its self explanatory really

1: whistle at a sob
2:then tell here her but looks big in that armor

Do any of the things mentioned in my sig

As an imperial citizen suggest that the imperium reform its hardline polices towards other cultures and be opened minded about the validity of xeno philosophy.

(24) Dress up as a chaos marine for a fancy dress party over at the Commissioners house

(25) Dress up as a chaos marine for any reason

streaking around any of Slaanesh's followers...

At the battlefield of a large Ork battle, pick mushrooms for at least ten years after.

Ask Commisar Yarrick to shake hands.

Ask Pedro Kantor about the ol' homestead.

NOT satisfy a SOB if you get all the way to home plate.

Tell Ghazkull Thraka you think his tactics are overrated.

Hold a funeral service for a Necron.

Tell the Hello Kitty Space Marine chapter that they suck. (They are still SM after all)

Let a Mek loot a battalion of Whirlwinds (unless your trying to end a WAAAGH!!!). "Don't press dat!?!?"

Point at the Eldar's private parts and giggle.

Talk to the wrong Ork clan about trading goods.

Plant flowers outside a CSM chapter.

Tickle an Ork, Necron, Dark Elder, SOB or Tyranid. A follower of Slaanish is okay though.

Go to your friend's Slaanish "fun" party.

Try to "mate" two Stompas.

Doodle in magic marker a mexican culey cue 'stash on the Emperor.

Start any converesation with an SoB with ' I'm going to simplify things by talking to your breasts directly. It'll be better that way. '
Then telling the aforementioned SoB that you'd like a ham sammich.
And, if by some act of intervention by the Emperor you are still alive, a playful squeeze with 'ahoogah!' Sounds is strictly advised against.

Share a cup with anyone bearing the mark of Nurgle.

Give a kitten to anyone bearing the mark of Khorne.

Ingest anything given to you buy a follower of Slaanesh.

Refer to the God Emperor of mankind as 'that jerk on the magic toilet' around the Black Templars.

Or that feisty SoB. But asking her 'who's your Emperor' while getting freaky with her is acceptable.

Giving an Etherial a copy of the Communist Manifesto, probably on this list.

So is riding on a DE Ravager. Those things are death traps.

In certain company, misuse of the terms 'Ork' and 'grot' can be disasterous.

Engage in theological debate whatsoever.

Going into battle against CSM with the keys to the Golden Throne Room and dropping/losing them.

Patting/slapping the butt of a SoB as a sign of encouragement.

Calling a Chaos lord or a Ork warboss a chicken.

Keeping a Tyranid as a pet.

Using a drop pod to diliver pizza.

Unplugging the life support system to the Emperor.

Going up to CSM and saying "Lets be friends" and hug them while handing out flowers.

Telling a SOB to go back to the kitchen.

Charge Death Guard CSM.

halonachos wrote:Telling a SOB to go back to the kitchen.

If I was married to a Sister of Battle, the Kitchen wouldn't be the place I'd tell her to go

(insert number here) Bring a demonette home to meet the family, tell them this is your new spouse, and especially if your uncle happens to be a commisioner





EDIT: I apologise for only having filth on my mind

When in the field forgetting to switch off the power fist and then wiping your ass with the fist.

You'd rip yourself a new one.

Ask the cute girl with the third purple arm to dance....

You may not like the offspring...errr outcome.

(Got to be an old schooler to understand this one.)

1:challenge to see if a space marine can spit on you dead center

garret wrote:1:challenge to see if a space marine can spit on you dead center

that would end painfully ><

Challenge a Khorne Berzerker to a game of Scrabble.

Play Twister at a Slaanesh Cultists Party

Hug a plague marine.
Make fun of a beserker's helmet.

Never ever buy housing plots on the planet of Armageddon because Ghazghkull is not a nice nieghbour.

Buy a second-hand truck from an Ork

Stand next to the Commissar and say "maybe we could just ASK if they wanna be friends!" at the beginning of a CSM charge

TP a dreadnaught, even if he is a jerk.

Challenge a SM to an arm wrestle (and actually mean it).

Ask a SM if they have any...um... let's just say "reproductive organs".

Drinking Fenresian Ale (if you're human you're dead! )

Merry a SOB.

Having a debate with a DE Warrior.

Moving to a new house in an area where some DE live.

kiss a genestealer
kiss a canifex
taunt a space marine captain

Point out to Abaddon that Chaos Space Marines aren't as killy as they used to be.

Date an inquisitor's daughter. (I declare thee diobolis!)

Try to win a game of chess against Tzeentch.

Say the words "What's the worst that could happen?" It will always MAKE IT WORSE.

Use a space marine's purity seal as TP when in the field.

Light a firecracker in vicinity of IG troops. It may cause a massive rout and widespread panic.

Use a Grey Knight's incinerator to light a cig.

Although using the incinerator to burn an enemy alive, and using his flaming corpse to light said cigarette is permissible.

Dare a space marine to a breath-holding contest.

Try to high-five a space marine wielding a power fist.

Try to moon Sgt. Telion. (Hole in one!)

Attempt to play fetch with a son of Russ.

Use another IG as cover, seriously, the bullets go right through him as well so how do you think its going to help you.

Rangerrob wrote:Ask the cute girl with the third purple arm to dance....

You may not like the offspring...errr outcome.

(Got to be an old schooler to understand this one.)

Tell Chaplain Cassius that you "danced" with said 3rd armed girl.

Attempt to scratch a Carnifex's tummy.

Attempt to scratch a Squiggoth's tummy.

Try to take a Ripper home and keep it as a pet.

Try to punch a hole in a Thousand Son's armor.

come as an arbitrator to a hive world gang party.

Power Fist a Sister of Battle

Dreadwinter wrote:Power Fist a Sister of Battle

Unless you plan on marrying her first.

Challenge a Tau Fire Warrior to a Sniper Duel

Call a Crisis Suit " That Gundam thingy"

Moon a Hammerhead

Ask a Terminator if he'll be back

Speak to a Terminator in a Ahnold voice

stick your finger down the bolter thinking it will stop it
high five with a power fist on

piss off a commissar
fart into the speaking tubes in a stompa while the warboss has his face next to it
be a Pacifist ork

Whoa, I feel like I entered a time warp! Guess I shoulda numbered them.

dieing from a grot, i mean seriously... cmon, a grot.

You definitely should not -Transmission Censored by Order of Inquisiton- , that is guaranteed to cause some trouble.

Fire warriors doing a for the Greater Good Charge into a Bio Titan

Saying this is not a Good Idea with a Commisar in the vicinity

Being a Commisar with a Catachan in the vicinity

Arthas367 wrote:Fire warriors doing a for the Greater Good Charge into a Bio Titan

guilty. except it was a 'fex.

Try to cheer up Marbo
Volunteer for Penal Legion
Join the Imperial Guard
Expect a new DE codex.

Install pornography into your SM Helmet.

Attempt to be happy, joyous, or optimistic

Walk into to a room full of grey knights and starting "Give those astartes with the horns a break ok, they done nothing wrong, not like they killed the emporer or something!"

Visit Commorragh on a holiday trip.
Ask the Chaos Gods for a favour.
Stay near a Slaneshi Marine when he says he 'needs the toilet'.
Use a lasgun when you could have a bolter.

Ask Yarrik to grab the cuddly toy with his Claw.

In all defense to imperial guardsmen who use lasguns not bolters, a bolter would probaly shatter there rist.

Leave your Rhino's blinker on during a battle.

Ask a commissar what he thinks of xenos.
Replace flamers with super soakers.
Do a facepalm with a power fist.
Boxing with power fists.

Nofasse 'Eadhunta wrote:Leave your Rhino's blinker on during a battle.

Or your turn signal on a land raider.... hm.....

Ask kharn the betrayer for directions

Have a drinking contest with a Space Wolf.
Moon a Keeper of Secrets.
Use fireworks in the vicinity of a veteran IG regiment.
Play poker with a psyker.
Ask a Sister Repentia if you can borrow her Eviscerator to go logging...and then mention that the paper look realy suites her...

Decide that the Red Grail is a good place to relieve yourself.

Dress up as a cultist to an Inquisitor's Halloween party.

Challenge a Catachan to a game of hide-and-seek. He may have flashbacks to staging an ambush.

Call the Emperor's palace via collect call.

Use a thunder hammer to build a house.

Try to use a nercon for a toaster

Try to run over a necron with your rino... it won't work.

Trying to set a necron on fire

Any more ten comandments jokes?

thou Shalt Not:

1) See an Ultramarine and yell "Look out for Gargamel!"

2) Nuke the Site from Orbit, even if it is the only way to be sure. (Unless thou art an Inquisitor)

3) Ask Games Workshop to fix broken or nonsensical rules. Game Imbalance and Poor Design are Grim/Dark.

4) Ask why the exact same hull made of the exact same materials driven by the exact same crew has vastly differing armor values depending on what turret sits on top.

5) Modify thy GW models so that they do not look like the suck and then take them to a Tourney. The Envious will throw a hissy fit that guardsman 405 has a left buttcheek is not GW/FW.

Volunteer as an IG

(if snotling) follow up on 'Shock attack gun: staff needed' advertisement

Ask a commissar a question

Streak in pretty much any battlefield

Be an archiologist (necrons

Play with plasma guns

Ask a Sister of Battle for 'Tactical Advice'

Create threads like this.

Doubt the power of Sly Marbo.

Tell the Comissionar, that you really aren't in the mood to fight.

Call the charging Banshee a chick with a knife.

Try to play cards with a Farseer.

Use tank traps to stop Eldar

Tell an ork to use his manners.

aurelion wrote:

Use tank traps to stop Eldar

Yeah, I'm guilty of trying that. As you guess, it didn't work

aurelion wrote:Tell the Comissionar, that you really aren't in the mood to fight.

Call the charging Banshee a chick with a knife.

Try to play cards with a Farseer.

Use tank traps to stop Tau

alternate ending

The Watcher wrote:Give a kitten to anyone bearing the mark of Khorne.

But... but...

Ummmmm, okay?
How about never, EVER drawing stuff like that.
I don't know whether you'd get burnt for heresy or shot for incompetence and cowardice. But you'd definitely end up dead.

I seccond that motion nomatter how funny that was.
LOL

Tell a tech marine that his servo harness is outdated and tacky!

Complete the following ritual...

1. Insert the =I= DELETED BY INQUISITION =I= into your =I= DELETED BY INQUISITION =I= and swallow a whole =I= DELETED BY INQUISITION =I=
2. pour boiling milk onto gazelle's =I= DELETED BY INQUISITION =I= before using said milky gazelle to make a warming cup of =I= DELETED BY INQUISITION =I= flavour hot cocoa.
3. ????
4. BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!

Ask about the female space marines.

Tell Doomrider he doesn't know how to party.

Annoy the Battle Sisters during the Red Rage

I know what that Khorne Berzerker in the back is saying in the Kharn picture!

But you should never eat sphagetti, in a Land Raider.

Burritos, flower tortillas,fries, and NOS (to drink) all the way!

Tell a Blood Angel that only Chaos have wings.

Whisper to a loyalist marine that you know his chapters secret

Trust your ally

Throw anything with a high point value at Grots

Feed the Blood Thirster...

Question the Inquisitor about his Demon sword

Critize Asurmen's clothes.

Disagree with Gwar!

Piss off the Black Angry Marines.

Bet against Leman Russ in a javelin toss.

slice of toast wrote:Disagree with Gwar!

I support this mans Product and/or service!

Agree with Gwar.
(Trust me, experience has taught me that you'll be scarred for life)

-Ask a chaos sorceror if he does parties
-Use an army of fat Italian plumbers fight an army of Orks- SHROOMS!
-Drive up a mountain and into a warlord titan unless your name is Wazdakka
-Drive an orky vehicle
-Push the big red button on the titan

-Push the Big Red button full stop is a bad idea, regardless where you find it.

Piss into a carnivorous plant on Catachan.

They might piss back...

I'm sure theirs hurts alot more than yours does.

Walk into a tau gathering and shout, "HEY! We don't take kindly to the greater good 'round here...."

@Dashofpepper: They would probably ask you to leave...nicely. And then they would give you a brochure.

Challenge and Evil Suns orc Trukk driver to a game of 'Chicken'

Pillok-I don't think Orks understand the concept of 'chicken' just smashing into stuff and you.

Play Hide and Seek with Snikrot.

Shout 'For the Emperor' while next to Abaddon.

Tell Ghazghkull that he can't fight.

Ask for surgery from a Painboy.

Get angry at Zagstruk.

Call Zagstruk a chicken and laugh.

Commandeer a Warlord Titan when going against Wazdakka's Waaagh!

Play twister with a Chaos Spawn.

Play tig with Kharn the Betrayer.

Have Fabius Bile as your Doctor.

Use a Tankbusta Bomb as a Frisbee.

Riverdance with a Warlord Titan.

Ask Ahriman for a favour.

Handshake Grotsnik.

Play Scrabble with the C'tan.

Skateboard naked through Necron Tombs.

Duel Lucius The Eternal.

Call Typhus mouldy.

Call Saint Celestine 'a stuck up bitch'

Dress up as Horus when going to the Emperor's fancy dress birthday party.

Ask Nazdreg if you can see his gun in action.

Show off a new gun in a camp full of Lootas.

Ejaculate into a warp gate.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

Emperors Faithful wrote:

aurelion wrote:

Use tank traps to stop Eldar

Yeah, I'm guilty of trying that. As you guess, it didn't work

Yeah and Tau.

Go into the maelstrom or the eye of terror while still supporting the emperor .
Travel through the warp with no protection
Asking a commissar if he wants to turn to chaos
Playing on a battlefield
Buy a house on a Tyranid invasion route

It is okay to buy a house that resides in the 'Nids route, it is just a bad Idea to LIVE in it.
What about buying a house in the EYE of Terror?

Saying "how do you do" to a tau citizen while loyal to the emperor.

Try a buisness scam in the Warp.

Tell Khorne he's fat.

Challenge a Speed Freak to a drag race.

Tell Tzeench to make up his fething mind!

Tell nurgle to clean up his act or tell slannesh to think clean and wholesome and G rated thoughts.

Put Slaneesh in charge of production for a G rated kids show.

Uh try to pet a Herophant

Set a universe record by climbing a warlord Titan.(or the bigest kind)

Unplug the empror.

Going up to CSM and saying "Lets be friends" and hug them while handing out flowers.

Maintain eye contact.

Boarding a tyranid hive ship

Give the finger to Khorne and tell him he's a wimp and coward


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Tell nurgle he is not filthy enough


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Tell Slaanesh he is not perverted enough.
Tell Tzeenech he is not wise enough.
Feed a carnifex.

Give a genestealer a manicure.

Find out you just luanched an exterminatus on "the wrong planet".

Donate a carnifex to your local zoo.
Have a wrestling match with Khorne.
Make Slaanesh your babysitter.
Give Nurgle a bath.
Tell an inquistor that your GF is a howling banshee.

Donate a carnifex to a PETTING zoo.

OH GOD!!!!!!!!!!


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Donate your body parts to a hive fleet.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Tell an Iquisitor that your part of a genestealer cult.

Mention the word "cult" in the presence of an Inquisitor.

Paint your Valk flourescent pink when its on a recon mission.

Never do this
with an exitus rifle.(Skip to about 0:40)

?

Tell an Inquisitor that your neighbour is a cultist just so you can have an affair with his wife.

Attempt to lick the brand with 3 flies.

Ask a daemonette for a lap dance.
Walk into a Space Wolves drinking hall and yell "bottoms up ya bunch of wimps!!!"
Give Nurgle a gift basket of bath soaps.

Tell a DA that he looks fat in his dress. Ask a SW if he would like a dog biscuit

deadratman wrote:Ask a SW if he would like a dog biscuit

Note to self: Must do that some time. (failing that, ask the same of a SW supporter)

Yes I would like a dog biscuit.

Who's a good doggy?
Who's a goody goody doggy?
You're a goody goody doggy!
Here you go you cute wittle doggy. (give dog biscuit)

This again? Well, I'm not going to take this . . . and not also get a biscuit.

Furthermore, anyone else noticed how slow Dakka is the last coupla days?

This is what I think of you biscuit (Crush)

What's with all the Wolf hate lately?

Dakka has seemed slow, though everything seems kinda slow right now to me. I'm rather tired this week, not getting alot of sleep.

Not wolf hate. SPAZ PUPPEH LUV! Yaaaaaay!

Thing not to do; Taunt the SPESS PUPPEHZ, their bite is defiantly worse than their bark.

And thier fleas are definitely worse than thier bite.

Thats why the Emperor invented Flea collars.

Tell a SW that he is the emperor's lapdog.

ahahaha

Ruin a mural of the Emperor by painting a Moustache or a set of Male Genitals on His face.

BrotherStynier wrote:This is what I think of you biscuit (Crush)

What's with all the Wolf hate lately?

Dakka has seemed slow, though everything seems kinda slow right now to me. I'm rather tired this week, not getting alot of sleep.

SAME

Sorry person person.We wouldn;t actually do this. I have a great deal of respect for my fellow pups. But this thread is what not to do in the 40k universe. No one would atually do this lest they get thier head ripped off.Sorry if you got pissed off.

I was actually refering to the I'm tired and everything seems slow part of that statement and didn't notice there was a descent sized 5th page.

You shouldn't do that in 40k either.

use the firing tubes of an exorcist as a impromptu bogs before firing!!

Squint...Seriously, squiniting is GUARANTEED to get you in deep S*£@

Get an 8 pointed star tattooed on, wel, anywhere.

Talk about Hoursus as though he was your roommate in college.

let down Doomriders tyres

taunt the machine spirit of a land raider

Give money to a SOB and ask for Blow...

deadratman wrote:Give money to a SOB and ask for Blow...

Yell at a librarian or psyker

use Roboute Guillimans stasis tube to keep your field rations fresh

MMMmmm, smurf flavoured beef jerkey

Attempt to take down a Blood Angels company armed with a sharpened stick bottle of water and cries of
"take this foul beasts of darkness i am the mighty vampire hunter"

try to clamp Bjorn the fell handed and give hima parking ticket for not moving his damn vehicle

That 1st has been tried funnily enough. lol, somepuritan inquisitor tried it against the Flesh Tearers (sucessor chapter)

1. Say that the primarchs are overrated. Especially Sanguinius.
2. Ask a Khorne Berserker is he wants to go to therapy
3. Ask a SoB out to dinner...and attempt to get a BJ(excuse the filth)
4. Point and stare at an Eldar
5. Look at a tyranid and say,"What they hell is that?" before trying to kill it.

Invite a Dark Eldar to your birthday party.

Yeah, but what about if he brings his slave-girls with him?

barlio wrote:Yeah, but what about if he brings his slave-girls with him?

He could still be lying, never invite creepy people.

Thats why you invite Daemonettes.

Post on warseer.

barlio wrote:Yeah, but what about if he brings his slave-girls with him?

Dark Eldar and Birthday Parties.
1) Will insist on cutting the cake, cut it unevenly, and will give himself the biggest slice.
2) Will take the game of "Murder in the Dark" a little too literally.
3) Will help himself to YOUR birthday presents.
4) Those slave-girls he brought with him? a) They're not for you or b) You aren't entirely sure whether they're girls...

Ok I understand now. I won't send an invite then.

Good choice.

Don't worry, I'm sure there are still hookers in 40k.

Yeah, but what if it is a SoB in disguise, or even worse a feminine Slaneesh Overlord in drag?

Ask a salamander for a light

Go camping on Armageddon

Point out to Yarrick that the name of his baneblade was asking for trouble

Offer kibbles 'b bits to spacewolves

Ask SoB what exactly they used to do as 'brides of the emperor'

Challenge a dark eldar to a scavenger hunt

Nudge the emperor over to 'try' the golden throne

Answer a Dark Eldar's advert on Craigslist40K.

The Dragon wrote:
Point out to Yarrick that the name of his baneblade was asking for trouble

lol

Play chess with a farseer. (GA-REN-TEED to drive you insane)
Play chess with Tzeench. (GA-REN-TEED to spend 3.5 years cackling madly and grinning, then pull off a move that's checkmate on turn ONE.)

Play hide and seek with Karandras

Ask an aspiring sorceror if he could perform magic tricks at your kid's birthday; as for the DE at the birthday party, never ask if he could cut the cake.

1. Ask a commissar were to get the cool hats
2. Ask a slanesh demon out on a date
3. Ask a ork whos da boss
4. Go on a "abandoned" space hulk.
5. Tell a Sob to give you a happy ending.

Tell an ork he has bad aim. Tease Ahriman with magic tricks. Poke a plaguebearer. Moon a slaanesh anything. Mock Kharn. Call Abaddon, Abaddona. Sucker punch a commisar.

Join the army, cause you're gonna get killed.

Not join the army, cause you're gonna get killed, iwhout a chance to defend yourself.

Park your rhino in Calgars parking spot

Get promoted to Sergeant of the Devastator Squad.

Slash Kor'Sarro khans tires
Replace Kantors Power Fist with a novelty hand
Ask Tigurius if he knows whats going to happen next, then slap him
Put a "kick me" sign on a terminators back and see if he can get it off (which i doubt he could)
Ask Vulkan where he got that lovely cloak, "is it from topshop?"

Hand Papa Nurgle some disenfectant
Try to persaude Khorne using Feng Shui that the skulls would be better away from his throne.

Unplug the Golden Throne.

Thelaugher wrote:Unplug the Golden Throne.

No that's okay, but if you want to avoid electrocution, make sure you turn off the switch first.

Put the Emperor's body on wires like a marionette and have it dance robotically to fast-beat techno tunes.

That'll piss somebody off for sure.

Agree with Decius of the Pre-Heresy Death Guard that his opinion on the colour of Orkoid blood is Red... IT'S GREEN GODDAMIT!!!

let a sob go in a csm rhino

Play chicken with a Tank of any race... well eldar are okay

Play chicken with... any walker

play chicken against... a space marine

play chicken with... an avatar

grab at a sob butt

star at a sob, avatar, anybody

Be Sly Marbo's enemy.
Ask Sly Marbo for an autograph.
Buy flowers to a sob from the order of the bloody rose.
Paint the inside of Calgar's termie armour with superglue.
Destroy a machine in front of a Techpriest.
Scream 'Cripplefight!!!' when Cassius is fighting an Ork with Cybork body.

Put glue in a commissars hat when he has it off.
Use duck tape to stop the water caste.
Ask Fabius Bile where he got his PhD from.
Do not use windows Vista to run a necron army.

Ask a Fire warrior if anyone cares about the greater good.

Nailz94 wrote:Ejaculate into a warp gate.

I was eating a chocolate muffin and drinking milk when I read that. You owe me a new keyboard.

You git.

Try to play pin the tail on the Carnifex

Actually win in "pin the tail on the carnifex
@Death Tyrant: What is a git?

Git is an Ork word usually preceded by "stoopid"

(on topic) Play tag with World Eaters.

Ask Fabius Bile to give you some medicines.
Get caught by Dark Eldars or Emperors Children.
Actually, get caught by anything that is not on your side.
Paint your Space Marine Power Armour into black, add spikes and go in front of your mates (as Space Marine).
Ask Kharn to give you a piece of ham.
Ask "Can I get a new plasma gun, my old one exploded" from Techmarine/Techpriest.
Press the forbidden button in a Looted Wagon.

Ask a kroot if they think tau tastes nice
Ask Kharn the betrayer if he wants to join a peace rally
Pimp out an ork wagon aganist the mek's orders
do an impression of a commissar when he's looking at you

Never accept candy from Shadowbrand or any EC EVER!!!!!!!!

Ask where a Noise Marine's stash of coke is.
Go on a date with with a Dark Eldar.

dance naked on a rhino
install stripper poles into a land raider then invite sob into it

Play truth or dare with anything Slaaneshi
Attempt to give a 'stealer a manicure

Turn your back on a slaaneshi anything

Get it on with slaanesh.

replace the propellent in the artillery shells with sugar.

try on the kasarkin's helmet

try out the kasarkin's gun

get drunk in a leman russ with a commissar.

Anything having to do with an over caffeinated twitchy commissar.

Tell an Inquisitor that your a cultist.

Ask a SW if he'll be your dog at the race track.

hide kegs in your leman russ when a delicate battle is upcoming

ask the Sob if she'll stylize your hair

Ask for a transfer to a trench battle against nids

Try to play a hand portable video game in front of a commissar.

Run around the camp with the commissars hat/coat on

Ask tzeench if you can borrow a book from his library

Make fun of a terminator's big head

Take a medal away from an ogryn

Play eldar and shout taste the rainbow

tell a broadside he doesn't have enough firepower

tell a hive tyrant he's inadequate.

Make a list like this instead of doing your homework.

You're all wrong. The #1 thing you must never do in the 40k universe is exist. If you do, you're doomed.

penut the butter wrote:Turn your back on a slaaneshi anything

Cos if you do...

Fence with a death-cult assasin.

Try to keep a Daemonette as a pet.

Play hide and seek with Creed

Try to make Marbo be sociable

Tell Ortan Cassius that your pet named Ripper IS a ripper

Get 5 hippies and start protesting in front of Ortan Cassius' house and shout "All the Tyranids want is to be loved! Stop the massacre!"

You start singing "The Dread,the Dread, the Dread is on fire!" when you see a dreadnought explode.

wuestenfux wrote:Try to keep a Daemonette as a pet.

Cos if you DO

LOL!

Rangerrob wrote:Ask the cute girl with the third purple arm to dance....

You may not like the offspring...errr outcome.

(Got to be an old schooler to understand this one.)

Why not ask her to dance. She and her "cute" little sister with the big head and hypnotic eyes may want to take you back to their place and "initiate" you. Just don't ask what an ovipositor is... you'll find out soon enough...

A Lictor... BLOR!!! wrote:

Rangerrob wrote:Ask the cute girl with the third purple arm to dance....

You may not like the offspring...errr outcome.

(Got to be an old schooler to understand this one.)

Why not ask her to dance. She and her "cute" little sister with the big head and hypnotic eyes may want to take you back to their place and "initiate" you. Just don't ask what an ovipositor is... you'll find out soon enough...

A Lictor... BLOR!!! wrote:

Rangerrob wrote:Ask the cute girl with the third purple arm to dance....

You may not like the offspring...errr outcome.

(Got to be an old schooler to understand this one.)

Why not ask her to dance. She and her "cute" little sister with the big head and hypnotic eyes may want to take you back to their place and "initiate" you. Just don't ask what an ovipositor is... you'll find out soon enough...

Emperors Faithful wrote:

wuestenfux wrote:Try to keep a Daemonette as a pet.

Cos if you DO

Emperors Faithful wrote:

penut the butter wrote:Turn your back on a slaaneshi anything

Cos if you do...

Isn't anyone getting the message?

Get some Sisters of Battle as slaves.

wuestenfux wrote:Get some Sisters of Battle as slaves.

Get into Politics (because the inquisition will kill you)

Don't get into politics (because the politicians will work you to death)

Play chess with CREEEEEEED!!! Even if you're a Lord of Change.

Talk to the Dark Angels about the Horus heresy.

Talk about the Horus heresy.

Talk to an Inquisitor.

Talk to an Imperial Governor.

Ask a Space Marine which chapter they're from

Scribble X WOZ ERE in the dust on the back of an Ironclad !

Emperors Faithful wrote:

A Lictor... BLOR!!! wrote:

Rangerrob wrote:Ask the cute girl with the third purple arm to dance....

You may not like the offspring...errr outcome.

(Got to be an old schooler to understand this one.)

Why not ask her to dance. She and her "cute" little sister with the big head and hypnotic eyes may want to take you back to their place and "initiate" you. Just don't ask what an ovipositor is... you'll find out soon enough...

A Lictor... BLOR!!! wrote:

Rangerrob wrote:Ask the cute girl with the third purple arm to dance....

You may not like the offspring...errr outcome.

(Got to be an old schooler to understand this one.)

Why not ask her to dance. She and her "cute" little sister with the big head and hypnotic eyes may want to take you back to their place and "initiate" you. Just don't ask what an ovipositor is... you'll find out soon enough...

Emperors Faithful wrote:

wuestenfux wrote:Try to keep a Daemonette as a pet.

Cos if you DO

Emperors Faithful wrote:

penut the butter wrote:Turn your back on a slaaneshi anything

Cos if you do...

Isn't anyone getting the message?

Loud and clear!

Try to claim your hard by showing Lucius the Eternal your appendix scar

stick your hand in one of khorns skulls and use your hand to make it talk

claim Cain won't make it out of a situation

question creed or his tactics

ask to try on Yarriks power klaw

Use purity seals as toilet paper.

Tell a chaplain that his prayers will go unanwsered

Play hide and go seek with Marbo?

Or a Lictor?

Get in the Middle of Hide and Go Seek when Marbo and WaffleLictor are playing.

Shooting some pictures from Chaos Daemons.

Toying with the idea to merry a Sister of Battle.

Chosing an Inquisitor as godfather.

Kill Lucius the Eternal and feel pity for him

Do something high-five worthy in the presence of Ferrus Manus.

Ask Ferrus Mannus why he wants his soldiers to be emos.

Dont try to reason with a commisar, hes just a litle plastic man, people would think you were crazy

Dont try to reason with a commisar, even if he were real, people would think you were crazy

Dont tell a sister of battle that her sister is better in bed.

Dont give Calgar a reason to give you a pat on the back.

Dont assume Creed isnt watching you.

Dont introduce dark eldar to The Sims 3.

Dont introduce the Emperors children to 4chan.

Dont try to put a gag fart balloon on the emperors throne.

Dont try to put a gag fart balloon on the throne of skulls.

Dont forget to put a gag fart ballon on Slaneesh's throne if you did either of the other two.

Dont throw Russ a bone.

Dont write ""X" was here" on Gazghuls back.

Dont play "spin the bottle" with daemonettes

Dont tell racist jokes around slamanders

Dont pick on grots with your railguns.

Dont cut your steak with a buzzaw.

Dont cut your steak with a sharpened snotling.

Dont forget to wipe your feet before you enter the Black library.

Dont make a personal nemesis of someone who replaced his arm by a huge metal claw caus he lost his normal one.

Dont make a personal nemesis of someone who replaced his arm by a huge metal claw caus he thought it was cool.

Dont tell a black templar about the black and white space marine on the black and white bike.

Challenge a Space Wolf to a drinking contest.

Arm wrestle Yarrick. (sp?)

Yelling to Celestine, "TAKE YOUR TOP OFF!"

Challenge a Haemonculus to a pinching contest.

Give a sob a hundred bucks and say you wanna go in the rhino?
Piss of EF.

taunt a dreadnaught.

tell creed to take off his power sword since its not in his wargear.

tell a commissar his hat is crooked.

pretend for one moment that sly marbo ISNT right behind you.

Tell sly marbo that you could out-sneak him

challenge sly marbo to a lictor hunt

Attempt to use "Raid" on Tyranids.

Bring a flyswatter to a battle against Tyranids.

Flip the Bird to a Leman Russ Demolish... Hey Where'd that Titan Come from??

..

CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!

Point out to Ahriman that he's spent 10,000 years failing to get into a library guarded by clowns.

Jump Creed with Chosen, WHERE IS YOUR TACTICAL GENIUS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shadowbrand wrote:Jump Creed with Chosen, WHERE IS YOUR TACTICAL GENIUS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That Creed you jumped? It was a Baneblade.

Deathbot wrote:Point out to Ahriman that he's spent 10,000 years failing to get into a library guarded by clowns.

LOL. Ask the Troupe Master "Why so serious, son?"

smack creed across the face. A titan will come out of kell's mouth and stomp on you

hum the batman theme around astartes

grab the foot of an assault marine as he takes off

Crack Twilight jokes in front of the Blood Angels.

Sell Lucius some powdered sugar.

Get Marbo drunk.

Drive/pilot any AV 10, Open-topped vehicle.

Fart as a commishinner bends to tie his shoes.

get out of bed.

Trick yourself into thinking that it will be a wonderful day.
Tell a space marine to do a better job protecting mankind.
Tell Abbadon that you would have destroyed the Imperium the during the first black crusade.

ask a demon prince of khorn directions...

ask a carnifex directions...

ask a CSM lord directions...

ask and eldar farseer directions...

heck... ask anybody directions...

Elegost

Tell the custodes that the emperor is dead.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Oh crap. Now EF and his inquisation are gonna kill me!

Erm... the Emperor isn't dead...YET! *unplug throne*

power fist high five

Play Chicken With a Korne Berzerker.

Arm wrestle with Yarrick.

Say to Marneus that that his terminator armor makes him look fat.

And don't EVER assume that you killed that necron on the floor over there......(Brass hum in back ground...)AAAAGGG!!!

@Penut: We're coming for you...(get the toast ready!)

Don't ever, EVER say "We'll it could be worse."

*Cue Hive Fleet/Ork Rok/Planet Killer etc*

Get charged....unless your a space wolf.

Try Again Bragg wrote:smack creed across the face. A titan will come out of kell's mouth and stomp on you

That wasn't Creed. It was Abbadon the Despoiler.

CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ask the Emperor if you can have a sip of his Pskyer Soul Shake.

Ask Moriar the Chosen for a high five.

Play chess with Eldrad.

Try to chat up a Daemonette.

Keep Nurglings as pets.

Ask the Big Mek to fix your computer.

Paint yer trukk anyfin' but RED.

Ask a new plasma gun from Techmarine after exploding 5 of them.
Also, don't wanna be noob but where does all this CREEEEEEEEED things come from?

nyyman wrote:Also, don't wanna be noob but where does all this CREEEEEEEEED things come from?

If you don't know, count yourself lucky.

Cannot... Unsee...

Gwar! wrote:

nyyman wrote:Also, don't wanna be noob but where does all this CREEEEEEEEED things come from?

If you don't know, count yourself lucky.

Cannot... Unsee...

In the IG rulebook it gives Uruksar Creed the special rule 'tactical genius'. In simple terms, this rule allows you to give the scout rule to any single unit on your side. (Note, it doesn't say that it must be an IG unit.) So theoretically, Creed could be able to outflank a baneblade, or even a Warlord Titan into the side of the enemy. This has lead to much credo (although well deserved) about Creeds ability to outflank and pull things off that would seem impossible (like outflanking with whole planets, or infilitrating a boltgun in someones boltgun), with his enemies shouting in frustration CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!

Emperors Faithful wrote:with his enemies shouting in frustration CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!

Which in turn is an Homage to the greatest, sexiest and most manly man ever to have graced the manliness of manhood, registering a 34 on the Chuck Norris Manliness Scale (Which has an upper limit is 10), William Shatner:

...LOL (did you see the last bit?)

Tell your commander that you quit.
Ask an Etheral what does sitting behind a desk and saying "For The Greater Good" acomplish anything.

CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED

Sneak into an SM chapter base and go Termie-tipping!

Say "oh, there's no way that pig can take down a battle-cruiser in low orbit"

Turn the switch to 'OFF' on an Imperial Battlecruiser.

Play pin-the-tail-on-the-squiggoth.

Play pin-the-tail-on-the-slaanesh fiend.

Play pin-the-tail-on-anything or anyone from 40k.

Play chicken with a landraider.

When advancing, do NOT 'pull-the-finger' to that jerk Warlord Titan that forgot to put it's indicator on.

Trick out a land raider.
Call in sick.
Build a shop.
Tell a soldier that you'll see him tommorow.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Tell a commisar that his plan is plain ol' suicide.

creeeeeeeeeeeeeeed

Cool picture!
Enter a Sister of Battle into a wet T-shirt contest.

LOL

Unbplug the Golden Throne so you can use the plug for the new plasma sreen tv.



Automatically Appended Next Post:
Fart while in the presense of a commisar.

try to whisper a Defiler.

steal an espiritual Eldar stone.

say "I'm da stompiest!" in front of a bigger ork.

wake up some Necrons from their tombs.

jump into a disformity warp.

stay behind an Assault Space Marine when he jumps.

be in the 41st millenium

Ask to see a Chaos Space Marine's ticket after he boards a ship.
Tell a soldier that there is a thread on dakka dakka that people use to make fun of them.
Buy a peice of art and place it in your cousin's house on Armeggedon.

Lord of battles wrote:LOL

"LOL"

Oh and post-count farm too.

Live. That's a certain ticket to hell in the 40k universe.

Sneeze in front of an Inquisitor.

Talk about the theory of the emperor's death in front of an Inquisitor.

Talk in front/behind/within 7 kloms of an Inquisitor.

I am oggldy boggled at your post count.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Grab a flamer and run through a meth lab.

I wouldn't do that in real life either.

Dont press "dat button" on a looted wagon.

person person wrote:Dont press "dat button".

Fixed it for ya!

Dont:

Put tongue in on your first date with the Daemonette

Thread flowers thorugh your hair, paint your armour pink, and skip thourgh the middle of a cities-of-death battle

Stare at the orks. They dont like it.

Spray "Librarian TigTig Waz Here" on the side of Abbadon's battle barge.

Key-scratch the comissar's Chimera.

Use a myconetic spore as a urinal.

Ask a Space Marine how his children are.

Write "Fragile: Handle with care" on the side of a Stompa.

Descide to write a childrens picture book dedicated to the education of children on the evils of chaos.

Write a childrens book featuring Slaanesh.

Stand on the back of a Sisters of battle rino and Play a song by the band "Burn the Priest"

Ask an inquisitor on a date.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Wear Denim around a Genestealer

Buy cat-nip for a ripper.

Buy cat-nip for a ripper.

Buy cat-nip for a ripper.

Too many posts...


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Don't use thunder hammers grots and SM bikes for a game of polo

Go for a walk in the woods on Catcha. (not a clue if this is right)

try to domesticate a Catchan devil.

milk a grox on the wrong side.

Ask Nurgle if he's a carrier...

Use a:
Power sword

Power Axe

Power fist

Relic Blade

Nemesis force weapon

or the commissar's new sword

as a tooth pick.

Watch a game of chess played by either two of the following: Creed/Eldrad/Tzeench

Caelun Niveus wrote:Watch a game of chess played by either two of the following: Creed/Eldrad/Tzeench

Tzeentch: Hmm... great, my elaborate tactics and thinking 973,535,279,373,254 moves ahead proved quite useful. Only two turns left to my overwhelming vict- wait, wha- WHAT IS THAT QUEEN DOING HERE!

lol

Calling a Salamanders SM a '[see forum posting rules]'

(sorry if this casues any offence to anyone)

Edit:
Well that worked great

Even without looking at the forum rules I can estimate what the word is...

Thou shall not call a force sword a "light saber"
Thou shall not call a Dreadnought "gramps"
When a Sister of Battle is in the Red Rage, thou shall not refuse to give away your chocolate rations.
A Tau Shield Drone is not a skate board.
Thou shall not use a bug zapper during a Tyranid invasion.
Thou shall not ride a Carnifix like a mechanical bull. Or any Tyranid for that matter.
Thou shall not offer to buy something from an Ork.
Thou shall not play Thriller near Plaguebringers.
Thou shall not quote Terminator around Necrons.
Thou shall not take the Titan out for a "spin"
Thou shall not use the Rhino to "pick up chicks"
Thou shall not call a Daemonette a "tramp" regardless of how true it is.
You are not the will of the Emperor, get back to the front line.

Edit:
Put that down, you don't know where it's been.
Thou shall not use a melta to roast marshmallows.
I don't care what it looks like, thou shall not comment on a Tau's forehead.
You do not expect the Imperial Inquisition
Thou shall not use a chainsword to cut your dinner.
Thou shall not offer a Emperor's Children a hand.
A Bolter duck-taped to a Flammer is not a combi-weapon.
Thou shall not fart while in the presence of the God-Emperor
Though shall use servo skulls as Halloween decorations.

Once more!:
Thou shall not use a lasgun as a flashlight, lazer sight, lighter, meal warmer, ect ect. Guardsmen need a weapon too.

LOL to all.

Phone up an Ork Warboss and ask to speak to his gretchin master!

Forget to pay your taxes

Play a guitar with gauntlets of Utramar's powerfield turned on.

Engage in light conversation with an Inquisitor

Play spot the heretic......






and point at an inquisitor.

Tell an Inquisitor that Chaos Space Marines are misunderstood and just want to be loved

person person wrote:Play spot the heretic......






and point at an inquisitor.

penut the butter wrote:Tell an Inquisitor that Chaos Space Marines are misunderstood and just want to be loved

LOL
You know what, Eisenhorn? That Abaddon bloke ain't half bad. Sure, he's killed millions. But I just reckon e's 'aving a bad hundred millenia...

Back on topic, asking Kharn if you can stroke his pwetty hair hanging from his helm...

Join the Guard.

Try to justify or create female space marines...

Tea bag the emperor while he is helpless.

Travel forward in time to the 40k universe and actually attempt everything mentioned in this forum.

Try to appease the Tyranids with cookies.

TheFirstBorn wrote:Tea bag the emperor while he is helpless.

AHAABAAHJAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHDASTROFL
AAHAHAHHA

Destroyer wrote:Try to justify or create female space marines...

Damn... I'm already done for then... LOL

Be a penal legionnaire and scratch at your explosive collar

Ask were all the emperors poop goes
Tell the commissar that he ain't so tough
If your IG talk like a Ork boy (this will case panic because the think there going to be attacked by a ork boy.)

Possibly the WORST THING to do
You have two girlfriends, a slannesh daemon and a Sob and arrive at your house at the same time.
Lol who would win?

WarhammerTabletop wrote:Possibly the WORST THING to do
You have two girlfriends, a slannesh daemon and a Sob and arrive at your house at the same time.
Lol who would win?

Definatley not you....hope you keep those painkillers handy

Make a Sister of Battle your girlfriend and then break up with her

ChristmasMarine wrote:

WarhammerTabletop wrote:Possibly the WORST THING to do
You have two girlfriends, a slannesh daemon and a Sob and arrive at your house at the same time.
Lol who would win?

Definatley not you....hope you keep those painkillers handy

Well if I open up my painkillers a baneblade will come out
well here it goes "opens pills"

Oh no not a titan

CCCRRREEEEEEDD!

CREEEEEDDDNESS TO THE MAX!

WarhammerTabletop wrote:Well if I open up my painkillers a baneblade will come out
well here it goes "opens pills"

Oh no not a titan

CCCRRREEEEEEDD!

"and the enemies of mankind shalt despair, for Creed hath revealed his ultimate bathroom cleaner"

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLL


Automatically Appended Next Post:

BaronIveagh wrote:Join the Guard.

Or any force actually