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Made in au
Incorporating Wet-Blending




Sydney

Jesus christ this is upsetting
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

We have the technology.

The project is based on second chances. After my work on that Aquila, this is a light break.



[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in us
Grim Dark Angels Interrogator-Chaplain






A Protoss colony world

Someone should call the Society for Prevention of Cruelty to Plastic for some of those poor marines. I mean, I've seen some sloppy paint jobs where it was obvious the owner didn't thin his paints adequately, but this stuff...

My armies (re-counted and updated on 11/7/24, including modeled wargear options):
Dark Angels: ~16000 Astra Militarum: ~1200 | Imperial Knights: ~2300 | Leagues of Votann: ~1300 | Tyranids: ~3400 | Stormcast Eternals: ~5000 | Kruleboyz: ~3500 | Lumineth Realm-Lords: ~700
Check out my P&M Blogs: ZergSmasher's P&M Blog | Imperial Knights blog | Board Games blog | Total models painted in 2024: 40 | Total models painted in 2025: 25 | Current main painting project: Tomb Kings
 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
You need your bumps felt. With a patented, Grotsnik Corp Bump Feelerer 9,000.
The Grotsnik Corp Bump Feelerer 9,000. It only looks like several bricks crudely gaffer taped to a cricket bat.
Grotsnik Corp. Sorry, No Refunds.
 
   
Made in us
Scuttling Genestealer






Welp, now I don't feel so bad about my own crummly painted figs.

But man, what was even going thru the original person's head at the time? Buying a metal mini and removing just about everything that made the mini worth getting... coating a mini so much it's got to be more paint than plastic, then on top of that somehow managing to make the grass look like tinsel...
It's scary when the primary colors green-blob-for-a-face is the best of the bunch.

   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

I've lost the figure but I do have one that the owner lost the head for. So they just put flesh coloured paint and green (hair colour) on the stump.
It looked no less ridiculous than the rest of the figures.

I present to you: Questionably posed ultramarines, and the people who love them:




That's it for this topic and these dudes, because it'll ruin the impact of the actual project if I give up all the goodies right now. :p


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in kr
Arch Magos w/ 4 Meg of RAM





Republic of Ireland

Pretty sure that some of them may have been very young kids picking up brush and fig for the first time tp paint along with Mummy or Daddy.

   
Made in gb
Pious Palatine






Ooo exciting new project, I do enjoy a good refurbishment.

EDC
   
Made in au
Incorporating Wet-Blending




Sydney

Absolutely. I never used to thin my paint and thought that my painting was excellent. I'm fortunate enough to have thrown them out so i cannot see them now
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

 Januine wrote:
Pretty sure that some of them may have been very young kids picking up brush and fig for the first time tp paint along with Mummy or Daddy.

The ones I'm posting are purely the inexplicably funny ones.
There are some that are clearly parent and child projects that I'm not ripping on. One has beautiful edge highlighting and then the kid painted the rest. Another has a freehand banner that was clearly pencilled in by Ma or Pa and then the kid did the painting.

I'm just here to have a chuckle because we all remember doing this, not to be an ass to kids.


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in au
Incorporating Wet-Blending




Sydney

I've got kids. Rip all you want, they're jerks 90% of the time
   
Made in se
Ancient Space Wolves Venerable Dreadnought






I... actually don't know. Help?



kill... me...

Good luck, Buttery. You'll need it.

To Valhall! ~2800 points

Tutorials: Wet Palette | Painting Station
 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

The eyeball makes it 99% funnier.

I can't ID what that even was, now its cleaned.

There's a happy ending to this. Stay tuned.


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in nl
Aspirant Tech-Adept






 Matthew wrote:


kill... me...

Good luck, Buttery. You'll need it.


It looks like it has been risen from the dead...

How does one even clean that black Marine there is just so much paint on it. Some of them just look absolutely destroyed, but I'm not sure because of all the pain (edit: It's supposed to be paint but I typoed it, but pain is kinda fitting to.) on top of it.

I can hear the thousand cries of models being mullered like that.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/02/01 10:58:27


Poor ignorant guardsmen, it be but one of many of the great miracles of the Emperor! The Emperor is magic, like Harry Potter, but more magic! A most real and true SPACE WIZARD! And for the last time... I'm not a space plumber.

1K Vostroyan Firstborn
2K Flylords
600 Pts Orks
3K Ad-Mech 
   
Made in se
Longtime Dakkanaut






It's like you've bought a whole bunch of Veteran Trooper Smik

   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

Only one that I couldn't save thus far was this one.


Dude had no hands, only epoxy.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/02/01 11:52:09



[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in gb
Grisly Ghost Ark Driver






Nevelon wrote:365? Marine a day?


I struggled to do 5 in a month, if it is this, that will be truly epic.

Buttery Commissar wrote:
 Tactical_Spam wrote:
I bet if you bite one it will have jelly filling. That glossy paint is really the candy shell of some exotic Space Marine candy.
I just imagine these backpacks make wet farting noises if I'm honest.


Nearly lost my coffee out through my nose after reading this

Buttery Commissar wrote:
 Januine wrote:
I could identify at least what the orignal fig was.....right up unitl that last one.....w..t...f?

I had to strip it to find out.

It's this guy in metal with all his Admech symbols ground off.

He's also missing all of his servo arms.


Whyyyyyyy??????

kb_lock wrote:Jesus christ this is upsetting


Yep!

Buttery Commissar wrote:
 Januine wrote:
Pretty sure that some of them may have been very young kids picking up brush and fig for the first time tp paint along with Mummy or Daddy.

The ones I'm posting are purely the inexplicably funny ones.
There are some that are clearly parent and child projects that I'm not ripping on. One has beautiful edge highlighting and then the kid painted the rest. Another has a freehand banner that was clearly pencilled in by Ma or Pa and then the kid did the painting.

I'm just here to have a chuckle because we all remember doing this, not to be an ass to kids.


I'm pretty sure people know you well enough to know you're not an arse BC. I agree it is funny to look back at where we all started. But remember kids, (read this next bit with a "Dad voice" in your head), if you are starting off painting like this now, don't despair. Be proud you've taken the first step. Soon you will produce minis like BC and everyone else on here that wow you! (public service announcement ends )

Buttery Commissar wrote:Only one that I couldn't save thus far was this one.


Dude had no hands, only epoxy.


His Apothecary needs to go and get himself checked

BC, gotta tell you, this project has me very very interested and excited to see what your grand plan is. Don't keep us waiting too long

GW - 670 pts || - 354 pts || - 46 pts || - 106 pts || LoTR - 400 pts (Evil) vs 0 pts (Good) || Space Hulk - 1/35 || Deathwatch Overkill - 0/50
Other MEdge: Karists - 23 points || Epirians - 0 points Shattered Earth: Awaiting delivery "Awakening" Terrain: Awaiting delivery DWMG2: 4/54
My Miniatures blog || My Terrain blog || My MEdge blog || Paradigm's Painting Challenge League Tables: 2015/16, 2016/17

The Hobby Mission: 25/713 minis complete, 98/406 terrain complete. 46 more minis in 2016 to complete my goal for this year
jreilly89: "In the far future, there are only drive-bys."
 
   
Made in us
The Marine Standing Behind Marneus Calgar





Upstate, New York

 Buttery Commissar wrote:
Only one that I couldn't save thus far was this one.


Dude had no hands, only epoxy.


Early onset obliterator virus?

(kinda fuzzy on my chaos fluff these days. Oblits are some strange virus that merges the guys with the guns, yes?)

Also, that bolter looks like it’s made of bacon. That or I need to do something about breakfast...

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/02/01 13:50:46


   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

One a day, in theory. I'm quite likely going to preshade them by airbrush and have them ready.
Depends how many sponsors I get, honestly.

You know what, I'm going to go and find the first model I ever painted while I'm here, and you can marvel at it.


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in us
Lone Wolf Sentinel Pilot






The first model we ever painted-- That would make for an entertaining, yet cringeworthy thread all on its own.

Revel in the glory of the site's greatest thread or be edetid and baned!
 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
Every trip to the FLGS is a rollercoaster of lust and shame.

DQ:90S++G+M+B++I+Pw40k13#+D+A++/sWD331R++T(S)DM+ 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

Planes are green, right? Apparently as a twelve year old this made perfect sense.
[Thumb - image.jpg]



[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

It's growing on me.
My first ever mini was the warg on page 1.

I popped into the hobby and started around the same level I'm at now, which is depressing.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Misremembered. It's here: http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/647316.page
[Thumb - image.jpg]

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/02/01 14:46:25



[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in gb
Is 'Eavy Metal Calling?





UK

 Buttery Commissar wrote:
I've lost the figure but I do have one that the owner lost the head for. So they just put flesh coloured paint and green (hair colour) on the stump.
It looked no less ridiculous than the rest of the figures.

I present to you: Questionably posed ultramarines, and the people who love them:
Spoiler:




That's it for this topic and these dudes, because it'll ruin the impact of the actual project if I give up all the goodies right now. :p


I was about to point out that the first row were all-right is, could look good with decent painting...

And then I scrolled down. I'm not sure whether I'm more scarred by Sergeant Faceplant McHeadbutt or Arm Fall Off Marine...

And that Techmarine... why did you have to point out the eyeball? Why?

 
   
Made in gb
Grisly Ghost Ark Driver






BC, your first mini is better than mine:
http://images.dakkadakka.com/gallery/2015/2/20/688569_sm-Terrible%20early%20painted%20figures.jpg

I have no idea where my first kit is, but it was also a plane. Ah! Back in the day!

GW - 670 pts || - 354 pts || - 46 pts || - 106 pts || LoTR - 400 pts (Evil) vs 0 pts (Good) || Space Hulk - 1/35 || Deathwatch Overkill - 0/50
Other MEdge: Karists - 23 points || Epirians - 0 points Shattered Earth: Awaiting delivery "Awakening" Terrain: Awaiting delivery DWMG2: 4/54
My Miniatures blog || My Terrain blog || My MEdge blog || Paradigm's Painting Challenge League Tables: 2015/16, 2016/17

The Hobby Mission: 25/713 minis complete, 98/406 terrain complete. 46 more minis in 2016 to complete my goal for this year
jreilly89: "In the far future, there are only drive-bys."
 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

I think the vast majority of the SM are those very models!


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in gb
Grisly Ghost Ark Driver






Yeah I know. No one loves the old 2nd ed boys so I often see them in batch lots I've even used mine as parts for Deathwatch, but I might chuck one in to the next Tactical squad I do

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/02/01 17:08:03


GW - 670 pts || - 354 pts || - 46 pts || - 106 pts || LoTR - 400 pts (Evil) vs 0 pts (Good) || Space Hulk - 1/35 || Deathwatch Overkill - 0/50
Other MEdge: Karists - 23 points || Epirians - 0 points Shattered Earth: Awaiting delivery "Awakening" Terrain: Awaiting delivery DWMG2: 4/54
My Miniatures blog || My Terrain blog || My MEdge blog || Paradigm's Painting Challenge League Tables: 2015/16, 2016/17

The Hobby Mission: 25/713 minis complete, 98/406 terrain complete. 46 more minis in 2016 to complete my goal for this year
jreilly89: "In the far future, there are only drive-bys."
 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

I found a solid red tac under all that paint on one. Old stuff!


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in us
Never Forget Isstvan!





Chicago

 Januine wrote:
That....That's......HERESY!!!!! CogGod is not a happy deity now!


You must hate my dark mechanicus then

My first model was also pretty terrible (this was from about 2/3 years ago)

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/02/01 18:34:10


Ustrello paints- 30k, 40k multiple armies
http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/614742.page 
   
Made in us
Mysterious Techpriest






Exalted for "CogGod"!
Yea this is some crazy shizzle!
   
Made in us
Lone Wolf Sentinel Pilot








We can rebuild him.

We have the technology.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/02/02 16:13:17


Revel in the glory of the site's greatest thread or be edetid and baned!
 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
Every trip to the FLGS is a rollercoaster of lust and shame.

DQ:90S++G+M+B++I+Pw40k13#+D+A++/sWD331R++T(S)DM+ 
   
Made in us
Rogue Inquisitor with Xenos Bodyguards





Eastern edge

That is some ugly messes to clean before you get to the detail to paint it right Buttery!

"Your mumblings are awakening the sleeping Dragon, be wary when meddling the affairs of Dragons, for thou art tasty and go good with either ketchup or chocolate. "
Dragons fear nothing, if it acts up, we breath magic fire that turns them into marshmallow peeps. We leaguers only cry rivets!



 
   
 
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