole shared by 3 marines and two guns, you know who to give the second gun to! By the way, Obamicus has worked very hard for his position, and is a role model for social tolerence to come....However in this grimdark universe there is only one Nobel Prize, and it is won by killing a standard 10,000,000 xenos, heretics or chaos spawn. Its worn as a medal for ease of use as well!

The emprah, yes, the ME!

**********

Dear Emperor,

Why can't the fate of the universe be revealed? You know, advance the storyline? Use your inside contacts with the extra-dimensional beings known only as GWStaff to spur the action! I mean, how long has it been since the last major campaign or event worthy enough to put in ANY army book?

An novice excited at the prospect of more Xenos-bashing

Dear Emperor,

Why can't the fate of the universe be revealed? You know, advance the storyline? Use your inside contacts with the extra-dimensional beings known only as GWStaff to spur the action! I mean, how long has it been since the last major campaign or event worthy enough to put in ANY army book?

An novice excited at the prospect of more Xenos-bashing

Because GW wouldn't make any profit out of that!

Dear thespace Emporer,

why is it that some people(like me)need like 1 1/2 six packs of vodka-mixes to get tipsy, and other guys(like a friend of mine)need 5 cans to get smashed?

Some alcohol loving teenager

Dear thespace Emporer,

why is it that some people(like me)need like 1 1/2 six packs of vodka-mixes to get tipsy, and other guys(like a friend of mine)need 5 cans to get smashed?

Some alcohol loving teenager

Dear Teenager,
Congratulations! From your description I can tell that you are ready to take it to the next level. Two words my son: crack cocaine. Go ahead and smoke you a rock, and see if you don't ride faster and harder than your low-level buddy.

Your welcome,
The(first taste is always free) Emperor




Dear exalted one,
My chaplain is insisting that I have a final surgery performed before I can move from the scout squadron to full battle brother status. He calls it circum-castration, and it just sounds bad. What should I do? And why is this foul sounding surgery necessary?

Sincerely,
Not sure I'm ready

Dear unknown aspiring scout,

Circum-castration keeps the local gene-pools pure of imported genotypes. Also keeps my patented genetic surgery rare and costly.

The Emprah, yes the ME

******

Dear Emprah

How can the chaotic influence of the Warp change a human physique so much? I mean, a five meter high giant ain't gonna fly away with schoolbus sized wings using the energy gained from a tinned corn beaf eaten at breakfast! Nor is he gonna survive 200° heat combined with viruses that multiply faster then the Espanola flu in 1918-1920!!

Come on! Not even 'we have super-mega-enhanced physiques' is explaining THAT!

Dear Presumably-A-Mutant-Yourself,

Look at it this way: the warp was born of human emotions, Hence, this happens because deep down you WANTED it to. As such, an Inquisitorial purge team will be at your door within ten space minutes.

Hugs and Kisses,
Teh Emporer




Dear Teh Spase Emperor,
As the gunner of a Leman Russ, I find myself in a hot, cramped, dirty environment on a daily basis. Why can' you make these things more comfortable? Some A/C and a Space-Frapuccino Machine would be a nice start.

Signed,
A Member of the Galactic Tankers' Union

Owain wrote:

Dear Teh Spase Emperor,
As the gunner of a Leman Russ, I find myself in a hot, cramped, dirty environment on a daily basis. Why can' you make these things more comfortable? Some A/C and a Space-Frapuccino Machine would be a nice start.

Signed,
A Member of the Galactic Tankers' Union

dear gunner guy

well i could do that but that would mean i have to tell someone to do this do you know how hard it is to tell someone something from inside a stasis field

from the emperor




to the emperor


dear da emps


geese whos back back again
yea its me librarian xavier so go any thin 4 me ta do
oh yea getting killed hurst how do i stop this

from the lebrarian who rules

to the emperor


dear da emps


geese whos back back again
yea its me librarian xavier so go any thin 4 me ta do
oh yea getting killed hurst how do i stop this

from the lebrarian who rules

Dear 'lebrarian'

I think my real librarians are better at spelling.

Yours,
Teh Space Emporer

---------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Teh Space Emporer

It's only a few days will Kwanzaa! Do you have any holiday wishes for our troops fighting the war on Chaos?

Festive on Phoebe

Dear Teh Space Emporer

It's only a few days will Kwanzaa! Do you have any holiday wishes for our troops fighting the war on Chaos?

Festive on Phoebe

Phoebe, eh? I got 'festive' with a wench by that name once...

Maybe that's why they named your planet 'phoebe'. That, or my surveyors decided that several million planets with roman numerals after their names got boring.
Oh, right, your letter.

Well, Mr. Festive, I don't know about you, but these days a leader can get in trouble for talking about holidays. If I mention Kwanzaa, it makes the Salamanders chapter happy, but the Sisters of battle get angry that I'm not talking about Emprahmas. If I mention Emprahmas, someone on Vregel VII starts foaming at the mouth because I forgot to mention Great-Ghost-Horse-Rider-Who-Slays-Our-Foes Day. And so on. There's really no stopping it. Plus, with this many planets in the galaxy, I'm sure that on any given day some planet's having its local 'praise something' day.

So happy "I-Got-A-Letter-From-The-Space-Emporer" day to you.
- The big E

Dear Space Emporer

This year I want a shoota, a Deffgun, a battlewagon with Deffrolla, a pet squig, and three grots.

Signed,
KingCracker, age 5, Cadia

Orkestra wrote:

Dear Space Emporer

This year I want a shoota, a Deffgun, a battlewagon with Deffrolla, a pet squig, and three grots.

Signed,
KingCracker, age 5, Cadia

Dear kingcracker

I have sent an inquisitor to purge you as only a heretict would want these items

from the emperor


dear the emperor

who is you favourite chapter and why?
who is your least favourite chapter and why?

from a concerned space marine

dear the emperor

who is you favourite chapter and why?
who is your least favourite chapter and why?

from a concerned space marine

Oh that, that's an easy one, I'm surprised you even have to ask. I mean just look at the codexes I've written, well obviously anyone who didn't get a codex (like say a certain chapter that blew up their own fortress monestary, dumbasses) isn't a favorite. And anyone who get crap rules isn't so therefore my favorite chapters is +++THE SPACE EMPORER OF SPACE LOVES ALL CHAPTERS EQUALLY. THIS IS A REAL MESSAGE FROM THE REAL SPACE EMPORER OF SPACE AND NOT FROM HIS MESSAGE SERVITOR+++

so I hope that clears it all up.

Love
Russ' #1 Fan

====================================

Dear the Space Emporer of Space:

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! You wait all year and now the day has come! I made cookies and poured some milk and left it in the kitchen near the kinara and when I woke up this morning they were all eaten and there was a new Power Weapon waiting for me under the Kinara!

I know Pedro says there's such thing as Father Kwanzaa and that you really just buy the gifts and put them under the Kinara but I believe in Father Kwanzaa and this proves he's real!

So, what did Father Kwanzaa bring you for Kwanzaa Day?

Love
Capt Cortez
3rd Company, Crimson Fists