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Granted. You are 20,000 Leagues under the sea.

I wish for a way to make my cat stop catching chipmonks.

Granted. You have to kill it.

I wish for fun.

The idea of fun is twisted and turns into a Massacre.

I wish for the ultimate power to control the elements.

Granted. You have the power to control the heating elements in your toaster.

I wish for a BLT.

Granted. A BLT that was made in 1970.

I wish I was the Joker.

Granted, but your thrown off the roof of a ten story building by Batman and break every bone in your body.

I wish I could control an airline company.

Granted. Have fun dustin crops.

I wish Demigryph knights could actually be wounded by less than a cannon shot.

Granted, but they change the rules so that Demi-gryph knights are 5 points a model.

I wish to have every single Black Library novel.

Granted. They are delivered to your door on 5 inch floppy discs.

I wish my cat would go take a nap.

Granted. She takes a nap on your keyboard, accidently typing a post on this website that gets you perma-banned.

I wish for a new x-men movie.

Granted but it's only about Wolverine. And only Wolverine. As in there is nothing in the movie except Wolverine staring at the screen.

I wish for the new Star Wars movies to be good.

Granted, they are, but they attract hordes of "hipster" fangirls who haven't heard of the old films at all and think they are a rip-off.

I wish for my fingers to become very nimble.

Granted, You have very nimble fingers sadly the muscles are too weak to hold even the lightest of objects.

I wish Watchdogs was slightly better.

Granted but it still sucks.

I wish that I had a whole legion of lego clone troopers.

Granted. You have no idea where you put them.

I wish for calm weather.

Granted, the United States are now suffering the greatest drought in the history of the world. A burning hot sun and no wind at all.

I wish I played the actual games my miniatures belong too.

Granted. You play tournament: My Little Ponies.

I wish ranking up Miners was easier.

 snurl wrote:
Granted. You have no idea where you put them.

I wish for calm weather.

((Granted. You now live in Los Angeles))

Granted but they now need frequent breaks. Union rules.

I wish there would be peace in Mexico.

Granted. Mexico is an atomic wasteland.

I wish for some Mexican food.

Granted, Its Escamoles!

I wish i was both handed.

Granted. You can do everything with either hand with equally poor results.

I wish Maleficent had been a better movie.

Granted, it is slightly better. Still bad.

I wish for the cake to turn out well.

The cake looks perfect but tastes horrible.

I wish for a '70's coke party.

YWIG. You have a party focused around coca-cola with a 70s theme.

I wish to have amazing painting skills!

Granted, you're fantastic at painting your rooms.

I wish Cannabis would be legalised.

Granted, You now live in North Korea where canabis is legal. All hail your glorious leader.

I wish for a tiny clock tower to mount on a Ravenwing Dark Talon

Granted. You have a tiny clock tower but superglue wont hold it and it breaks into hundreds of tiny pieces when you attempt to pin it.
I wish for a good campaign.

The Campaign is all you had hoped for. To bad the horrible anti climactic ending ruins it.

I wish I could at 3 inches.

Granted. If that means what i think it does, no corruption is necessary. Good luck.

I wish for bigger pumpkins.

Granted, they are so massive they collapse into black holes.

I wish that joke could be funny again.