corrupt a wish!

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**grayshadow87**

Granted. You never wake up and starve to death.

I wish for a tasty, non-tainted, hamburger.

**snurl**

Granted. The perfect burger hovers above you, always just out of reach, for the rest of your days.

I wish the people who moved away had bothered to take their pets with them.

**grayshadow87**

Granted, but the new people who move in have pet diarrhea-plagued elephants.

I wish I could get someone to help me snag that perfect burger floating over my head who would then give me the burger after getting it for me.

**somewheresomehow**

Granted, but the burger is actually made from Soylent Green, you catch Mad Human disease, and die.

I wish I had an awesome Aliens inspired Tyranid army...

**snurl**

Granted. You had an Aliens inspired 'nid army and its awesome. Then you had an accident with sparkles and glue, and now they look like Twilight in space.

I wish miniature standard bearers are not so top-heavy .

**Overlord Thraka**

Granted. They are now just plain table-breaking heavy

Me wish me was smarterer

**somewheresomehow**

Wish granted... but it comes from having a brain tumor that causes your head to explode in 5 years.

I wish I was a better painter.

**snurl**

Granted. You paint the word "better" on everything you can see. (Until they haul you off.)

I wish miniature flags were made of some kind of cloth.

**Overlord Thraka**

Granted. They are made of cloth so ancient that the slightest touch disintegrates them

I wish it wasn't so hot here.

**somewheresomehow**

Granted, the next great Ice Age has now begun.

I wish I was the greatest poobah of the world!

**Grey Templar**

Granted, but being the greatest poobah means exactly ziltch.

I wish I had some winter clothing for that ice age.

**snurl**

Granted. A woolly Mammoth sits on you.

I wish for some ice skates.

**TheDiscoSpider**

Granted, but you can never take them off.

I wish I didn't need sleep to function properly.

**somewheresomehow**

Granted, but since your brain can't properly process the data it receives daily, your memory becomes that of a goldfish.

Time to open up the flood gates.

I wish I had infinite cosmic power, not limiting me to a lamp/bottle/item.

**Overlord Thraka**

Granted. Your power is being able to explode your own head whenever you say "the"

**Squigsquasher**

No wish!

You are ravished by furries. Male, overweight furries.

Yiff yiff.

I wish the stuff I ordered from eBay would arrive already! It's been 4 weeks!

**somewheresomehow**

Granted, but it isn't exactly what you ordered. It is video recordings of Overlord Thraka's non-consentual yiffing. In HD. The other package is one of the used fur suits.

I wish I had a cute maid.

**Squigsquasher**

Granted. She is adorable, kind, intelligent, loving, and caters to your every whim.

Sadly, she has a penis.

I wish I had your maid.

**somewheresomehow**

Squigsquasher wrote:
Granted. She is adorable, kind, intelligent, loving, and caters to your every whim.

Sadly, she has a penis.

I wish I had your maid.

I do not know whether this is a shota reference, a futa reference, or a thai lady boy reference. Two of the three are acceptable.

Wish Granted... unfortunately it is granted 20 years from now, after years of living in squaller and abuse. Hopes and dreams dashed, soul shattered.. all that is left is a husk of a creature.

I wish I could control the universe with a remote control.

**Grey Templar**

Granted, but the remote runs only on AAAAAAAAA batteries and nobody makes them.

I wish I had more cats.

**Squigsquasher**

(Really, it was a "how can I ruin your wish in a way I still won't really mind 'coz I'm weird like that" reference. Take it as you see fit. Definitely not Shota though. I may be a delinquent, perverted 17 year old, but I have boundaries)

Granted, unfortunately Kinect has to be plugged into it at all times. And it is always watching you. Even when you sleep. Even when you take a dump. Even when you **REDACTED BY INQUISITION**. Steve Ballmer pleasures himself to the sight of you, and there is nothing you can do about it.

I wish that I could lose weight.

EDIT: Damn. Ninja'd. Still works though.

**snurl**

No wish. You too are visited by the furries. Again and again.

I wish for a fun weekend.

**Grey Templar**

Granted, its fun. For everyone else that is. You however are thrown under a bus, furiously humped by a rabid weasel, and then fined for damages by the Department of Transportation.

I wish I had just a mediocre weekend.

**snurl**

Granted. It's so ordinary you would swear it's a weekday. You turn up for work on Monday thinking its Wednesday.

I wish the rain would stop long enough for me to mow my lawn.

**somewheresomehow**

Granted, but while you are mowing your lawn, a freak snow storm happens, and you are now shoulder deep in the heavy moist snow.

I wish that Kickstarter never existed, to keep my wallet from crying.

**Overlord Thraka**

Granted. Now you never will have the Drutter.
(Google it)

I wish for the 6th ed Ork codex will have the ork warboss with the battlewagon brigade

**grayshadow87**

Granted, but it also features fluff in which it is revealed that all Orkz are descended from unicorns and that, in the light of the Necron menace, their happiness and peacefulness begin to shine through to oppose evil.

I wish I had a unicorn (one of the bad-ass people stabbing kind) and that it would only stab the people I told it to stab at.

**snurl**

Granted. You have a stabby unicorn. But it is imaginary, and leads to your rapid institutionalization.

I wish mowing the lawn was not required.

**Squigsquasher**

Granted. This is because you are under the dominon of our new grassy overlords. When we grow too tall, they bloodily decapitate us.

I wish Yoko Littner was real, and living with me.

**Overlord Thraka**

Granted. But now you live in a cardboard box.

I wish for a good 40k movie based around Orks