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Orks are very much a simple culture

yup^^

"Tonight is da meetin' wit' da uvva warbosses and me bruvvas 'bot da WAAAGH!!!, I kin feel dis is it! soon we kin smash dat world of Humies and dat'll be a nice poke in da eye fer 'em wot calls demselfs Da konfederacy!" Magnotz said as he walked back into the area of town where he held court, the Beerhall Of All.

"Just gotta remind Ragnotz ta git dem teef ta Tek' Sla an' den he kin make ready all da ships for da go!" He said as he sat on his Big Chair.

A grot quickly brought them all beer, then scampered off as fast as possible.

Back at the camps, Ragnotz was busy gathering the teef he needed for his price, "Dat Magnotz, allays shovin' me around' like I was some low boy or grot! I'll show's im! I'll shows 'em all who's da best!" for Ragnotz had a kunnin' plan!

Zagnotz arrived early, as usual for him, his nobz and he taking a table near the Big Chair and the tables near it. He tossed a bag at Magnotz' feet. It clunked like it had something in it, "Teef, extras fer more beer Bruvva!" Magnotz checked, the teef were still fresh. "Now dat's a good bruvva, Ragnotz is finally collectin' teef fer his share of da WAAAGH!!" Magnotz replied.

"Wot, dat lazy git had ta get a clunk on da 'ead ta get in gear? what a git!" Zagnotz said in response to that.
"Not a good Blood Axe iz 'e?" Both chuckled. "Cuffed 'im right good I did" said Magnotz, and the hall was full of laughter.


In the camps, Gragnotz made his way through Ragnotz' section, and found it a cluster field, to make way, he raised his arm, the hydraulics making a whining sound, and fired his big shoota in the air. His nobz cuffed lesser boyz out of the way. "Make way or I'll smash da lot of yuz!" he bellowed.

Ragnotz, recognizing who it was came forwards, "Jes collectin' da fee fer da WAAAGH-ificashun of me ships is all bruvva" Ragnotz said. and then, "Make a hole fer me Bruvva you gits!" Seeing the bruise on Ragnotz' face, he replied "I see 'Ole Magnotz had ta moti-vate ya! Hurr hurr!"

Ragnotz was angry, but knew how Gragnotz was , "So, ya still sides wiff 'im eh? Da one wot crunched yer arm ta pulp?"

"Meh! 'E beat me fair, like any decent ork would, you best get dat right in yer 'ead! His WAAAGH!!! will make us one of da great tribes ta evva take to da stars!" Gragnotz said as he brushed past his bruvva, "Whinin' 'bout Magnotz ain't Orky, iz more Oomie like it is."

"I'll show yaz, alla yaz! I got's a Kunnin' plan I does! I'l show wot kinda Boss I am!" he shouted at Gragnotz' back

Gragnotz shook his head and said to his Nobz, "Ain't right in da 'ead dat one" and he continued on to the BeerHall of All.

cool read!
left me with one question tho...do ork teeth grow back or are they lost forever? i guess they grow back...hmmm...not a good currency then...but heck who cares about inflation when you have to rebuilt everything continiously^^

also, do ork like cunning or more brutish behavior? i think the later as this would make a good tension for the story...with Ragnotz being not so powerful but now he wants to rely on inteligence...lol bright orks...thats the least the glaxy needs now...what comes next...nids that care for others?^^

vik

Ork teef grow back which is good because eventually, the ones used as currency rot away to dust., unlike Human teeth. This actually makes it perfect currency.

LOL! The Orks follow the Orky gods, Goprk and Mork, Gork is brutal yet cunning, while Mork is Cunning yet brutal

Blood axes also make Kommandoes, Orks that Understand camouflage and stealth

ah so not only dumb enemies they are...

the ones used as currency rot away to dust

sounds like elven gold^^ but you are right a currency that needs to be remade on a constant basis cant amount to masses...by the way... do other species teeth also count as currency? this would make a waaagh!! worthwhile...

Only human Gold Teeth, normal sized teeth are too weedy for their taste otherwise. Maybe Nid teeth would also work, but humans are only good for the machinery the Orks can take. Eldar are just too pansy for anything but as meat!

they eat eldars? lol...not much on them for a hearty meal, huh?

Yeah, Eldar are just too pansy!

lol

They are a weedy race! I had just a warboss and nob with doc to fight a farseer and his retinue, they assulted thinking that just their numbers would do the trick, but the S3 did not allow them to get much ion, and Feel no Pain rule helped if the Heavy armor failed. Power claws swiped the bulk of them away and the rest fled off the table!

well if we are all honest... we would all wet our pants if an ork would cross our way...don´t argue anybody with me about that...if you think you are man enough to tackle barehanded a manic bull you might have a chance...and then even only maybe...

Best way to deal with an ork, shoot 'em between the eyes!

there is an old german joke...:
Ich habe letztens einen Ork getroffen....Ach und wo?.... na zwischen die augen...

translation doensn´t do the pun justice...as there is a pun in the word "treffen" in english then met and hit... in german the same word...

so:
in translation pretty lame...

Viktor von Domm wrote:there is an old german joke...:
Ich habe letztens einen Ork getroffen....Ach und wo?.... na zwischen die augen...

translation doensn´t do the pun justice...as there is a pun in the word "treffen" in english then met and hit... in german the same word...

so:

Spoiler:

i met this ork recently...do say, and where?...well right between his eyes...

in translation pretty lame...

Seems dry British wit there.

depends all on context...kids used it in a very nasty way in anti jewish or even anti turkish context...thats where i know the joke from...

I do remember the anti-turkish sentiments from when I was in Neu Ulm in the 1980's

and it has gone some steps further...if we don´t be careful something horrible might happen...

I can imagine!

Orks are simple, they will fight anyone, no prejudice, just fight for the hell of it!, coz it's fun for them!

there is nothing so even minded as a big chopper... it trashes everybody...regardless of race, color, or religuious believes...aren´t our green hided friends the openminded ones^^

This is one of the few stories on Dakka that has pegged any interest. I want to read more. Good job man!

darksage wrote:This is one of the few stories on Dakka that has pegged any interest. I want to read more. Good job man!

Thanks! Keep watching this spot for more!

@Vik: Orks are equal opportunity trashers!

as evil...er... equal as they come^^

LOL! to be truly evil, you have to think, plot and conspire, the Orks just act on impulse, like naughty children built like gorillas!

now you draw an ugly image and even colored it...how am i supposed to get my kids from kindergarten today...lol

think i take my bolter with me...

Viktor von Domm wrote:now you draw an ugly image and even colored it...how am i supposed to get my kids from kindergarten today...lol

think i take my bolter with me...

There ya go!

The proceedings started as usual, Magnotz had to have his Nobz cuff a few surly individuals, and then they could start things off., He figured Ragnotz may be a little late as he needed to collect a lot of teeth.

He then stood and bellowed, a little wobbly from the Fungus beer he had drank. "Awright yuz gits! Dis 'ere meetin' iz fer da way we will do da WAAAGH!!!" he then punctuated that with a loud burp.

"Now, overall, I will lead da WAAAGH!!!, but my bruvvas will get their chances to do well for demselves." This brought a mix of approval and some anger as there were nobz hoping to prove themselves along with a few of the lesser bosses of the WAAAGH!!!

Magnotz brought things to order by crashing his Klaw into the tablem sending parts of it flying, as well as bottles and cups laden with beer in them.

"Lissen up ya lotz! I beat ya down well an' good, and you swore ta do as i sayz, an' I sayz dat iz how things will be!" His eye glared at them all, his git finda eye showed no one grabbing a weapon, they didn't apparently desire a fresh beat down from him.

"Awright! Now whilst I make fer da main planet, each of my bruvvas can go fer da next big ones, and da rest of yaz get's a piece of the action alongside a us or picking out the outpost worlds and moons, dis way we all have a piece a da pie!" That brought cheers all around, as well as when the grotz came back out with fresh trays of Fungus brew, this time with seasoned, roast squigs.

"Now we kin all ......" he was interrupted as the door slammed open, Ragnotz and his nobz each carrying a bag of teef. "All here Bruvva! all fer you to get da WAAAGH!!! started!" he stood tall in the middle of the Hall.

Magnotz stared Ragnotz down, "Go ter yer table and have some brew and squig, I was tellin' da ladz how we iz takin' out da world system of Narkutzk."

Ragnmotz and his boyz did just that. Magnotz then continued, "Once Nah-Kutz is taken we kin work at spreadin' da WAAAGH!!! to uvva oomie worldz, we will light the sector aflame wit WAAAGH!!!" he bellowed the last. All in the hall bellowed "WAAAAGH!!!" with him, even Ragnotz for he was an Ork, and all Orks loved a good WAAAGH!!!

"Now dat Ragnotz got his payment ta Tek' Sla collected we Kin get started, I wanna see more klans answer da call of da WAAAGH!!! and help us make dis sector all ours with da oomies werkin' fer us as da runtz dey are!" Magnotz said and trhe room was filled with loud laughter and WAAAAGH!!! shouts.

Meanwhile Ragnotz sat and worked out his kunnin' plan.

sososo...your going to smash your own creating of the konfereacy by those drunken orkses...ohoh...this does not bode well...this is me feeling the need for an emergency call to the inquisitor mikhail to allert the konfederacy of the upcoming orkinvasion...

Meanwhile Ragnotz sat and worked out his kunnin' plan.

now he wouldn`t, would he?