40k Vending Machine I: Just As Planned

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**EmberlordofFire8**

You get Ernie.

I wanted to insert Cadia, but...

I insert Bert.

**brushcommando**

you get an argument with Ernie.

I insert banner ads...

**snurl**

You get clickbait.

I insert a smurf.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get five apples.

I insert the Tasmanian Devil.

**BigWaaagh**

You get Ren Hoek.

I insert Trump's hairpiece.

**snurl**

You get the golden fleece.

I insert a door.

**ZergSmasher**

You get a Stargate.

I insert a Goa'uld symbiote.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get the enemy within.

I insert an old gym sock.

**snurl**

You get a puppet.

I insert a paint brush.

**EmberlordofFire8**

You get Duncan. Now remember to apply TWO thin coats.

I insert Rod Stewart.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get Maggie May.

I insert a bird nest.

**ZergSmasher**

You get a bowl of soup.

I insert a Pidgey.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a pidgeotto.

I insert a disc of Tzeentch.

**snurl**

You get a disc of '80s hits!

I insert JK Rowling.

**ZergSmasher**

You get a fantastic beast.

I insert a Starfleet Type 2 Phaser.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get an inverse tachyon pulse.

I insert a hair dryer.

**snurl**

You get hair conditioner.

I insert very small rocks.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a witch (who weighs the same as a duck.)

I insert a rabbit.

**ZergSmasher**

You get a headless corpse.

I insert a bar of lead.

**War Kitten**

You get a pencil.

I insert Trollzyn

**korbenn**

You get robbed of you most prized possession.

I insert those pictures of Saint Celestine doing a striptease that are grounds for immediate summary execution by the Inquisition.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a visit from the inquisition.

I insert an old Bette Davis movie.

**snurl**

You get bored.

I insert the Tingler.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a scream and a Castle masterpiece.

I insert the extra best thermos you can buy.

**korbenn**

You get a stasis capsule containing a tiny Roboute Guilleman.

I insert a rooster, a cat, a dog and a donkey.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get a trip to Bremen.

I insert a disc of Thomas Dolby's greatest hits.

**korbenn**

You get the soundtrack of an unrelated movie.

I insert a bizarro version of the Emperor.

**Chaos Legionnaire**

You get Ming the Merciless.

I insert a d4.

**snurl**

You get a caltrop.

I insert shag carpet.

**korbenn**

You a funkadelic soundtrack.

I insert a box of cupcakes.