You receive a war against the Hipponation

I insert my Saga rule set.

You receive the same Saga rule set translated into an alien language.

I insert a Starfleet Type 2 Phaser.

You receive a phased plasma pulse rifle in the 40 kW range.

I insert a time traveling cyborg

You receive abs

I insert California

You receive a Hawaiian Shirt!

I insert a rock lobster.

you receive a severe thunderstorm.

I insert a tornado.

You receive well wishes to stay safe.

I insert the same thunderstorm on the East coast

You receive a tornado out of that thunderstorm.

i insert what's left of California's water supply.

You recieve Jarate and riots.

I insert a brick.

You receive pieces of a brick.

I insert a locked thread.

You receive all the potential in the world

I insert a bag of internet

You receive a Santa's sack of goodies, with some noticeably less than politically correct items interspersed among the children's toys.

I insert my Star Wars phase I clone trooper action figure that I got in 2003 or so.

You receive the force awakens

I insert George Lucas

You receive an old campfire tale. With lasers.

I insert the time I should've spent here.

You recieve a stopped clock made of empty space.

I insert a photocopied Dreadknight and a guide to good model design.

You receive a model of an Amp suit (from Avatar).

I insert a Na'vi.

You receive a blue skinned sex goddess

I insert THE WHOLE NINE YARDS!

You get THE FULL MONTY !

I insert Monty

You get a Python.

I insert the Holy Grail.

You receive an angry frenchman.

I insert a brioche.

You receive a bun.

I insert Mel Gibson

You get some badass movies.

I insert a box of doughnuts.

You receive Stan Mikita

Excellent munchables

I insert a banana

You receive a Scout Bike.

I insert an Attack Bike.

You receive a side car

I insert a normal car

You receive a tram car

Watch the tram car!

I insert boardwalk pizza

you receive cheese pizza.

I insert a land raider

You receive Jonny Quest

I insert Space Ghost

You get Brak.

Yeah buddy!

I insert Zorak.

You receive my dick in a box.

I insert my dick in a box.

You receive small peepee syndrome.

I insert a camel

You get lung cancer.

I insert the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

You receive a tailing off series

I insert a book on the Apollo programme

You get Space: 1999

I insert Time Tunnel.

You receive a Life Sized Land Raider.

I insert a miniature land raider.

You recieve a blue plastic brick than weighs several tons.

I insert a unbreakable lamp.

You receive a genie.

I insert the secret recipe.

You receive food

I insert rations

You receive freeze dried raisins.

I insert a 4" piece of tubing

You receive Nothing.

I insert Nothing.

You receive Gmork (google if you are that young)

I insert Atreyu (the band or the character....all the same.)

You receive a scratched head.

I insert a bronze shield.

You receive a piece of copper and a piece of tin.

I insert a can of mixed nuts.

You get the Dakka forums.

I insert the last dollar.

You receive alcoholism

I insert a blend of vodka and scotch to warm you up on cold winter nights

(maybe this should be in the avatar forums, but James, you should have brought some when you went into Russia)

You receive a Vostroyan.

I insert a wet kipper.

You get a wet Fish Slap.

I insert cheap vodka.

You get a bag of pickled elf bottoms.

I insert my finger.

You get a bleeding stump

I insert your whole hand

You get shot in the face with a lasgun

I insert CREEEED's face.

You receive his tactical genius and a fish slap.

I insert my trip to Russia

You recieve an infinite amount of yeast inside an opague, unopenable, unbreakable box.

I insert a mechandendrite with a sampling tool.

You receive a Go-Bot.

I insert the Snorks

You never get anything.

I insert Rick Grimes.

You receive one half of the epic rap battles in history.

I insert horse hiccups and hot dog flavored water

You recieve an average day in 'Murica

I insert 'Murica

You get a spear.

I insert Rick Mercer.

You receive an infinite amount of CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!!!!!!!!

I insert an infinite amount of CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You receive an over used punchline and a request to think outside the box.

I insert toe fungus

You get a stinky boot.

I insert a dry, red eye.

You receive an Ork

I insert KaptonBadrukk. (See how you like being thrown into the machine)

You get a pickled spider eye (Minecraft).

I insert my waste.

You receive an iPod.

I insert an iPad.

You receive windows Vista.

I insert my rear end.

You receive the front bumper of a Volkswagon Beetle. Bright red. It goes fasta than the others.

I insert a digital camera.

You get a picture of the vending machine.

I insert Codex: Dark Angels.

You reveive a wedgie

I insert Codex: Space Wolves (way cooler, no one would ever give a space wolf a wedgie)

You receive a machine you don't know what to do with.

I insert a machine that makes people randomly gak their pants.

You recieve explosive bowel cancer.

I insert Badrukk's bowels.

You receive a telegraph.

I insert a roman aqueduct.

You receive a Roman Gladius.

I insert CREEEEEEED'S rear end.

You recieve the bottom half of a Warhound Titan.

I stick a flashlight into the machine and look around in it.

You are Blinded by the the light.

I insert Mannford Mann's Earth Band.

You receive a rare earth magnet

I insert all the people telling me to magnetise my models

You receive May 25 2011

I insert a Tornado Warning.

You recieve a tornade made of eye lubricants.

I insert the space-time continuum.

You get a textbook on physics.

I insert Sheldon Cooper.

You receive a lecture on Captain Picard.

I insert a bottle of my weewee.

You receive a road that will take you all the way home.

I insert decently painted guardsmen models I wish were executed slightly better.

You receive models that are, in game terms, squishy things.

I Insert the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man

You receive Diabetes Type 23

I insert everyone on Dakka.

You recieve a jaded, GW-hating, WAAC, legally insane 25 year old.

I insert a sponge.

You get a mass migration.

I insert a vertical book stack.

You receive a battlewagon.

I insert $66

You receive 66 dollar store gift cards.

I insert my sword.

You get an Adepta Sororita's scabbard.

I insert a pyrovore.

You receive a fire Happy weirdo.

I insert my amputated arm.

You recieve mechandendrites.

I pour liquid chocolate into the machine.

You get hollow chocolate Easter Eggs.

I insert the Herald of Valoria.

You get Zelda.

I insert Snurl.

You get Me.

I insert a memory stick.

You recieve a memetic kill agent.

I insert a memetic kill agent.

You receive my worst nightmare

I insert Faibaddon's worst nightmare

You receive me dancing in a thong to Gerardo's Rico Suave one hit wonder from the early 90's.

I insert a sippy cup.

You get a slippin' Jimmy.

What do you insert?

You recieve a pile of cats, made of chocolate.

I insert a healthy tumor.

You get Arnold Schwarzenegger saying "It's not a tumor!"

I insert Lou Ferrigno.

You get ripped!

I insert Codex: Sly Marbo.

You receive hopes and dreams, and one guy shouting "Ermagherd yet another codex with like, no units in, like, OMG GW, stop messing around, get your gak straight, ermagherd!"

I insert the Bowie bulge

You get a lump.

I insert big hair.

You receive a lady.

I shine a dim light into the machine to see what's going on in there.

You receive blindness and amnesia

I insert amnesia spray

You receive a portal to the nether.

I insert a bottle of mysterious milky liquid.

You receive a vault key to the local sperm bank.

I insert a microwave.

You get a hot plate of cold food.

I insert a virgin sacrifice.

You recieve a gateway with 9 tentacles emerging from it. The tips of the tentactles generate more tentacles, which in turn generate more tentacles.

I insert a baby seal.

You get clubbed over the head.

I insert old VHS tapes.

You receive severe thunderstorms

I insert torrential rains that flooded my front yard this morning.

Wtf?

You receive a VHS DVD player....

I insert a dime.

You receive a bottle of milk.

I insert that key to the local sp*rm bank.

You receive a different bottle of milk.

I insert a broken mauler fiend and my hammer.

You receive a cat calmly licking itself

I insert a dog, a much better pet and life choice

You receive a tactical genius, aren't you lucky.

I insert a tyranid carnifex.

You receive a lot of crashing noises, and a big hole in the machine where the Carnifex got out.

I insert the Carnifex again.

You recieve a *Prepared Carnifex Heart*

You insert your poor memory and receive a fish slap.

I insert a piece of Sawney Bean's dinner!

(Do your homework people. Don't give me a thunderstorm warning or a piece of bacon or CREEEEEEEEEEEEED!)

You get Mr. Bean's adventures, the entire first season, on DVD.

I insert The Keep.

You receive a stone wall.

I insert 300000000 Hormagaunts (will that fit?!).

You receive instant death.

I Insert my attack bike

You. Receive. A. Peace. Of. Bacon. *smirks and winks at james*

I. Insert. A. Thunderstorm. Warning.

(Eat your heart out m9)

 KaptinBadrukk wrote:
You receive a tactical genius, aren't you lucky

It's some tactical genius.

You receive 60mph winds

I insert quarter size hail

You receive a fun time

I insert singing in the rain

You receive a bag of marbles

I insert a Land Speeder Box with nothing in it.

You receive a tired trapeze artist and a sack of bull testicles.

I insert all of my Dakka mates.

You receive hours of fun poker nights

I insert hours of terrible poker nights

You receive a bowl of popcorn and the weather channel.

I insert Dorothy Gale

You receive a confused expression

I insert a clever expression

You receive Joker.

I insert an exclamation mark. !

You receive shock and awe

I insert Vietnam

You receive a rain forest and claymores.

I insert the Suez Canal

You receive a crisis

I insert crisis 2

You receive Cuba in the 1960's

I insert Sawney Bean

You receive Sweeney Todd

I insert Scotland (read successionist arseholes)

Secessionist you mean?

You receive the idea of an autonomous nation.

I insert my support.

You receive a rod of rebar, fired at 376m/s
I insert FW IG Hostile Environment upgrade pack torsos (They look awesome)

You receive Victoria miniatures tannenburg fusiliers

I insert a beastman

You recieve a furry.

I insert a chocolate cake.

You receive an empty plate

I insert an apple

You receive the very pissed-off Omnissiah.

I insert myself into the machine (risky).

You receive tentical eldar porn

I insert a concerned councillor

You receive a thunderblog.

I insert a locked thread.

You receive a padlock and a piece of twine.

I insert 888 Bloodletters of Khorne.

You receive 666 nurglings

I insert 111 screamers of tzeench

You receive having this thread PURGED with FIRE!!!
I insert my last flamer canister

You get a marshmellow on a stick!

I insert a hollow rabbit.

(Is it chocolate?) You receive a species of plant that is extinct in the 41st millennium(Cocoa) (Thank the emperor for Chrome's spell checker)
I insert an impending birthday

You get the electric bill.

I insert a can of WD-40.

You receive a face

I insert a leg

You receive a painless amputation.

I insert that amputated leg.

You receive a silver mackerel tabby (google if you don't know what that is)

I insert a soft, fuzzy object.

You recieve a lump of tissue consistent with cat stomach membranes.

I insert Conrad Curze

You receive Joe Biden.

I insert an angry politician.

You receive Sawney Bean.

I insert Scottish myths

You receive verse two of the United Kingdom's national anthem

I insert the Queen

You receive Hitler.

I insert Mitt Romney.

You recieve a person wearing a Google hat.

I insert my router.

lliu wrote:
You receive Hitler.

I insert Mitt Romney.

You receive nuts

I insert a piece of bacon.

You receive a pissed off JamesGang

I insert a hippo

You receive lots of crashing.

I insert a cat.

You receive a face

I insert that same face with cat scratch marks on it

You get a feverish Ted Nugent.
I insert leftover ham.

You receive delicious leftovers with which to make breakfast.

I insert a moldy peep.

You get last years leftover Halloween candy.

I insert an empty dishwasher.

You receive an ironing board.

I insert an iron

You receive a burn.

I insert some of my bitz.

You receive a C&D to retain your bits and to not redistribute.

I insert a battery operated boyfriend.

You get a coin-operated Goy.

I insert a Foreigner belt that gives the wearer "all the powers of 70's supergroup, Foreigner."

You receive a flight round the globe

I insert a laser

You get a flashlight.

I insert a block of C4 (rigged to explode in 30 seconds!)

You recieve a [DATA EXPUNGED]. Your death and the deaths of anyone in the building with you are covered up.

I insert an X-Sponge.

You get an X-ray.

I insert the value of X.

You recieve pie.

I insert an egg.

You get crack.

I insert the extra bitz box.

You receive all the lost information in the universe

I insert a scroll

You receive the dust of disappearance

I insert a piece of pancetta.

You receive a restaurant menu printed in Italian.

I insert a can of Spaghetti-Os.

You get cat food.

I insert a sharp pencil.

You receive a paper cut

I insert batman

You receive a note telling to kindly refrain from putting meaningless self-confident junk in the machine.

I insert the XI chapter.

You receive the 3rd diaper

I insert an aquarium

You get a terrarium.

I insert dinner.

You get Irish breakfast.

I insert my ipad

You receive an ipod.

I insert a peace of bacon.

You receive a fish slap!

Welcome back buddy!

I insert a gefilte fish

Thanks for the welcome! Had to track a severe weather outbreak (spc.noaa.gov for more details)

You receive a cod fish

I insert my nook.

You receive breakfast.

I insert a twister

A mysterious hand reaches out of the machine, lunges at your chest, and...
You get a nurple!

I insert a Covenant Grunt.

You get a sore finger.

I insert oxygen.

You recieve H2O2.

I insert a piece of paper with a Monty Python skit on it.

You get a Parrot. Its not dead, really.

I insert a random Star Trek episode.

You get some sort of alcohol. It is green.

I insert an unpainted Tyranid army.

You receive a facepalm.

I insert a big explosion.

You get a firecracker.

I insert a whole string of firecrackers.

You get Defensive Grenades.

I insert a 3-way battle report between Nurglings, Canoptek Scarabs and Ripper Swarms.

You receive Space Marine, the novel.

I insert C.S.Lewis

You receive SC lewis.

I insert Bruce Rauner (See what you think of budget cuts, dumbass)

You receive possibly the worst greatest pension reform ever!

I insert these four fingers

You receive 2 middle fingers. No hands, just fingers.
I insert today being my birthday!

You get a cake and a fishslap.

I insert my cat.

You recieve your house covered in fur, inside and out. (That seems to be what my cat does)
I insert an invoice for a Valkyrie.

You get sticker shock.

I insert some reasonably priced wargame figures.

you get Bones

I insert bones....

You get a pot of Usbshati Bone (Can't spell)
I insert Mechanum standard grey.

You receive Trstors enamel metallic purple.

I insert ELO

Thread not updating for me again....uh oh...

 Ascalam wrote:
you get Bones

I insert bones....

You get the American National Anthem.

I insert the dawn's early light.

You get what so proudly we haled.

I insert the twilight's last gleaming.

Wait you skipped two people!? Wtf?

You receive the rockets red glare.

I insert the proof through the night

You receive the cats and dogs meowing a woofing the song.

I insert the orks singing the song.

You receive a chambered round to the forehead.

I insert the next round

You get 11 shot glasses filled with top shelf whiskey.

I insert the Ghostbusters theme song.

You get something strange in the neighborhood.

I insert the Ecto-1.

You receive the traveler.

I insert a Moldavian painting

You get a D&D boxed set from 1980.

I insert a rusty sled.

You receive a blizzard in which to go sledding in.

I insert a winter storm warning.

You get a dusting.

I insert some old Mustang parts.

You get an ICE storm

I insert a thunderstorm

NinjaJc01 wrote:You recieve your house covered in fur, inside and out. (That seems to be what my cat does)
I insert an invoice for a Valkyrie.

The Vending Machine feels strongly that you should also get a quote from Elon Musk.

KaptinBadrukk wrote:You get an ICE storm

I insert a thunderstorm

You receive Benjamin Franklin with cybernetic enhancements, powered by his jar of lightning.

I insert aforementioned quote from Elon Musk.

::::Have to flip this as I'm not posting link to picture. I'm doing an attachment::::


I insert pandemonium.


You receive:

You get Pandorum.

I insert a roll of twentys.

You receive nothing

I insert a sex dungeon filled with wolves that haven't been fed in ten days.

You receive a fish slap!

I insert some fish.

Fish fish fish

You get a dead parrot.

I insert old record albums.

You recieve a pair of toms

I insert a box of kroot

You receive Lars Ulrich drumming skills.

I insert Snurl

You receive a pumpkin.

I insert an SPC high risk day with lots of PDS tornado watches.

You get cats and dogs.

I insert an STD prevention device.

snurl wrote:You get a dead parrot.

It's not dead! Look, it's just sleeping there!

snurl wrote:You get cats and dogs.

I insert an STD prevention device.

You receive vouchers to attend a full course of AA meetings.

I insert 5 D20.

You receive 5 natural 20s.

I insert more BS.

You get a Crystal Skull.

I insert a whip and a fedora.

You recieve a tight black leather suit.

I insert Bill

You receive over 9000 turkeys

I insert some fish fish fish fish fish fish

You receive a towel whipping and the request from France to stop it this instant!

I insert a moonraker!

You get a Russian space satellite.

I insert Gorbachev.

You get a forehead splotch.

I insert Tony Blair.

Damn you!
You receive a better England for tomorrow's today!

I insert Dan Quayle

Gosh I hope I receive a potatoe

You get a potato.

I insert a Potatoe.

You get Chips, oh and KaptinBadrukk's favorite aquatic creature.
I insert a can of Chaos Black

You get Chips, oh and KaptinBadrukk's favorite aquatic creature.
I insert a can of Chaos Black.

You get a Nintendo Gameboy.

I insert a Pingas.

You get a Pongas.

I insert a well.

You receive well.

I insert my dropbox.

You recieve piracy charges.

I insert a brick.

You receive a brick road.

I insert a loving poem.

You get Fifty shades.

I insert said Fifty Shades back in.

you receive a pile of bondage equipment

I insert a slave

You recieve cane sugar

I insert Minecraftforum

You receive Terraria Wiki.

I insert Ryu Hayabusa

You get a shuriken to the face.

I insert a deck of tarot cards.

You get a reading.

I insert sulpher.

You receive some tactical genius, aren't you lucky (he knows how to deal with sulpher)

I insert a data-slate filled with Storm Reports.

You get a mugger.

I insert a policeman.

You get the song "r*tarded policeman".

I insert myself into the machine.

You really don't want to know what happens to you in the vending machine.

I insert a bottle of disinfectant.

You get angry flies.

I insert the rest of the Iced Tea.

You receive Coco.

I insert NWA

You get the ETO.

I insert a pkz vi "tiger 1" tank.

You receive a peace of bacon.

I insert a fish slap

You get a whale whallop.

I insert a harpoon.

You get a typhoon.

I insert a "Large and extremely Dangerous tornado"

You get a Land Speeder Tornado.

I insert a bunch of Zerglings.

You get a bunch of Nurglings

I insert a khorne-sized whoopee cushion.

You receive a throne of skulls

I insert a skull

You receive November 17 2013

I insert April 27 2011

You get 12/07/1941.

I insert a losing lottery ticket.

You receive the combination an idiot puts on his luggage.

I insert a winnebago. With wings.

You receive combination 99-99-99

I insert Location X

You receive mega maid.

I insert raspberry jam

You receive the downside of the Schwartz.

I insert Spaceballs the Flamethrower ®.

OP here, I can't believe this took off like it did... 80 pages and counting, keep up the good work!

You receive a thrown pair of flaming balls, IN SPAAAAAAAAACE!!!

I insert a single OOP Slaaneshi Noise Terminator

It was all because of me......and my gang!

You receive a broken model of the same sort.

I insert a Mars bar.

You receive Venus Gas

i insert an airhead.

You recieve my brother's roommate, minus head.

I insert .14 of a pie.

You receive 3/4 of a 1/2 of .14%

I insert my 90s fashion.

You recieve fish coming endlessley out of the machine, all fish slapping you.

I insert the fish.

Fish fish fish

You get burnt bacon and horsemeat soaked in warm beer, served in an empty can of vegetables.

I insert a lot of chicken bones.

You get a lot of Angry Birds!

I insert Angry Birds.

You get Pac-Man.

I insert vending machine food.

You receive hot chips.

I insert a severe thunderstorm warning

You get turtle-sized hail containing real turtles).

I insert a coat hanger.

You get a mild shock.

I insert some glow-in-the-dark paint.

You receive the nuclear waste responsible for its glow-in-the-dark properties. You are beginning to glow in the dark as well.

I insert a day involving nice weather and ice cream.

You get a warm summer day in Buffalo

I insert a 20% chance for the Sabres to get McDavid.

You get a fifth of a sabre, only the hilt (and maybe a bit of the blade)
I insert Edge Highlighting.

You receive an Edge Lightning

I insert Face Paint not meant for faces.

You recieve a rubber comedy mask.

I insert an empty box of Skitarii.

You get Eldar bait.

I insert fifty cents.

You get a bullet proof vest.

I insert a hardcore scatalogical porno.

You receive some pictures of inappropriate places.

I insert a normal, canadian $1 coin.

You receive a fish slap!

I insert a tornado watch in Florida, Alabama and Georgia.

You receive a Tornados watch made in Taiwan

I insert my chances of beating eldar, ever...

You recieve infinity.

I insert a garbage compactor.

You get an Eldar Codex.

I insert fortune cookies.

You receive a little chinese man.

I insert the terra cotta army

You receive a space marine army.

I insert an ork army

You receive B.A Baracus.

I insert a broken rule set.

You get Matt Ward.

I insert a cordless phone.

You receive a cell phone

I insert a plant