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Granted. There is now some seriously ugly people running around, you havn't changed, but the curve got downgraded for everyone else.

I wish for a clown mask.

Granted but its glued to your face so now, in addition to playing games, you will never find a woman.


I wish people would stop resurrecting ancient threads.

Granted. instead they just create new, identical threads.

I wish I could get a freaking job.

Granted. You get a freaking job with a traveling carnival freak show.

I wish things were fun again.

Granted, but there is so much fun that soon people have to find new ways to have fun because the old idea of fun got boring so they build arenas and begin purging the White people. Hispanic supremacy!

I wish that Games Workshop had a Buy One Get One Free policy for their products.

Granted, but they raise their prices by 300%, making the policy pointless.

I wish I could get a vacation.

Granted. You get 1 hour of vacation time per year of service to the company.

I wish to go to Florida again.

Granted, but while your there a B-52 accidentally flies over the city and drops twenty warheads. Have fun enjoying the radioactive heat, it'll give you a very nice tan.

I wish I could go to China again.

Granted, but you're bags are lost and sent to South Africa.

I wish I was a tactical genius.

Granted: at the loss of all common sense, social ability and memory (and you lose control of your left leg)

I wish I could get some sleep, and lots of it.

Granted. But you never wake up.

I wish my computer was faster.

Granted, but a giant virus jumps out of the computer and tries to kill you.

I wish Perth wasn't the most isolated city in the world.

Granted. its the most Infested city in the world.

I wish my coworker could read a ruler.

granted but but he mistakes inches for centimeters

I wish, I wish, with all my heart, to fly with dragons in a land apart

Granted. You and your miniature dragons fly out of an airplane over Libya.

I wish for more Hobbit 3 previews.

Granted, unfortunately the movie itself becomes terrible as a result of your wish and you have the entire LOTR fandom pissed at you.

I wish tBoFA will be amazing.

Granted. But tBoFA is a new bounty hunter in Disney's upcoming Star Wars movies, and is so amazing he's spun off into his own trilogy and animated series.

I wish to get all my stuff finished on time.

Granted. But then a kid eats too much sugar and goes hyperactive, destroying the stuff you just finished in the process.

I wish I hadn't just accidently cut myself on the testicle.

Granted. You did it on purpose.

I wish I could understand how that could possibly happen.

Granted. He plays dark eldar way too seriously.

I wish i didnt have to go to work at 0745 after ssleeping om the couch.

Granted. You have to go to work at 2 in the morning.

I wish for all of snurl's porn to be deleted.

Granted. It happened 29 years ago before I got married. But all of Sing your life's porn just vanished as well.

I wish for more skeletons.

Granted, but you're level is to high to get any experience from them, and they only drop around 3 copper pieces.

I've been on this site for over a year, and have yet to find where DakkaDakka sells dakka.

I wish I could find some more dakka!

Granted.
http://www.dakkadakka.com/core/news.jsp
But you aren't allowed to read it.

I wish for better glow in the dark paint, in colors other than yellow green.

Granted. It glows so brightly your eyeballs explode. And the colour is green yellow.

I wish for a set of xtracrylic paints.

Granted. But unfortunately you have no bottles or lids to keep them in, and they slowly dry as they drip through your fingers.

I wish for better luck at setting up Circus Tents.

Granted. You have no problems setting up the tent. But when set it up it suddenly falls down and explodes your eyballs.

Yoink, free wish for me. I wish you were attacked by spaghetti!

Second wish: I wish all the frogs in the world had a grudge against snurl.

Granted. Frogs hate me but they hate spaghetti more so they eat Sing your life.

I wish for a handy place to rent an elephant for a few hours.

Granted, but it's a killer elephant and goes a rampage, now you have to play the damages.

I wish for a goldfish.