Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

endlesswaltz123 wrote:
Considering the pure physical size of marines (and I'm not even guessing or talking about the size of certain organs in that region) I can't actually imagine it being a pleasant experience for women anyway, it may actually leave them incapable of bearing children....

Space Marines are 7'6" on average. That's not outside the realm of human possibility, as there are plenty of modern-day basketball players that near that height, if not match it. There's nothing magical about the height that makes your Little Marine suddenly incompatible with human anatomy.

Let's be honest, your dick isn't going to be bigger than a human child.

Saying they are 7' 6" is not the whole truth.

I have seen them be described as everything between six and nine feet.

BL tends to have some "creep" when it comes to the size of Space Marines. The GW studio itself maintains 7'6" averages.

 Psienesis wrote:
Let's be honest, your dick isn't going to be bigger than a human child.

Bad Psienesis, around here we say Richard.

 BrotherHaraldus wrote:
Saying they are 7' 6" is not the whole truth.

I have seen them be described as everything between six and nine feet.

 Psienesis wrote:
BL tends to have some "creep" when it comes to the size of Space Marines. The GW studio itself maintains 7'6" averages.

I don't think you quite understand what an average is.

I do, thank you very much. Unless you were referring to Psienesis.

Calculating the average is not necessarily the truth, as

1. Can you even be arsed to take in every source and calculate the average?

2. Who says the average even is correct?

 Psienesis wrote:

Let's be honest, your dick isn't going to be bigger than a human child.

Sig worthy.

 Psienesis wrote:

endlesswaltz123 wrote:
Considering the pure physical size of marines (and I'm not even guessing or talking about the size of certain organs in that region) I can't actually imagine it being a pleasant experience for women anyway, it may actually leave them incapable of bearing children....

Space Marines are 7'6" on average. That's not outside the realm of human possibility, as there are plenty of modern-day basketball players that near that height, if not match it. There's nothing magical about the height that makes your Little Marine suddenly incompatible with human anatomy.

Let's be honest, your dick isn't going to be bigger than a human child.

When you say that, do you mean that the space marine's phallus would not be as large as a whole human child, or his phallus would not be as large as that of a human child's?

I need clarification for academic reasons.

This can only be proven if Ron Jeremy's geneseed is used to make a marine chapter and so the shaft chapter was created famous for their insertion techniques and their problem of fitting into power armor!

 BrotherHaraldus wrote:
Unless you were referring to Psienesis.

I was actually, sorry.

 CthuluIsSpy wrote:

 Psienesis wrote:

endlesswaltz123 wrote:
Considering the pure physical size of marines (and I'm not even guessing or talking about the size of certain organs in that region) I can't actually imagine it being a pleasant experience for women anyway, it may actually leave them incapable of bearing children....

Space Marines are 7'6" on average. That's not outside the realm of human possibility, as there are plenty of modern-day basketball players that near that height, if not match it. There's nothing magical about the height that makes your Little Marine suddenly incompatible with human anatomy.

Let's be honest, your dick isn't going to be bigger than a human child.

When you say that, do you mean that the space marine's phallus would not be as large as a whole human child, or his phallus would not be as large as that of a human child's?

I need clarification for academic reasons.

Yeah, I was about to bite down on my pizza when I though ''Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait a minute does he mean a SM junk can be the size of a ki- ooooooh boy''

"The Inquisition make stupid mistakes and gak things up!"

There is no "The Inquisition" in the sense of a unified force working together.

Individual Inquisitors are free to pursue their agendas as they will. One Inquisitor deciding to evacuate civilians from a warp-tained planet and thus infecting an entire star system is not 'The Inquisition being stupid', it is the action of a single person.

Also the nature of the Ordos. The Ordo Xenos is not an army of alien hunters. Ordo Xenos Inquisitor is a name taken by Inquisitors who happen to specialise in dealing with xenos and have made alliances with other like-minded Inquisitors.

Space Wolves having a ridiculous number of marines. No, they do not have 10,000 marines hanging about.

 Furyou Miko wrote:

Also the nature of the Ordos. The Ordo Xenos is not an army of alien hunters. Ordo Xenos Inquisitor is a name taken by Inquisitors who happen to specialise in dealing with xenos and have made alliances with other like-minded Inquisitors.

Actually, THAT is a misconception. Codex: Inquisition certainly treats the various Ordos as entities in their own right, as opposed to just a gathering of like-minded individuals.

 Psienesis wrote:

endlesswaltz123 wrote:
Considering the pure physical size of marines (and I'm not even guessing or talking about the size of certain organs in that region) I can't actually imagine it being a pleasant experience for women anyway, it may actually leave them incapable of bearing children....

Space Marines are 7'6" on average. That's not outside the realm of human possibility, as there are plenty of modern-day basketball players that near that height, if not match it. There's nothing magical about the height that makes your Little Marine suddenly incompatible with human anatomy.

Let's be honest, your dick isn't going to be bigger than a human child.

It wasn't about it fitting, I'm sure it would... The problems I imagine come from the fact you have a 300-500kg guy, who has the strength and power of a small tank, has the dick... Can you really imagine a space marine, a guy who has been purposely crafted into a human weapon being gentle? And that's assuming the process doesn't enhance the growth of his wang either, the thing could be a foot long and have the girth of a coke can for all we know...

I doubt the size of the equipment is the main problem, it's more the fact that being intimate with a living tank might be bad for your health.

I'd be ripped in half in two seconds. I'd respectfully decline. :|

 AlmightyWalrus wrote:

 Furyou Miko wrote:

Also the nature of the Ordos. The Ordo Xenos is not an army of alien hunters. Ordo Xenos Inquisitor is a name taken by Inquisitors who happen to specialise in dealing with xenos and have made alliances with other like-minded Inquisitors.

Actually, THAT is a misconception. Codex: Inquisition certainly treats the various Ordos as entities in their own right, as opposed to just a gathering of like-minded individuals.

From dark heresy, you belong to an ordo, but mostly you belong to a conclave. Conclaves have inquisitors belonging to different ordos working as a group.

endlesswaltz123 wrote:
The problems I imagine come from the fact you have a 300-500kg guy, who has the strength and power of a small tank, has the dick... Can you really imagine a space marine, a guy who has been purposely crafted into a human weapon being gentle?

Well....actually, thanks to SisterSydney, I kinda can.

Hlaine Larkin mk2 wrote:

 BrotherHaraldus wrote:
Salamanders, although it is doubtful that they created said families post-Marinification.

Salamanders maintain contact with their families post Marinification. AFAIK they don't produce offspring but every so often go home for a free meal off mum (Or Great grand Daughter as could be the case)

I think that in itself is a misconception. From what I've read of the Salamanders, which I won't say is completely exhaustive - but I've read a good deal of Salamanders fluff both old and new, the Salamanders don't 'go home' in the common sense of going back for a cuppa and a catch up. Rather, Salamanders live within the communes of Nocturne as community elders, dispensing knowledge and advice throughout the community as well as safeguarding it. They don't raise families or go back for free meals (I know you probably didn't mean this in a literal sense).

Now, this next bit is purely my own conjecture, but it's more likely as well that, due to indoctrination, they aren't posted back to the same village they were raised from. Due to indoctrination smothering memories and emotions (Although Salamanders are known to have a far greater degree empathy and emotional attachment to humanity), they would recall little of their original family, and hence it would avail them of little use (other than upsetting said family) if they went back to their original commune - again, that's just my theory though.

BrotherHaraldus wrote:Saying they are 7' 6" is not the whole truth.

I have seen them be described as everything between six and nine feet.

I always consider the following to be approximately true (All dependent on natural variety of course):

Astartes un-armoured: Just above 7ft
Astartes in Power Armour: Between 7 and 8ft.
Astartes in Terminator Armour: 8ft
Primarch in Power Armour: 8ft
Primarch in Terminator Armour: Anywhere between 8ft-9ft for 'Standard Primarchs' (Larger ones such as F.M or Vulkan may be in the 9-10ft region I guess)

I hesitate to put the Emperor into a category. I could say 10ft, but he wasn't an Astartes, rather a powerful entity in human form. I often think he'd be roughly Terminator sized - larger than an Astartes, but possibly smaller than his Primarch progeny.

I should also say that these heights are based on armour contours - the Astartes is still the same size in Terminator armour as he is in power armour, but the suit itself is taller - the same goes for Primarchs.

Happyjew wrote:

endlesswaltz123 wrote:
The problems I imagine come from the fact you have a 300-500kg guy, who has the strength and power of a small tank, has the dick... Can you really imagine a space marine, a guy who has been purposely crafted into a human weapon being gentle?

Well....actually, thanks to SisterSydney, I kinda can.

That's actually a surprisingly good read - very well written

Studio actually says that a common range is 7' to 7'6" - the 7'6" is the top end and not the average.

And we have gaktons of equally canon or noncanon sources that contradict that.

Anyway, I have a hard time imagining that a Primarch in PA would not be taller than a Terminator. The bigger things get downscaled models, and even then, the Primarch models are colossal.

 CthuluIsSpy wrote:

 Psienesis wrote:

endlesswaltz123 wrote:
Considering the pure physical size of marines (and I'm not even guessing or talking about the size of certain organs in that region) I can't actually imagine it being a pleasant experience for women anyway, it may actually leave them incapable of bearing children....

Space Marines are 7'6" on average. That's not outside the realm of human possibility, as there are plenty of modern-day basketball players that near that height, if not match it. There's nothing magical about the height that makes your Little Marine suddenly incompatible with human anatomy.

Let's be honest, your dick isn't going to be bigger than a human child.

When you say that, do you mean that the space marine's phallus would not be as large as a whole human child, or his phallus would not be as large as that of a human child's?

I need clarification for academic reasons.

Not as large as an entire human child.

 BrotherHaraldus wrote:
And we have gaktons of equally canon or noncanon sources that contradict that.

Anyway, I have a hard time imagining that a Primarch in PA would not be taller than a Terminator. The bigger things get downscaled models, and even then, the Primarch models are colossal.

Primarch's are of a different size then standard space marines.

The Cypher Dataslate mentions Cypher precipitating the capture of a Fallen DA warlord that had a harem of women? So, it must then possible that a Space Marine can have sexual desire and enjoy sexual intercourse? In the Dataslate story, the Fallen warlord may have been corrupted by Chaos but I don't remember.

I'm sure Slaanesh can give you all kinds of things...

In fact, in a bit of research over the past weekend into the Emperor's Children, I came across some *really* disturbing images on DeviantArt (no duh, right?) about certain... ah... let's call them "gifts" from Chaos.

 Psienesis wrote:

 CthuluIsSpy wrote:

 Psienesis wrote:

endlesswaltz123 wrote:
Considering the pure physical size of marines (and I'm not even guessing or talking about the size of certain organs in that region) I can't actually imagine it being a pleasant experience for women anyway, it may actually leave them incapable of bearing children....

Space Marines are 7'6" on average. That's not outside the realm of human possibility, as there are plenty of modern-day basketball players that near that height, if not match it. There's nothing magical about the height that makes your Little Marine suddenly incompatible with human anatomy.

Let's be honest, your dick isn't going to be bigger than a human child.

When you say that, do you mean that the space marine's phallus would not be as large as a whole human child, or his phallus would not be as large as that of a human child's?

I need clarification for academic reasons.

Not as large as an entire human child.

You're still managing to miss the point entirely, in that the size of the dick may not be the problem, it would be the engine behind it. And, babies come out of a vagina, they don't go into it, and to come out of said vagina, takes a lot of hours of dilating, totally different to the process of having sex.

 ZebioLizard2 wrote:


Primarch's are of a different size then standard space marines.

Exactly. I was responding to

 Warpig1815 wrote:

Astartes in Terminator Armour: 8ft
Primarch in Power Armour: 8ft

and pointing out that a Primarch in PA would certainly be much taller than a Termie.

 Psienesis wrote:
I'm sure Slaanesh can give you all kinds of things...

In fact, in a bit of research over the past weekend into the Emperor's Children, I came across some *really* disturbing images on DeviantArt (no duh, right?) about certain... ah... let's call them "gifts" from Chaos.

Deviantart is becoming a scary place that is growing a more apt description of the site's name. I've seen the stuff you've probably seen. Some of it's meh, others are simply quite weird. This wonderful thing is probably worth all the eye-scarring images.



Also, another misconception I hate, Slaanesh cultists are sex-crazed tail-chasing addicts. No. While some do indeed pursue that path, Slaanesh is simply perfection in all forms, be it swordsmanship or gluttony. Pleasure isn't remotely exclusive to sex, it's simply a chemical reaction in the brain resulting from anything it deems as an extremely positive sensations, which if you're a die-hard perfectionist painter, would result from finishing your Magnum Opus (although Slaanesh demands every work you produce be your Magnum Opus, each one topping the latter). Sure the "I DO COCAINE" jokes of Noise Marines are fun, but it undermines the end result of Slaaneshi corruption. Completely sacrificing ALL of your humanity in exchange for endless pleasure, fully abandoning your species. More-so than any other Chaos God, Slaanesh takes everything and leaves a pleasure-seeking junky constantly searching for all forms of happiness to fill the hollow feeling inside.

to build on the above post here are some examples on people who might fall to slaneesh.
A scholar with really bad writers block might be driven to beg the heavens for an idea *cue slaneesh*
A planetary governour who has gone all dick-tator on his people and wants more power might prey for more power *cue slaneesh*
a gladiator who has never lost a fight, lays beaten in the dirt, a blade plunging to his neck. so obsessed is he with his own image, that he does not fear his own death, but rather the death of his fame. *cue slannesh*.

Shrouded, I'm not sure if that was clever or just a mistake...