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Connor McKane wrote:Said to me by actually more than one fine upstanding young lady... and at the time, thought "Holy Crap this is Awesome!"

- - - If he/she says "Most guys can't keep up with me sexually"

I've had one say it to me. Later that night in a wheezing voice she said "I can't believe you out----ed me! No one's ever done that before..." and she passed out on the spot

Monster Rain wrote:I had a girlfriend that told me after knowing her for about 3 hours that she had been molested by a cousin as a child.

The relationship ended predictably. That broad was out of her damn mind.

I'm pretty sure every female but 1 that I've dated has been molested. It's almost a new American tradition.

KingCracker wrote:
her: Aww your still a virgin?
me: yea why?
her: Well that doesnt matter I havnt slept with to many guys, I only had 1 three some.......... and only 1 of them was black.

I see this one as a positive Other than the only one part, the statement applies also.

Monster Rain wrote:"Want to go see Twilight?"

I've hit that more than once. If you seriously want to ignore a large sect of the female population for trivial reasons then more for me

Some of my own:

Me on the prowl: "So, you hook up a lot?"
Them: "Oh yeah!"
*swap stories about how slutty we both are*
Them later in the same convo: "Yeah, I don't really get around that much. I only sleep with people I'm dating."

This is the most frustrating thing EVER. When you're at a bar in "loose" clothing, expect to be picked up. Don't act like you're some sexual god or goddess then become insta-prude before I've even made my move. If it was outright rejection I could understand, but not even that

"You're just like my ex!" said in a positive, happy way.

Both of these have come up many, many times...

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:"Want to go see Twilight?"

I've hit that more than once. If you seriously want to ignore a large sect of the female population for trivial reasons then more for me

You can have all the 12 year olds you want, buddy.

Chris Matthews is on his way to your house right now.

Monster Rain wrote:

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:"Want to go see Twilight?"

I've hit that more than once. If you seriously want to ignore a large sect of the female population for trivial reasons then more for me

You can have all the 12 year olds you want, buddy.

Chris Matthews is on his way to your house right now.

Oh, you crazy nerds with your random prejudices And there are women of the full age spectrum who like Twilight. Many of you see women who are into Twilight how they see men who are into Warhammer.

They should see it as a positive, as expensive as this hobby is.

If you're an adult and can afford it, you're an established gentleman.

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:Oh, you crazy nerds with your random prejudices And there are women of the full age spectrum who like Twilight. Many of you see women who are into Twilight how they see men who are into Warhammer.

yes, and I accept that. I also accept that I might have to watch Twilight to get the booty. I don't have to like it though.

"I dreamed I beat you up last night".

Monster Rain wrote:

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:"Want to go see Twilight?"

I've hit that more than once. If you seriously want to ignore a large sect of the female population for trivial reasons then more for me

You can have all the 12 year olds you want, buddy.

Chris Matthews is on his way to your house right now.

Also 98% of the people that I have met that feel the urge to brag about how much sex they get turn out to be a sad, lonely individual who hasn't been laid in the last six months.
And useing your own logic, since you are posting here........... the answer seems obvious.

I dated a woman who told me that she didn't look at porn when she masturbated, but rather looked at pictures and videos of women giving birth. Because, she said, "I like to see women in pain."

After we broke up, she told me that the reason we didnt' have more sex was because she had taken up martial arts, and since sex and violence were so linked to her, she didn't to sleep with me.

"Someone put carrots with my peas!"(crying and screaming o.o) Why didn't that tip me off to her being a giant neurotic mess?

jp400 wrote:

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:

Want to go see Twilight?

I've hit that more than once. If you seriously want to ignore a large sect of the female population for trivial reasons then more for me

Also 98% of the people that I have met that feel the urge to brag about how much sex they get turn out to be a sad, lonely individual who hasn't been laid in the last six months.
And useing your own logic, since you are posting here........... the answer seems obvious.

Sometimes kids who never used to and have recently started to can't shut up about it. I think I went through a phase like that.

Mannahnin wrote:Sometimes kids who never used to and have recently started to can't shut up about it. I think I went through a phase like that.

I'm pretty sure everyone does.

Even someone like me, who tends to be rather less talkative than average when it comes to such personal matters, had quite a few NC-17 conversations on the subject when I discovered what I had been missing.

Girl in bar: Just so you know, I'm into asphyxiation and dominating my partners.

Me: You might be lying, but the only way this line of conversation leads to a positive outcome for me is if it ends.

Haters gonna hate And I believe there's a minor difference between trying to make someone else feel small or trying to let people who may otherwise remain ignorant know that they can experience things they've only dreamed. I know me and what I've done, so validity arguments aren't something I much care about (I've actually commented many times before how unbelievable it all sounds ).

TBF, complaining about Twilight like it's the end of the world is pretty ridiculous in itself.

I went on a date with this guy and at dinner he starts a conversation with

"Have you ever been in trouble with the law?"
"No, have you?" I asked.

He proceeded to tell me about his probation and how he'd robbed 10 houses and stolen tv's.

Happygrunt wrote:

Automatically Appended Next Post:

Khornholio wrote:"You wife now Kyushu one week, deshou?" - This statement sends this Iron Hippy to Def-con 5 instantly.

Can you translate for the modern ignorant American?

Wifey had been out of town for a grand total of about 10 minutes when I got a phone call from one of her co-workers. My wife went to the other end of the country for a week and this gal was checking whether that was true or not. She wanted to go drinking that night. Seeing as I am the only white gorilla in town, I'm pretty easy to spot. Even people who don't know me, know me. Even my Ferris Flower Child Ninja skills couldn't pull this off....maybe

"I think we're great together, but I've got to help Jonny get off of crack. So, I'm going out with him" - Said to me in my final year of high school.

Another observation of my own, I'd tend to avoid any long term relationship with a girl whose name ends in "i". Beki, Candi, Cindi, Kathi, Barbi, etc. They're usually OK for a week or so but after that it's screaming, ex-boyfriends, fits of insanity, biting. Of course, in retrospect observing was pretty fun at times too. hubba hubba

jp400 wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:"Want to go see Twilight?"

I've hit that more than once. If you seriously want to ignore a large sect of the female population for trivial reasons then more for me

You can have all the 12 year olds you want, buddy.

Chris Matthews is on his way to your house right now.

Also 98% of the people that I have met that feel the urge to brag about how much sex they get turn out to be a sad, lonely individual who hasn't been laid in the last six months.
And useing your own logic, since you are posting here........... the answer seems obvious.

I was thinking the exact same thing...

Cannerus_The_Unbearable wrote:TBF, complaining about Twilight like it's the end of the world is pretty ridiculous in itself.

Because surely, no one would joke about the prevalence of female Twilight fans and whether or not that would be a deterrent to dating them.

How about this one? This is (more or less) an actual conversation I had with a blind date a friend of mine set me up on.

Me: Hi, Kelly? I'm Jason nice to meet you. Ready to get our seats at this nicely expensive Piano Bar?

Kelly: Hi, umm.... just to let you know, I am on my period.

Me: .....um.... what?

Kelly: I am on my period.

Me: Wh...why do you feel obligated to tell me this?

Kelly: Well, this way you won't be thinking about sex all night, and are you going to get me into bed, so we can just concentrate on getting to know one another. okay?

Me: I know all I need to know Kelly...

(P.S. She wasn't on it, 4 grey goose martinis later she was more than willing to mount me like a taxidermied Warthog!)

How this conversation would go in my case:

Me: Hi, Kelly? I'm Jason nice to meet you. Ready to get our seats at this nicely expensive Piano Bar?

Kelly: Hi, umm.... just to let you know, I am on my period.

Me: .....um.... what?

Kelly: I am on my period.

Me: Wh...why do you feel obligated to tell me this?

Kelly: Well, this way you won't be thinking about sex all night, and are you going to get me into bed, so we can just concentrate on getting to know one another. okay?

Me: You're gonna have to try harder than that.

How this conversation would go in my case:

Me: Hi, Kelly? I'm Max nice to meet you. Ready to get our seats at this nicely expensive Piano Bar?

Kelly: Hi, umm.... just to let you know, I am on my period.

Me: Yum.

Kelly: Oh look at the time....

How this conversation would go in my case:

Me: Hi, Kelly? I'm Monster Rain nice to meet you. Ready to get our seats at this nicely expensive Piano Bar?

Kelly: Hi, umm.... just to let you know, I am on my period.

Me: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!

You kept my name instead of Jason

Also, you could politely inform her you happen to have a period fetish, and now will only think about sex all night.

battle Brother Lucifer wrote:You kept my name instead of Jason

So I did...

Or say that you were told by a mysterious gypsy fortune teller that you would meet a woman on a blind date who was menstruating that would someday give birth to the Antichrist and you're afraid you have to kill her.

Monster Rain wrote:How this conversation would go in my case:

Me: Hi, Kelly? I'm Monster Rain nice to meet you. Ready to get our seats at this nicely expensive Piano Bar?

Kelly: Hi, umm.... just to let you know, I am on my period.

Me: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!

I just litterally fell out of my chair and laughed at that, thank you.

Image walking up to your friend of the opposite gender, and then having them instantly start talking about how someone of my gender ''likes me'', and when I tried to change to subject,.. let's just say NC-17.

Ugh, I actually knew a chick who was really, really into getting tied up. She actually described how she wanted to be tied up while in a Catholic schoolgirl get up. /runsaway

Lets see here...... my ex girlfriend and i were going to have sex and she decides to tell me that shes going to get me aroused then make sweet love to a banana........ needless to say afterwards, well still hearing her i stole the drivers side mirror off her dads 69 Mustang.

Anotehr good one that she said to me was "shut up! Gods talking to me!" (please note i have nothing against religion)

Slarg232 wrote:

Monster Rain wrote:How this conversation would go in my case:

Me: Hi, Kelly? I'm Monster Rain nice to meet you. Ready to get our seats at this nicely expensive Piano Bar?

Kelly: Hi, umm.... just to let you know, I am on my period.

Me: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!

I just litterally fell out of my chair and laughed at that, thank you.

LMAO exactly what i did. My wife didn't get the joke

Amaya wrote:Ugh, I actually knew a chick who was really, really into getting tied up. She actually described how she wanted to be tied up while in a Catholic schoolgirl get up. /runsaway

Nothing wrong with that.