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Voss wrote:

 Flinty wrote:
Thanks Voss. I was trying to get my daughter to watch that yesterday and she declined. I’ll probably just watch it myself

Its definitely worth watching. Its probably worth watching before showing it to kids, as it veers from kid-friendly to I-can-see-parents-freaking-out at times. I'm not a good judge of that, as my only frame of reference is rural parents freaking out about what's in the library and demanding things-they-don't-like be banned.

Just to be clear,

Spoiler:

Amongst other things (the normal stuff people-don't-like), when it does go heavy, suicidal ideation and murder-the-Other jump to the front of the story

Managed to talk Flinty the younger into taking this on, and we both loved it. Some real emotional peaks and troughs, but i really like the art style and the voice cast nailed it. Some really awesome set pieces, fight scenes and viginettes scattered throughout.

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Ah fair! I didn’t get the chance to watch much US fare in those days.

The main villain in UHF is amazing.

He's been playing the same villain character forever Just love to hate him. years before that he was in Ace High as more or less an evil banker type character. Haven't seen that one in a while but it's very enjoyable.

Odd Man Rush

A rom-com about Hockey? Sure, I'll give it a try!

A college hockey player gets injured and goes to the Swedish Minor Leagues to try and make his was to the NHL. While there, he meets a nice Swedish girl.

The end is ambiguous as all get-out and you, as the audience; get to decide what happens. I don't mind this in movies, as it forces you to look back at the movie and try to build a case on which way it played out.

That said, the movie is heavy on the "Minor league lifestyle", which seems really hollow. Light on the Romance, and a dry form of comedy.

Not for most people but I found it an acceptable way to spend 90 minutes or so. Not going to change your life but a competently done film. In this day and age, a competent film is pretty high praise.

Would you recommend it to someone, like me, who has no grasp of (I presume) Ice Hockey and it’s league structure?

How does it compare to the other rom com about an injured Hockey player, The Cutting Edge?

Transformers Eleventy: Rise Of The Beasts

I had a brief moment as I sat down to watch this where I asked myself why I keep doing this to myself?

I mean, let's be honest, the first Bay film wasn't exactly stellar, and it's largely been a trajectory of confusingly edited, much-too-close-to-the-action-to-tell-what's-happening™ diminishing returns since.

So I guess an attitude of "how much worse could it be?" with a small dash of goodwill from Bumblebee I forged on.

So having made it through to the end I can report that ROTB is...

Not bad.

Probably the best move it makes is to set itself in 1994, neatly sidestepping most of the movies that came before, and therefore establishing a relatively blank canvas.

Sadly, what it does with this canvas is very much the same formula of "humans discover existence of giant transforming robots, they come together to face some existential threat, the end."

I guess the thing that places it above many of the other entries to the franchise is that I found the humans more likeable than in most others, and that won't apply to everyone. Otherwise, the CGI consistently felt 5% off what it needed to be, never quite convincing me that the Transformers were really in the environment with the rest of the on screen action. The action was fairly by the numbers, but entertaining enough, probably exactly what the core audience is expecting.

Ultimately this feels like a movie made by the studio to appeal to an already well understood core base, with zero effort to broaden its appeal. If you've seen any other film in the franchise it's almost certain it'll be exactly what you expect, good or bad, with the one caveat that its perhaps not as bad as the worst.

A Walk In The Woods - Grumpy/10

There's something about Robert Redford that just oozes class. He feels like the kind of old school Hollywood actor who you'd stand up for if he entered the room, and naturally call him sir until he told you otherwise.

There's something about Nick Nolte that just oozes creepy uncle vibes. He feels like someone you've known forever (but not by choice), and every time you see him you're both surprised he's alive, and amazed that he keeps finding work.

Together they make an interesting pair of grumpy old men who decide to walk the Appalachian Trail, Redford's character because he wants to get out there and experience the world he feels he's missing in his old age, Nolte's character because he's the only one of Redford's friends/acquaintances who actually wanted to go (and he wasn't asked, it found out about the trek through a mutual friend).

This is actually a comedy, and it's a damned funny one at that. Several very laugh-out-loud moments, and some great characters playing small roles (Kristen Schaal, Mary Steenburgen, Emma Tompson). Definitely worth the hour and a half it takes to watch. It was on Amazon Prime. Great performances from both Redford and Nolte, and some wonderful scenery as well.

One nice touch was the use of voiceover for Redford's character reading notes. The note would always be read by the character who wrote it, and if Redford stopped reading it the voiceover would just cut mid-sentence. This happened when he was reading lots of ghoulish stories about deaths on the trail that his wife found for him, so they're all Emma Tompson explaining things only to be suddenly cut off as he tosses the paper aside and moves onto the next one.



Mission: Impossible: Dead: Reckoning: Part: 1 - :/10

The 7th entry in the M:I franchise sees the return of numerous characters, including one not seen since the very first film. It also introduces a few new characters, one of whom is Esai Morales as Gabriel, described as a "dark messiah" for the film's main villain, a literal AI gone rogue called "The Entity". I like Morales, and he makes for a calm and steely bad guy who doesn't grandstand or monologue. His words are backed up by lethal actions, and he's a True Believer™ in his cause, which makes him very dangerous.

It also introduces Hayley Atwell, as an in-over-her-head thief named Grace. I don't need to say much about her beyond: It's Hayley Atwell! She's basically perfect in every way.

Also Shea Whigham as this hapless cop who spends the entire movie trying to hunt down Cruise' character (but not like the cop from M:I4; this is very different). He was a lot of fun.

M:I7 is an expertly filmed, tightly plotted piece of extravagant blockbuster cinema that feels gritty and raw and harsh and real. Yes, it uses a lot of FX, but they try to do as much practically as possible, and for sequences like the extensive and amazing chase through Rome you just feel how dangerous it is (compare it to the chase in Fast X, which I love, but M:I7 is just a cut above... several cuts above!). And they really save the big stunt for right at the end, during the big climax on the Orient Express (literally!). The fight on the train is also very cool.

One quick duck into spoiler territory:
Not everything is perfect. The film's Dragon, 'Paris', played by Pom Klementieff, is criminally underused, and whilst I like arc she has, she is one of those henchman who says very little (and never gets to use her sword, as Ilsa steals it!). The start of the film is also very heavy on exposition, so much so that there is a scene where the characters do spend a while talking about stuff that they all already know and, if you'd been paying attention to the scene before, you should already know as well.

The Entity, whilst total sci-fi land, is a terrifying unseen main villain, and as mentioned before, Gabriel as his acolyte/enforcer makes for quite the spooky and effective team. And speaking of teams, outside of Ilsa we have Benji and Luther back. I'm a bit worried about Luther, or really Ving Rhames, as he spends every scene he's in sitting down and exits about 2/3rds of the way through. I hope there's no health concerns that have limited his screentime, because Luther has been one of the only constants in this series outside of Cruise, and it would suck to have less of him. Benji is tons of fun, as usual. Also lots more Vanessa Kirby in this one, which certainly isn't a bad thing. I love how she keeps calling Cruise's character "John", because she really doesn't know who he is outside of who he was pretending to be in the last film.

Interestingly, despite being a film that has "Part 1" in the title, this film doesn't short-change you with a cliffhanger ending (much as I love Fast X, that ending is so abrupt and has so many unresolved issues and questions!). It has a very clear and distinct ending, with objectives met and lives saved. But it sets up the next film, and what the objectives of the heroes and villains will be. No idea when we'll see this film, what with the Hollywood strikes crippling the industry, but I can't want to see what insane nonsense Cruise and Mcquarrie have planned next.

I haven’t yet seen M:I7, but I just saw a film that is everything it isn’t.


Sharknado 6: It’s About Time aka The Last Sharknado

This movie has no class, terrible choreography, laughably bad special effects, and a stupidity so sharp it’s almost brilliant—almost as in it comes back around into hyperstupid. The stunt casting and hokey homages continue, but there’s an added schmaltz for that Hallmark Channel tugging effect. The final action scene is ambitiously bonkers, but with the worst, cheapest effects in the whole series. It’s…borderline experimental. And like all the insane parts, I’m half-sure they did it that way on purpose.

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Would you recommend it to someone, like me, who has no grasp of (I presume) Ice Hockey and it’s league structure?

It really doesn't matter at all. The movie tells you the key things you need to know.

Compared to other Hockey Rom-Coms there is a reason you have not heard of this one, but you have heard of "The Cutting Edge". This one has a much more "modern" look and feel to it, and it does not choreograph a happy-ending. There is even 4th wall breaking at key parts of the story.


Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

The movie looks great, and is ridiculous. The fighting is way to jump-cut for my liking. Many of the fight scenes lack any real sense of danger or even interest. However, I could not help but smile and laugh at the ridiculous way they tried to tie it to real history, real people, and real places. Just.... WOW.... what an effort to make something so over-the-top silliness; and ultimately makes the movie make not a lot of sense if you think about it for more than 1 second. However, you are really here to see Ol' Abe kill confederate vampires with an axe.

Death Ranch

A latter day Blaxploitation flick where our three African American anti-heroes, on the lam, find their safe house is in fact home to canibal Klansmen.

The action is uneven with some distinctly flaccid kills, but also some amusingly inventive ones. And I’m pretty sure the filmmakers made good use of the silly sheets, as we only see three or four Klansmen with their hoods off, with the others I’d swear being the same actors coming back from kills as different characters.

As enjoyable as seeing Klansmen getting dead, this is….average at best? As with many such obviously low budget efforts, the heart is there, and with that the makings of something really enjoyable. It just didn’t quite come together for me.

That being said, the gun play may feel subdued because it’s more realistic? Like folk being hit by a shotgun and not going flying, the pistols going pop rather than bang, and it not being one-shot, one kill on the torso.


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And now?

White Settlers

A horror in the vein of Straw Dogs, set in the Scottish Borders. Confusingly, Pollyanna McIntosh (Scottish) plays half of an English couple, and Joanne Mitchell (English) plays a Scottish woman.

Plot seems to be Londoners buy a farmhouse in The Borders, are horrific jerks about the locals, and the locals take umbrage because You’re Not Local.

Which is weird. Because my Dad lives in the Borders, an area where many folk live in one part of the country and work in the other, so the tensions they’re gonna be playing on are entirely invented outside of the most Nationalistic Idiots.

I’m gonna go ahead and not expect a great deal from this. Kind of expecting to deliver that in abundance.

Cleanse your palate with Dog Soldiers

I gave up. There’s nothing particularly wrong with the movie and acting like. But the whole “every Scot am hate the English” is just too tenuous for anyone who’s spent time in the Borders.

Complete change of pace now, as I have a couple of days off work to settle my mental health a bit.

Stepford Wives (2004)

Much more of a horror comedy than its very well regarded predecessor. And what a cast and crew.

Frank Oz directs, with Nicole Kidman, Better Midler, Matthew Broderick, Christopher Walken and Glenn Close starring.

19 years later, amidst artificial culture wars, this movie gains an interesting new perspective.

Nicole Kidman’s character isn’t a pleasant individual. At all. TV Network Exec who seems to risen to fame off exploitative TV. When it goes too far, and a man humiliated on one of her shows gets trigger happy, she loses her job. This is why she and husband Matthew Broderick move to Stepford.

She’s not a good person, wife or mother. Too caught up in her own career progression.

But, Stepford is basically an Incel’s wet dream. Women with literally pneumatic chests which can be changed at (husband’s) will. All forced to be obsessed with homemaking and making Good Little Wives etc.

But, being played so heavily tongue in cheek it really dances around quite serious issues fairly neatly, with a dollop of Fembots from Austin Powers. And so much of it is in the dialogue, with a couple whose marriage is in jeopardy trying to find the right compromise between themselves to get things back on track. Indeed all the protagonists are presented as flawed persons who want to change and improve themselves.

I suspect those on the extremes are going to loathe this for their own peculiar reasons. But the core is a warm hearted critique of selfishness, and an encouragement of finding your own happy medium. Which frankly the word could do with an awful lot more of.


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Walking Tall

The Rock and Johnny Knoxville star in this oddly flaccid revenge/justice movie. A remake of the original, which itself was based on a true story.

Basically bloke returns from serving in the army, to find his hometown changed. Cedar Mill has shutdown, replaced as the main employer by a crooked Casino run by a childhood friend, who essentially runs the town. The Rock cleans up, bad guys go boom, Mill reopens. Hurrah and huzzah, FIN.

Despite getting a cinematic release, this really does feel like a TV Movie. It’s OK I guess. Not something I think I’d ever pay to see, but entertaining enough to stay your channel hopping finger whether it’s being broadcast or one you stick on streaming.


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Trading Places

Eddie Murphy and Dan Aykroyd classic. And classic for good reason.

Has some signs of the times, such as language and some blackface, but this serves to remind against Eddie Murphy’s later career he was genuinely talented before he turned annoying.


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Humanoids Of The Deep

Hi kids, I’m Doug McClure.

When I was watching this movie I was devouring three pots of Olives, as Sainsbury’s (a UK supermarket chain) has them on special for Nectar Card holders. £2 a pot for these delicious little veggies.

Sadly two of the pots weren’t pitted, which will learn me to read the label. But they were tasty all the same. My favourites however were the Garlic and Jalapeño stuffed Halkidiki Olives. Those were amazing.

No I’m not going to discuss the film because it is indeed that bloody awful.

Is “Better Middler” the result of Barbra Streisand’s mind taking control of Bette Midler’s body?

No it’s a typo 😂😂

And how dare you! Bette Middler is divine. Unlike the inexplicable Streisand

Trading Places is a lot of fun. The gorilla suit thing at the end inspired a bunch of similar jokes that have aged poorly, but thematically leads into Humanoids From the Deep.

HFTD is a great movie for a teenager to find on cable. Nudity and gore, and the whole boardwalk massacre at the end, just what a young horror hound wants to see. Older, more modern audiences will likely find the exploitation of sexual violence for titillation off-putting. It’s the Revenge of the Nerds phenomenon in a horror setting.


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 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
No it’s a typo 😂😂

And how dare you! Bette Middler is divine. Unlike the inexplicable Streisand

That was a reference to Superior Spider-Man, where Doc Ock (a villain) takes over Spider-Man’s body and decides he can Spider-Man better than Spider-Man.

I just couldn’t with that film. Which is oddly sad, as I was exactly that kid you described.

I guess I’ve just seen it all before, and done much better. But, had I first seen this in isolation? I can see my opinion of it being better. Perhaps even fond.


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Bloodsport

Keeeeeeeeyiiiiiiiii! It’s the Jean-Claude Van Damme martial arts movie. No not that one. That one. Yeah. The one with Bolo Yeung.

This is such a snapshot of cinema history. And thanks to some really well choreographed fisticuffs, far better than it has any right to be. Because what could, should, have been a middling action flick becomes something a wee bit special.

Lovely stuff.

The Brain

Plucky teen versus giant evil brain!
It's your typical low budget 80's fare, with bad acting and shoddy FX, but entertaining if that's your kind of thing.

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Bloodsport

Keeeeeeeeyiiiiiiiii! It’s the Jean-Claude Van Damme martial arts movie. No not that one. That one. Yeah. The one with Bolo Yeung.

This is such a snapshot of cinema history. And thanks to some really well choreographed fisticuffs, far better than it has any right to be. Because what could, should, have been a middling action flick becomes something a wee bit special.

Mortal Kombat exists because of that movie.

Mortal Kombat and that one episode of Babylon 5.


And Jean Claude Van Damme’s career.

Not gonna lie? JCVD is genuinely one of my favourite Acton stars.

Hellraiser

Never really seen it before, but I can see why it was a big success. For a movie about whatever-the-heck-a-Cenobite-is, the movie is surprisingly focused on human reactions and human emotions. I liked it.

Mac and Me

Which should be MAC, as that’s an acronym within the movie.

Ever wanted to know what happens if you’re a lazy studio with a couple of lucrative sponsorship, and absolutely no originality so you just rip off E.T.?

This. This is what happens. This movie is so bad it has to be seen to be believed. Which is kind of handy, because if you haven’t seen it, you can happily ignore/deny its existence and live a richer life for it.

The effects are Bloody Awful. Practical effects yes. For the most part. But really awful, sub Dr Who ones.

However, there are a couple of curious redeeming qualities. For whichever reason, the script had our lead Hooman be in a wheelchair. And to their credit, they actually cast a kid who genuinely uses a wheelchair. Despite having apparently never acted before? He’s honestly pretty good. He was never gonna bother the Oscars here, but if you didn’t know he wasn’t previously a professional or trained actor, you probably wouldn’t know.

There’s also a fairly throwaway line when said kid and his Mum move into their new house, where she points out the house is wheelchair friendly. No steps, wider doors, lower counters, and he’ll be able to see out of every window.

That’s…..that’s touching. Like. Genuinely.

Sadly it’s about the only heart and compassion this movie allows before clobbering its audience senseless with unsubtle “brick through your window” product placement for Coke and McDonalds. Which in the modern day, is like promoting Booze and Ciggies to kids.

The creature effects are particularly crap. See, MAC and his family can’t speak, only whistle. And frankly I’m convinced this is solely because they were too cheap to get decent animatronics, with MAC consistently looking like Not Trustworthy Conservative MP for Surrey Heath Michael Gove if he’d just been goosed.

Don’t believe me?

MAC



Michael Gove



Michael Gove shown slightly more trustworthy than actual level of trustworthy of not very trustworthy.

Also also I think it pinched musical phrases from Predator of all places.

Trading Places - cool. Jamie Lee Curtis, Christmas.

Bloodsport - rocks. Just seen it last year again. Good. Inspired loooods of stuff, including its own sequels and the most fun of the bunch - the excellent The Quest, starring JCVD.

Hellraiser - yup, fine film.

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Not gonna lie? JCVD is genuinely one of my favourite Acton stars.

Nothing wrong with that. He's got it all.




Right, I just watched Tango&Cash for the first time in a long time. What a fun film. Watched it over the internet with a friend who said she'd never watched it. Weird. But she found it sufficiently good. What always bothered me about Tango&Cash is the car stuff in the end. I mean the whole film is more of a "romp" than a story, but the car stuff and always made me feel the ending is bumpy.



I also watche the American Gladiators "docu"-series on Netflix (Muscles and Mayhem). As far as Netflix productions go, it's Okay for what it is. Some weird editing though, in that they used a few lines the interviewed gladiators say several times at different points. That looked a bit sloppy.

There also was a let-down in that the one guy who comes across really well (Nitro) turns out to having become a


But all of that aside, it's very watchable.


I watched all of The Persuaders, because it's brilliant (for the German dub), and I watched 2 episodes of Thunder in Paradise. Which is a bad show.


And then I watched something bad of epic proportions: Iron Mask (2019). Starring Jackie Chan, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Rutger Hauer, very famous Chinese actresses, many surely very famous Russian actors and Jason Flemying. Now he seems to have carved out an interesting niche for himself during the 2010s. Formerly known as "the interesting looking side character from Guy Richies films and the Santa from Chucky's Baby, he then somehow became "the foreign hero guy" in Russian/Chinese historic fantasy films.

So this film is your typical "awesomelol" films into which they throw some famous actors for bit parts and then animate dragons and airships and water ships and monsters and tesla soldiers and robots and magic and trolls around them and hope for a.) Mass audiences and b.) memes. Both of which is an instant failure. Jackie Chan is a bit in it and wears a wig, Arnold is a bit in it and wears a huge fake moustache. And everybody fights all the time, and in between there is nonsense dialogue about prophecies and intrigue and fighting.

The most damning factor about this film though is the look. It's got this insanely sharp, digital look, which makes everything look ultra fake (along with TONS of CGI and greenscreen), but the way this is shot makes it look way faker than it would have to be. It looks like a video game. Yes, video games can look pretty. No, video games never look like a film. They're different things.

Anyway, it's a disgusting-looking and otherwise boring film. Avoid at all Cost.

Watched The Kangaroo Gang on Amazon.

It's about a large group of Australian pick-pockets and shop-lifters who fell upon 1960's London and raked in millions of dollars worth of thefts, most of the time without the victims even knowing they were being robbed. They stole stuff from stores in broad daylight, right in front of the noses of shopkeepers and assistants, using multiple people running a number of distraction techniques whilst others pilfered jewellery and money drawers and all sorts of things.

Tells about their rise and fall, the big figures, the police investigation that got most of them caught, and interviews people on both sides. It's amazing what they got away with. Mini-Ocean's 11 type stuff, all before security cameras and stuff became more common.

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
And to their credit, they actually cast a kid who genuinely uses a wheelchair.

Why is this something that should be "credited"?

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Which in the modern day, is like promoting Booze and Ciggies to kids.

It really isn't.

Mac and Me was pitched as a charity fundraiser first, and movie second. The Ronald McDonald Foundation was involved, which is why McDonald’s features so heavily. That’s also why they wanted the lead to be a child who was “differently abled”. The film’s genesis was less cynical than 99% of films.

And the end result was a nightmare-fuel box office bomb best remembered for Paul Rudd’s running gag.


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My brother and I watched the film whenever it was on—it’s hilariously bad. The MST3K of Mac and Me is one of my favorites.

HBMC wrote:

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
And to their credit, they actually cast a kid who genuinely uses a wheelchair.
Why is this something that should be "credited"?

Because it was the 80’s, a decade not really noted for worrying about authentic casting?

HBMC wrote:
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Which in the modern day, is like promoting Booze and Ciggies to kids.

It really isn't.

Dunno if you noticed, but my reviews are usually intended to be satirical

One Piece:- Red

A decent, if fairly typical, anime series tie-in movie.
Would've enjoyed it more, but it sticks to the modern One Piece movie formula of being a big cameo showcase that has to come up with increasingly convoluted reasons for why the main characters aren't simply steamrolling everything in sight (Much like the series these days).
I prefer the older movies where the crew would simply go on random, wacky adventures that didn't drag in the rest of the world (Again, much like the series used to be).

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Because it was the 80’s, a decade not really noted for worrying about authentic casting?

That didn't answer my question.

People with disabilities are almost completely shut out of the performing arts, so it is nice when a movie remembers they exist and don’t just hire Fisher Stevens and stick him in a wheelchair.

But I get it. You really want to have a go at “diverse city” and don’t find representation for minorities as any way admirable. No one will convince you otherwise, so let’s just agree to disagree that every film should be cast like it’s the 1950’s.

It's tricky. I think I'm sat a bit in the middle about this whole stuff. Of course casting a white person to play an Asian person or stuff like that is silly and race/creed/whatevber shouldn't be a factor in what role an actor/actress plays. We're past that sort of stuff. On the other hand I find Amazons diversity quota and rules absurd and stifling to any sort of creativity and artistry. The first is common sense, the latter is corporate BS. I think that it's perfectly okay for a cis-woman to play a trans woman, or somebody without a lisp playing somebody who has a lisp because it's acting. It's playing pretend and it's exactly the opposite of putting one's own person on the screen or representing oneself.

A role which is written to be a person with a disability can be played by a person with that disability (I assume it's very handy if they do that), but a non-disabled person possibly can play that role as well. It shouldn't be a reason to outrule the latter person right away. We've seen countless convincing and endearing performances like that in the past. I find mixing up on-screen persons with off-sceen persons problematic. It's mixing up the work and the artist and that leads to the whole thing of caring about what actors have to say about day-to-day politics or putting rock singers on a pedestal concerning things which aren't about rock singing, and then we're all really, really surprised that people who are being told that they were "not like everybody else" and get paid absurd moneys for "not being like everybody else" having silly opinions or silly ways of spending their time or treating regular human beings.