| Author |
Message |
 |
|
|
|
|
Advert
|
Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you:
- No adverts like this in the forums anymore.
- Times and dates in your local timezone.
- Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance.
- Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely.
- Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net.
If you are already a member then feel free to login now. |
|
 |
2011/01/30 13:23:10
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Devestating Grey Knight Dreadknight
|
Van Braun wrote:(Two Guard, discussing a nearby Multimelta Retributer Sister)
A: I fear her foes, that thing has massive Armour Penetration!
B: Oh Yeah? I'd like to penetrate HER armour!
(Hijinks ensue)
Continued!
*terminator walks up next to them*
I believe I will be deep striking and -power-fisting her.
*Tau steps up*
Well, IT IS for the greater good.
*Tyranid walks up*
Leeeett me devourr herr.
*Eldar walks up*
I believe it is time to get out my vibro-cannon.
*Ork watching from a distance*
...BOSS! DEY IS MUKKIN ABOUT!
|
|
|
 |
|
2011/01/30 22:41:13
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Water-Caste Negotiator
|
Every new squad of Ultramarines:
Ultramarine Scout: "Hey guys, I just realized something. We're Ultramarines, and we're blue. Ultramarine blue. Get it?"
(Chaplain hits him with the Croxius Arcanum)
Chaplain: "Anyone else have anything to say about our name?"
(Other Scouts look around awkwardly)
Tau Fire Warriors: "CHARGE!!!"
Ork Loota: "That's enough Dakka!"
|
 Black Widow Assault Cadre 2000 Points (Under Renovation- Playable) Win-4 Lose-5 Draw-1
 Storm Angels 1st Company 2500 Points (DA Codex) (Under Renovation - Playable) Win-3 Lose-4 Draw-3
 Corsairs of Fate 1750 Points (Under Construction - Playable) Win-2 Lose-3 Draw-1
 Protectorate of Menoth 11 Points (Project Delayed Indefinitely) Win-1 Lose-3 Draw-0
 Imperial Guard Regiment (Unnamed) 1000 Points (Project Delayed Indefinitely)
 Cygnar 25 Points (Planned) Win-0 Lose-0 Draw-0
Last Game(s): The Spearhead Annihilation Battle between my Storm Angels First Company (Dark Angels) and Skystompa's Waagghh! (Blood Angels) resulted in a MAJOR VICTORY!
|
|
|
|
|
2011/01/30 22:56:07
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Fixture of Dakka
|
space wolves not fetching.
tau charging.
an ork saying "too much dakka"
a blood angel saying "too over-the-top and cheesy"
a tyranid that gets full up.
a 5 foot squat.
a 40-year-old guardsman.
a daemon saying "nah, too messed up."
khorne saying "too much blood."
grey knight: "hey, have you ever noticed how we're called grey knights, but we're silver?"
"nah."
"oh well. As you were."
a black templar getting homesick.
a death korpsman crapping himself.
|
DS:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Plotr06#+D+++A++++/eWD251R+++T(Ot)DM+
JB: I like the concept of a free Shrike roaming through the treetops of the jungle. I'm not sure that I like the idea of a real Shrike sitting on my couch eating my Skittles.
corpsesarefun: Thank god I missed be nice to shrike day.
greenskin lynn: because of all the skittles and soda, you basically live off sugar water, like some sort of freakish human-hummingbird hybrid. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/02 11:53:10
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Hardened Veteran Guardsman
|
On all Medi-packs and Nartheciums:
"Usage: Use on any wound caused by enemy shooting or melee attacks."
"Directions: Apply to all squad members."
"Warning: Does not protect from instant death."
Directions on Sanguiniary Priests:
"Directions: Apply to all nearby squads"
|
 Buy Imperial War Bonds
Killing daemons, heretics, witches, worse witches, mindless robots, traitors, hungry bugs, green skins and space communists needs your monetary support. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/02 12:15:04
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Long-Range Land Speeder Pilot
|
The Emperor of Man in the 41st millennium: "uhh hello? anyone out there? I have been waiting soooo long for a roll of toilet paper....."
|
You are not free whose liberty is won by the rigour of other, more righteous souls. Your are merely protected. Your freedom is parasitic, you suck the honourable man dry and offer nothing in return. You who have enjoyed freedom, who have done nothing to earn it, your time has come. This time you will stand alone and fight for yourselves. Now you will pay for your freedom in the currency of honest toil and human blood.  |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/02 21:39:20
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Warp-Screaming Noise Marine
|
Kharn: I gave blood today at the local childrens hospital.
BLOOD FOR THE UNDER FUNDED CHILDRENS HOSPITAL!
|
|
|
|
|
|
2011/02/02 22:42:45
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Sybarite Swinging an Agonizer
|
Thinkin his WAAAGH be needin dat extra sumffin. Grazkull, nowing da Meks are always makin moar dakka, turns to Mad Dok to make sumffin splodey. So Dok finishes up his latest kreeashun, Da 'Reeps
Gaurdsman of some random armored division: Uhh, Commander, Sir
CMD: Yes?
GM: the Greenskins are deploying what looks like green blocks
CMD: huh?
GM: and they are moving towards us
CMD: Well, there are too few to waste ammo on, *over vox* prepair to flatten them
'reeps: sssssssssssssssssssssssss. . . .
All coms from the Random Armored Division cut out into a multitude of explosions, followed by static.
|
"There are five possible operations for any army. If you can fight, fight; if you cannot fight, defend; if you cannot defend, flee; if you cannot flee, surrender; if you cannot surrender, die. " Sima Yi
DS:90SGM+B--IPw40k09#+D++A+++/sWD-R+T(S)DM+
_██_
(ಠ_ృ) |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/02 22:57:41
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Stealthy Grot Snipa
Right behind you. No, really.
|
Anidem wrote:Thinkin his WAAAGH be needin dat extra sumffin. Grazkull, nowing da Meks are always makin moar dakka, turns to Mad Dok to make sumffin splodey. So Dok finishes up his latest kreeashun, Da 'Reeps
Gaurdsman of some random armored division: Uhh, Commander, Sir
CMD: Yes?
GM: the Greenskins are deploying what looks like green blocks
CMD: huh?
GM: and they are moving towards us
CMD: Well, there are too few to waste ammo on, *over vox* prepair to flatten them
'reeps: sssssssssssssssssssssssss. . . .
All coms from the Random Armored Division cut out into a multitude of explosions, followed by static.
10000000 pts to those who understand the reference 
|
|
|
|
|
|
2011/02/02 23:12:53
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Fixture of Dakka
|
^ uuh...sorry to disapoint...  ^
|
DS:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Plotr06#+D+++A++++/eWD251R+++T(Ot)DM+
JB: I like the concept of a free Shrike roaming through the treetops of the jungle. I'm not sure that I like the idea of a real Shrike sitting on my couch eating my Skittles.
corpsesarefun: Thank god I missed be nice to shrike day.
greenskin lynn: because of all the skittles and soda, you basically live off sugar water, like some sort of freakish human-hummingbird hybrid. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/02 23:17:00
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Stealthy Grot Snipa
Right behind you. No, really.
|
shrike wrote:^ uuh...sorry to disapoint... ^
What?
|
|
|
|
|
|
2011/02/02 23:17:47
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Fixture of Dakka
|
I dunno...wish I did...
|
DS:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Plotr06#+D+++A++++/eWD251R+++T(Ot)DM+
JB: I like the concept of a free Shrike roaming through the treetops of the jungle. I'm not sure that I like the idea of a real Shrike sitting on my couch eating my Skittles.
corpsesarefun: Thank god I missed be nice to shrike day.
greenskin lynn: because of all the skittles and soda, you basically live off sugar water, like some sort of freakish human-hummingbird hybrid. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/02 23:36:52
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Devestating Grey Knight Dreadknight
|
I dont get the ref either.
|
|
|
|
|
2011/02/03 17:22:07
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Sybarite Swinging an Agonizer
|
'reeps = Creepers
Creepers are a creature in Minecraft, and are essentially giant green blocks that quietly sneak up on you then explode.
The only sound they ever make is a low "ssssssssssss" of a fuse burning. . .
and by the time you hear a fuse start to burn. . . its already too late
EDIT: i now have a totally AWESOME idea for Tyranid Spore Mines
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2011/02/03 17:22:55
"There are five possible operations for any army. If you can fight, fight; if you cannot fight, defend; if you cannot defend, flee; if you cannot flee, surrender; if you cannot surrender, die. " Sima Yi
DS:90SGM+B--IPw40k09#+D++A+++/sWD-R+T(S)DM+
_██_
(ಠ_ృ) |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/04 09:01:10
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Smokin' Skorcha Driver
|
Grot: SHUT UP YA BIG GREEN MORON! NOW DROP AN GIMME 50!!
|
"Friglatt Tinks e's da 'unce and futor git, but i knows better. i put dat part in when i fixed im up after dat first scrap wid does scrawn pointy ears and does pinkies." Dok chopanblok to Big Mek Dattrukk.
Victories against:  2  2  1 1 1  2  3  1  2
Died havin fun wid: 3  2 1  4 2 2 2  5 1
|
|
|
|
|
2011/02/04 17:28:07
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Fixture of Dakka
|
forrest grot:
"My runtherd always said- Life was like a looted wagon. You never know what you're gonna get."
"Have you found Mork yet, grot?
I didn't know I was supposed to be looking for him, boss."
"Anyway, like I was sayin', squig is the fruit of the sea. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, saute it. Dey's uh, squig-kabobs, squig creole, squig gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There's pineapple squig, lemon squig, coconut squig, pepper squig, squig soup, squig stew, squig salad, squig and potatoes, squig burger, squig sandwich. That- that's about it."
"Sometimes, I guess there just aren't enough bullets."
"It was a bullet, wasn't it?
A bullet?
That jumped up and bit you.
Oh, yes boss. Bit me right in the buttocks. They said it was a million-teef wound, but the army must keep those teef 'cause I still haven't seen any of that million teef."
"My given name is Buzzhed Bashy Blue, but people call me Bubba. Just like one of them ol' freeboota boyz. Can you believe that?
My name's Forrest Grot. People call me Forrest Grot."
"I had run for 3 years, 2 months, 14 days, and 16 hours.
Quiet, quiet! He's gonna say something!
...I'm pretty tired... I think I'll go home now."
anyway...
|
DS:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Plotr06#+D+++A++++/eWD251R+++T(Ot)DM+
JB: I like the concept of a free Shrike roaming through the treetops of the jungle. I'm not sure that I like the idea of a real Shrike sitting on my couch eating my Skittles.
corpsesarefun: Thank god I missed be nice to shrike day.
greenskin lynn: because of all the skittles and soda, you basically live off sugar water, like some sort of freakish human-hummingbird hybrid. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/04 18:18:20
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Stormin' Stompa
|
Chaos space marine theme song of late: "We are the pirates who don't do anything, we like to stay at home and lay around..."
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2011/02/04 18:18:48
Ask yourself: have you rated a gallery image today? |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/04 18:26:55
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Hardened Veteran Guardsman
|
@shrike : Mork Damn it grot! That is the most outstanding answer I have ever heard You are gonna be a Boss someday!
|
|
|
|
|
2011/02/04 18:39:19
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Fixture of Dakka
|
DeadGaurd wrote:@shrike : Mork Damn it grot! That is the most outstanding answer I have ever heard You are gonna be a Boss someday!
ah, forgot that one. 
|
DS:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Plotr06#+D+++A++++/eWD251R+++T(Ot)DM+
JB: I like the concept of a free Shrike roaming through the treetops of the jungle. I'm not sure that I like the idea of a real Shrike sitting on my couch eating my Skittles.
corpsesarefun: Thank god I missed be nice to shrike day.
greenskin lynn: because of all the skittles and soda, you basically live off sugar water, like some sort of freakish human-hummingbird hybrid. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/04 19:00:26
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Sneaky Sniper Drone
|
Nurgle-Ahh, what a putrid, pox ridden festering day it is...
(Kitten drops out of the sky)
Nurgle- WHAT IS THAT! GET IT AWAY! Khorne! halp!
(Nurgle throws up)
|
1500 pts
1000 pts
Out and proud pulse rifle lover. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/04 19:13:12
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Fixture of Dakka
|
continued:
nurgle gets annoyed and goes to the bunnie's homeworld, and jumps in on thier tea party.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! ICKY!!!"
*Throws up*
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! THROW-UP!!!"
*Throws up*
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! THROW-UP ON THROW-UP!!!"
*Throws up*
ect.
|
DS:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Plotr06#+D+++A++++/eWD251R+++T(Ot)DM+
JB: I like the concept of a free Shrike roaming through the treetops of the jungle. I'm not sure that I like the idea of a real Shrike sitting on my couch eating my Skittles.
corpsesarefun: Thank god I missed be nice to shrike day.
greenskin lynn: because of all the skittles and soda, you basically live off sugar water, like some sort of freakish human-hummingbird hybrid. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/04 19:30:06
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Sneaky Sniper Drone
|
*Continued, continued*
(Tzeentch raps knuckles on the table while watching nurgle)
*Sigh*
Tzeentch- Slaanesh get a chair this may be a while.
Slaanesh- Anytime Tzeentch babe.
Tzeentch-DROP IT!
|
|
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2011/02/04 19:48:14
1500 pts
1000 pts
Out and proud pulse rifle lover. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/05 17:07:42
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Legendary Master of the Chapter
|
"What the hell do you mean we out of ammo?" - Imperial Guard Commander after inspecting the ammo crates.
"You can't see me, because I can't see them." Night Legionary.
"Time to donate some blood!" Blood Angels.
"Knowledge is weakness and do not guard it well." Bone Hawk Librarian.
"Nannananannanannananananannanananannaannan BATMAN!"- Konrad Cruze when coming out of the shadows.
"My name is Commander Shepherd and this is my most favorite store in the Galaxy."
"So let me get this straight we are just going to stay here with missiles that auto detect any weaknesses in anything? Like this fortress? And we have a very unprotected munitions and budwiser containment room, that is a flaw in its design. That does not seem like a bad idea? What the hell mate." -Crimson Fist Techmarine.
"Brothers we shall USE STEEL RHAIN!" -Captain BS
|
From whom are unforgiven we bring the mercy of war. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/05 17:57:57
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Kovnik
Bristol
|
Custodian:... Anyone ever tried simply turning the Golden Throne off and on again?
|
Nerivant wrote:The Custodes are the reason Draigo is staying in the Warp.
ObliviousBlueCaboose wrote:I cant wait until i team up with a cron player an kill a land raider with a lasgun.
Black Templars- Nothing makes you manly like unalterable AV 14! |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/06 14:03:27
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Fixture of Dakka
|
"I've found a way to kill necrons and save the emperor! Give the necrons the emperor's virus and install norton to the golden throne!"
|
DS:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Plotr06#+D+++A++++/eWD251R+++T(Ot)DM+
JB: I like the concept of a free Shrike roaming through the treetops of the jungle. I'm not sure that I like the idea of a real Shrike sitting on my couch eating my Skittles.
corpsesarefun: Thank god I missed be nice to shrike day.
greenskin lynn: because of all the skittles and soda, you basically live off sugar water, like some sort of freakish human-hummingbird hybrid. |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/06 18:51:16
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Deathwing Terminator with Assault Cannon
|
Techpriest-"We've found a ancient disc from long before even the emperor took the throne, it is said to be able to defeat any Technology, it is marked windows Vista"
|
DA 4000 points W/L/D 6e 3/2/0
IG 1500 points W/L/D 6e 0/2/0
And 100% Primed! |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/06 19:47:48
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Powerful Irongut
|
Necron: "This ancient Cybernetic Xenos machine has encountered a problem and needs to close. Would you like to send an error report?"
Space Marine: "Is anyone else embarrassed that we all turned up in the same outfit?"
White Scar Rhino Driver: "They see me rollin, they laughin', And rollin' their eyes 'cause I'm so white n' nerdy"
Space Marine: "Oompa Loompa doompadee doo!"
Squat:  er
|
Grimstonefire wrote:I am feeling quite confident that by this time next year I will be holding a new CD model in my hand (07/07/10). Someone can sig that if they want.
|
|
|
|
|
2011/02/06 23:40:44
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Devestating Grey Knight Dreadknight
|
Tzeentch: "Ok, wtf just happened"
Khorne: " Live, Heal, Soothe!"
Nurgle: "Thats disgusting"
Slaanesh: "Thats a bit kinky.."
Blohd Rehvens Spess Murheen: "FOR SKITTLEES!" (Cookie to anyone who recognises the quote)
|
|
|
|
|
2011/02/08 03:12:14
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Swift Swooping Hawk
Canberra, Australia
|
Eldar on their day off: "1,000,000 channels and nothing good on"
Well, thats my joke for 9 pages. sigh*
|
Currently collecting and painting Eldar from W40k.  |
|
|
|
|
2011/02/08 05:44:20
Subject: 40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Fully-charged Electropriest
|
Magnus - "ITS A TRAAAP!"
|
|
|
|
|
2011/02/08 05:54:42
Subject: Re:40k quotes that never existed.
|
|
Horrific Howling Banshee
|
Abbadon after his capture of a blackstone fortress
ABA DABA DOOO!!!
Eldar in the Dawn of War two games "....crap" (hellboy voice)
Eldar after slaneesh was born "....crap" (hellboy voice)
Space wolves upon finding out there is no beer left in the hold ".....crap" (hellboy voice)
|
Never Say Die. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
