Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

Granted. You live in a cardboard box. But hey, at least you don't have a garden anymore.

I wish resin wasn't such a bitch to work with.

Granted. It's a pleasure to work with, but extremely toxic. Even to the touch.

I wish pomegranate juice didn't stain my hands.

Granted. It acid burns your hands instead.

I wish I could do any accent I wanted.

Granted. You are deported from many countries as a result.

I wish for a happy anniversary.

Granted. Unfortunately for the picnic you planned(a reminder of your first date) it rains. Sheltering together under the gazebo you begin to make the best of it, and unpack your picnic basket. To your horror, you forgot the bread. Fed up, your spouse suggests you head home. Running through the rain you get to the car, only to find it locked. After several hours you both finally make it home, and as you snuggle together she forgives you for botching the picnic, and says she still had a great time if just for the hilarious story. Just as you burn dinner.
(Congrats on your anniversary)

I wish I get this weekend off.

Granted. You sleep through to Monday morning.

I wish it didn't rain so much in the UK.

Granted. It never rains in the UK. Just hail, 24/7.

I wish I knew what was going on at Mantic Games.

Granted. After sneaking in through the ductwork to learn all of their secrets, your pants leg gets caught on a nail. After struggling for several minutes the duct gives way beneath you(which your pants still stuck on the nail). The police arrive to find you half naked in the lunchroom.

I wish to never suffer from heartburn.

Granted. Your heart is stolen by organ-thieves for transplant.

I wish Mantic Games would make good on it's commitments.

Granted. You get a bonus serving of good grammar.

I wish for a good plot.

Granted. You find yourself alone at home. The phone rings. Only heavy breathing answers, and then hangs up. Lightning flashes outside, illuminating the dark room. You see a shadowy figure in the corner, and then in another flash it disappears. You quickly realize you're in the plot of a great horror movie.

I wIsh to have a great weekend.

Granted. You spent the entire time trying to retrieve your car keys from below a drainage grate.

I wish to not run out of beer this weekend.

Granted. You run out on Friday instead.

I wish for a b&b.

Granted. You find yourself the owner of a run down Bed&Breakfast in New Jersey. Property taxes are through the roof, and because of the location it'll never get renters(or another buyer). You're stuck with the burden until your grave.

I wish for an ice cold glass of Dr. Better.

Granted. Dr. better is run through a hydraulic press. His juices are chilled and served to you. Bottoms up!

I wish this weekend had less drama and power outages.

Granted, you put off repairing your roof instead, and it falls on you.

I wish that I could actually afford to start a Solar Auxilia army

Granted. Thanks to a slip on a banana peel, a relative you barely know left everything to you. The only stipulation is that you can only spend the money on education and housing. You can afford almost anything, but can actually buy nothing.

I wish a store near me sold the Battle for Vedros stuff.

Granted. The store next door sells it, but it's on "backorder".

I wish I had not overdone it with the yard work this week.

Granted, you overdo it on the yard work NEXT week.

I wish that so many of my wishes wouldn't get corrupted

Granted. Now only the wishes you really really want to come true get corrupted.

I wish i didn't like to sleep in so much.

Granted, you hate sleeping in, so you only sleep for 4 hours each night and are constantly tired as a result.

I wish I could decide between starting Eldar or starting Dark Eldar.

Granted. You choose the wrong one, and play only grey eldar as a result.

I wish next time I take vacation I actually relax instead of doing yard work all week.

Granted. You take your next vacation to Florida, and spend most of your time in line or in traffic.

I wish GW paints dried faster.

Granted. You buy a pot of the new fast drying paint only to get home and its dried out in the pot.

I wish customer support was improved.

Granted. You are now only on hold for 20 minutes before being connected to an automated system that is no help at all.

I wish I could stop looking at GW new releases.

Granted. Your eyes are blinded for eternity.

I wish my LGS stayed open late on Sundays. Or was open 24/7.

Granted. The really nice manager dies from cardiac arrest due to stress and sleep deprivation.

I wish there was more time in the day to do what I wanted.

Granted. But it is not this day.

I wish to get motivated.

Granted. You find yourself with a hungry tiger on a treadmill- don't slow down! You've got this! Today is the day you outrun the tiger! You can do it if you imagine it!

I wish I didn't have to spend the night in Memphis.

Granted. You have to spend the night in a shack in the hills outside of Memphis with the cast of Deliverance.

I wish for a memorable occasion tomorrow.