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another noteworthy fail... playign shooty orks. first time fielding my SAG models mind you

list fo 2x big meks w/ sag
2x10 gretchin w/ rith
2x 15 lootas.

deployed into two pieces of terrain grots behind lootas in front and around SAG basicall same setup on secodn piece of twerrain i win rolloff and go first.

turn 1

1st SAG roll ... models in D6 inches removed mos tthe grots and the ruth are goen as well as 9 lootas

2nd SAG same exact result

all morale checks failed.. terrain was all on the edge everything runs off the board

tabled myself turn 1 before they rolled a single dice

Havok210 wrote:I rolled a 1-filled Yahtzee when I defended 5 shooting wounds with my Terminators. Does that qualify as epic fail?

That is an Epic Fail,anywhere.

Avatar getting run over by a Chimera after rolling a 3 on 2d6 for armor pen on a death or glory test.

The store's first Trygon getting likewise instantly crushed by a devilfish in its first game when it likewise failed to penetrate the armor on a death or glory test

I was playing a chaos guy and he had abbadon the despoiler and kharn with many bezerkers in combat with my captain and his command squad, abbadon killed himself then kharn proceeded to kill 5 bezerkers. then i finished kharn.

G00fySmiley wrote:another noteworthy fail... playign shooty orks. first time fielding my SAG models mind you

list fo 2x big meks w/ sag
2x10 gretchin w/ rith
2x 15 lootas.

deployed into two pieces of terrain grots behind lootas in front and around SAG basicall same setup on secodn piece of twerrain i win rolloff and go first.

turn 1

1st SAG roll ... models in D6 inches removed mos tthe grots and the ruth are goen as well as 9 lootas

2nd SAG same exact result

all morale checks failed.. terrain was all on the edge everything runs off the board

tabled myself turn 1 before they rolled a single dice

Epic Fail.Can I play against you some time?

gh05tdemon wrote:Imperial guard versus schao- 400 pt game i was trying out my new elysians (IA vol4 rules). He brings in two marine squads and a sorceror. i fire 10 flashlights onto the sqquad with the sorcer attached and kill them all turn one . we stoped because it scared me that the flashlights did something.

Maybe the troopers decided to throw their power-bayonets that turn and got all headshots?

Abbadon tore through three guardsmen squads...Then the lone survivor from one stopped running, took a potshot at him and killed him. With a LASGUN

Necrons VS SMs in an 800 point game. The Necron player has the Nightbringer and 20ish Warriors. The Nightbringer eats the SM player's Captain in CC, so the SM player calls Tank Shock on him with an empty rhino. Nightbringer autopens(S10 base), rolls a 1 on the damage chart, and gets reduced from mighty Star-god to Roadkill.

I killed a unit of my friend's Genestealers in hand to hand with Jokero Weaponsmiths.

All these things happen?

Lord of Baal wrote:All these things happen?

Most of 'em. I imagine a few of the more outrageous ones WERE made up/exaggerated.

Like individual FW killing entire termie squads.

It could happen, as long as the FW all rolled like 6 and the Termies all rolled like 1. LOL

Gotta say a CSM lord with 2 wounds on him surviving 3 rounds of shooting and assaulting and single handily taking out my entire 1500pts of necrons(though the 2 liths and 5 warriors got phased out). I was completely speechless, and so was everyone else at the tournament.

mine would probably be.... I fired a plasma cannon from a devestator squad then it scatered back at me. it hit all five devs, and killed them all...

Space Marine commanders (mostly Calgar or Pedro) have a horrible habit of being killed in close combat to the few guardsmen of mine that are still left to attack back a lot of the time. Other than that it is quite fun for my enemy's big nasty monster to be tank shocked to death by artillery vehicles (my next Basilisk definately will have a lunatic waving a sword somewhere on it).

I killed Cato Sicarius in CC with Shadowsun back when I ran her. That was pretty cool

same game I killed Vulkan in CC with pathfinders.

What hand happened was I shot the crap out of them, but they always passed their saves and the Assault marines with them would fail all of thiers. when both squads finally caught thier respective Targets, their luck had run out and they got beat down.

Shadowsun still had all of her Drones and it was a 6 man squad of Pathfinders.

Iur_tae_mont wrote:I killed Cato Sicarius in CC with Shadowsun back when I ran her. That was pretty cool

same game I killed Vulkan in CC with pathfinders.

What hand happened was I shot the crap out of them, but they always passed their saves and the Assault marines with them would fail all of thiers. when both squads finally caught thier respective Targets, their luck had run out and they got beat down.

Shadowsun still had all of her Drones and it was a 6 man squad of Pathfinders.

What size was the game? Shadowsun is, I find, only worth it in big games.

Avatar with one wound left, charges a 10 man squad of regular Guardsman. Kills 9 . Lone sergeant with nothing but a laspitol, chainsword and flak armor . Yells "for the emperor " with my voice . Hits and wounds the avatar. Fails his save and down the deamon goes. Followed by victory lol

im2randomghgh wrote:

Iur_tae_mont wrote:I killed Cato Sicarius in CC with Shadowsun back when I ran her. That was pretty cool

same game I killed Vulkan in CC with pathfinders.

What hand happened was I shot the crap out of them, but they always passed their saves and the Assault marines with them would fail all of thiers. when both squads finally caught thier respective Targets, their luck had run out and they got beat down.

Shadowsun still had all of her Drones and it was a 6 man squad of Pathfinders.

What size was the game? Shadowsun is, I find, only worth it in big games.

2k.

Iur_tae_mont wrote:

im2randomghgh wrote:

Iur_tae_mont wrote:I killed Cato Sicarius in CC with Shadowsun back when I ran her. That was pretty cool

same game I killed Vulkan in CC with pathfinders.

What hand happened was I shot the crap out of them, but they always passed their saves and the Assault marines with them would fail all of thiers. when both squads finally caught thier respective Targets, their luck had run out and they got beat down.

Shadowsun still had all of her Drones and it was a 6 man squad of Pathfinders.

What size was the game? Shadowsun is, I find, only worth it in big games.

2k.

Meh, fair enough.

A Combat Squad was assaulted by a unit of Seraphim led by Saint Celestine. The Seraphim tied them all up, slapped small teleport beacons on them, and they were beamed away, and after the battle they were snuggled until they begged for mercy. They suffered greatly thereafter, as mercy was granted and their armor was mostly removed so they could feel the power armored females snuggling them better. Unfortunately, since the Space Marines were gagged, and couldn't speak, they couldn't remind the Seraphim to feed and water them, and they thirsted to death after months of being snuggled all day and night.

Aww, I made myself cry, because creatures dying of thirst is saddening... Maybe a little retconning...

They ALMOST died of thirst, but then their Chapter Master, finally noticing that some of his Marines were missing, asked his allied Sisters of the Flame if they'd seen the missing 5 Tactical Marines, figuring they were lost. He was then brought to the Marines, and noticed they seemed very thirsty. So he asked how long they'd been without water, and the Seraphim Superior paled at the thought of what had almost happened. Of course, the Seraphim had been enjoying the cuddles too much to notice that the Hellfire Marines were dying. But the gags were undone, the Marines' thirst was quenched, and they all lived happily ever after, fighting the forces of Chaos, the Imperium, and various Xenos.

Yup, near-death by thirst due to excessive cuddling.

Pouncey wrote:A Combat Squad was assaulted by a unit of Seraphim led by Saint Celestine. The Seraphim tied them all up, slapped small teleport beacons on them, and they were beamed away, and after the battle they were snuggled until they begged for mercy. They suffered greatly thereafter, as mercy was granted and their armor was mostly removed so they could feel the power armored females snuggling them better. Unfortunately, since the Space Marines were gagged, and couldn't speak, they couldn't remind the Seraphim to feed and water them, and they thirsted to death after months of being snuggled all day and night.

Aww, I made myself cry, because creatures dying of thirst is saddening... Maybe a little retconning...

They ALMOST died of thirst, but then their Chapter Master, finally noticing that some of his Marines were missing, asked his allied Sisters of the Flame if they'd seen the missing 5 Tactical Marines, figuring they were lost. He was then brought to the Marines, and noticed they seemed very thirsty. So he asked how long they'd been without water, and the Seraphim Superior paled at the thought of what had almost happened. Of course, the Seraphim had been enjoying the cuddles too much to notice that the Hellfire Marines were dying. But the gags were undone, the Marines' thirst was quenched, and they all lived happily ever after, fighting the forces of Chaos, the Imperium, and various Xenos.

Yup, near-death by thirst due to excessive cuddling.

How very...Slanneshi of you my friend Near-death by cuddling. Are you sure these are regular SOBs and not Daemonettes posing as them? Or just Daemonettes posing. In general. Man, I feel like that would be a great swimsuit issue...Daemonettes posing. MMMMMMmmmmm....

Whoops. Bad thought. I blame the phone call I just got a little while ago for putting me in a warped mood!

Pouncey wrote:A Combat Squad was assaulted by a unit of Seraphim led by Saint Celestine. The Seraphim tied them all up, slapped small teleport beacons on them, and they were beamed away, and after the battle they were snuggled until they begged for mercy. They suffered greatly thereafter, as mercy was granted and their armor was mostly removed so they could feel the power armored females snuggling them better. Unfortunately, since the Space Marines were gagged, and couldn't speak, they couldn't remind the Seraphim to feed and water them, and they thirsted to death after months of being snuggled all day and night.

Aww, I made myself cry, because creatures dying of thirst is saddening... Maybe a little retconning...

They ALMOST died of thirst, but then their Chapter Master, finally noticing that some of his Marines were missing, asked his allied Sisters of the Flame if they'd seen the missing 5 Tactical Marines, figuring they were lost. He was then brought to the Marines, and noticed they seemed very thirsty. So he asked how long they'd been without water, and the Seraphim Superior paled at the thought of what had almost happened. Of course, the Seraphim had been enjoying the cuddles too much to notice that the Hellfire Marines were dying. But the gags were undone, the Marines' thirst was quenched, and they all lived happily ever after, fighting the forces of Chaos, the Imperium, and various Xenos.

Yup, near-death by thirst due to excessive cuddling.

i just....WOW....i dont know what to say, only that i need to go hug my wife.

Sc077y wrote:

Pouncey wrote:A Combat Squad was assaulted by a unit of Seraphim led by Saint Celestine. The Seraphim tied them all up, slapped small teleport beacons on them, and they were beamed away, and after the battle they were snuggled until they begged for mercy. They suffered greatly thereafter, as mercy was granted and their armor was mostly removed so they could feel the power armored females snuggling them better. Unfortunately, since the Space Marines were gagged, and couldn't speak, they couldn't remind the Seraphim to feed and water them, and they thirsted to death after months of being snuggled all day and night.

Aww, I made myself cry, because creatures dying of thirst is saddening... Maybe a little retconning...

They ALMOST died of thirst, but then their Chapter Master, finally noticing that some of his Marines were missing, asked his allied Sisters of the Flame if they'd seen the missing 5 Tactical Marines, figuring they were lost. He was then brought to the Marines, and noticed they seemed very thirsty. So he asked how long they'd been without water, and the Seraphim Superior paled at the thought of what had almost happened. Of course, the Seraphim had been enjoying the cuddles too much to notice that the Hellfire Marines were dying. But the gags were undone, the Marines' thirst was quenched, and they all lived happily ever after, fighting the forces of Chaos, the Imperium, and various Xenos.

Yup, near-death by thirst due to excessive cuddling.

i just....WOW....i dont know what to say, only that i need to go hug my wife.

Just give her water and don't gag her. Otherwise you'll be treating her like a Space Marine in this epic tale Actually, based on this story...I'm pretty sure that could be labeled as spouse abuse. We need your name and address good sir (or ma'am) so we can report you to the proper authorities. Once again...I blame this on my phone call

Most definitly. Cuddling is a deadly weapon.


Its actually plan B for the Cat World Domination Association. If the humans stop complying, turn off the safety on all cuddlers.

Pouncey wrote:A Combat Squad was assaulted by a unit of Seraphim led by Saint Celestine. The Seraphim tied them all up, slapped small teleport beacons on them, and they were beamed away, and after the battle they were snuggled until they begged for mercy. They suffered greatly thereafter, as mercy was granted and their armor was mostly removed so they could feel the power armored females snuggling them better. Unfortunately, since the Space Marines were gagged, and couldn't speak, they couldn't remind the Seraphim to feed and water them, and they thirsted to death after months of being snuggled all day and night.

Aww, I made myself cry, because creatures dying of thirst is saddening... Maybe a little retconning...

They ALMOST died of thirst, but then their Chapter Master, finally noticing that some of his Marines were missing, asked his allied Sisters of the Flame if they'd seen the missing 5 Tactical Marines, figuring they were lost. He was then brought to the Marines, and noticed they seemed very thirsty. So he asked how long they'd been without water, and the Seraphim Superior paled at the thought of what had almost happened. Of course, the Seraphim had been enjoying the cuddles too much to notice that the Hellfire Marines were dying. But the gags were undone, the Marines' thirst was quenched, and they all lived happily ever after, fighting the forces of Chaos, the Imperium, and various Xenos.

Yup, near-death by thirst due to excessive cuddling.

This is probably the strangest thing I've read in a while.

coolyo294 wrote:

Pouncey wrote:A Combat Squad was assaulted by a unit of Seraphim led by Saint Celestine. The Seraphim tied them all up, slapped small teleport beacons on them, and they were beamed away, and after the battle they were snuggled until they begged for mercy. They suffered greatly thereafter, as mercy was granted and their armor was mostly removed so they could feel the power armored females snuggling them better. Unfortunately, since the Space Marines were gagged, and couldn't speak, they couldn't remind the Seraphim to feed and water them, and they thirsted to death after months of being snuggled all day and night.

Aww, I made myself cry, because creatures dying of thirst is saddening... Maybe a little retconning...

They ALMOST died of thirst, but then their Chapter Master, finally noticing that some of his Marines were missing, asked his allied Sisters of the Flame if they'd seen the missing 5 Tactical Marines, figuring they were lost. He was then brought to the Marines, and noticed they seemed very thirsty. So he asked how long they'd been without water, and the Seraphim Superior paled at the thought of what had almost happened. Of course, the Seraphim had been enjoying the cuddles too much to notice that the Hellfire Marines were dying. But the gags were undone, the Marines' thirst was quenched, and they all lived happily ever after, fighting the forces of Chaos, the Imperium, and various Xenos.

Yup, near-death by thirst due to excessive cuddling.

This is probably the strangest thing I've read in a while.

Says the guy whos Sig includes the phrase "Grand High Poobah"

Grey Templar wrote:

coolyo294 wrote:

Pouncey wrote:A Combat Squad was assaulted by a unit of Seraphim led by Saint Celestine. The Seraphim tied them all up, slapped small teleport beacons on them, and they were beamed away, and after the battle they were snuggled until they begged for mercy. They suffered greatly thereafter, as mercy was granted and their armor was mostly removed so they could feel the power armored females snuggling them better. Unfortunately, since the Space Marines were gagged, and couldn't speak, they couldn't remind the Seraphim to feed and water them, and they thirsted to death after months of being snuggled all day and night.

Aww, I made myself cry, because creatures dying of thirst is saddening... Maybe a little retconning...

They ALMOST died of thirst, but then their Chapter Master, finally noticing that some of his Marines were missing, asked his allied Sisters of the Flame if they'd seen the missing 5 Tactical Marines, figuring they were lost. He was then brought to the Marines, and noticed they seemed very thirsty. So he asked how long they'd been without water, and the Seraphim Superior paled at the thought of what had almost happened. Of course, the Seraphim had been enjoying the cuddles too much to notice that the Hellfire Marines were dying. But the gags were undone, the Marines' thirst was quenched, and they all lived happily ever after, fighting the forces of Chaos, the Imperium, and various Xenos.

Yup, near-death by thirst due to excessive cuddling.

This is probably the strangest thing I've read in a while.

Says the guy whos Sig includes the phrase "Grand High Poobah"

Clearly, I'm just channeling this guy:

I was paying a 500 point 3 person free for all with my guard. I had 2 penal legion squads, a leman russ demolisher, and a command squad. i was playing space wolves and orks. space wolves obliterated the first penal legion squad, orks killed the second and my command squad, and the demolisher scatered on to itself, then exploded. I killed a few orks, that is all.

timetowaste85 wrote:

Pouncey wrote:A Combat Squad was assaulted by a unit of Seraphim led by Saint Celestine. The Seraphim tied them all up, slapped small teleport beacons on them, and they were beamed away, and after the battle they were snuggled until they begged for mercy. They suffered greatly thereafter, as mercy was granted and their armor was mostly removed so they could feel the power armored females snuggling them better. Unfortunately, since the Space Marines were gagged, and couldn't speak, they couldn't remind the Seraphim to feed and water them, and they thirsted to death after months of being snuggled all day and night.

Aww, I made myself cry, because creatures dying of thirst is saddening... Maybe a little retconning...

They ALMOST died of thirst, but then their Chapter Master, finally noticing that some of his Marines were missing, asked his allied Sisters of the Flame if they'd seen the missing 5 Tactical Marines, figuring they were lost. He was then brought to the Marines, and noticed they seemed very thirsty. So he asked how long they'd been without water, and the Seraphim Superior paled at the thought of what had almost happened. Of course, the Seraphim had been enjoying the cuddles too much to notice that the Hellfire Marines were dying. But the gags were undone, the Marines' thirst was quenched, and they all lived happily ever after, fighting the forces of Chaos, the Imperium, and various Xenos.

Yup, near-death by thirst due to excessive cuddling.

How very...Slanneshi of you my friend Near-death by cuddling. Are you sure these are regular SOBs and not Daemonettes posing as them? Or just Daemonettes posing. In general. Man, I feel like that would be a great swimsuit issue...Daemonettes posing. MMMMMMmmmmm....

Whoops. Bad thought. I blame the phone call I just got a little while ago for putting me in a warped mood!

Well, they aren't QUITE regular Battle Sisters... They've been turned against the Imperium, coming to see it as the monstrous place that it is through the use of powerful xenos mind-altering technology. They still know and revere the Emperor, and they're most certainly not allied with Chaos.

They're also a bit more... open... when it comes to affection... to put it mildly. Although daemonettes posing as Sisters of the Flame might be good for an RP sometime with the Chapter Master of the Hellfire Marines... Mmm, I can only imagine the sorts of places that RP would lead to...