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Granted. But they were cut off so long they're all dead, and they bring them back as Zombie Squats.

I wish for some Zombie Squats.

Granted! But they cost £20 each, are tiny with terrible proportions and are cast out of fridge mould.

I wish I had this miniature:

https://www.coolminiornot.com/shop/54mm-nude-study-1.html

Granted. But the pages of the painting guide are all stuck together.

I wish my clowns were done.

Granted, they are done making you eat your eyes.

I wish Snurl would know that the 54mm nude study doesn't include a painting guide.

Granted, but they forget immediately.

I wish to stop procrastinating and watch Hannibal.
[EDIT] I also wish I could spell Hannibal correctly first time.

 Sgt_Smudge wrote:
Granted, but they forget immediately.

I wish to stop procrastinating and watch Hannibal.
[EDIT] I also wish I could spell Hannibal correctly first time.

Granted. However, Hannibal ceases to have ever existed, and you are the only person that remembers it.

I wish that I was better at painting minis.

Granted. your models are so radiantly perfect, you are concripted into GW and force fed nutrients and hooked up to life support as hey keep you spewing out minitures for their galleries for eternity... and your warden is a man by the name of Mathew W... *BLAM*

I wish i could elect to see the consequeces of every action i intend to take and plan my actions accordingy as to always have the best outcome.

Granted. You find that every action you can possibly make will have the same extremely negative consequences.

I wish for cheese.

Granted. You play Space Wolves.

I wish for a free copy of the End Times.

Granted. The only news is reporting that you are a douchebag.

I wish LCB didn't rape the fluff.

Granted. They just added some MLP and sparkly vampires here and there.

I wish to do more 1/1 scale modelling.

Granted. You never get any good clothes to model in.

I wish I could understand Snurl's thought process.

Granted, Now no one understands you.

I wish for a small fuzzy potato.

granted. so small you now have small fuzzy potato in your lungs, well either that of you just never breathe again, so theres you option, asphyxiation or fuzzy potato in lung syndrome.

I wish for more food, or money to buy more food with.

Granted. Someone teaches you how to fish. While he's distracted you steal his money and buy some food.

I wish everyone would come to visit me here:
http://www.jasonswoods.com

Granted, everyone (and I mean everyone) goes to that site and causes a DDOS due to the traffic.

I wish someone would sell me some Camo Skinks.

Granted. You can't find them.

I wish for cheeseburgers and beer this weekend.

Granted. They're in fact poisoned.

I wish for immortality.

Granted, you make it to WW3 and have to live being mutated by radiation for the rest of eternity.

I wish this wish wouldn't get Corrupted.

Granted. It's a wish to buried in vat of giant centipedes.

I wish I couldn't ever die.

Granted, you can never die but you spend all your life locked up in a single room, with no window, listening to justin beiber on repeat for all eternity.

I wish I wasnt so socially inept.

Granted. You are merely socially dysfunctional.

I wish for a new Avatar.

Granted. Everyone complains that your old one was so much better.

I wish to write a Macha fanfic where the farseer gets into a romantic relationship with an Imperial commissar.

Granted. You get ten pages in, then abandon the project to go play Call of Duty for weeks on end. In the meantime CS Goto steals your story and publishes it.

I wish to reverse the ageing process.

Granted, you age in reverse in seconds until you are nothing more then a cell, which is then destroyed by harmful elements.

I wish to have an Electrokinesis talent.

Granted. You can drain any battery just by being close by.

I wish my toy helicopter was easier to fly.

Granted, it is so easy to fly a child can fly it, but a child flew off with it.

I wish I had Kung-fu magic like in fist of the north star.

Granted, but then you are killed and dissected by your Government in order to find the source of your magic.

I wish I didn't have to poo right now.

Granted. You had to 20 minutes ago. Now you must wash up.

I wish for extra days in a week.

Granted. In those days you a strapped down whilst I cheesegrate your eyeballs.

Lofn is so cute. I wish to bang her.