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Granted. The guy that gives it to you seemed to think that the chocolate you hate is the chocolate you like. opps.

I wish that some of the comments over the last 19pgs had more dry humour in them.

Granted, I edited one of my posts.

I wish someone read it on the previous page.

Granted. Someone read it. Way to waste a wish there slick.

I wish that my christmas lights would take themselves down.

Granted, if you let them sit where they are for many, many, many centuries, they will disintegrate and fall of themselves.

I wish I could time travel.

Granted. However, you can only travel in time forwards, and at normal speed.

I wish I won more than 4 games in 2010.

Granted. You won every game you played. Now no one will play you.

I wish for some cold beer.

Granted. But the liquid Nitrogen that was used to freeze it entered your body. You die.

I wish for pancakes.

Granted. You have pancakes. But someone else ate them all before you got to them.

I wish that flying cars were available.

Granted. It sucks you will never afford one.

I wish I had a girlfriend...

Granted. But she is everything you despise. And you can't break up w/ her.

I wish I could eat my pancakes :(

Granted. You could eat your pancakes if you had got there first.

I wish that electric snow shovels had been invented.

Granted. Electric snow shovels have been invented, however, you cannot find your extension cord, and they aren't battery powered. Your entire walk and driveway aren't reachable.

I wish I wanted to sleep at night instead of during the day.

Granted. You want to sleep at night but somehow you cannot. Nor during the day. You roam the earth as a zombie, neither alert nor sleeping, in a dreamlike stupor.

I wish these doughnuts were not covered in white powder that gets everywhere.

that zombie thing sounds too much like my waking life already. ugh.

granted. white powder on donuts will not come off because your donuts are frozen.

i wish i were not a zombie.

Granted. You are not a zombie. You fall into a deep sleep and wake up. But where?

I wish my doughnuts were not frozen.

Granted. Your doughnuts are not frozen, but are instead coated in shellac. The powder will not fall off, but they aren't edible either.

I wish that when I do awaken from my deep sleep I am surrounded by beautiful men who want to do my bidding.

Granted, but they try to kill you when you aren't looking. Including when you blink. They also have no idea that they are.

I wish that Dr Who was real

Granted Dr Who was real. Back before his show was cancelled the first time, that is.

I wish for a new box of fresh doughnuts.

Granted, their made of jagged metal though.

I wish that bananas would stop telling me to burn things.

Granted Banannas stop telling you to burn things. They just do it themselves from now on, starting with you, just after you go to sleep.

I wish I could remember if I fed the cat before I left.

Granted. You fed it cyanide.

I wish for more cookies.

Granted. You have more cookies. But they are all stale leftover christmas cookies.

I wish for some silver paint.

Granted. You have silver paint on your freshly painted fingernails and toenails.

I actually wish tomorrow was not a day off school and work since we had five days off last week.

Granted. Today is a normal workday except you think it isnt and you get fired tomorrow for not showing up today.

I wish for a fresh pot of GW Mithril Silver paint since mine decided to dry up overnight.

Granted. Enjoy your bottle of freshly melted Mithril from the mines of GWMoria! The goblins and dwarves are really peeved you didn't pay them though. *ominous music*

I wish for my paint to stop drying out.

Granted, your paint is magneticly sealed to everything, including you.

I wish my grades were good

Granted, good for a failing student.

I wish I had more coffee.

Granted. You have more coffee, but it is decaf therefore will not suit your purposes, as I figure you need it to wake up and feel un-zombie like.

I wish I could find an amazing full time job at a library that does not burn down, not end up with me dead, does not affect my life in any bad way whatsoever, and generally makes me happy. Oh and I won't show up to work without pants, lose my job due to incompetence, it will not be a dream, my co-workers will be awesome rather than annoying, and I will not decide to have an affair with any of them or do anything dumb to jeopardize it. Oh and it will have a good coffee shop, and I won't burn my tongue and there will be nothing wrong with the coffee, computers, copiers or anything else in the library. Students will come, they will do their work, and they will ask intelligent questions.

Granted, although the libary is in Moscow, attached to the university so the questions are not only on russian but are about things like quantum physics or molecular chemistry.

I wish that I always have the correct anount of money, in whatever the local curency is, to pay for whatever I was buying

Granted. You always have the exact amount of the right kind of money. But its all counterfeit.

I wish I did not have to use pliers to open my paint.