The Deluded Minds of GW's Visual Artists

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**DiscoVader**

IN THE GRIM DARKNESS OF THE FAR FLUNG FUTURE THERE IS ONLY LIP FUR

MOUSTACHEHAMMER 40,000

**H.B.M.C.**

DarkHound wrote:Everyone is white and clean-shaven, or at worst have 5'o'clock shadow.

You sure about that son?

I count two beards in this pic alone, and we can't see the two guys with helmets on.

**Nurglitch**

So what you're saying is that we need less of this:

And more of this:

I agree!

**Vaktathi**

DarkHound wrote:Has anyone noticed that there are no beards in 40k. Everyone is white and clean-shaven, or at worst have 5'o'clock shadow. Sometimes they have awesome sideburns. The black people are token and respectably generic. Other ethnicities are officially represented in concentrated doses with Space Marine chapters. However, there are no beards among any of them. What is going on inside the minds of GW's art department?

An internet to the person who brings an official GW picture of someone with a beard!

Welcome to a high fantasy game in space with huge Tolkien, Dune, 80's action movies, and Judge Dredd inspirations drawing primarily from medieval and 20th century europe, written by white dudes in England in an office environment.

**H.B.M.C.**

Nurglitch wrote:So what you're saying is that we need less of this:

Spoiler:

Note to self - do not open this thread at work...

**ChrisCP**

Nurglitch wrote:So what you're saying is that we need less of this:
Nurglitch wrote:So what you're saying is that we need less of this:

Spoiler:

I agree!

Ah~! Hahahahahaha...

H.B.M.C. wrote:
Note to self - do not open this thread at work...

Haha. Haa!

**Melissia**

And yet there's still more beards than there are boobs. Take from that what you will.

**Nurglitch**

**ChrisCP**

Melissia wrote:And yet there's still more beards than there are boobs. Take from that what you will.

Sexual prejudice, since you gave us the choice~!

Edit: Damn you Nurglitch Ninja!

**Melissia**

Those are moobs.

**jmurph**

Slaanesh likes to provide boobs and beards! And tentacles....

**erwos**

I'm shocked that no one has brought up that the Salamanders chapter has jet black skin (and red eyes).

**NoBaconz4You**

Ascalam wrote:The old Necron Lord model had a metal pharaoh-beard

You're right though. The 'I swallowed a bear and left it's ass hanging out' fashion statement it a bit few and far between.

Hah only just noticed!

**Boba Fex**

One thing no one has mentioned (i think) is that a beard makes a damn good handle in close combat. Alexander the Great (supposedly) ordered all the men in his army to shave because of that reason.

With all their advanced genes and what-not, an average spacemarine beard can probably stop bullets; little chance that it would simply tear free if something grabbed hold.

Their electric razors must look like tiny, wide chainswords...

**Nurglitch**

I think Alexander the Great just liked stubble...

**Ascalam**

Because itchy 5 o'clock shadow motivates your army to kill, and scares the enemy

A bunch of thugs with itchy pink chins and axes would scare me

**jmurph**

Boba Fex wrote:One thing no one has mentioned (i think) is that a beard makes a damn good handle in close combat. Alexander the Great (supposedly) ordered all the men in his army to shave because of that reason.

With all their advanced genes and what-not, an average spacemarine beard can probably stop bullets; little chance that it would simply tear free if something grabbed hold.

Their electric razors must look like tiny, wide chainswords...

Space Marine beards would pull you and then hit you with a chainsword, natch.

**Micromegas**

Melissia wrote:And yet there's still more beards than there are boobs. Take from that what you will.

DE? Eldar? Chaos bewbs? SOB?

I think there are more boobs than beards. I mean its basically a 2 to 1 ratio.

Just saying..

**Ascalam**

So, model for model, about even, unless we're talking daemonettes...(so wrong...)

**Melissia**

Again,. moobs don't count

**Nurglitch**

Well, you are the expert on "moobs"...

**Micromegas**

Well,
I suppose one can always get some greenstuff and add boobs and a brownbag (helm.). . .

**Boba Fex**

jmurph wrote:
Boba Fex wrote:One thing no one has mentioned (i think) is that a beard makes a damn good handle in close combat. Alexander the Great (supposedly) ordered all the men in his army to shave because of that reason.

With all their advanced genes and what-not, an average spacemarine beard can probably stop bullets; little chance that it would simply tear free if something grabbed hold.

Their electric razors must look like tiny, wide chainswords...

Space Marine beards would pull you and then hit you with a chainsword, natch.

...Someone think of a rule for this, now.

**Ascalam**

works like Zogwort's snake infestation attacks?

Extra d6 attacks at a different initiative, only rending instead od poison? Maybe add an infantry version of the magnagrapple rules to it, with a range of 2''....

aaargh.. must... pour...clorox...in...ears...

My brain is infested with that image now...

**DarkHound**

So long as it isn't like a Mindflayer's brain-eating attack... ugh, a grapple check for each tentacle.

Speaking of breasts though, does anyone else think it odd a class based society has the best representation of females? Sisters of Battle are an after-thought, and Slaaneshi units are only female enough to cause discomfort.

**Mukkin'About**

for something that supposedly seduces you to death... not really that attractive. they looked much better in their previous incarnation. But having their tits out was a no-no since Gw now panders to kids who couldn't afford to buy miniatures on their own. How rich is your dad?

**Nurglitch**

Have you even looked at the Fiends of Slaanesh? They have more breasts than strictly necessary. That beast has more nipples than the entire Blood Angels chapter. Besides, they're not the daemons of seduction, they're the daemons of violent rape.

Although I had the thought of using old Epic metal Fiends on their bases...

**Erik Wolfbrother**

That's why you gotta sculpt your own man-wool!

Beards are there, you just gotta grow them ;D

**jordanis**

im surprised no one mentioned the mongolian space mexicans...i mean rough riders, they have creepy beards