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Granted. You sleep for one hundred years. When you awaken you find yourself in a circus freak show, and they aren't too happy about you waking up.

I wish the neighbors would rake up their leaves. (here we go again)

Granted. They rake them under your blue lead based paints, and inferior metals Camero and in the process scratch the paint..

I wish i won the megabucks last night.

Wish Granted. You win the money but you soon find yourself broke, addicted to drugs and just plain worse off then how you started.

I wish for more wishes.

Granted, you get another wish, but it must be spent on getting another wish, and so on.

I wish I had a bigger house to hold all of my stuff.

Granted. All of your stuff is much smaller, including furniture and appliances.

I wish our township collected leaves in the fall like some other ones do.

Granted. Leaf collecting becomes an addiction around town, and then a twisted fetish. Using a search site, you soon learn you have 3 sexual leaf deviants living in your neighborhood.

I wish to see the Aurora Borealis

Granted. Masked Cultists drag you to the Arctic Circle where you see the incredible display. Then you freeze to death.

I wish I could hire one of these leaf lovers to rake my yard.

Granted, They notice you made a typo with "rake".


I wish the world wasn't going through a chocolate shortage.

Granted. There is no chocolate, never was any.

I wish everyone would vote for my mini I just finished.
http://www.dakkadakka.com/gallery/661319-Headless%20Horseman.html?m=2

Granted. 1/1 . (8/9)

I wish I had a better camera.

Granted. You go from this:

To this:


I wish heating oil wasnt $4 a gallon.

Granted, it now costs 4 british pounds.

I wish I was better at playing 40k.

Granted. You do LARP 40K and you are the best.

I wish for some storage space.

Granted or should I say YYYYUUUPPPPP:


I wish this thread would stop.

Granted. You stop looking at it, and after a time forget all about it.

I wish this forum was as busy as it used to be.

Granted, it has even less participants but we all post more to compensate. (So basically just me and Snurl, and Guardsman Bob...)

I wish more people posted on this thread.

Granted. This thread replaces FaceBook as the dumping ground of society.

I wish it had not snowed here tonight.

Granted, instead it rained acid.

I wish the magic painting fairy would come and paint Nagash for me.

Granted. Unfortunately, the rat king attacks just as the fairy is beginning to paint. (*que the Nutcracker) The toy soldiers are unable to assist because they are all locked into a carrying case. The Nutcracker has not been put out for the holidays yet, and it too can be no help. The Fairy puts up a good fight but is at last overwhelmed and defeated by the vile rats. In the morning, you find Nagash lying on his side with a walnut jammed where his mouth should be, covered in sugar plum colored fairy blood.

I wish the holidays had not come around again so soon.

Granted. No more holidays. Ever.

I wish I had that laptop I'm supposed to be getting at Christmas by tomorrow. My gaming needs are going unsatisfied, dammit!

Granted. It's an old refurbished Dell inspiron. Enjoy playing that Ultima Online. (I still do)

I wish I were a super saiyan.

Granted. Frieza clocks you when you aren't looking.

I wish i knew which new video game system was best.

Granted. Sadly, all the best games are on the other not-best systems.

I wish Markiplier would hurry up and win/post Ten Twenty mode of Five Nights at Freddy's.

Granted. Since the genie has no idea what you're on about, you get five nights with Freddy Kruger instead.

I wish my cat would come home.

Granted, but it has explosive diarrhea.

I wish Call of Duty wasn't repeating the same plot with each release.

Granted. Now you have to help put all the ponies to bed after giving them their dinner, while singing sweet lullabies.

I wish to live-fire a Hotchkiss Rifle.

Granted but you get arrested for not having the correct permits to do so.


I wish I didnt work retail this time of year.

Granted. You are off at sea for months on a Chinese Shrimp Boat.

I wish permits were easier to get.

Granted, you can get permits from those quarter slot machines in the stores now, and so can everyone else.

I wish I was canon.

Granted. You are canon, your word is law. But then a new edition is released and you are suddenly obsolete.

I wish for a cannon.