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I don't understand women, and they probably don't understand me (not many people do), so it balances out.

Oh I don't think women understand me, either.

But then....

Nobody understands me

Slarg232 wrote:Oh I don't think women understand me, either.

But then....

Nobody understands me

Avatar 720 wrote:I don't understand women, and they probably don't understand me (not many people do), so it balances out.

Aw, look. it's DakkaMatch.com!

DakkaMatch.com. Where the odds are good, but the goods are odd.

Monster Rain wrote:DakkaMatch.com. Where the odds are good, but the goods are odd.

That's like business card good!

LunaHound wrote:

DutchKillsRambo wrote:Why people in SUV's seem to feel their car can stop better in the snow than normal car? Maybe there is slight differences but I dunno. Seems to me I see more 4x4's in the ditch than any other. Pure anecdotal evidence btw.

When i first came to Canada, my parents were buying cars. They were told by the sales person that
SUV generally have 4 wheel drive, designed for all year, tougher incase crashes, and heavier for more traction.

People that think more traction means they can drive 60 in a blizzard with no consequences.

Women who, when I hold a door for them, tell me "I can do it myself" or "I don't need men to hold doors for me, thanks". Listen hag, I hold the door for anyone that is going through the dorr at the same time, it's called being polite.

alarmingrick wrote:

Slarg232 wrote:Oh I don't think women understand me, either.

But then....

Nobody understands me

Avatar 720 wrote:I don't understand women, and they probably don't understand me (not many people do), so it balances out.

Aw, look. it's DakkaMatch.com!

That would depend on Slarg being Bisexual or Homosexual, being attracted to me, and being willing to cross the ocean, because I refuse to step foot on a winged tube of metal filled with loads of other people flying thousands of feet above a vast sea, and relying on nothing going wrong, and things tend to go wrong around me.

Monster Rain wrote:DakkaMatch.com. Where the odds are good, but the goods are odd.

alarmingrick wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:DakkaMatch.com. Where the odds are good, but the goods are odd.

That's like business card good!

It is, well done


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mattyboy22 wrote:Women who, when I hold a door for them, tell me "I can do it myself" or "I don't need men to hold doors for me, thanks". Listen hag, I hold the door for anyone that is going through the dorr at the same time, it's called being polite.

This too. Also people who seem to think you're a doorman or just doing it for fun. I don't have time to wait for all of you, someone take over so I can leave!

What confuses me is why people think i have to have a samile on all the time.

mattyboy22 wrote:
Women who, when I hold a door for them, tell me "I can do it myself" or "I don't need men to hold doors for me, thanks". Listen hag, I hold the door for anyone that is going through the dorr at the same time, it's called being polite.

At some instincual level, holding the door open for someone is a proposition for intercourse.

Trust me, I'm a doctor.*

*I'm not actually a doctor.

Nerivant wrote:
Trust me, I'm a doctor.

Not the doctor?

Anyway, I don't understand why men claim to not understand women*, they aren't that different (aside from the obvious physiological issues).



*This is a lie.

mattyboy22 wrote: Women who, when I hold a door for them, tell me "I can do it myself" or "I don't need men to hold doors for me, thanks". Listen hag, I hold the door for anyone that is going through the dorr at the same time, it's called being polite.

I was 12 and going into a grocery store's front door. I saw an older lady(40 something) and held the door for her. She called me a "male chauvinist pig". I was 12. I didn't understand anything but that she was a bitch.

alarmingrick wrote:
I was 12 and going into a grocery store's front door. I saw an older lady(40 something) and held the door for her. She called me a "male chauvinist pig". I was 12. I didn't understand anything but that she was a bitch.

A couple years ago I took my girlfriend on a week long trip for her birthday. I don't remember exactly how much I spent, but something upwards 2k USD. It was basically 7 "birthday dates" (Expensive meals, expensive activities, etc.) in a row. It was ridiculously extravagant, but I had just taken a second job (of a sort) and was in the "Holy gak, disposable income!" phase.

After I told her (3 weeks in advance) what we were doing, she refused to speak to me for 2 days because not letting her pay for anything (Not that she could have, being a student.) was "chauvinist".

dogma wrote:

alarmingrick wrote:
I was 12 and going into a grocery store's front door. I saw an older lady(40 something) and held the door for her. She called me a "male chauvinist pig". I was 12. I didn't understand anything but that she was a bitch.

A couple years ago I took my girlfriend on a week long trip for her birthday. I don't remember exactly how much I spent, but something upwards 2k USD. It was basically 7 "birthday dates" (Expensive meals, expensive activities, etc.) in a row. It was ridiculously extravagant, but I had just taken a second job (of a sort) and was in the "Holy gak, disposable income!" phase.

After I told her (3 weeks in advance) what we were doing, she refused to speak to me for 2 days because not letting her pay for anything (Not that she could have, being a student.) was "chauvinist".

Mate your like casanova!

I've got disposable income.. I still get my missus a bag of cheetos for her birthday!

The politicians in Australia.

They legalise paintball, ban airsoft, and ban any sort of Live action roleplay on the grounds that it would encourage people to fight each other.

When I can kick the living daylights out of someone in my Ninjitsu dojo just 15 minutes up the road from me.

You can't buy pistols or rifles, except from the government. You can only buy ammunition from accredited dealers who all are in the metropolitan area....

Its so confusing.

mattyrm wrote:Mate your like casanova!

I've got disposable income.. I still get my missus a bag of cheetos for her birthday!

I also bought her a ring, and freaked her out with the proposal stance.

She slapped me, but I deserved that one.

Doctadeth wrote:The politicians in Australia.

They legalise paintball, ban airsoft, and ban any sort of Live action roleplay on the grounds that it would encourage people to fight each other.

When I can kick the living daylights out of someone in my Ninjitsu dojo just 15 minutes up the road from me.

You can't buy pistols or rifles, except from the government. You can only buy ammunition from accredited dealers who all are in the metropolitan area....

Its so confusing.

you forgot videogame ban thingy.

Why people go onto threads obviously not concerning them (I.e. Brony threads) and commenting things such as "WTH is wrong with you?!?!?", and more along those lines. Hey, I don;t go onto your football (English) thread and say "You're messed up in the head, watching 22 fully grown men, with a combined IQ lower than that of one said animated horse, chase a ball around a muddy pitch all day."

Honestly, it isn't trolling, it's called being a donkey cave. Why do people do it? I honestly cannot fathom it. I guess to induce nerdrage, but that would be like trying to turn a GK to Chaos.

We have people who fly confederate flags and have SS tattoos in my town. I live in a little town in california and as far as I know we did not fight for the south in the civil war and I am fairly sure we did not fight for germany in WWII.

So now I go around town and steal confederate flags off trucks and houses

Johnny-Crass wrote:We have people who fly confederate flags and have SS tattoos in my town. I live in a little town in california and as far as I know we did not fight for the south in the civil war and I am fairly sure we did not fight for germany in WWII.

So now I go around town and steal confederate flags off trucks and houses

Y'know its funny the so called "Confederate Flag" isnt even the flaf og the confederacy. It was the flag of a small regiment near the end of the war.
But yeah. How did a flag of hatred that is thought to be the flag of an army that fought for their right to own people and make them work for them considered a point of pride.

People who are willing to maintain an illusion in the face of damning evidence.

Nerivant wrote:People who are willing to maintain an illusion in the face of damning evidence.

One of my best mates is a devout Catholic, I dont even want to tell you how many times we have had the "evolution is a proven fact" argument, and not even "the pope said so too!" is good enough for him.

The Pope is a foolish old man when it comes to Science apparently.

dogma wrote:

Scary..

Johnny-Crass wrote:We have people who fly confederate flags and have SS tattoos in my town. I live in a little town in california and as far as I know we did not fight for the south in the civil war and I am fairly sure we did not fight for germany in WWII.

So now I go around town and steal confederate flags off trucks and houses

2 reasons.

Rural California actively attempts to out white trash the south.

White X cons tend to have a lot of white supremacy tattoos even if they are not racist. They will often tend to join white supremacy prison gangs regardless of what their opinions are of racism or other races. The fact is whites are an oppressed minority in prison (26% of the CA prison population), and the white supremacy gangs to have great recruitment incentives: Join us and we won't knock your teeth out, shank you, rape you, kill you, and give you AIDS, not necessarily in any particular order. California prisons are so overcrowded that the inmates run the system, and the system breeds racism.

hotsauceman1 wrote:

Frazzled wrote:

hotsauceman1 wrote:

alarmingrick wrote:

biccat wrote:

alarmingrick wrote:

grishnaz wrote:The people on deal or no deal

No silly, the people at Nascar events! Even the ones that are driving real fast and turn to the left.....

Which, as boring as it is, still remains a better sport to watch than MLB.

I'm no NASCAR fan (since I'm not an inbred redneck, apparently a necessary precondition), but I fething hate baseball with a passion.

You've managed to find something I can agree with you on! MLB does suck!

Too me, All sports suck unless you are actually playng them
Also this confuses me. Why do teachers make custom books that have something special in them for their class that can only be baought at the school bookstore. This way i am forced to buy the books from the overpriced bookstore.

You asnwered your own question. $$$$

Yet those same teachers complain about how tuition is going up.

I can complain too and still cash a check.

mattyboy22 wrote:
Women who, when I hold a door for them, tell me "I can do it myself" or "I don't need men to hold doors for me, thanks". Listen hag, I hold the door for anyone that is going through the dorr at the same time, it's called being polite.

I hold the door open for women all the time and I have never once had a single one react in any way other than pleasant surprise. Frankly, I'm not sure how I would respond to this.

Tit-punch?

Albatross wrote:Tit-punch?

I was thinking a callus letting of the door slam in her face, but I fear I'm in reality not enough of a badass to let myself do that.

daedalus wrote:

Albatross wrote:Tit-punch?

I was thinking a callus letting of the door slam in her face, but I fear I'm in reality not enough of a badass to let myself do that.

You could always tell just us you did do it, that way you get all of the kudos, with none of the risk. It's what the internet was invented for!

Albatross wrote:

daedalus wrote:

Albatross wrote:Tit-punch?

I was thinking a callus letting of the door slam in her face, but I fear I'm in reality not enough of a badass to let myself do that.

You could always tell just us you did do it, that way you get all of the kudos, with none of the risk. It's what the internet was invented for!

I have always found the following response works best:

"Oh, Sorry I thought you were a man."


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What confuses me is people who feel the need to explain their life story to tech support for a password reset.