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I'd suggest avoid everything that involves Michael Bay or Nicholas Cage. Also anything with Jim Carrey that was released after Eternal sunshine of a spotless mind.
The wicker man remake is probably the worst remake in history and the original movies was an absolute gem.
I saw The Fountain shortly after it came out in 2006. The trailer was incredibly deceptive. It appears to be a movie about a conquistador discovering the fountain of youth, and subsequently living forever.
This is bar none one of the worst movie experiences of my life. My wife and I had just gotten engaged and I had quit my job and moved to where she lived and started a new one. Around that time her brother passed away after a hard fight with a brain tumor. Shortly into the new job we took a department outing to see... The Fountain and not knowing what it was about I was just a shell trying not to crumble in the middle of my new team. It was easily one of the most torturous things I've ever felt forced to sit through.
This is actually pretty much what happened with me and First Man. The difference is, First Man is an objectively good movie - I'm not going to dispute that. But it turns out I don't really know that much about Neil Armstrong. I'm going to spoiler this next part even though these are public facts about a man famous for something that happened before I was born...
Spoiler:
because the thrust of the movie wasn't actually about the moon landing. I mean, it was, obviously. But the space race, the moon landing - these are almost a backdrop to the real story, which is about a man driven by grief. He's so driven by grief that is so all-consuming he wants to get off the damn planet.
Turns out Neil Armstrong had a young daughter who died of a brain tumor. All throughout the movie, there are flashbacks to Karen Armstrong, the little blonde girl who so closely resembled my wife's daughter, who also died young. We hadn't watched any trailers for the movie because I heard it was good, so we planned to see it, and maybe it wasn't even touched on in the trailers, but long story short we spent about 2 hours with my wife crying on and off quietly next to me (and refusing to leave every time I asked if she wanted to).
I definitely wish I had known that before we had gone to it - I try pretty hard to avoid movies that I suspect are going to press her buttons but I walked blindly into this one.
What you touch upon in your spoiler about wanting to avoid being "triggered" for a lack of a better term is a reason I don't watch pretty much ANY movie set in the Middle East, and REALLY wish I would have been prevented from Stop Loss and The Hurt Locker.
all the new treks, all the new wars, ok rogue one was ace, and the new jurassic world movies, basically if its a remake of an old franchise avoid it like you would avoid movie tie in games.
I'd say The Predator would top my list currently - as a warning for friends and family. This wasn't "eh, didn't live up to the original", this was two hours of my brother and I sitting on the couch rolling our eyes and saying "What the feth?" constantly.
I would have genuinely been better off not seeing the movie - and that's saying something, in a world of movies which rate at "popcorn level" or just below. If you thought Prometheus and ALIEN Covenant were disappointing...strap the hell in, because those just became fething Oscar contenders compared to this hack-job pile of gak.
Elbows wrote: I'd say The Predator would top my list currently - as a warning for friends and family. This wasn't "eh, didn't live up to the original", this was two hours of my brother and I sitting on the couch rolling our eyes and saying "What the feth?" constantly.
I would have genuinely been better off not seeing the movie - and that's saying something, in a world of movies which rate at "popcorn level" or just below. If you thought Prometheus and ALIEN Covenant were disappointing...strap the hell in, because those just became fething Oscar contenders compared to this hack-job pile of gak.
In short...do not see this movie.
It was bad... Like really bad.
From whom are unforgiven we bring the mercy of war.
I know the line was in the trailer and yet .. it still made the film for me ... the rest was as you say pretty meh.
Are you thinking of Skull Island? Because the one Chromedog is talking about is older, it came out in 2005. And I rather liked them both, honestly - Skull Island a bit more. Chromedog is definitely right that King Kong is a little too long, even if I did like it.
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Blackie wrote: I'd suggest avoid everything that involves Michael Bay or Nicholas Cage. Also anything with Jim Carrey that was released after Eternal sunshine of a spotless mind.
The wicker man remake is probably the worst remake in history and the original movies was an absolute gem.
Bay has been involved with some decent movies (A Quiet Place is one of them ironically).
and St Nicholas of Cage has a best actor Oscar under his belt (Leaving Las Vegas) and nominee for Adaptation. Man has some acting chops about him when he wants, but mostly he wants to get paid and enjoy himself. He's also one of the great overactors of all time
Blackie wrote: I'd suggest avoid everything that involves Michael Bay or Nicholas Cage.
and St Nicholas of Cage has a best actor Oscar under his belt (Leaving Las Vegas) and nominee for Adaptation. Man has some acting chops about him when he wants, but mostly he wants to get paid and enjoy himself. He's also one of the great overactors of all time
One of the only times I left a movie theater feeling like I'd truly wasted my time and money. Much more so than even The Last Jedi. The movie took a dump on the Alien franchise if you ask me. It's the reason I have never bothered to watch Alien: Covenant.
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One of the only times I left a movie theater feeling like I'd truly wasted my time and money. Much more so than even The Last Jedi. The movie took a dump on the Alien franchise if you ask me. It's the reason I have never bothered to watch Alien: Covenant.
In all honesty I found Covenant to be worse. Prometheus at least felt fresh and had some interesting ideas. Covenant backtracks to just being a horror flick but unlike the original alien they make a point to show the creatures as much as possible...and the CGI does not look good. And that is just the more superficial of the movies problems. If you didn't like Prometheus then just stay away from Covenant cause eh...i'm at the point where I hope they just let the franchise die.
I didn't see covenant. I thought that Prometheus was flawed but set up a decent sequel. The idea of humanity being created, and in turn creating david, then confronting humanities creators could have! dad to some deep thoughts on creators and their creations, can they coexist?
It might have been nice to see shaw confront the engineers and demand an explanation. Likewise shaw could have realized david was a creation and deserved as much respect as humanity wanted from its creators. Can a created being and it's creators coexist?
Yeah, some nice ideas there that covenant could have explored.
So instead we get david going "KILL ALL HUMANS! MUST KILL ALL HUMANS! "
(Word orks would not know or use due to their reproductive mechanics)
Lance845 wrote: Promethius and Covenant both ruin the entire time line of the alien movies. Not AVP mind you, just the alien movies.
That being said I enjoyed Covenant much more. And the Xenomorph at the end is the best moving alien we have ever had.
Not only that but the technology was way off. Alien and Aliens had more practical CRT and retro 70s tech mixed with industrial. In the newer movies they've got holograms and much more high tech stuff. I'd say Alien Isolation a friggin video game did a better job of expanding the alien universe in a way that makes sense than the newer RIdley Scott films. I think Ridley has lost his mind though, after all he told Denis to rewrite BR2049s sea wall scene "because water is dangerous and you shouldn’t shoot with water". Good thing Denis didn't listen and was confident in his own ideas.
The more advanced tech COULD be explained by a science vessel on the bleeding edge vs a commercial towing rig (essentially the crew of the Nostromo are just truckers in space).
BUT, by the end of Covenant David is on a human colony ship with embryos that are not yet perfected xenomorphs (but close) heading for a new planet and not at all near any promethian ships. That movie takes place about 100 years before Alien and they have over 30 years before they reach their destination planet.
So... in about 70 years, David needs to perfect the xenomorph, find another promethian ship, get the space jockey pilot infected, fill that fether with eggs in a storage area, have it crash on LV-426 and have it sit there for so long that the space jockey fossilizes and fuses with his chair.
Lets remember everybody, a promethians head inside it's helmet stayed perfectly preserved including having fluids in Promethus. These fethers take forever to fossilize.
These are my opinions. This is how I feel. Others may feel differently. This needs to be stated for some reason.
The thing is I was hoping the engineers in prometheus modeled their suits to look like an alien species even superior to them. Which would have been the true space jockey which is huge one the original ship from alien. Thing is they took the less gigeresque path of it just being a somewhat lame suit. It borderline ruins the whole sense of wonder I felt when I watched the original Alien and saw the space jockey. Sometimes the unknown and the unanswered is much more fascinating than having all the answers. As of this moment i'm kind of feeling the urge to just wave my hands and say prometheus and alien covenant are non canon. Or at least refuse to acknowledge them as being so.
Consider the difference in bodies left in a desert, peat bog, up the Andes, in a river and just out on the street, and how they decay differently
Yeah, when exposed to the elements.
A body inside a sealed crypt decays differently still. And a body inside a space ship, a vessel expressly built for keeping the outside outside isnt going to give a gak what lv 426s atmosphere is like.
These are my opinions. This is how I feel. Others may feel differently. This needs to be stated for some reason.
Mortal Engines, omg what a pile of gak. I saw it last night and I think it ranks even lower than The Predator did for me which is saying a lot. Some of the visuals were interesting but the story and characters are just terrible. It reminded me of pretty much everything that was needlessly wrong with the Hobbit.
Thankfully it was a half price show that my brother paid for, but even then I still feel a bit cheated.
+1 for I Saw The Devil. Checked it out so I'd be the one reading subtitles for a change instead of the gf, we were both over it well before this tracker scene you're talking about, thankfully. Was a stark contrast to the two previous KR films we'd watched, A Taxi Driver and Train To Busan were both quite good.
I'd also add A Serbian Film. Zero redeeming qualities, essentially one of the most horrendous snuff films ever made.
Lance845 wrote: The more advanced tech COULD be explained by a science vessel on the bleeding edge vs a commercial towing rig (essentially the crew of the Nostromo are just truckers in space).
BUT, by the end of Covenant David is on a human colony ship with embryos that are not yet perfected xenomorphs (but close) heading for a new planet and not at all near any promethian ships. That movie takes place about 100 years before Alien and they have over 30 years before they reach their destination planet.
So... in about 70 years, David needs to perfect the xenomorph, find another promethian ship, get the space jockey pilot infected, fill that fether with eggs in a storage area, have it crash on LV-426 and have it sit there for so long that the space jockey fossilizes and fuses with his chair.
Lets remember everybody, a promethians head inside it's helmet stayed perfectly preserved including having fluids in Promethus. These fethers take forever to fossilize.
The fact the movies were made like 35 years apart is a better explanation for the looks of the nonstromo and prometheus.
"I learned the hard way that if you take a stand on any issue, no matter how insignificant, people will line up around the block to kick your ass over it." Jesse "the mind" Ventura.
Lance845 wrote: Promethius and Covenant both ruin the entire time line of the alien movies. Not AVP mind you, just the alien movies.
That being said I enjoyed Covenant much more. And the Xenomorph at the end is the best moving alien we have ever had.
Covenant is good fun - David is again the best thing in it - but we don;t have to suffer the idiocy of Dr Shaw - urghh she is just so annoying in Promethius.
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~700
5000 
